Realisation over my old weight

I thought about it because it didn't seem right to me...Didn't ring true for me. It wasn't.

My lowest weight was 96 lbs.
I remember being under 70lbs and saying I had to stay under. I just had to.
I wasn't even 8 y/o.
I remember seeing I was almost 100 lbs. I was 96.
I wasn't yet 10 y/o.

That was the first really legitimate time I had issues with my body and ate less to get smaller/maintain. I have been unknowingly struggling with anorexia since I was 9 years old.
10 almost 11 years. No wonder I think life is pointless-not to be depressing-. 10 years of attempting to lose weight or end myself...Geezus! At least I know my real Lowest weight!

I'm not interested in getting back to double digits but I would like not to see the second number anything higher than a 2.



**Also not suicidal, just kind of wandering.