Unsupportive Sister

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TexasTallchick
TexasTallchick Posts: 133 Member
in Motivation and Support
Every time I mention MFP my sister rolls her eyes. She said it’s ‘junk science.’ She’s never used it in her life. She’s losing weight by eating very little and walking 20K steps a day and gets mad when I don’t want to eat something because I don’t know the macros. I moved to live by her after I lost my husband and it sucks that she can’t be supportive. I’ve been losing steadily since I started using it again. How do you handle someone close who isn’t supportive? She wants me to lose weight, so I don’t understand why she’s being this way.
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Replies

  • Silkysausage
    Silkysausage Posts: 502 Member
    edited March 2019
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    Don't worry about what she thinks, let her do it her own way. Some people will never see reason and you'll be driving yourselves apart if you both carry on.

    As Tavistock said above, refrain from diet discussion and you'll have a happier relationship.
  • missysippy930
    missysippy930 Posts: 2,577 Member
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    Tell her she’s losing weight the same way you are, “eating less calories than her body burns.” No matter what it’s called, or how it’s packaged, that’s the way weight is lost. You can pay money and have someone tell you what to eat, or you can learn to do it yourself.
  • cmriverside
    cmriverside Posts: 33,960 Member
    edited March 2019
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    Weight loss and "diet" are two of those things that are best not discussed if you have the mindset of conversion, unless you like conflict.

    It's a lot like religion and politics in that way.

    I avoid contentious topics with family. It's just easier and this one isn't something that needs a lot of discussion. Your sis is entitled to her opinion, so you can agree to disagree. I think the expectation of "support" may be a reach in this case. You two disagree. That's okay. :)
  • Machka9
    Machka9 Posts: 24,869 Member
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    TavistockToad wrote: »
    Stop talking about your diet/weight loss with your sister
    jennifer_417 wrote: »
    Don't bring it up. Let the results speak for themselves.

    These!

    Don't talk about it ... just do it.


    And if you're an adult, you can choose what you want to eat or not eat. I don't like mushrooms so I choose not to eat them. My husband doesn't like peas so he chooses not to eat them. It's all OK.
  • 88olds
    88olds Posts: 4,466 Member
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    Maybe find another way to be with your sister. I found weight loss to be a solitary pursuit.

    And it’s just a topic where it seems everyone, I mean everyone, has opinions. And stand ready to share those opinions, often stated in terms of what you should do.
  • thanos5
    thanos5 Posts: 513 Member
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    how is counting calories junk science? it's just math. whatever. this is exactly why i don't reveal any details to people.
  • suzannesimmons1
    suzannesimmons1 Posts: 58 Member
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    TavistockToad wrote: »
    Stop talking about your diet/weight loss with your sister

    This. To be fair she may not give a hoot.
  • kbmnurse1
    kbmnurse1 Posts: 316 Member
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    STOP talking about it. Pretty simple.
  • RelCanonical
    RelCanonical Posts: 3,882 Member
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    You don't need her. I had to stop talking to my mom about weight loss, and she was very supportive in the past, because my aunt keeps trying to get her into fad diets and she's starting to buy into it because she's getting frustrated. I couldn't take it anymore after she said "I'll try what you do if you manage to keep it off." Like, I know she didn't mean to say that she expected me to fail, but it just tipped me off that I need to stop talking about it with her because I'm not going to get what I want out of the conversation.
  • BZAH10
    BZAH10 Posts: 5,709 Member
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    mgobluetx wrote: »
    Every time I mention MFP my sister rolls her eyes. She said it’s ‘junk science.’ She’s never used it in her life. She’s losing weight by eating very little and walking 20K steps a day and gets mad when I don’t want to eat something because I don’t know the macros. I moved to live by her after I lost my husband and it sucks that she can’t be supportive. I’ve been losing steadily since I started using it again. How do you handle someone close who isn’t supportive? She wants me to lose weight, so I don’t understand why she’s being this way.

    Well, this isn't sustainable so when this back fires on her she may be more open to counting calories on MFP but until then she'll just have to figure it out herself.
  • shetland
    shetland Posts: 55 Member
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    I just wanted to add that I am so sorry for the loss of your husband
  • MikePTY
    MikePTY Posts: 3,814 Member
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    mgobluetx wrote: »
    Every time I mention MFP my sister rolls her eyes. She said it’s ‘junk science.’ She’s never used it in her life. She’s losing weight by eating very little and walking 20K steps a day and gets mad when I don’t want to eat something because I don’t know the macros. I moved to live by her after I lost my husband and it sucks that she can’t be supportive. I’ve been losing steadily since I started using it again. How do you handle someone close who isn’t supportive? She wants me to lose weight, so I don’t understand why she’s being this way.

    I keep coming back to this line in your post. Can you explain a little more about what you mean by this? Are you saying that you will refuse to eat anything unless you know the exact macros ahead of time? That isn't necessary for weight loss and may be a bit obsessive. Is it possible that this is what she is objecting to as "junk science" and not calorie counting/using MFP in general?

    We are only hearing one side of the story here, and it's possible your sister may have another perspective that is coming at it from what she thinks is your best interest. Have you two ever tried to talk at length about this?
  • theowlbox
    theowlbox Posts: 912 Member
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    is she a sister who thinks she knows everything? if she is used to bossing you around, it won't be just mfp she is unsupportive about.

    i moved near a sister then realized she could not hold back on being a bossy nutbar. i moved away and it has really helped me to have a life where i am not put in my little sister role at 40 and where we can have a healthy relationship. it was because of the distance that i could tell her things and change how we interact.
    is it possible that she is more protective of you since your husband's death and she doesn't know about mfp but is being a know it all?

    if she is a good sister, she may just be being crappy with good intentions. if she is a bad sister escape immediately and snip her out like cancer.

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