Finding motivation when in a relationship?
JTurnerUK
Posts: 4 Member
A few years ago I chose to lose weight and get in shape for the sole purpose of women. 2 years later I am happy and settled with my gf and she basically loves me whether I'm in shape or not therefore I find it hard to find the motivation as I have no pressure on me or nobody to impress.
Any advice? I mean I want to lose weight but I don't have that drive that I used to have when single.
Any advice? I mean I want to lose weight but I don't have that drive that I used to have when single.
2
Replies
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Your health is a big consideration. Yes?4
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Want to live happily and healthfully with her for a long time? Maybe, someday in the future, have a family together? Be able to have active fun play with those kids, see them graduate, marry, whatever? Meet the grandkids?
Consider the long view.6 -
I think you'll feel pretty badly if you gain back all of what you tried so hard to lose. Aren't you more confident? Impress your girlfriend, don't give up.1
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A few years ago I chose to lose weight and get in shape for the sole purpose of women. 2 years later I am happy and settled with my gf and she basically loves me whether I'm in shape or not therefore I find it hard to find the motivation as I have no pressure on me or nobody to impress.
Any advice? I mean I want to lose weight but I don't have that drive that I used to have when single.
From what I see you are happy with the woman in your life. Do you want to spend as much time with her as you can? I will assume that the answer is yes. Then getting or staying in shape is very important, for both of you. It is something you can do together. So there is motivation and accountability all in one package.
Have a great life!
TEK3 -
A few years ago I chose to lose weight and get in shape for the sole purpose of women. 2 years later I am happy and settled with my gf and she basically loves me whether I'm in shape or not therefore I find it hard to find the motivation as I have no pressure on me or nobody to impress.
Any advice? I mean I want to lose weight but I don't have that drive that I used to have when single.
A self maintaining girlfriend requiring minimal care and attention!
N I C E!
Coast city!
If feeling better about yourself is not good enough for at least some effort... not sure what anyone else can offer.
<there is Olympic athlete. there is beer guzzling slob. there is something in between.>4 -
This motivation should be coming from you....and don't believe your gf...she wants what she 'signed up' for in the beginning of your relationship. lol!7
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Want to live happily and healthfully with her for a long time? Maybe, someday in the future, have a family together? Be able to have active fun play with those kids, see them graduate, marry, whatever? Meet the grandkids?
Consider the long view.
I got some hugs for this, so I'm possibly naive and romatic.
So, contemplate the alternative: This relationship doesn't work out, which would be sad.
In which case, you're going to be on the prowl again, wanting to be cute. Easier to maintain, rather than having to re-attain.
/cynic
The real reason is still your future self.
Trust me on this, I'm age 64: You can reach 60, be fat, sick, on lots of meds, unable to eat/drink what you want because of medication interactions and health conditions, unable to do what you want because of unfitness, in pain more of the time, on a fast track to assisted living and death - I see this exact thing in my inactive/obese friends my own age, and used to see it to a lesser extent in myself - or you can reach 60 pretty chipper, active, enjoying life - which I see in my healthy-weight, active same-age friends. Choices, when young, have consequences. I was an idiot, and didn't realize this in time.4 -
Do it for you, your health and your own self worth. Good luck!2
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This might sound harsh but it is something that haunts me and helps me in equal measure.
I don't want my husband, who also loves me no matter what I look like, to become my carer just because I "didnt need to try anymore" So many health problems appear with weight gain and lack of fitness.
Losing weight to get women/men is fine but now you have one you need a long term plan to make sure you keep her and you can spend many years doing fun things together.
Show her how much you love her by taking care of yourself.7 -
Better endurance for extracurricular activities too!1
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