How long until I stop being obsessed with food??

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A few years ago I was in a similar position to where you are now. I had a sort of rebound once I stop over-exercising and restricting where I basically binged for maybe two or three months straight without engaging in compensatory behaviors (purging, restricting the next day, exercising.) I basically just just ate whatever I wanted, whenever I wanted and however much I wanted, to the point of being sick sometimes. It was mental hell, but I think my body was so stressed out and deprived of so many nutrients and so much energy, along with just having denied myself every single food I love for so long that it just had to be that way. But after those two or theee months I felt ready to start exercising again, doing like half of what I had been doing for so long which I felt was sustainable. And I started trying to go back to eating what I considered “healthy,” but still didn’t make room for my favorites foods on a regular basis and I sort of got stuck in that same pattern a few times, eventually ending up 50-60 lbs heavier than my ideal weight. I started tracking my food about 2 years ago. When I first started I was still sticking to a strict “good food vs bad food” mindset, and was binging more often than I could handle. So it’s only been in the last year or so that I worked up the courage to eat the foods I love on a daily basis. Everyone on here (the smart people) emphasizes that you can literally eat whatever you want and lose weight as long as you’re in a calorie deficit, so I decided to test it. It was scary, junk food is so demonized by the diet industry, but I jumped in and I assure you it is 1000% true. I eat Cheetos, popcorn, chips, candy, ice cream, pizza and so much more every single day but most days eat within my calories. I adjust serving sizes to fit them in along with more nutritious foods. It sounds like you’re in the “rebound” phase I was in the first time. Thinking about it now, the thing I wish I had done differently at that point was to eat at maintenance, allowing any food I wanted, but I’m not sure I would have had that self-control after what I had put myself through mentally and physically for so long. Just know that where you are now is hard, it’s harder than hard, but I’ve been there and so have many, many others on here. It will probably be one of the hardest things you will ever have to do, but getting better is possible. And remember that when it comes to disordered eating “better” looks different for each individual. Every day for me is different. Sometimes doing well means saying f&$@ the calories, I’m blowing past my calories every day this weekend (hello yesterday and Friday), and being able to gradually return to maintenance calories and then a small deficit, since my current goal is to lose a few more vanity pounds. I’m very very close to my goal weight, which is the lower middle healthy range for my BMI (I like a good buffer since I’ve dealt with such big weight fluctuations.) I wish you the best, I know for a fact you can do it. Restricting to the point of an underweight BMI requires insane determination, which you’ve proven you have. Now just refocus that determination on building healthy habits. A professional might be able to help you identify what healthy habits look like for you at this point in your journey. Your perspective on what a healthy habit is could be somewhat skewed just since you’ve been caught in this restrictive mindset for so long, so an objective opinion might help you. If you have any questions feel free to send me a message.

It appears that the original poster, lydslaura, has dectivated/ left the site.

cmriverside wrote: »

It appears that the original poster, lydslaura, has dectivated/ left the site.

I’m always hopeful that not only the OP but others who are struggling with similar issues may be benefiting from the courage the OP had in posting the question and the responses that follow.