Creative ways to keep me out of the dog house?

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24

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  • TluvK
    TluvK Posts: 733 Member
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    Hey - these calendar ideas are really great. I'm not a very organized person, which is why my brain feels full all the time. :laugh:
  • Sagelit
    Sagelit Posts: 78
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    Honey you don't need anything creative, you need to listen to your husband and make it a priority to remember. You are hurting his feelings big time. Your kids are important, but they will grow up and leave you. If you want him around when they are gone, pay attention to him

    I agree with this poster as well. 4 days a week of "stuff" doesn't make up for not being involved in anything else in his life :/
  • mikethom
    mikethom Posts: 183 Member
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    You have selective hearing. I suffer from the same problem. He's an attention *kitten*. Ignore him more.

    I was thinking the same thing! Although I might not have put it so bluntly :laugh:
  • RollinDawg
    RollinDawg Posts: 235 Member
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    When he gets home, 2 words: Naked and BEER. He won't remember if he was mad at all. Oh, and send the kids and dog outside so it won't be all weird and stuff.
  • Jennyisbusy
    Jennyisbusy Posts: 1,294 Member
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    Uh huh..


    Have you seen the remote?

    **chuckle**
  • jamiesgotagun
    jamiesgotagun Posts: 670 Member
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    sounds like a steak and bj night, he will forget all about it ;)
  • Skeith5
    Skeith5 Posts: 89 Member
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    My wife and I have a shared google calendar that we use to keep track of what's important. Since we both have android phones they show up on our phones. Makes it impossible to forget stuff!

    Scott
  • ladybug1620
    ladybug1620 Posts: 1,136 Member
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    Honey you don't need anything creative, you need to listen to your husband and make it a priority to remember. You are hurting his feelings big time. Your kids are important, but they will grow up and leave you. If you want him around when they are gone, pay attention to him

    We have a REALLY good relationship...and he gets plenty of attention - to the tune of 4 days a week, if you know what I mean.
    I'm sorry to say this, but is "4 days a week" everything that your relationship is to YOU? Probably not. So it's most likely not everything to your husband either. I really can't see how you can forget things so important to him. My husband would be extremely hurt as well. I have 2 kids, 2 dogs, work full time, long commute, etc. and I can manage to pay attention to my husband besides in the sack. I agree with the calendar ideas, maybe just a little oranization will go a long way. Also maybe set aside one day a week (after the kids are in bed so there's no distractions) to get together on the upcoming week and what you both have going on.
  • summertime_girl
    summertime_girl Posts: 3,945 Member
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    I also have two kids, work from home, and on top of that, am working through a masters degree, and have horses to care for. I honestly couldn't function without my iphone and calendar. I have color-coded family calendars (on top of work and school calendars) and each person has a color. The calendars sync out to my husband's and kids' phones and computers, and everyone can keep track of each other that way. I would die without modern technology.
  • bethrs
    bethrs Posts: 664 Member
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    All of this, AND- tell him you have a crappy memory but it DOESN't mean that you don't love him or that he's not important. As a therapist, I can say that this is less about who remembers what, but it IS about how he interprets your forgetting/not listening, the meaning he makes out of it and how it makes him feel.

    Don't make excuses but help him see that this is not a reflection of your feelings for him, it's a reflection of a weakness/difference in personality. Unless that's not true, and if that's the case, you have more to talk about than steaks and beer.
  • TluvK
    TluvK Posts: 733 Member
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    Honey you don't need anything creative, you need to listen to your husband and make it a priority to remember. You are hurting his feelings big time. Your kids are important, but they will grow up and leave you. If you want him around when they are gone, pay attention to him

    I agree with this poster as well. 4 days a week of "stuff" doesn't make up for not being involved in anything else in his life :/

    Whoa Whoa Whoa, slow down there sister. Not sure you can wean just from my post that I'm not involved in anything else in my husband's life. Sheesh!
  • Bubdog1
    Bubdog1 Posts: 72
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    Is he on Facebook, Twitter or MySpace? If so, go on those sites and see if he posted anything about his day's activities so far. It may jog your memory. Or, chat up one of his friends and see if they mention anything!
  • redfroggie
    redfroggie Posts: 591 Member
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    Isn't this under chit-chat, fun and games? I thought it was a bit tongue in cheek. Maybe I'm wrong?
  • TluvK
    TluvK Posts: 733 Member
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    All of this, AND- tell him you have a crappy memory but it DOESN't mean that you don't love him or that he's not important. As a therapist, I can say that this is less about who remembers what, but it IS about how he interprets your forgetting/not listening, the meaning he makes out of it and how it makes him feel.

    Don't make excuses but help him see that this is not a reflection of your feelings for him, it's a reflection of a weakness/difference in personality. Unless that's not true, and if that's the case, you have more to talk about than steaks and beer.

    This, This, This. Thank you Dr. Love!
  • TluvK
    TluvK Posts: 733 Member
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    Isn't this under chit-chat, fun and games? I thought it was a bit tongue in cheek. Maybe I'm wrong?

    Yeah, I wasn't really looking for a spanking. Spanking....that could work...
  • ering
    ering Posts: 183 Member
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    I have a big dry erase board on the wall in our den. I write everything on it otherwise I would forget things. Then we all can remember what eachother is doing.
    Maybe that could help you too?

    I need to add, we have 5 kids and a dog. :) So if I can do it you can too!! Good Luck!
  • redfroggie
    redfroggie Posts: 591 Member
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    Isn't this under chit-chat, fun and games? I thought it was a bit tongue in cheek. Maybe I'm wrong?

    Yeah, I wasn't really looking for a spanking. Spanking....that could work...

    Ohh yeah you could be on to something...:)
  • Sasssy69
    Sasssy69 Posts: 547 Member
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    I see some of the replies implying you are a bad wife. I do not agree. How much does your husband help you with the kids and the house? When life gets chaotic and the wife is left to do EVERYTHING and the husband picks the WORST times to tell the wife stuff (She's doing laundry, getting dinner ready, and supervising the kids) it's hard to pay attention.

    My man and I have an agreement - when something is important to us, we make SURE we tell the other when we know we are listening. For example, I'll say, "I have something important to tell you. Is this a good time?" And he lets me know.

    I forget stuff all the time. So does my significant other. My feelings don't get hurt and neither do his. We both realize that life gets busy and we're HUMAN.

    Tell him you forgot, and perhaps set up a way to tell each other the important stuff. Then write it down if you need to. Tell him you love him and you're sorry, but a little help around the house (assuming my hunch is right) might be to his benefit. But don't beat yourself up, and certainly don't let anyone else. Only YOU know what your marriage is like. Believe me, people love to judge a marriage...but no one knows what truly goes on behind closed doors.
  • TluvK
    TluvK Posts: 733 Member
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    I see some of the replies implying you are a bad wife. I do not agree. How much does your husband help you with the kids and the house? When life gets chaotic and the wife is left to do EVERYTHING and the husband picks the WORST times to tell the wife stuff (She's doing laundry, getting dinner ready, and supervising the kids) it's hard to pay attention.

    My man and I have an agreement - when something is important to us, we make SURE we tell the other when we know we are listening. For example, I'll say, "I have something important to tell you. Is this a good time?" And he lets me know.

    I forget stuff all the time. So does my significant other. My feelings don't get hurt and neither do his. We both realize that life gets busy and we're HUMAN.

    Tell him you forgot, and perhaps set up a way to tell each other the important stuff. Then write it down if you need to. Tell him you love him and you're sorry, but a little help around the house (assuming my hunch is right) might be to his benefit. But don't beat yourself up, and certainly don't let anyone else. Only YOU know what your marriage is like. Believe me, people love to judge a marriage...but no one knows what truly goes on behind closed doors.
    Not only are you wise and full of common sense, but you are spot-on. I am actually very proud of my relationship. I like the attention-getting idea. I'll work on this. That and spanking is going to fix this right quick!
  • liftingbro
    liftingbro Posts: 2,029 Member
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    If he's a man this should work:

    Make steak, serve him beer in his chair with football on. After the game, do what he wants in the bedroom and them make him a sammich.

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