Goal weight still overweight
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SarahMorganP
Posts: 922 Member
Anyone else have a goal weight that still puts them in the overweight category? I am 5'2" and my goal weight is 160lbs. That puts me at overweight, 1lb under being moderately obese. The charts say the highest I should be is 121. I think that is absurdly ridiculous.
I started 12 weeks ago at 235 and am currently 198.
Anyone else have a higher goal weight?
I started 12 weeks ago at 235 and am currently 198.
Anyone else have a higher goal weight?
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Replies
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My goal is lower than yours, but I don’t think you need to worry about what those charts say. You know your body and will know where you need to be to feel good and be a healthy you. Good luck on your journey!4
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I'm 5'1, 144 lbs and my goal weight is 120. Though you don't have to strictly follow those charts. I think your goal weight is just fine, as long as it works for you, keeps you happy, and makes you a healthier person then do it 😊2
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What charts are you looking at?SarahMorganP wrote: »Anyone else have a goal weight that still puts them in the overweight category? I am 5'2" and my goal weight is 160lbs. That puts me at overweight, 1lb under being moderately obese. The charts say the highest I should be is 121. I think that is absurdly ridiculous.
I started 12 weeks ago at 235 and am currently 198.
Anyone else have a higher goal weight?
The BMI calculator I use (https://www.nhs.uk/live-well/healthy-weight/bmi-calculator/) says the ideal weight range for 5 foot 2 women is 45.6kg - 61.6kg. That converts to an upper limit of 135lbs in imperial measurements.
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It’s also possible that as you lose weight, you’ll get a better sense of your natural size. I’m not surprised that you see 120 as ridiculous, when it’s 100 pounds lighter than where you started. But the reality is that you’d still be considerably overweight at 160, and that does carry health concerns — albeit fewer than at your current size.
BMI has a range, going all the way up to about ~136 for your height. Perhaps shoot for the top of the range.
Reevaluate as you go. You may find yourself surprised.28 -
I look back at pics from when I was 120 and my body looks like a little girl. It doesn't interest me in the slightest to look like that. I got down to 165 in 2011 and stopped because I started getting comments from men. I'm not at all ok with that. I'm much older now though so I hope when I do get down to 160 it won't be the same thing.23
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SarahMorganP wrote: »I look back at pics from when I was 120 and my body looks like a little girl. It doesn't interest me in the slightest to look like that. I got down to 165 in 2011 and stopped because I started getting comments from men. I'm not at all ok with that. I'm much older now though so I hope when I do get down to 160 it won't be the same thing.
What do you mean, you started getting comments from men? You mean flirty or lecherous comments? Or they didn't like you being thinner?
I understand wanting to be invisible, that comes from years of not wanting attention - and that's one of the reasons I was overweight. I just wanted to be left alone. That may not be what you're saying, I can't tell by your post.
The reality is that being overweight carries a lot of health problems and they will multiply as you age.
I originally set my goal as the high end of the BMI scale and I was happy there for a while. Now I'm down to 21-22 BMI, and I'm much happier and healthier here. 5'7.5" 140-143 lbs.16 -
cmriverside wrote: »SarahMorganP wrote: »I look back at pics from when I was 120 and my body looks like a little girl. It doesn't interest me in the slightest to look like that. I got down to 165 in 2011 and stopped because I started getting comments from men. I'm not at all ok with that. I'm much older now though so I hope when I do get down to 160 it won't be the same thing.
What do you mean, you started getting comments from men? You mean flirty or lecherous comments?
Cat calls. Or whistles. Just gross stuff like that and it made me extremely uncomfortable. I have a phobia of men. Every second of my day is pretty much filled with thoughts of being raped or abducted. Being fat makes me feel safer since it would be a lot harder for someone to drag me anywhere at 200lbs than 120lbs.
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SarahMorganP wrote: »cmriverside wrote: »SarahMorganP wrote: »I look back at pics from when I was 120 and my body looks like a little girl. It doesn't interest me in the slightest to look like that. I got down to 165 in 2011 and stopped because I started getting comments from men. I'm not at all ok with that. I'm much older now though so I hope when I do get down to 160 it won't be the same thing.
What do you mean, you started getting comments from men? You mean flirty or lecherous comments?
Cat calls. Or whistles. Just gross stuff like that and it made me extremely uncomfortable. I have a phobia of men. Every second of my day is pretty much filled with thoughts of being raped or abducted. Being fat makes me feel safer since it would be a lot harder for someone to drag me anywhere at 200lbs than 120lbs.
Therapy would likely be helpful for you. What you’re describing isn’t about a number on a scale — it’s deeper than that. A trauma or eating disorder counselor could help you, if you let them. (I say ED because what you’re describing about staying fat to stay safe is a similar mindset to some who feel they need to be underweight and anorexic to stay safe. Same rooted behavior, but different approach to addressing it.)32 -
Having a goal weight that is not within the BMI charts is a personal choice. You may find that taking diet breaks to eat at maintenance for a few weeks at a time will better help you determine your goals. Talk with your doctor about your concerns and jointly pick a weight that makes sense for you at this time in your journey.
I am 5’1” and the upper number on the charts for me is 132. I’ve chosen 125 as my goal weight, but I don’t feel married to that goal. I was right around 130 prior to each of my pregnancies, but I was much younger then. I am taking a slow approach to see where my weight settles in.
I can completely understand your concern about unwanted comments. I get them too even at my age. I am focused only on what I can control. I can’t control what other people say. So, I ignore and move on. If you are really struggling with this, I’d encourage you to talk to a counselor about it. You deserve to be able to pick your weight based on your goals without this kind of outside influence.7 -
collectingblues wrote: »SarahMorganP wrote: »cmriverside wrote: »SarahMorganP wrote: »I look back at pics from when I was 120 and my body looks like a little girl. It doesn't interest me in the slightest to look like that. I got down to 165 in 2011 and stopped because I started getting comments from men. I'm not at all ok with that. I'm much older now though so I hope when I do get down to 160 it won't be the same thing.
What do you mean, you started getting comments from men? You mean flirty or lecherous comments?
Cat calls. Or whistles. Just gross stuff like that and it made me extremely uncomfortable. I have a phobia of men. Every second of my day is pretty much filled with thoughts of being raped or abducted. Being fat makes me feel safer since it would be a lot harder for someone to drag me anywhere at 200lbs than 120lbs.
Therapy would likely be helpful for you.
You would think. But I've been to more therapists than I can count. No help. The phobia stays. I just no longer go anywhere alone, without my husband so that helps. But even at work if I end up on the elevator with a man by myself it's full blown panic and trying to come up with all the ways I could escape if he tried anything.15 -
SarahMorganP wrote: »collectingblues wrote: »SarahMorganP wrote: »cmriverside wrote: »SarahMorganP wrote: »I look back at pics from when I was 120 and my body looks like a little girl. It doesn't interest me in the slightest to look like that. I got down to 165 in 2011 and stopped because I started getting comments from men. I'm not at all ok with that. I'm much older now though so I hope when I do get down to 160 it won't be the same thing.
What do you mean, you started getting comments from men? You mean flirty or lecherous comments?
Cat calls. Or whistles. Just gross stuff like that and it made me extremely uncomfortable. I have a phobia of men. Every second of my day is pretty much filled with thoughts of being raped or abducted. Being fat makes me feel safer since it would be a lot harder for someone to drag me anywhere at 200lbs than 120lbs.
Therapy would likely be helpful for you.
You would think. But I've been to more therapists than I can count. No help. The phobia stays. I just no longer go anywhere alone, without my husband so that helps. But even at work if I end up on the elevator with a man by myself it's full blown panic and trying to come up with all the ways I could escape if he tried anything.
Look for a better therapist, and talk to your pcp about s psych referral for medication. You deserve a better life than what you’re living, and the number on the scale has nothing to do with it.39 -
SarahMorganP wrote: »cmriverside wrote: »SarahMorganP wrote: »I look back at pics from when I was 120 and my body looks like a little girl. It doesn't interest me in the slightest to look like that. I got down to 165 in 2011 and stopped because I started getting comments from men. I'm not at all ok with that. I'm much older now though so I hope when I do get down to 160 it won't be the same thing.
What do you mean, you started getting comments from men? You mean flirty or lecherous comments?
Cat calls. Or whistles. Just gross stuff like that and it made me extremely uncomfortable. I have a phobia of men. Every second of my day is pretty much filled with thoughts of being raped or abducted. Being fat makes me feel safer since it would be a lot harder for someone to drag me anywhere at 200lbs than 120lbs.
I hear you. I have a few irrational fears sometimes myself.
I agree with collectingblues - why not get some counseling or join a support group for women or maybe even some medication? That kind of anxiety and obsessive thinking is really only hurting you. There is a way out. ((hug))
*edit to say, I see you've tried some therapy? Have you done any reading about CBT? (Cognitive Behavior Therapy) - it's really good for obsessions and anxiety. Are you getting regular exercise? That is hugely helpful for me.9 -
I'm 5foot2 and started at 210. My original GW was 155 because that's the lowest I've been as an adult. I am 154 currently and my next goal is 130. Could I be happy in the 150s? Sure. But now I have fitness related goals, running faster/farther, lifting heavier, so I'm going to see where that takes me.12
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SarahMorganP wrote: »cmriverside wrote: »SarahMorganP wrote: »I look back at pics from when I was 120 and my body looks like a little girl. It doesn't interest me in the slightest to look like that. I got down to 165 in 2011 and stopped because I started getting comments from men. I'm not at all ok with that. I'm much older now though so I hope when I do get down to 160 it won't be the same thing.
What do you mean, you started getting comments from men? You mean flirty or lecherous comments?
Cat calls. Or whistles. Just gross stuff like that and it made me extremely uncomfortable. I have a phobia of men. Every second of my day is pretty much filled with thoughts of being raped or abducted. Being fat makes me feel safer since it would be a lot harder for someone to drag me anywhere at 200lbs than 120lbs.
I totally get fat as armor.
Cat calls did go down as I aged, as did interest. When I was online dating and changed my age to 40, the volume of emails I received dropped precipitously.
I used to get a few flirty emails on this site, but none since I turned 50.
My goal weight is in the 25 BMI, which is low Overweight. That's the weight I was at when I was a full time yoga teacher and I felt good at that weight. However, I do have a large frame. http://www.myfooddiary.com/Resources/frame_size_calculator.asp (This calculator may be inaccurate for people considerably overweight. I, however, still had a large frame when I had a BMI of 23 when I was in the military.)
160 lbs is a fine goal weight for you for now. You can always reevaluate when you get there.
I suggest you take steps now to make yourself feel safer. I carry pepper spray when I'm walking in the woods. Funny, Amazon won't ship it to me, but I can buy it at a local gun store.
I took a self defense class about 20 years ago, which was great, and I've been thinking about taking a refresher.
The weapons training I had in the military did not make me feel safer, but I'm sure that is not universally true. I did do some refresher target shooting a few years back, which I am glad for.9 -
Have you considered martial arts, OP? It won't address the underlying anxiety, but I find that knowing I could do more damage than any attacker would anticipate makes it far easier for me to remain calm in response to street harassment.11
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SarahMorganP wrote: »collectingblues wrote: »SarahMorganP wrote: »cmriverside wrote: »SarahMorganP wrote: »I look back at pics from when I was 120 and my body looks like a little girl. It doesn't interest me in the slightest to look like that. I got down to 165 in 2011 and stopped because I started getting comments from men. I'm not at all ok with that. I'm much older now though so I hope when I do get down to 160 it won't be the same thing.
What do you mean, you started getting comments from men? You mean flirty or lecherous comments?
Cat calls. Or whistles. Just gross stuff like that and it made me extremely uncomfortable. I have a phobia of men. Every second of my day is pretty much filled with thoughts of being raped or abducted. Being fat makes me feel safer since it would be a lot harder for someone to drag me anywhere at 200lbs than 120lbs.
Therapy would likely be helpful for you.
You would think. But I've been to more therapists than I can count. No help. The phobia stays. I just no longer go anywhere alone, without my husband so that helps. But even at work if I end up on the elevator with a man by myself it's full blown panic and trying to come up with all the ways I could escape if he tried anything.
I went through a lot of therapists before I was able to find one who was able to help me with my predilection for making bad choices in men.
I used to have panic attacks a lot more, and am not sure why they went away, because I haven't had therapy for a number of years and do not take regular medication for it. However, I do consistently get regular exercise.
In situations like yours on the elevator I find mantras calming. In this case, I would have used the Bene Gesserit Litany against Fear from Frank Herbert's "Dune".
"I will not fear.
Fear is the mind-killer.
Fear is the little-death that brings total obliteration.
I will face my fear.
I will permit it to pass over me and through me.
And when it has gone past I will turn the inner eye to see its path.
Where the fear has gone there will be nothing. Only I will remain."
Having pepper spray in my purse and having recently taken self defense classes would also reassure me.
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In other situations I would find the Loving Kindness Meditation helpful. Here's the version I learned:
May I be full of loving kindness.
May I be well.
May I be peaceful and at ease.
May I be happy.15 -
Unless you're pretty muscular, that would still be overweight. Your body fat percentage would likely still be over 25%.SarahMorganP wrote: »Anyone else have a goal weight that still puts them in the overweight category? I am 5'2" and my goal weight is 160lbs. That puts me at overweight, 1lb under being moderately obese. The charts say the highest I should be is 121. I think that is absurdly ridiculous.
I started 12 weeks ago at 235 and am currently 198.
Anyone else have a higher goal weight?
A.C.E. Certified Personal and Group Fitness Trainer
IDEA Fitness member
Kickboxing Certified Instructor
Been in fitness for 30 years and have studied kinesiology and nutrition
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P.S. I've recently taken up weight-lifting and it occurs to me that increasing your personal strength could also help you manage the fear.
EDIT: I say this because you strike me as a rational person in general. Someone who thinks about how heavy she would be to drag when she's managing her fear seems to be someone who would be able to use knowing how heavy an attacker she could shove.5 -
Sadly I am unable to do any exercise at this point. I used to walk 3 miles a day and lift heavy and loved it. No I am unable to walk even 10min due to a disease. So no martial arts or weight lifting for me. And of course my lack of any physical activity has made my fears worse because now I know I wouldn't be able to fight or run away. I also know that if I were abducted I would be dead pretty quickly without my lifesaving meds so that also has me on edge. I'm a mess. lol8
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Oh in that case ignore me. That sucks and I'm sorry.1
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