We broke up because...
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I couldn't understand Dutch and he couldn't understand Australian
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She gave me pink eye.0
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He was too much princess for me0
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She tried to steal my princess nipples as I slept.0
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He never took me to the movies. Said he was banned due to a “misunderstanding”0
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Her heart belongs to someone else😟0
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His wife didn't like me0
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You love her, but she loves him... and he loves somebody else. You just can't win.0
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For her birthday gift, she asked me to get a vasectomy0
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He went to jail and fell in love there0
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She was cross eyed and I couldn't tell if she was looking at me or someone else.0
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He didn't like to share his sweets0
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He was too sweet. I was worried he’d rot my teeth out.0
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We couldn't find a neutral place to live together!0
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I have a cat allergy.... the cats were chosen over me.0
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She didn't want to be my sugar momma0
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He had a wandering eye0
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She would always pee in the shower. Ewe gross.0
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He always used my razor in the shower, but would never clean it out.0
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She had a house rule that i could talk to her as long as i was also rubbing her feet at the same time0
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