Hopeless

Options
I feel like I have been trying to diet for so long, and I can't seem to succeed. I feel like I can succeed at just about anything but this, and it seems like it would be the easiest thing to achieve! I'm at the end of my ropes, and I really hate myself and need some encouragement. How do you start over time and time again and actually stick to your plan? What do you guys do?

Replies

  • Courtneymartinez
    Options
    I am always restarting and it can get discouraging, but you have to hang in there and keep going!! It takes time but you will see that each time you are at a better spot than the last. Don't give up!
  • myfriendamy
    myfriendamy Posts: 131 Member
    Options
    hang in there - you CAN do this! baby steps... change one thing at a time. its been said a million times before, but it's worth repeating - getting healthy and fit isn't a diet, it's a whole lifestyle change.

    figure out why you've "failed" before, and work with that. if you can't deal with food restrictions (ie. no sweets/carbs/whatever AT ALL) then don't do that. allow yourself some indulgences in moderation. budget yourself the brownie you want, or the garlic bread... whatever it is you would feel cheated of.

    and really, baby steps. commit to one healthy meal a day for a week. or one lap around you parking lot this week. set yourself up to succeed! then up it the next week... you can do this - but going "balls out" day 1 doesn't work for everyone. :)
  • kathleennf
    kathleennf Posts: 606 Member
    Options
    Hi!
    Well for me the hardest thing has always been making the decision. I am a strong-willed person and if I decide in advance that I am going to do something, whether it is something as small as getting up on time tomorrow (I have to decide the night before though HAHA) or really sticking to my diet then I will do it. The big problem I have is if I don't decide. I have also struggled with my diet basically since I was a teen, and the times I have won (like now) have been when I got mad at myself (so to speak) and really made up my mind to do it.

    What helps me a lot specifically on MFP is logging stuff in advance and playing around with it. I have decided to really stick to the calorie limit so I lot of time I put in what I plan to eat for dinner, then figure out what I have left to eat for lunch. And if the dinner doesn't fit, then I change it around to make it fit!
  • Ruchell
    Ruchell Posts: 236 Member
    Options
    I wish I had better advice, but you truly just have to do it, make it a mindset and a lifestyle! You have to know yourself...some people are going to do better with small, gradual changes and some do better overhauling everything and changing all at once. Maybe open your diary so we can see the foods you're eating and giving us some idea of what you've been trying to we can give you better tips and ideas?

    Believe me, everyone on here would probably tell you that this is one of the hardest things we've all ever done...but if I can lose weight, anyone can! It's not hopeless...
  • FASTBALL1539
    Options
    The hardest thing to do is get started. But after a few weeks and with the help of the message board and friends it almost becomes an obsession. haha. Try making your dieting and workouts a daily routine. This give you the oppurtunity to eat around the same time and work out every day. It makes it a lot easier to plan your life around your diet instead of the other way around! Hope this helps!!!!!
  • TiffanyA2008
    Options
    I feel like I have been trying to diet for so long, and I can't seem to succeed. I feel like I can succeed at just about anything but this, and it seems like it would be the easiest thing to achieve! I'm at the end of my ropes, and I really hate myself and need some encouragement. How do you start over time and time again and actually stick to your plan? What do you guys do?

    First off, you definitely have to change your mind set. Stop with the negativity because that isn't going to get you anywhere. Negative thoughts out, positive thoughts in. Instead of saying things like, "I'm at the end of my ropes, and I really hate myself......" say things that are positive and embed those thoughts into your brain. Tell yourself, "This is the beginning of a wonderful journey. I am strong and I can do this." Yes, there will be hard times and some days where you do want to give up, but that's when you have to push yourself even harder!

    YOU CAN DO THIS!! HAVE MORE FAITH IN YOURSELF!!
  • lublin1987
    Options
    Take small steps, don't get discouraged easily, think positive.It is very hard I know but you can do it ,we all can do it if we put our mind into it. Don't think about bad days focus only on good and I'm sure you will see the results. Good luck, add me if you want and we can support each other.
  • world2c
    world2c Posts: 178 Member
    Options
    I have two motivators- one- I'm trying to get down to a better weight.... my other, signing up for a 5K series pack - yep, when you're committed to do 7, it sort of keeps you on the straight and narrow.... Plus, I have to say that I have amazing supporters- lots of girls at work joined this with me, and we also do 5K's together. I think like with anything you want to acheive, you must decide, what is your final goal - is it to be a certain weight, fit into pants you wore x years, ago, complete a triathlon (that's what mine was and at 217, I did my first)?? Then you have decide how you're going to get there.... Take your total amount you want to loose and divide it up into smaller sections so that you have only to reach 5 or 10 pounds.... And work on that, instead of trying to tackle the whole beast at once. And don't deprive yourself of the foods that you want- just eat them in smaller quantitites.... I've found that works best for me... It's a journey, not an overnight practice - no team goes straight to the playoffs just by deciding that they want to.... They have to put in time, effort and a full season of battles just to get to them.... Remember one day at a time, and also remember failing is not bad, it's what you do afterwards that matters. So, here's your hand up, dust yourself off and try it again... You can do it!!!
  • meerkat70
    meerkat70 Posts: 4,616 Member
    Options
    You need to make a decision. Not just a decision to get on a diet - that's the easy bit. It's a decision that you do not *have* to be fat. Well, that's what it took for me, anyway. At a point I can very clearly remember, I resigned myself to being a big person - I allowed myself to be convinced that fat was simply what I was meant to be. Changing your mind about that is a huge psychological shift. But for me, it was absolutely essential. I can now envision myself as a slim, healthy person. And while I've stopped along my journey, and even gained a bit back along the way, I know there is no way I will ever go back to that person who feels they are doomed to be big.
  • MelissaL582
    MelissaL582 Posts: 1,422 Member
    Options
    I wish I had better advice, but you truly just have to do it, make it a mindset and a lifestyle! You have to know yourself...some people are going to do better with small, gradual changes and some do better overhauling everything and changing all at once. Maybe open your diary so we can see the foods you're eating and giving us some idea of what you've been trying to we can give you better tips and ideas?

    Believe me, everyone on here would probably tell you that this is one of the hardest things we've all ever done...but if I can lose weight, anyone can! It's not hopeless...

    Couldn't have said it any better. I thought having 3 kid was tough, but losing weight and making this a lifestyle change has been a real challenge. I had to stop "dreaming" of how I wanted to look like and just do it! No more dreaming or wishing.
  • Katbaran
    Katbaran Posts: 605 Member
    Options
    As long as you are alive there is hope! I second what everybody else said. When I started out I was afraid I would turn into one of those women so huge that I would have to hauled out of my house by taking a wall out and it would take 12 fire fighters and a crane.
    Just sit down with no distractions and make a plan. Positive self-talk is essential. Go from thinking you are hopeless to HOPEFUL! You CAN do this. You CAN make good food choices. You CAN help yourself. You ARE strong. You are in CONTROL. Repeat as necessary. Over and over all day long until it becomes automatic.

    Good luck and I wish you many pounds lost!
  • bregalad5
    bregalad5 Posts: 3,965 Member
    Options
    Honestly? I had someone piss me off. I'm very stubborn, and I hate not being able to get what I want, so right now my motivation is to prove this person wrong (such a woman thing, I know :P ). This has been something I've wanted to do for a while, and I've done a lot on my own to get to where I was before joining here this past week, but that was the extra spark that I needed to push myself extra hard to really lose weight.

    You've come to the right place, though. Poke around, make some friends, maybe join a group, and you'll find it's much easier to lose when you have that support system in place :)

    Good luck to you!
  • stroken96
    stroken96 Posts: 436 Member
    Options
    I try and give myself a free day (maybe once a month) when I feel I'm stressed about what I need to eat. Labor day weekend I will be camping and have a free weekend but I know that I will watch what I eat and drink. lost and don't want it back
  • terfywashere
    Options
    I decided to change my eating habits when I was an overweight teen. The best thing that helped and still helps me is to consistently track my calories. First, I set a reasonable weight loss goal and make myself write down the calories of everything I eat so I know when to stop. I can find the calories to almost any food if I Google it. It took persistence and determination to change my eating habits. I had to make myself do it and tell others to help me do it. I also do a eating routine that I can be happy with. If I'm miserable with what I'm eating I know will stray. Eating breakfast keeps me from feeling like I'm starving at the end of the day too. It wasn't easy changing my eating habits, but once I did it it became a way of life and I stuck with it. I taught myself to eat better. Then I began an exercise routine, it was a light one at first, then I made it tougher when I was ready to be challenged.

    Other things that help me: I eat foods that take more energy to digest like high protein foods complimented with veggies. I avoid sugar as much as possible, but I do eat it in moderation. I stopped considering ice cream and brownies as a meal.

    I hope you find what works for you. Don't give up! This site is full of helpful info and people ;)