We broke up because...
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Insisted on me doing the downward dog every single night!0
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You threw a snowball at me and broke my front teeth0
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Pushed me off the swings and ran away0
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she took up a job as the receptionist at a nudist colony0
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Nudity offended him. He even showered fully clothed!0
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We parted ways bc they were made out of paper and not plastic0
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Her fur made me itch1
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He kept talking about his ex0
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She tried to poison me with some broccoli, I hate broccoli.0
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He didn't like cheese on his broccoli0
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She farted in her sleep.0
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He pooped the bed0
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She kept scratching her butt on my rug like a dog.0
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He kept making snort sounds like a pig0
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She told her friend about our bedroom activity and now she is calling me non stop0
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He dreams too much0
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When she laughed juice would come out of her nose. So disgusting..1
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When he laughed he would shart himself0
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He always eats bacon...nothing else0
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