I think they preferred me fat!

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Curves73
Curves73 Posts: 134 Member
in Chit-Chat
Hi All, I recently lost 50+ lbs, goal to get down 20-40 more. But I have noticed lately a lot of people are not really happy about my weight loss. They liked that I was the fat friend. Maybe insecurity plays a part. Have you noticed this with family, friends or partners?

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  • kyle0404
    kyle0404 Posts: 33 Member
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    I agree with mammabear anyone who is hating on your success isn't a good friend/family member. I've run into a lot of people acting negative towards me when I am accomplishing a goal. I'm not sure why, but I've also noticed that people are always quick to encourage me to break my diet and eat junk food, and no one ever offers encouragement to stay on track. I don't claim to understand people's motives, but it does seem common to run into the kind of problems you're having. I'm not going to recommend cutting people out of your life, but definitely disregard their negativity. And of course keep crushing your goals, losing that much weight is amazing, you should be proud of yourself and don't let anyone tell you that you shouldn't.
  • Tinydancer106
    Tinydancer106 Posts: 3,678 Member
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    Congrats on your loss girl!!! 🙌😍💃

    I agree with all the above posters and we'll said mamabear! 🤗

    Perhaps if these people with the less than helpful comments are close enough to you and worth the effort ...you could explain like mama bear did with her sister....if they see the error of their ways great lesson learned and relationship salvaged.....😁❤

    If not just smile and wave as you leave then behind and continue on to a better you girl!!!💃....big hugs!
  • kimber0607
    kimber0607 Posts: 994 Member
    edited January 2020
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    Im sorry that you are feeling this way (getting these vibes from family-friends)
    after all your hard work!
    Keep it up!
    You are getting healthier and stronger....never be a bad thing
  • MileHighFitness
    MileHighFitness Posts: 2,298 Member
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    It was the same way with my wife. I never felt I had her support when I was getting fit. Keep up the hard work. you're doing great.

    Now I have a question for you ladies! I ended up finding someone that did support me and offered encouragement when I absolutely needed it. We ended up taking things off MFP. In our texts I've called her Babe. The texting was a couple of years ago. My wife recently found the texts and now doesn't want me calling her Babe. Is she being petty about this?
  • Joanna2012B
    Joanna2012B Posts: 1,448 Member
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    @curves73 keep your head high, I am guessing it is jealousy. The friends that are true friends will accept you as you are! Congrats on your awesome achievement!!!
    MileHighFitness wrote: »
    It was the same way with my wife. I never felt I had her support when I was getting fit. Keep up the hard work. you're doing great.

    Now I have a question for you ladies! I ended up finding someone that did support me and offered encouragement when I absolutely needed it. We ended up taking things off MFP. In our texts I've called her Babe. The texting was a couple of years ago. My wife recently found the texts and now doesn't want me calling her Babe. Is she being petty about this?

    I am sorry, in my opinion she is not being petty. I made a connection over MFP with a man and my husband is well aware of him. He actually friended him on Facebook. I feel like he is more like family than just a friend. You should always have honesty with your partner.
  • poisonesse
    poisonesse Posts: 529 Member
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    a true friend will be happy for you for doing something to better your life. Anyone that doesn't appreciate the work you've gone through to get where you are today is simply jealous, leave them behind because they will only hinder the rest of your life.

    @MileHighFitness ... no, she isn't being petty, I did the same thing when I found out my hubby called an old girlfriend "babe" and then tried to use that same term with me.
  • MileHighFitness
    MileHighFitness Posts: 2,298 Member
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    TwitchyMacGee wrote: »
    MileHighFitness wrote: »
    It was the same way with my wife. I never felt I had her support when I was getting fit. Keep up the hard work. you're doing great.

    Now I have a question for you ladies! I ended up finding someone that did support me and offered encouragement when I absolutely needed it. We ended up taking things off MFP. In our texts I've called her Babe. The texting was a couple of years ago. My wife recently found the texts and now doesn't want me calling her Babe. Is she being petty about this?

    You’re saying you had a friendship or “friendship” that you purposely kept secret from your spouse and now she has found the old texts which you saved and she wants you not to call her babe. Is this correct?

    This was a secret friendship. I've explained to my wife it didn't mean anything. Shouldn't that count for something?
    Joanna2012B wrote: »
    @curves73 keep your head high, I am guessing it is jealousy. The friends that are true friends will accept you as you are! Congrats on your awesome achievement!!!
    MileHighFitness wrote: »
    It was the same way with my wife. I never felt I had her support when I was getting fit. Keep up the hard work. you're doing great.

    Now I have a question for you ladies! I ended up finding someone that did support me and offered encouragement when I absolutely needed it. We ended up taking things off MFP. In our texts I've called her Babe. The texting was a couple of years ago. My wife recently found the texts and now doesn't want me calling her Babe. Is she being petty about this?

    I am sorry, in my opinion she is not being petty. I made a connection over MFP with a man and my husband is well aware of him. He actually friended him on Facebook. I feel like he is more like family than just a friend. You should always have honesty with your partner.

    We were in a really bad place in our relationship and I didn't feel like I could talk to her. This other person really listened to me and gave me the support I needed.
  • Curves73
    Curves73 Posts: 134 Member
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    No one has said anything negative, they have been supportive, I just get a feeling they are a bit bummed that They need to start caring for themselves. One coworker thinks I’m too skinny, she clearly has body image issues, because I have come a long way but I am no where near too skinny.
  • MyFight2beHealthy
    MyFight2beHealthy Posts: 22 Member
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    Curves73 wrote: »
    Hi All, I recently lost 50+ lbs, goal to get down 20-40 more. But I have noticed lately a lot of people are not really happy about my weight loss. They liked that I was the fat friend. Maybe insecurity plays a part. Have you noticed this with family, friends or partners?

    Yes, when I first started dropping weight I was accused of starving myself... Lol crazy cause I sooo love food lmao
  • emeraldeyes2020
    emeraldeyes2020 Posts: 231 Member
    edited February 2020
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    I’ve noticed friends and family do not invite me out anywhere with them anymore at all, don’t visit and don’t want to take pics with me in them anymore. A few have told me they don’t like the way their bf or spouse is around me or looks at me so rather keep their distance, others said they don’t like the amount of attention I get off guys when we are out, I speak to anyone I’m friendly, but they say I’m flirting and they’re looking for love I’m not 🤷🏻‍♀️

    It’s their problem not mine or yours, hold your head high and be proud of what you have achieved 🤗

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