Why do you care if people read your food diary?

I had several issues with food in my teens, being secretive about food has stayed with me, although I no longer eat in secret! Being honest about what I eat on a daily basis was the first step. I might be tempted to leave things out if it was open. Then I need to stop feeling ashamed by what I eat (even though it's at a deficit). Then I will share. I am not there yet.

I had mine open for awhile and got tired of the snarky judgy comments I would get about my food amounts and choices... I am very monogomus in what I eat - it does not bother me to eat the same foods over and over again, but apparently it bugs other people who have been on this site and more than one of them has tried to make an issue about it with me... after the 2nd or 3rd time, I closed the diary and solved the problem.

Lots of reasons.

I’ve been through (and discharged from) eating disorder treatment. The way I was eating in recovery was decided on with the RD in that program. Not the advice of mfp people who think they know best.

I work with a coach who helps me achieve various fitness goals. What I eat and when I eat it (stacking intake/certain macros in preparation for or recovery from certain events/workouts) is something we experiment with to find the best mix. Again-that’s something where his input matters and not the advice of mfp people who think they know best.

I am an endurance athlete with an unusual blood sugar issue (it goes very high during long runs). I also have cholesterol issues that respond well to a low fat diet. My diet focuses on managing both of these issues and not the advice of mfp people who think they know best.

On any day/week/month I may be eating at a deficit, or maintenance or a surplus - or banking calories or eating banked calories or anywhere in between. My calorie goal number may not reflect my actual calorie goal for the day. A 6000 calorie day may very well be planned and exactly correct for my goals. It may even be lower than what I needed to eat. An 800 calorie day may also be planned and perhaps high for where that day fits in my overall plan. My intake is based on a lot of factors that aren’t reflected in my diary - and not the advice of mfp people who think they know best.

I’ve been doing this 9 years. I’ve logged every meal, every day. I have a pretty good idea of what I need to eat, how I need to eat (timing/calorie distribution), my thresholds for satiety/performance/hunger, etc, and how various things affect me. I am not seeking any dietary advice. I don’t need comments suggesting that I should try some wheatgrass nonsense instead of coffee, or if I tried keto, or why is my sugar intake so high (on days I run 20+ miles and fuel it with....sugar) because that’s not good for me or the concerned comments that I’m only eating 1200 calories (my TDEE is 1600...) or “tomorrow is another day” or “do I have someone to talk to about my binge” because I ate 4000 (TDEE was 3800) and on and on and on and on and on.

So my diary has a passcode so the people whose input is valuable can access it. Everyone else has no reason to be in it and my life is 1000000000 times less stressful without the peanut gallery offering their input.

I will tell you what I ate if it makes that big a difference to you. Although I can’t imagine it would matter.

Because what I eat is private. Increasingly, our society has lost a normal sense of privacy. Unless I wish for some reason to broadcast exactly what I eat out to thousands of unknown strangers, what I eat is no one else’s business, as is how I dress, my bowel habits etc. It’s a strange world that expects everyone to be living on stage continually. It’s not healthy to expect such intimate knowledge of strangers, especially if they don’t wish to provide it. Boundaries exist for very good reasons.

Mostly because I would not recommend my diet to anyone. My sodium is sky high and I eat an excessive amount of fiber and artificial sweeteners.

domeofstars wrote: »

This is a question for the people who have their food diary set to private. I'm just wondering why you care if people read it?

And I wonder why people care that I have it private. So we're even.

Edited to add: thank you to all of the other people saying they'd be more likely to fudge if it was public. I'm the same way. There was a thing here for a while where people insisted you were hiding/lying if your diary wasn't open. Weird hill to die on.

When I joined around 7 years ago, diaries were automatically public. Then there was a change where new people automatically had their food diaries private. Mine is public. I was just too lazy to change it to private, besides not many understand it since most of my foods are Italian (I live in Rome). I've had very few comments on it over the years, but I wouldn't care. I also rarely look at someone elses unless they're posting about a problem. I don't care one way or another, and don't understand people that do. It's a personal choice and I respect the decision.

eatyogarun wrote: »

domeofstars wrote: »

This is a question for the people who have their food diary set to private. I'm just wondering why you care if people read it?

And I wonder why people care that I have it private. So we're even.

Edited to add: thank you to all of the other people saying they'd be more likely to fudge if it was public. I'm the same way. There was a thing here for a while where people insisted you were hiding/lying if your diary wasn't open. Weird hill to die on.

Yes there was too.

Along with that other thing that bothers some people : if your avatar is not a photo of yourself.

It has happened to me once when my diary was open, in a thread about daylights saving or doctors being overweight or people wearing make up to the gym or something* and someone posted why should I value your opinion when you only eat x amounts protein per day.



* can't remember exact thread topic but absolutely nothing to do with my diary or how I eat or anything about me personally.

What I don't understand is people who send friend requests, but have closed diary, closed profile page (can't see anything they might post on their page or any status updates), never send PMs. Whazzat about? 😉 I don't care, still accept the FR, but . . . mysterious!

My diary is open to MFP friends. (I'm a terrible MFP friend, pretty much ignore that feed.) From comments and occasional questions, it's clear that some people read it. On threads where people have asked about getting protein as a veg, I've told folks they can FR me if they want to see what I eat, as a long-term ovo-lacto veg with a moderately high protein goal who dislikes protein powder/bars. (I don't think that explains the mystery people.)

I'm not likely to posture via fudging my diary; that seems silly to me. I post what I eat: That's simpler, and food shame is not really my thing. I skip logging the occasional day (and it's usually a high day, because eating a bunch of usual stuff is logistically more complicated/time-consuming, and skipping the rare day is NBD in long-term maintenance, I've learned). But I've logged any number of ill-advised eating/drinking choices, and not gotten criticism. Maybe my MFP friends know how that would turn out? 😉 ( I haven't even had judge-y questions . . . I think someone asked me how I liked a particular flavored vodka or something like that once, but that's about it).

Other people can open or close their diaries, mostly I don't care . . . but people who evangelize in an aggressive/obnoxious way about a particular eating style and how we all ought to adopt it, I admit I'm kind of amused when they have totally closed diaries, though there's no rational basis for amusement.

I think it's nice when someone has a profile photo that isn't the default gray face, because the uniqueness makes it easier to follow threads sometimes. I find it confusing when the profile photo is of a human that I don't recognize (may be a celeb I don't know, maybe), and the photo is wildly different from the person who's posting. (I don't think it's wrong for them to use those profile photos, though. The confusion is my problem, not theirs.) I'm suspicious - perhaps also irrationally - in the rare case when someone posts repeatedly in a pseudo-oracular way about their glorious fitness routine and its amazing physical benefits for them, but never posts a personal photo anywhere (profile or threads).

Thank you. I really enjoyed reading through this thread. Lots of personal insights.

I am someone who doesn’t participate in social media and appreciates anonymity, which is getting harder and harder to achieve. I have nothing to hide (most days 😋😝🤣). I just don’t need or want to be judged by, acknowledged, recognized by random people.

Back to the topic at hand... if someone wants to see my food diary I would most likely allow them access. Why they would, is beyond me. Unfortunately I too have struggled with an eating disorder and too many comments on what I am doing get in my head and can send me off course.