About to joing a gym to tackle my obesity and become healthy

zuzanao
zuzanao Posts: 28 Member
edited December 23 in Health and Weight Loss
Hi there,so I have decided to join a gym to help me to get fit and be healthy.I plan to do weigh training and cardio classes as thats what I found keeps me motivated.I know it will be hard and I fear of how I will be 'accepted' in the gym.I dnt want anyone to stare at me,I hate being the centre of attention
any advice for a newbie at the gym to help with self confidence once there?thanks

Replies

  • zuzanao
    zuzanao Posts: 28 Member
    Thank youbfor your encouragement.
  • manderson27
    manderson27 Posts: 3,510 Member
    Kudos to you for wanting to get fitter and healthier. I have been going to the gym on and off for years more off than on though due to health issues. But I soon got over my embarrasment as I found people were either helpful or ignored me. Most people are just there for themselves you will barely register on them. So hold your head up, be proud that you are doing something important for yourself, work hard and you will soon reap the benefits and after a few weeks you will wonder why you were worried about it. If your gym has a pool swimming is very beneficial and feels fantastic after a hard work out.

    You haven't mentioned your diet at all, but you will find MFP is a great tool to help you with that. Lots of information and help available on here.

    Good luck.
  • Justin_7272
    Justin_7272 Posts: 341 Member
    Many people there probably feel the same; it's common. If you're comfortable making small talk you'll probably find a lot of similar-feeling people. If not, no big deal.

    Most people there with knowledge will probably be happy to help you if you're not familiar with a piece of equipment or want advice on lift form. In general experienced gym people like sharing their knowledge. You might come across people that are rude or judgmental, but if you're going to a decent gym that shouldn't be the norm.

    At the end of the day you're there for you, but don't be afraid to make friends.
  • kshama2001
    kshama2001 Posts: 28,052 Member
    zuzanao wrote: »
    Hi there,so I have decided to join a gym to help me to get fit and be healthy.I plan to do weigh training and cardio classes as thats what I found keeps me motivated.I know it will be hard and I fear of how I will be 'accepted' in the gym.I dnt want anyone to stare at me,I hate being the centre of attention
    any advice for a newbie at the gym to help with self confidence once there?thanks

    Every gym I've ever joined gave me 1-3 sessions with a personal trainer free with membership. This is a good way to start getting comfortable in a facility.

    Also, I have some social anxiety and preferred to go at off-peak times. As far as I'm concerned, the less other people, the better.

    For classes, you could of course stay in the back.
  • peggy_polenta
    peggy_polenta Posts: 325 Member
    trust me. no one is looking at your or cares about you. everyone is in there doing their own thing and most are regular people just like you and me. seriously, no one cares.
  • ridiculous59
    ridiculous59 Posts: 2,911 Member
    AnnPT77 wrote: »
    I've been going to my gym (YMCA) starting long before I lost weight, and I was not only obese, but also post-bilateral-mastectomy (without either reconstruction or prostheses, so completely flat up top). Even in a swimsuit, where both the fat and the flat were very obvious, I never felt like I was given any different attention than anyone else, either in classes or solo workouts.

    Most of the time, the "standard level of attention" is that people will maybe say "hi" if you pass close by in the hall and eyes meet, and in classes the instructors often talk to new people to get them started and occasionally introduce them to the class.

    At my Y location, there are all ages (babies and toddlers at tot-watch to people in their 80s at least), many races, many nationalities (not unusual to hear Spanish, Korean, and other languages spoken), hijabi women, biker-dudes with lots of tattoos, people of all weights, developmentally-challenged people with personal aides, disabled people using assistive devices, and lately there's been a fit-looking little person who's probably 60 playing racketball with the other guys. Very diverse. I regularly see obese people in the cardio machine area or locker room or pool (some of them visibly shrinking over the months ;) ), clearly working on getting fitter and healthier, and no one pays them any special attention that I can see.

    There isn't a lot of conversation, except between people who are friends, beyond just casual pleasantries if someone's using a close locker or something like that.

    I know it seems really daunting at first, but keep in mind that everyone was new once, and a bunch of the people who look fit now weren't always that way themselves. Most people are too self-absorbed to pay any attention to us.

    I've used the gym at my municipal rec centre for years and this is pretty much how it is there too (I was obese when I started). I find that most people are too busy counting reps, checking their phones, or listening to music/podcasts to notice you, other than to maybe say hi. There's no small talk happening. Most people just want to get their workout done and carry on with the rest of their day or evening.

    If you can get a staff member to walk you through the equipment (probably for a fee), its well worth it. It will make things a little less intimidating, until you get comfortable in your new surroundings. I tried different classes and found that my favourite one when I was obese was deep water running. No pressure on my joints and you can make the class as difficult or as easy as you like.

    Congratulations on starting this new adventure!! :)

  • nighthawk584
    nighthawk584 Posts: 2,024 Member
    as others have said, nobody will even notice and if they do, MOST of them will applaud you for being there and starting your health journey!
  • Go_Deskercise
    Go_Deskercise Posts: 1,630 Member
    edited November 2019
    @zuzanao Don't forget to come back and let us know how the gym is going!!!


    Edit: When I went to the gym, I looked around but I was literally just looking threw everyone at nothing in particular trying to get through my cardio on the treadmill usually.
  • Whydahdad71
    Whydahdad71 Posts: 319 Member
    Nobody is going to judge you at all...planet fitness just says that to drum up business.
    Do your thing and have fun! God bless and go get em!!
  • Ws2016
    Ws2016 Posts: 432 Member
    Most people in gyms were at one point out of shape. Get to know people. If you see someone doing an exercise you don’t understand, ask them about it. You’ll be surprised how friendly prople will be. You can also get a trainer for a few months.
  • MelanieCN77
    MelanieCN77 Posts: 4,047 Member
    Aside: who hits disagree on this kind of post?
  • PAV8888
    PAV8888 Posts: 14,312 Member
    People who thought that all gym patrons are friendly, welcoming, and non judgemental but didn't bother to write it due to an over-abundance of the friendly welcome non-judgmental attribute!!!!
  • HotFrieZ
    HotFrieZ Posts: 35 Member
    First of all, good for you, that's awesome. When I used to go to the gym, I never really thought twice about other people and what they were doing. If anything, I'd think people would think "good for you for starting on your fitness journey.". If not they're *kitten* who need a life lol.
  • jennifer_417
    jennifer_417 Posts: 12,344 Member
    I wish I could guarantee that too won't run into any jerks, but I can't.

    Having said that, though, they're not all that common.

    The best thing you can do is go in with your head held high. You paid the fees just like everyone else, you have just as much right to be there.

    Also, go in with a plan. It'll help a lot to have at least an idea of what you're going to do, and how to do it.
  • DiscusTank5
    DiscusTank5 Posts: 503 Member
    I was once intimidated by a Queenax workout class at my gym, and would never had done it at all if the trainer who ran it wasn't the world's nicest, most encouraging coach--i hope you will encounter someone like her. I love that class now, though it is still hard, and look forward to it every TTh. You know what's funny? My gym is at a university and lots of fit college students work out there, but the most athletic person there is probably 85. It motivates me so much to see him jog by on the track. Start now, and in 6 months or a year you may become someone's favorite gym person to watch.
  • Sunshine_And_Sand
    Sunshine_And_Sand Posts: 1,320 Member
    Good for you!
    I’ve never actually seen any body-shaming going on at the gym. As others have said, a lot of them have been where you are and remember feeling the same way you are feeling now. Also, most people at the gym aren’t paying attention to anyone else anyway but are just trying to get their workouts done.
    Group classes are a bit different in that people may pay more attention to others as far as wanting to socialize, but I’ve still never seen any body-shaming going on with it.
    If someone actually did try to shame overweight or obese people who were in there working hard/taking action to get fitter and healthier, then they are NOT worth you spending any time worrying over what they think.
  • kshama2001
    kshama2001 Posts: 28,052 Member
    MelanieCN77 wrote: »
    Aside: who hits disagree on this kind of post?

    I'm trying to accept that people are just going to misuse the Disagree reaction.
  • gewel321
    gewel321 Posts: 718 Member
    I am a member of two gyms (one that does classes and one that I do my strength training). I do Zumba twice a week. I am the biggest person in that class and my body does not move in the same way as the skinny girls in the front. I go every time and stay in the back of the class. I keep moving and make my own moves when I can't do what everyone else is doing. I haven't had anyone say anything mean to me or look at me crazy (though in my head I still think they are).

    When I go to my strength training gym I do go kinda late in the day and it isn't busy. I put my headphones in and jam out. I am normally the biggest person there as well.

    Point is I paid the same money to be there that everyone else did. And one day I won't be the biggest person there! (though I can't imagine ever being able to do some of those moves in Zumba!!)
  • dbanks80
    dbanks80 Posts: 3,685 Member
    edited November 2019
    MelanieCN77 wrote: »
    Aside: who hits disagree on this kind of post?

    People who are negative, miserable and not brave enough to take the first step into the gym like OP. :|
  • AnnPT77
    AnnPT77 Posts: 34,622 Member
    dbanks80 wrote: »
    MelanieCN77 wrote: »
    Aside: who hits disagree on this kind of post?

    People who are negative, miserable and not brave enough to take the first step into the gym like OP. :|

    Not even brave enough to post, probably . . . .

    If so, that's really sad and unfortunate.

    Maybe we can hope that they clicked "disagree" because they think the gym isn't anxiety-provoking, but thought others had covered the why, or something like that (still seems un-empathetic).

    As you imply, I think OP is approaching this admirably. Kudos, @zuzanao!
  • Katmary71
    Katmary71 Posts: 7,147 Member
    kshama2001 wrote: »
    MelanieCN77 wrote: »
    Aside: who hits disagree on this kind of post?

    I'm trying to accept that people are just going to misuse the Disagree reaction.

    I agree with this. I was disagreed with twice for saying stuff with small calories add up. How that's something to disagree with is beyond me.
  • dbanks80
    dbanks80 Posts: 3,685 Member
    John772016 wrote: »
    Lots of great advice above👍.

    I was the newbie in the gym.
    In 2016.

    The first week I tried to walk 20 minutes on the treadmill each day. It was hard for me, I didn't want do it each day.
    I did.

    I thought everyone was staring at me wondering when I'd get off the treadmill so they could use it for real exercise.
    They weren't.

    I thought I was in everyone's way.
    I wasn't.

    I thought 'what's the point its only 20 mins, it won't help me'.
    It did.

    I eventually added weight training & thought the big muscular guys would be annoyed I was on their equipment.
    They weren't.

    The hardest thing for me was to stop giving myself a reason why I couldn't, and start doing. To decide I would.

    It sounds like you've done that.

    Your self confidence will come too, you just need to go there and meet it halfway.







    Love this! <3
  • foreverblissful
    foreverblissful Posts: 50 Member
    edited November 2019
    Personally, I felt the same way when I started. My best advice to you is stick to those classes AT FIRST to find a safe grounding in the gym and have guidance(for safety reasons and confidence-building). The gym can definitely be a scary place, you see everyone with their "set routines" doing exercises you've never even though imaginable, and I think the most important thing is to find a safe space where you can learn everything they took time to learn(cuz they didn’t do it over night either)!

    I went to the gym for the first time ever by myself to do strength training machines and it was horribly stressful and made me feel incompetant. The second time I went to the gym, my boyfriend dragged me despite that experience and it was 10x more comfortable, he showed me around the gym and acted as my personal trainer recommending exercises to me and how to do them safely. It was a slow process but that got me feeling more comfortable on the machines, and it wasn't until I took an introduction to the weight room class at my college that I truly became comfortable in the gym especially using free weights. In that class I basically just had a coach demo an exercise each class, and could choose to try it or not, we also were able to go to them for advice. This is why I recommend sticking with those classes or if you feel like those are too expensive see if you can find a friend who knows their way around the gym for a few days day too or even longer term if they're up to it. Having a class or a friend also helps you stay consistent too!

    Summary:
    If you can afford a trainer for a long period of time:

    1. Try to stick with classes for your first few months to get you in the habit & gain confidence in the gym. Any class that focuses on a set routine especially with gym equipment that will also help you build your own is perfect! Even if they don't explicitly help you build a routine speak to the trainer, I'm sure they would be happy to help you with your own personal goals!
    2. Try to pick classes that meet at least 2-3 times a week.
    3. Try to pick a class that incorporatss some form of strength training even if it only requires body weight. Cardio + Strength Training will help you lose weight and keep it off, versus Cardio only especially when you get further in your journey.

    If you feel like you can't afford a trainer for months on end my advice summarized is:

    1. Go to the gym with a trusted friend or buddy at least the first few times. Even if they can only go with you once a week for two-three weeks for instance, it will help! The other days of the week when you're by yourself it'll be an easier adjustment vs no guidance at all.
    2. Any new gym you go to, you are always entitled to a tour of the gym, take advantage of it!
    3. Stick to machines at first(cardio machines mixed with strength training machines for strength training days). Machines are easy to learn, because they come with instructions. They also help you test different weights in the comfort of the machines booth. For cardio machines, you can easily find online guided workouts on youtube. After you feel more comfortable with machines, slowly incorporate free weights with simple full-body moves such as lunges, or squats.


    I hope that wasn't too long and it helped! I 100% feel your pain, gym cultures are so annoying, but you can do it!
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