Self-identity

i identified as a runner for 30 years. then i had an accident that prohibited me from running. it gutted me because this was something i did for so many types of release. i then discovered flamenco dance , which then became my obsession. now i can not do that anymore either. and i mourned the loss of that more than running. it was a passion more than running ever was. i chased it all over spain and north america and it gave me great pleasure at the time. but life throws things at you that you never expect.

i discovered through my diagnosis with cancer, that i am more than my identity of what i do to keep it moving, i've stopped putting emphasis on labels and have found that i'm just a body. a body that is still living, breathing, coping.

the max i can do is hike and walk in summer, cycle and treadmill and occasional weight lifting in winters at the gym. i do yoga on a daily basis.

for me - now i'm just doing what i can to stay reasonably limber and somewhat agile. the fact i put myself in a box with runner then flamenco dancer, and mourning those inabilities to continue with those activities, damaged me more than was necessary. i'm in a better place mentally because cancer showed me that i'm more than identifying myself as *such and such*