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We Broke Up Because....... part 2 .....
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She wouldn't play with my "collectors item"0
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Caught in the hot tub with the neighbour0
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Got water everywhere on my bathroom floor0
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He ate all his meals in the bathroom. Even in restaurants.0
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Her cooking was so bad I only ate in restaurants0
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Was always bringing me home Big Macs0
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She said water aerobics is a workout for senior citizens and i should choose a more manly form of exercise0
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Was always hitting on the Senior Citizens😝0
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Wasn't old enough to get SSI checks0
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He was a gold digger0
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Not only was it those chicken legs, but I always felt like I was going to be pecked whenever she started clucking 🐔0
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Kept clucking my friends behind my back 😔0
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He spent waaayyy too much time with his cluckers.0
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She didn't understand my need to cluck0
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He crawled everywhere he went. wouldnt get up and walk0
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He didnt like seeing me on all fours0
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He asked me to buy him a collar and leader, but I didn't want a pet
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Wouldnt take me to the New Castle Brewery0
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He wanted to live in a castle in thought that a little too pretentious0
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She stopped wanting to bake with me.0
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She kept going to the neighbor’s house to feed him cupcakes every night.1
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my mistress was feeding me cupcakes every night0
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He made me eat cupcake crumbs off the floor0
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He like mud more than me....0
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I mixed him a drink and tried to surprise him and he spit it out. We were done after that ;(0
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Said I wasn't allowed taco Bell anymore0
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Cause every time he ate Taco Bell is have to sleep on the couch0
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She ordered bean burritos so had to sleep on couch0
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She texted her therapist “Help me get through this” during our honeymoon0
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