Is your family annoying about weightloss
cyaneverfat
Posts: 527 Member
They
-think you have to eat like 1200 calories a day
-don't believe you should eat any exercise calories back (even if you burn like 2000 extra calories that day)
-have good and bad foods
-don't think you should eat any treats
-watch you very closely
-comment on everything you do
-think fast weightloss is better
-don't realise you lose weight by eating less and moving more, not from banning certain foods
I guess it's my fault, because whenever I try to lose weight, I have trouble keeping it to myself because I get excited.
-think you have to eat like 1200 calories a day
-don't believe you should eat any exercise calories back (even if you burn like 2000 extra calories that day)
-have good and bad foods
-don't think you should eat any treats
-watch you very closely
-comment on everything you do
-think fast weightloss is better
-don't realise you lose weight by eating less and moving more, not from banning certain foods
I guess it's my fault, because whenever I try to lose weight, I have trouble keeping it to myself because I get excited.
17
Replies
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Or even people in general, don't seem to understand how weight loss works; with a calorific deficit.5
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Loosing weight in general it’s hard. They’re always going to have something to say about it. When they see your results they’ll ask how you did it7
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KLoGetsHealthy wrote: »Loosing weight in general it’s hard. They’re always going to have something to say about it. When they see your results they’ll ask how you did it
Then rubbish me, tell me why I'm wrong and tell me what would work for them if they bothered doing it1 -
I think a lot of people are influenced by the high profile fast results programmes like Weightwatchers or certain diets, and that's why a lot of people think it is very hard to lose weight, foods are good or bad, and you have to severely restrict yourself to succeed.
The reality of a lifestyle change, slow progress, slow weight loss, something sustainable over the long term... it's not as exciting, so some people won't really get it or won't show as much interest until you've lost a lot of weight. Then they're like "woah, how can I do that in 2 weeks?!"
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Yeh, just slightly annoying because I try to not let it sink in.
Most of the time it revolves around 'you don't need to lose anymore weight, here have some candy' type of mentality.
The way so many people in my family, show love is through food. I guess it stems back to the way we were brought up. Big dinners, desserts, etc.5 -
I think a lot of people are influenced by the high profile fast results programmes like Weightwatchers or certain diets, and that's why a lot of people think it is very hard to lose weight, foods are good or bad, and you have to severely restrict yourself to succeed.
I think the only good thing about Weight Watchers, from when I did it was that I was eating so much less, that my stomach couldn't hold as much food so I didn't get as hungry. The first few weeks were difficult though. At least when I first did it, they mostly did calorie counting.
Now you are heavily discouraged from eating your exercise calories back. UghThen they're like "woah, how can I do that in 2 weeks?!"
Haha, true1 -
Yeh, just slightly annoying because I try to not let it sink in.
Most of the time it revolves around 'you don't need to lose anymore weight, here have some candy' type of mentality.
The way so many people in my family, show love is through food. I guess it stems back to the way we were brought up. Big dinners, desserts, etc.
Yup, we have this in my family too. My mum serves gigantic portions, especially to my brothers (apparently if you're male you need twice as much food )
Over the last year or so, my brothers (early 20's) have become much more health aware and although not overweight they've changed their diets and lifestyles a lot and become much leaner and fitter as a result. My mum has found it hard adjusting to giving them smaller portions that they ask for and less meat. Doesn't help that they have huge plates so an average size portion looks very small on them!
It is a very difficult thing to balance - as you say, many people show love through food and that is also really great! So it's just about politely balancing that with health needs.1 -
Fortunately for me - I'm kind of the trend setting in my family when it comes to this.3
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My mom is starting keto and is saying no more junk food/fast food. Should be interesting to watch.2
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It's not just family it's anybody. When I was in high school and shortly after I had an issue keeping weight on because of my activity level. No matter how much junk I would eat, my body fat percentage was really low and my family would give me garbage for it. In my mid-twenties I stopped all activity and gained weight but then felt uncomfortable in my own skin so when I start to drop down my family was on my case. It was so discouraging that I stopped trying to lose weight until recently. I thought telling my co-workers instead of my family about my journey change would be different but I'm getting the same backlash. My favorite is when I tell somebody I can't have something it obviously it's because of my diet change. Couldn't be for any other reason (allergic, overly greasy, e tc)..2
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I feel a lot like a parrot, always having to repeat myself to the critics.
The fat didn't arrive overnight and it wont go overnight either....Weight loss is a long term commitment!4 -
By telling them about your weight loss plan, you have made it their business. I didn't tell anyone when I decided to lose weight, so it made it a lot harder for anyone to comment. Why open the door?11
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SuzySunshine99 wrote: »By telling them about your weight loss plan, you have made it their business. I didn't tell anyone when I decided to lose weight, so it made it a lot harder for anyone to comment. Why open the door?
Lol, this is a really good point!
I haven't actually mentioned anything to my family this time. Only my partner and one or two friends who I know will support me in a positive way. I'm getting any other support I need on here!2 -
The obesity crisis exists because there is a poor understanding of how weight is lost this include the medical field which has given me loads of bad advice.11
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I think when it was people I didn't see that often, I didn't care what everyone was thinking. But now I have a boyfriend who has never had a weight problem, and sometimes we have some tension because his advice is often misguided from things he has heard or read.
When I am not getting the results I want and I complain about it, these are some of his responses:
-Maybe you should try working out for a couple hours everyday, you would shred the weight then. (I workout for 40 minutes 4 times a week already lol)
-I bet if you quit drinking coffee, you would lose. (I drink maybe 120 calories a day in creamer with my coffee.)
-Do you think it's just genetics and that you were just meant to be this size?
-Do you want to bake some cookies?! Do you want me to bring home brownies?! Me: No, I don't need that. Him: Good, I'm just testing your willpower.
Ohhhh booo. He is sweet and supportive-- just clueless on weight-loss stuff.2 -
I think also that people comment on my stuff so much because I tend to be so open. Weight loss weighs on my mind a lot, and when something is working... I get really excited and talk about it. So I think people feel like they can comment on it all the time, because I probably comment on it all the time.2
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I have a little brother that dropped a lot of late while in high school between his freshman and Sophomore year. He did it through cutting the massive amount of calories he was ingesting through sugary drinks and candy. (He was the baby of the family and was spoiled
) He was active in sports and he went from being a round mound to being a very in shape/fit/healthy person. In college he got a degree in sports science and he gets the point and science behind it. If there is anyone in my family that should be listened to about weight loss and methods he would be it. (Calorie deficit, more activity, etc.) He'll even go as far as to suggest food choices (nothing is a "bad" food) that will help with satiation while managing to maintain a healthy deficit.
You would think that they would listen to him as a resource on the subject given education, and a walking talking living example, but Nope. It's all about Fasting, Weight Watcher, Whole30, Keto, etc. etc. as to being the golden ticket. And while their can be some validity in these diets its all about the CICO. I just wish family could grasp this because it makes me sad to see the yo-yo, and the effect it has on their lives.
I am currently on a journey to drop weight, having even bought into some BRO-Science myself about being bigger to build strength. Add Covid, and Gym's closing and I've turned the page, eating at a deficit etc. I've found that I just can't talk about it to anyone and then I don't get the unsolicited advice. I'm losing at a slow enough rate that no one can tell (unless they haven't seen me in awhile), that it's not even noticeable to them.
At the end of the day I've found that the people that give their opinions freely on weight loss are those that aren't as educated on it, are jealous, or are just plain negative people. Sometimes you just have to remove the haters, do your thing, and look to your true friends and find like minded people to get through.7 -
Yes my family does this all the time. In the past I have told them I'm on a weight loss journey and there was always something being said. If I didn't want to eat a certain thing it was, "oh I think I'm better and I hope you keep if off. " Super unnecessary. But, this time I have not mentioned it to anyone outside of my boyfriend and mom who are very supportive. I don't need the negativity or comments pertaining to what I am eating. I try not to let it bother me so much anymore if someone still decides to make a comment.2
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I'm very fortunate to not have any family members who are ever mean, rude, or intrusive about anything related to weight loss, but they definitely have fallen into some misinformation traps. Husband and I are in this together this time, both of us looking to lose about 40 lbs. I'm eating 1300-1500 cals a day, he's eating what I'm eating plus a protein bar and an extra snack because a 6'0" male needs more food than a 5'5" female.
Him: I'm eating too much. My metabolism is too slow. LOOK I'M GAINING WEIGHT.
Me: You lost 18 lbs of sweat in one football practice in high school. You don't have water weight fluctuations, you have full-on tides. It's been 2 weeks. You don't know what your weight is doing.
Him: Ok I lost five pounds today but I'm not gonna buy protein bars this week.
Me: Do you like having muscle? Shut up and eat the dang protein bar.
And then there's my mom.
Her: I'm doing keto!
Also her: *starts eating a Subway sandwich with 36 carbs in bread alone*
Me: *visible confusion*4 -
I've never told my family I'm losing weight, because I'm sure they would start full-on feeding me junk food or something if I told them, so I just have to slowly reduce the amount of food I eat each meal..2
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chocolate_owl wrote: »I'm very fortunate to not have any family members who are ever mean, rude, or intrusive about anything related to weight loss, but they definitely have fallen into some misinformation traps. Husband and I are in this together this time, both of us looking to lose about 40 lbs. I'm eating 1300-1500 cals a day, he's eating what I'm eating plus a protein bar and an extra snack because a 6'0" male needs more food than a 5'5" female.
Him: I'm eating too much. My metabolism is too slow. LOOK I'M GAINING WEIGHT.
Me: You lost 18 lbs of sweat in one football practice in high school. You don't have water weight fluctuations, you have full-on tides. It's been 2 weeks. You don't know what your weight is doing.
Him: Ok I lost five pounds today but I'm not gonna buy protein bars this week.
Me: Do you like having muscle? Shut up and eat the dang protein bar.
And then there's my mom.
Her: I'm doing keto!
Also her: *starts eating a Subway sandwich with 36 carbs in bread alone*
Me: *visible confusion*
Laughing because your husband and mom are my boyfriend rolled into one! He is always talking about how his metabolism slowed within the last 2 years. Meanwhile, I've never seen someone put away so much food in one sitting. But he's always talking about how much he used to be able to eat, and I think... how could it possibly be more than now?
He suggested we do keto a couple weeks ago... not realizing that everything he loves has carbs. Now, I am doing keto and he is eating all the carbs.3 -
My family have the idea that losing weight is pretty much straight forward and fat shaming is a big thing from a lot of my family members. I mostly get this from the older family members.3
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I guess I’m one of the lucky ones. My family is supportive. My husband doesn’t know what to do about counting calories but he tries real hard. He saves all the packages so I can scan them and weighs what he can. The rest of my family don’t pry. They know what I’m doing and support me in my journey. If I want a piece of cake they let me have it. If I decline then that’s fine too!2
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My family is very cool about what I'm doing. Mostly it's an exercise in patience for them. I'm all excited want to share every little thing that changes. BP is down, I see a vein, new PB run, whatever it is i'm like this all day. My poor wife is so tired of hearing about it, but everyone still smiles and says good job! They are bearing with me. I'm the annoying one.1
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I guess it's my fault, because whenever I try to lose weight, I have trouble keeping it to myself because I get excited.
This is the key to your problem.
Dont mention it, get excited to yourself (or on here!) - but as soon as you dont keep it to yourself, other people won't keep their opinions to themself either.1 -
My family is actually supporting me. At first they where annoyed that I had to scan things and said no to things. And my mom has been worried about me eating to little. But now she sees results. And when at times I do eat something which contains lots of calories like a cinnamon roll my dad jokes if I can really eat that.
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