Mindfulness and Eating
shel80kg
Posts: 161 Member
Yet again, I face the challenge of addressing my persistent, chronic and powerful pattern of ignoring/dissociating my food intake from the consequences of poor health and gross weight gain. Today, I start the uphill process of eating healthy, eating regularly and eating mindfully. My relationship with food is one fraught with tension, stress, codependence and addiction. I intend to approach this next step in my life with honesty and conviction. But, I could use your help. Would anyone reading this first thread, like to join me on this journey. I start today at 105kg and poor muscle tone, low fitness and fear. No pretending. But...there is always hope. Join me>
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Replies
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Day 2
Struggling and wondered how did I become so fat and lost? So many reasons to avoid eating properly. And now, those reasons cannot matter. Food is food.Junk is junk. Time to get real and be responsible. Watch this space!1 -
Have you started a food diary? Have you calculated a modest calories deficit and tried to put together a plan to hit your number?
I never set out to “eat clean” or even healthy. I learned the power of a food diary at Weight Watchers. Despite what they might say, WW is basically calorie counting disguised so they can get copyright protection. So I went about trying to hit my points number.
The problem I encountered- Getting enough to eat. How was I going to get enough food for the points? I quickly realized that fresh vegetables, fruit and lean protein were my best friends. Plus, when I started, I had points left over for various treats and splurges. And I lost weight. But this- as I lost weight my daily point budget was cut. That meant more veggies, and lean protein, fewer treats and splurges.
Long way to say you don’t need to change everything at once. Try to find some reasonable limits and try to establish some good habits. Calorie counting, supported by a food diary works. Do the process and the better nutrition and weight loss will follow.
Last- try not to kick yourself. First, its ok to struggle. No one was born counting calories. Plus, habits can be hard to break. I think its easier to find replacements. Your new habits only need to be better than the old ones. If you keep tinkering and adjusting you’ll get where you want to be. It just takes persistence. And try not go get bogged down in regret, its a dead end. Good luck. You can do this, never quit.6 -
Echoing what @88olds said.
You can't do anything about who you were you can only do something about who you are. The past needs to be limited to objective review for education.
One of the things that makes me cringe is seeing someone trying to change their lives saying they plan to eat healthy food. On paper that sounds like a good idea but if it involves a radical shift in behavior it seldom ends well. Your first goal should be to eat a healthy number of calories while limiting how hungry you feel. Nutrition can be improved later on. Try to only exclude foods that you absolutely cannot moderate and do not expect yourself to be perfect. Perfection is not required and the pursuit of it often just makes things worse. I have lost your entire current body weight being imperfect.10 -
I am wondering why you use the word "cringe"? The truth is that although you will probably argue that it is calories first, calories are NOT the same with reference to how the body responds and reacts to the foods which are associated with the calorie. Of course the calorie itself is a term used to describe a unit of energy. However, from a physiological point of view, the vehicle which carries the calorie MUST be considered at many levels in terms of what the metabolic processes and chemical reactions do with the food. Thus, eating healthy is an approriate and useful terms and ought not to be "cringe-worthy". Thanks for your help but your comments really were neither relevant or considerate of the wholistic approach to nutrition and general health.
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Further, I do not agree with "calorie counting" which is one of the leading issues in the realm of eating disorders. A better and more long term approach relates to portions and weights of foods which are required for good health. Reducing sugars as much as possible, increasing protein and be careful with those "foods" which have poor oils, transfatty acids etc... I am sure you would agree.
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In the context of the MFP app and this associated forum calorie counting is a tool. When used well the aim (in my mind) is to make explicit the link between food intake and overall health and weight. At the end of the process you should know what works for you.
If you have used calorie counting in a negative way in the past then it may not be the way take control in the future.
Find what works for you and good luck.4 -
This is a calorie counting app. Not all do it and have had success. The above posters are experienced and have been successful. I follow their advice and concur. You can eat whatever you want, as long as you keep a calorie deficit. How you do that is up to you. Many people on here have become overweight eating "healthy" and "mindfully". No one wants to rain on your parade, but after you've been here for 6 years you see many posts on the subject and some people get so frustrated because things aren't working as they intellectually planned. Wishing you grand success.4
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@shel80kg
What I’m suggesting is a set of things to do. Mindful and healthy eating and fixing your relationship with food are worthy goals but are not things to do. As an experiment try making a list of everything you eat and drink for a couple of weeks. Does that reveal anything? Does just keeping the list make you more mindful? Does it help in pursuit of your goals?
I lost from 285 lbs to about 230 just basically “watching what I ate.” After I was stuck at 230 for a while I started monitoring how much fat I was eating. I cut out red meat, fried food and most cheese. I lost about 15 more lbs until I got stuck again at around 215 lbs. I was stuck there for years. But life was good. I trained with weights, built my upper body, got rid of my CPAP, had healthy BP and ran my kids ragged in the parks in Orlando. But I was still obese.
In desperation I joined WW. I found it embarrassing. But I wanted to close the deal at a healthy weight. As soon as I started tracking using a food scale to crunch the numbers the problem became apparent- I was eating too much. Even my typical dinner of grilled chicken breast, brown rice and a vegetable was too much. Probably by a couple of hundred calories. And just that 200 calories per day over time can be the difference between a healthy weight and obesity.
I never envisioned myself living like I do with a food scale on my counter but the hard facts are that when I got the first food scale in 2006 I weighted 216 lbs and yesterday when I weighed myself I weighed 172 lbs. Not bad for a guy who started at 285 lbs.
I don’t make any money from MFP, I don’t own their stock. But weight loss saved my life and I want to help other people who are at risk. Reject what I say out of hand if you want, I’m only telling you my experience. I know the weighing and measuring and counting drives some people nuts but have you tried it? Maybe and experiment?
A great irony is that everyone is “trying to lose weight,” but losing weight is not itself a thing to do. Weight loss is a byproduct of doing a lot of little things.10 -
Dear 88olds
I appreciate your willingness to share your story and the amazing story of your weight loss. It sounds like you have truly embraced the best strategies that work for you and there is clearly wisdom in what you write. Thank you for your input and congratulations.
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Further, I do not agree with "calorie counting" which is one of the leading issues in the realm of eating disorders. A better and more long term approach relates to portions and weights of foods which are required for good health. Reducing sugars as much as possible, increasing protein and be careful with those "foods" which have poor oils, transfatty acids etc... I am sure you would agree.
They have disordered thinking.
to lose weight you must eat less calories than your body burns. that is literally the only way it happens. and to do so, typically monitoring your calorie intake is required.1 -
Hi Shel80kgs, I am after gaining 28 pounds in 12 months and just printed out 3 photos of my former self. I have achieved lots over the year but I've decided my weight gain effects me so negatively I would like to join you on your journey! I need to change everything I've ever learnt about loosing weight. I've never gotten the whole 'life style' change instead of a loosing weight plan (or DIET!!) Ive done it before but never got the balance right and now I've to start again. Even loosing half the weight I've gained will help so much0
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I am pretty much a compulsive overeater. Calorie counting doesnt work because if I want to eat something I don't care if I've already had my calorie count for the day. So mindful eating is working for me. I'm eating less because I only eat when I'm hungry and stop when I'm no longer hungry. I don't eat because the clock says it's mealtime or because someone else is eating. Mostly healthy food, but not always. When I track I see that my calorie count is less, but my eating is not based on that calorie count. Same difference, but a different way of going about it.0
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I am pretty much a compulsive overeater. Calorie counting doesnt work because if I want to eat something I don't care if I've already had my calorie count for the day. So mindful eating is working for me. I'm eating less because I only eat when I'm hungry and stop when I'm no longer hungry. I don't eat because the clock says it's mealtime or because someone else is eating. Mostly healthy food, but not always. When I track I see that my calorie count is less, but my eating is not based on that calorie count. Same difference, but a different way of going about it.
but it does work.
you don't work it. just because you don't eat according to your calorie count, doesn't mean the calorie counting doesn't work.2 -
I am wondering why you use the word "cringe"? The truth is that although you will probably argue that it is calories first, calories are NOT the same with reference to how the body responds and reacts to the foods which are associated with the calorie. Of course the calorie itself is a term used to describe a unit of energy. However, from a physiological point of view, the vehicle which carries the calorie MUST be considered at many levels in terms of what the metabolic processes and chemical reactions do with the food. Thus, eating healthy is an approriate and useful terms and ought not to be "cringe-worthy". Thanks for your help but your comments really were neither relevant or considerate of the wholistic approach to nutrition and general health.
There are different mechanisms for how certain macros are processed by the body. They should not be the focus of a person trying to lose weight and especially if that person says they have a bad relationship with food.
When you strip everything away it comes back to a simple energy balance. If you burn more than you eat your body will use stored energy to make up the demand. Worrying about the thermic effect of food or anything else the internet wants us to worry about adds requirements to the equation that may make the process of losing weight even harder than it needs to be. Harder is less sustainable.
If you have enough weight to lose that losing it will improve your health either directly or statistically then anything that makes it harder and less sustainable is, by definition, not healthy. In other words when I eat treat food mingled in with my diet and it makes the process easier for me to sustain I lose weight over a very long period of time. By my definition that makes potato chips, pizza, french fries, fast food, etc. all part of a healthy diet. My frequent blood tests agree. I moderate all of them but they are there.
Also, I am not using 'cringe' at you directly. I have no idea what your definition of "healthy" eating is. I have seen it used here enough times to mean a stark and strict approach that it makes me, well, cringe.2 -
Yet again, I face the challenge of addressing my persistent, chronic and powerful pattern of ignoring/dissociating my food intake from the consequences of poor health and gross weight gain. Today, I start the uphill process of eating healthy, eating regularly and eating mindfully. My relationship with food is one fraught with tension, stress, codependence and addiction. I intend to approach this next step in my life with honesty and conviction. But, I could use your help. Would anyone reading this first thread, like to join me on this journey. I start today at 105kg and poor muscle tone, low fitness and fear. No pretending. But...there is always hope. Join me>
You really have to lead this, but everyone here at MFP is happy to support you on the journey.
We can't stop you from eating oversized portions, but we can help direct you to the tools to determine the correct portions for your size and goals, share recipes and tell about our various tricks to keep ourselves on track.
Nothing we say will get you up and exercizing, but there is an entire forum section devoted to tips and tricks in this area.
It's a personal journey, at the food on your plate level, but it's a group adventure at MFP.
Hang in there, you can do it!
good luck to us all.2 -
I am wondering why you use the word "cringe"? The truth is that although you will probably argue that it is calories first, calories are NOT the same with reference to how the body responds and reacts to the foods which are associated with the calorie. Of course the calorie itself is a term used to describe a unit of energy. However, from a physiological point of view, the vehicle which carries the calorie MUST be considered at many levels in terms of what the metabolic processes and chemical reactions do with the food. Thus, eating healthy is an approriate and useful terms and ought not to be "cringe-worthy". Thanks for your help but your comments really were neither relevant or considerate of the wholistic approach to nutrition and general health.
There are different mechanisms for how certain macros are processed by the body. They should not be the focus of a person trying to lose weight and especially if that person says they have a bad relationship with food.
When you strip everything away it comes back to a simple energy balance. If you burn more than you eat your body will use stored energy to make up the demand. Worrying about the thermic effect of food or anything else the internet wants us to worry about adds requirements to the equation that may make the process of losing weight even harder than it needs to be. Harder is less sustainable.
If you have enough weight to lose that losing it will improve your health either directly or statistically then anything that makes it harder and less sustainable is, by definition, not healthy. In other words when I eat treat food mingled in with my diet and it makes the process easier for me to sustain I lose weight over a very long period of time. By my definition that makes potato chips, pizza, french fries, fast food, etc. all part of a healthy diet. My frequent blood tests agree. I moderate all of them but they are there.
Also, I am not using 'cringe' at you directly. I have no idea what your definition of "healthy" eating is. I have seen it used here enough times to mean a stark and strict approach that it makes me, well, cringe.
Ah yes, I believe a few people around here call it "majoring in the minors". Like using a toothbrush to paint a whole wall when you can use a roller and get 85% of it done in a minute. Use the paint roller first, and then you can get the corners with a paintbrush.
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I should also mention I am speaking from my own experience. In 3 decades of failed weight loss I very often denounced all the food I loved to eat in the name of healthy eating and weight loss. All of of those attempts failed and I stayed heavy or got heavier. However I have been on my current plan for nearly 2 years and lost over 200 pounds. Based on my fairly thorough tracking for most of it I have lost my weight at around 3500 calories per pound regardless of what I have eaten.4
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Lately, I can't seem to control myself. My eating is not mindful and I have been making a lot of excuses... so the scale goes up and I feel crappy- both mentally and physically.
Today is a day off from work and day for myself. I am going to focus on eating right and moving. Starting slow and changing small things does not work for me - I start making allowances for things I really shouldn't be eating simply because for i.e. - I'm drinking more water. That is not going to help against eating cake. I am going to be mindful of the foods I ingest today and planning for tomorrow as well. I'll take it a couple of days at a time.1 -
I am pretty much a compulsive overeater. Calorie counting doesnt work because if I want to eat something I don't care if I've already had my calorie count for the day. So mindful eating is working for me. I'm eating less because I only eat when I'm hungry and stop when I'm no longer hungry. I don't eat because the clock says it's mealtime or because someone else is eating. Mostly healthy food, but not always. When I track I see that my calorie count is less, but my eating is not based on that calorie count. Same difference, but a different way of going about it.
but it does work.
you don't work it. just because you don't eat according to your calorie count, doesn't mean the calorie counting doesn't work.
I'm sorry. I meant to say it doesn't work "for me." I have friends and I know it does work for them. It doesn't work for me because I cant/ wont/don't want to stick to.it.0 -
I am pretty much a compulsive overeater. Calorie counting doesnt work because if I want to eat something I don't care if I've already had my calorie count for the day. So mindful eating is working for me. I'm eating less because I only eat when I'm hungry and stop when I'm no longer hungry. I don't eat because the clock says it's mealtime or because someone else is eating. Mostly healthy food, but not always. When I track I see that my calorie count is less, but my eating is not based on that calorie count. Same difference, but a different way of going about it.
but it does work.
you don't work it. just because you don't eat according to your calorie count, doesn't mean the calorie counting doesn't work.
I'm sorry. I meant to say it doesn't work "for me." I have friends and I know it does work for them. It doesn't work for me because I cant/ wont/don't want to stick to.it.
so it does work. you don't use it to your benefit. just to be clear. (not to be rude)0
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