Rude Adoption Comment

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Replies

  • mattig89ch
    mattig89ch Posts: 2,648 Member
    This may me my NY side coming out, but why didn't you tell her to *kitten* off?
  • doingthisforme16
    doingthisforme16 Posts: 36 Member
    My wife and I adopted an orphaned child from Russia when we were in our mid 30's.

    We heard a number of comments about our adoption; most were great, some hurt.

    Just know that you did a right and noble thing by adopting and helping a child.

    Seems everyone has an opinion. Best to consider the source and let their comments wash off of you like rain from a duck's back.
  • toreybybee
    toreybybee Posts: 6 Member
    Your child doesn't care how old you are, they care that they are loved. Maybe your SIL didn't think before she spoke... Or maybe she is intimidated by your initiative and passion to do something so life changing and great.
  • isalsayourface123
    isalsayourface123 Posts: 2,153 Member
    deputy_randolph wrote: »
    I would just tell anyone that made that kind of comment again: "It's better to have old parents than no parents." That should shut down further comments.

    I'm not sure her comment was as rude as it was ignorant.

    Or...I didnt realize love had an expiration date
  • InkgirlKC
    InkgirlKC Posts: 251 Member
    ready2lose2101 wrote: »
    So my hubby and I adopted an infant in our early 40's. We realized we couldn't have kids naturally and decided to adopt. During a recent visit to my sister-in-law's house, she not to kindly said that she can't understand what we were thinking because we are "OLD". The balls on some people!!! I realize that we are not spring chickens but our daughter is now 9 and has all of the love and attention she may ever want. We are both healthy and plan to live a good long while. My SIL makes it seem as if we have one foot in the grave or something. I have friends with kids the same age and they aren't but a year or 2 younger than us.

    I shouldn't have to explain myself to her or anyone and I didn't comment on her rudeness but her comment has been festering in my soul for the past week and I get angry when I think about it.

    Sorry to vent, I just can't fathom why people can't keep their rude comments to themselves especially when they're so hurtful. Let's just say I won't may a huge effort to visit their house again.

    She waited nine years to make a comment about it? What triggered it?
  • ready2lose2101
    ready2lose2101 Posts: 47 Member
    She’s very opionated and I’m sure she’s always felt this way about our adoption and probably believed the time was right for her to say something.

    Keep in mind that she’s a nice person but will initiate small fires within the family and pretend innocence when everything comes to a head. Her comments still hurt because I’ve been taught not to say anything at all if I don’t have anything nice to say. This should hold true especially when dealing with family.
  • LyndaBSS
    LyndaBSS Posts: 6,964 Member
    ready2lose2101 wrote: »
    She’s very opionated and I’m sure she’s always felt this way about our adoption and probably believed the time was right for her to say something.

    Keep in mind that she’s a nice person but will initiate small fires within the family and pretend innocence when everything comes to a head. Her comments still hurt because I’ve been taught not to say anything at all if I don’t have anything nice to say. This should hold true especially when dealing with family.

    I feel sorry for her.

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