I feel like giving up on life

buhani80
buhani80 Posts: 3 Member
in Introduce Yourself
My relative recently suffered a stroke. I’m morbidly obese. I’m depression. I’m lonely. I’m unhealthy and unhappy. I lost and gained weight all my life and after the recent break up where the *kitten* cheated on me and embarrassed me I’ve lost the will to fight or take care of myself. I’m lost and I feel alone. The heavier I get the harder it gets to lose that weight. I have hypertension. Sever high blood pressure. And i stopped taking my medication. I want to lose weight but it’s almost impossible. The junk food everywhere. Comfort carbs. And difficulty exercising at a consistent level. Help me anyone. Thank you

Replies

  • nutmegoreo
    nutmegoreo Posts: 15,532 Member
    edited November 2019
    It won't be easy, but you can turn your life around. Lots of great information here, and lots of supportive people.

    Start by reading through this:

    https://community.myfitnesspal.com/en/discussion/1080242/a-guide-to-get-you-started-on-your-path-to-sexypants/p1

    It's one of my favourites. Other threads to read are in the stickied posts at the top of each of the forums.

    There is also a group here for people who have a lot to lose.

    https://community.myfitnesspal.com/en/group/133315-larger-losers
  • corinasue1143
    corinasue1143 Posts: 7,464 Member
    Welcome! You’ve come to the right place! You aren’t alone anymore. We’re here to help you take control again.
    Step 1. You’ve already done it, you came here!
    Step 2. Set up your account.
    Step 3. Start logging. Strive for perfection, but remember you’re just a beginner and the first week or two are a learning time.
    Step 4. Start reading. Lots of good info.
    Step 5. Make friends who can help you. Help them when you can.
    Good luck on your journey!
  • ReenieHJ
    ReenieHJ Posts: 9,724 Member
    Many have been where you are. :( Food is such a comfort, an outlet, something to grab for when life is tough. It's up to you to turn that around but with support, and help you can and will do it. You've reached the bottom, one way up now!! Make a plan. See your dr. Make your acct. here and that will help you make the plan as far as calories. Take it slow and steady, simple and smart. Don't worry about fancy diets or lots of exercise, not until you feel more confident in what you're doing and more in control. Take basic healthy foods and turn them into your meal plan. I stay very basic in mine, less choice and less temptation that way. DON'T GIVE UP!!! If a situation arises where you simply have to have something, create a new habit such as going outside, reading a magazine, chew gum, walk around your house or block. Anything to get you away from your temptation. I've stopped bringing certain foods into the house because I know my danger zones. It doesn't mean I'll never eat them again but instead of buying the 1/2 gallon of ice cream, go out and buy a small cone. I overate on Thursday and made that a cheat day, but threw everything else out Friday a.m. or made dh eat it. I have been known to throw a lot of food out lately. Made a whole pan of mac n cheese for a potluck a week ago. Still had 2/3 of it left. That 1 day I indulged then told dh whatever he wasn't planning on eating was going into the trash and it did. Wasteful? Yes, but at least it didn't sabotage my eating for more than a day. Find ways to avoid all the temptation. I guarantee you as you go along it will become a bit easier and the more you feel control over it, the more success you will have!! Plus do NOT look at the big picture; that can be very depressing and overwhelming. Think of your journey in 5 lb. increments.
    PLEASE hang in there, get started, no more excuses and don't ever give up!!!! I'm 66 and finally feel like I have control! YOU are totally worth it!!! Soon we'll be seeing your before/after pictures. :)
  • ReenieHJ
    ReenieHJ Posts: 9,724 Member
    One other thing I suggest, due to your severe depression, is to seek out a good counselor who you can connect with. You do NOT have to go it alone.
    Oh and one more thing :) maybe start a gratitude journal so you'll realize that life IS good, life IS worth it.
  • Carbs_are_why_im_here
    Carbs_are_why_im_here Posts: 21 Member
    Never give up.
  • BlackBartBlues
    BlackBartBlues Posts: 5 Member
    I reduced my weight from 365 lbs and 64% body fat last year, this time, to 192.8 lbs currently with 20% body fat. I was prediabetic, had high blood pressure and had high cholesterol (morbidly high). Currently, I have been taken off of BP medication, my cholesterol medication has been cut to minimum (even though my levels are normal, doc wants me to keep taking a "maintenance" dose) and I am no longer prediabetic.

    I did the following:

    1. Go to tdeecalculator.net and calculate your total daily energy expenditure. The tool also gives you the calories you need to eat to both maintain your current weight and lose, about 2 lbs a month (which is about 500 calories less a day). The tool also gives you options to choose your macro split. For me a low fat, high protein, low carb, high fiber, low sugar diet helped.

    2. I intermittent fasted. 16/8.

    3. Diet is the major part of weight loss - 80% of effort. Exercise is the other 20%. Track your calories based on the macro split you define for youself. If you follow a high protein, low fat, low carb, high fiber and low sugar diet, you will automatically be eating less calories, but you will be full all the time and not be hungry. It will also help you develop new "Favorite foods", that are healthy and delicious.

    3. Exercise - You dont have to do much. Do 15 mins of cardio every day (walking on a treadmill), and 30 mins of circuit weights. Weights is key. Start with 1 set on each machine and proceed till you reach 3 sets. At the same time increase cardio to 30 mins in your own time. Workout atleast 5 times a week.

    4. Consistency - This is perhaps the most important thing. Consistency with dieting and exercise is important. Track everything you eat. Workout every day.

    5. Motivation - My biggest inspiration was David Goggins. That man is a beast. I followed his philosophy of "Embrace the suck". For example if I went to a grocery store and found a $1 pound cake, and if I craved that because it was just one tiny piece of cake for which I could work out 15 mins extra the next day, I would force myself to go to bed hungry. You do that twice, you will automatically not look at another piece of cake the next time you go to the grocery store. For me the masochism worked. Not saying you should do this, am not even sure if that is healthy, but that is what I did and that is what worked for me. Bottomline, find your own motivation. But be consistent.

    6. Mental health - See your GP and get an appointment with a psychologist. Perhaps CBT will help? I have health anxiety, social anxiety and depression. I just booked an appointment with a psychologist and will be seeing him from February after my vacation in December/January.
  • Kurtmarblecobra
    Kurtmarblecobra Posts: 4 Member
    I like the Gratitude journal that someone else mentioned there is power in that . win the morning and you will win your life back . I have a similar story like yours and I made some new habits and started regaining control of my life . I’m not done yet but my life is so much happier and healthier so here is my advice.
    First thing in morning (every morning) say to god or to yourself what you are thankful for even if it’s small say thank you don’t open your phone or listen to tv for at least an hour and eat a banana stretch read book have coffee. Make the morning about you to reflect on positive things ( bananas have good mood vitamins in it btw) also make goals for yourself ones that are easy to achieve at first short term goals write them down for example( I’m not going to eat junk food today instead I will get my sugar fix from a fruit for today) start small with your goals and once you start reaching your goals you will gain momentum and pretty soon you will be a goal crusher and the feeling of accomplishment will give you super powers to keep going.
    Also I listen to a lot of motivational stuff on YouTube just type in motivational speeches and there are all kinds it helped me when I wasn’t motivated. I hope this helps 😊

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