Life change

Being fat sucks. My body has no energy to do anything anymore. Its slowly deteriorating too. My knee is giving me issues, my lower back aches all the time. My heart is having problems too. Emotional stress doesn't help but physical stress (or lack thereof) definitely doesn't help. Something needs to be done. I can't rely on meds to save me. I can't rely on surgeries. I can't rely on food. I have to find a reason deep down to make the changes. I would think my wife would be enough. I would think my kids would be enough. I would think being healthy would be enough but something's missing. Something doesn't connect. I need all of the above to matter. I can start today, I will never be able to stop. I will always have temptations but what will I do with them? Will I give in? Will I use them to motivate myself? Will I rely on others? Myself? God?.... I hope I figure it out. I'm starting my journey today. Today is the beginning, the end is the day I die. What will I make of myself. How will I loose the weight? Let's find out! Go Jed!