off topic but i need help

Don't most states have Statutory laws... she's under age....he's legal. This is a big deal.
People need to be notified.

that would be considered rape, whether or not she gave consent. you need to get speak with the parent and get the police involved. Also, this is a very traumatic and damaging thing. Have her speak to a trained professional. A trusted guidance councilor would be good.

There is this 15 year old girl that looks up to me a lot. I am 23 and I spend a lot of time with her. This past week an 18 year old boy took advantage of her. She told me. I feel like it is my responsibility to do something about it but I don't know what to do.....she lost her mom a few years ago and has an off relationship with her dad. Any ideas? I'm offering her a ton of support and have spent time with her. This is tough......

a crisis line call right now would give you the best direction. I don't know your area but here if a professional is told about a child or elderly person that's been harmed they have to legally report it. SO if you are looking for a direction you can give the details that you know without the girls name and ask who you would want to contact first.

I know many have suggested the police but having a male police officer stop by and pick her up by herself to go down to the station to make a statement might freak her out even more.

A social services type rape/spouse/abuse crisis line would be perfect if you have one in your area! What they'll do here is have a female escort her to make the statement and do a rape kit (if that's still even possible ..unsure exactly when this happened).

As an adult mentor you know you need to take action Hon or you wouldn't have posted here. Sounds like you're more looking for WHO to contact first rather than asking us if you should. Least that's my take on it.

Check the blue pages if you have them in your phonebook to find a crisis line or the front of your phonebook there might be emergency numbers there.

If you text her or phone her on her cell that you will be doing it will help keep the trust with you two so she knows she'll always have a safe person to talk too. But if that's simply not possible then we as adults have to protect children from things that harm them, 18 is considered a predator as he is an adult and she is not. Perhaps if you feel strong enough you could offer to go with her? As it definitely sounds like she trusts you! :flowerforyou:

Sending you strength to do the right thing for her and you both!

PM if you need to chat about it. I'd be more than happy to listen....

Someone made a great point, what would you want someone to do if this was your child...sometimes that's hard to think about unless we have our own but it's something to definitely consider.

Sending up a lil prayer for you both:flowerforyou:

FC

FC is right - definately a crisis line is in order for you. Check out RAINN (Rape, Abuse and Incest National Network) at this address:

http://www.rainn.org/

They have an online crisis help center too.

Bless you for being there for this girl - It can be a heavy burden for you as well. I too am available for a pm if you need to talk. In most states I believe this is statutory rape. Typically if the aggressor is 18 or over, and the victim is 3 or more years younger the statutory rape laws kick in - however, if this is a "date rape" type situation, the girl may feel a lot of guilt and have a hard time telling anyone but you. I really think RAINN will be a good resource for you - or definately too, your local Rape Crisis Center or Child Advocacy Center.

I was in social work for years and worked specifically with survivors of rape, incest and abuse. I have also worked in the legal system as a victim's advocate so trust me, I understand the weight of what you are faced with. Good for you for reaching out and I congratulate you on your great instinct in doing so!!:flowerforyou: We need more people like you in the world!!

lulu

Oh that is bad. Well,...... She trust you very much sees you as a mother type. I think she told you because she needs you to guide her she is probably unsure of what to do and wants you to take control. So, you sit down and talk to her with kindness and be firm and tell her you love her and you will be there but she needs to tell her father and call the police asap.As long as you are there it will give her courage.
The reason I know is that something similar happened to someone I love a few months ago and I did exactly that,it was tough but she was greatfull that I sorta push her in the right direction but I was there all the way. Right now she needs someone strong to help her out and guide her. You can do this.
Let us know what happens.
Good Luck

I am so happy to know that there are people like you all in this world... I have 2 daughters, and I would hope that if I were unavailable for some reason, they would have a person to come to like you... I'll be praying for you, and hope that everything works out... Please keep us posted...

Oh that is bad. Well,...... She trust you very much sees you as a mother type. I think she told you because she needs you to guide her she is probably unsure of what to do and wants you to take control. So, you sit down and talk to her with kindness and be firm and tell her you love her and you will be there but she needs to tell her father and call the police asap.As long as you are there it will give her courage.
The reason I know is that something similar happened to someone I love a few months ago and I did exactly that,it was tough but she was greatfull that I sorta push her in the right direction but I was there all the way. Right now she needs someone strong to help her out and guide her. You can do this.
Let us know what happens.
Good Luck

I am so happy to know that there are people like you all in this world... I have 2 daughters, and I would hope that if I were unavailable for some reason, they would have a person to come to like you... I'll be praying for you, and hope that everything works out... Please keep us posted...

I am also a mother of a daughter and feel the same way. I was actualy tearing up when I was writing this and remembering what happend, I think that is the reason I started gaining weight again:noway:

I agree with what FC said.

It is statutory rape. Her consent is immaterial because she is a minor. He is an adult. You are doing the right thing. Don't prolong, or think about it. Just do it. Call the crisis line.

Would taking her to the hospital be an option too? Don't they have crisis/rape nurse something called SANE/Sexual Assault Nurse Examiner program on staff that deals with this that works with all the branches involved, of police, hospital staff, social work, and rape victim advocacy groups.

Whatever you do, do it soon. Or analysis paralysis would set in.

Tks for reaching out for help and I admire your courage to do the right thing for this very young 15 yr girl.We're all behind you giving you strength.

Good to hear. You're a wonderful, strong, and brave person and she's lucky to have you as her friend. I agree, keep the details to a minimum because it's in the legal system now. Tks for keeping us posted. Tks for reaching out for help. All the best to you. :flowerforyou:

He could get prison time for it , means he is eighteen and she is 15. I hope she understands that if she is not being honest this will effect him the rest of his life. On the other hand if she is telling the truth, he should be reported and known as a sex offender. My heart and prayers go out to her.