Blocking creeps
Queen_Celeste
Posts: 33 Member
Is there a way to block people in the app? I can only find the unfriend option, but they keep sending friend requests and then have a completely locked down account and start sending tons of messages as soon as you accept a friend request. It's getting frustrating!
6
Replies
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You can block on the website - not sure if you can on the app.3
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You can remove them as friends. You can also report them, if they do things that are against the terms of service. (Doing that can help prevent them harassing others, if it's inappropriate messages.)
I usually do a little vetting, before accepting friend requests, by looking at their profile in the web version. I don't accept FRs from men who *only* have attractive women on their friend list, or have completely closed profiles, or whose history (via search) on the Community forums is . . . flirty, or just generally regrettable. That's the subset that's been the most likely to be inappropriate, in my experience.18 -
Yep agree with everything that AnnPT77 said. Vet them, research them, before accepting requests. I am sure you can block them. Or just tell them you are not interested then ignore them they will soon move on.3
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When I click on a name, I get a button that says "ignore" next to the button that says "send message". What does that do? I've never used it.
If your issue is random folks, you may want to consider a name and profile pic that's more ambiguous.6 -
manderson27 wrote: »Yep agree with everything that AnnPT77 said. Vet them, research them, before accepting requests. I am sure you can block them. Or just tell them you are not interested then ignore them they will soon move on.
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You can remove them as friends. You can also report them, if they do things that are against the terms of service. (Doing that can help prevent them harassing others, if it's inappropriate messages.)
I usually do a little vetting, before accepting friend requests, by looking at their profile in the web version. I don't accept FRs from men who *only* have attractive women on their friend list, or have completely closed profiles, or whose history (via search) on the Community forums is . . . flirty, or just generally regrettable. That's the subset that's been the most likely to be inappropriate, in my experience.
I'd be blocked... a lot 😭
Conversely, I don't friend 99.999% of the time on MFP and prefer to keep conversation here on the main forums or in the sub-groups. Life, for my brain, is less complicated this way and I can't possibly think how a DM convo could not be of benefit to a public/wider chat.5 -
bold_rabbit wrote: »When I click on a name, I get a button that says "ignore" next to the button that says "send message". What does that do? I've never used it.
If your issue is random folks, you may want to consider a name and profile pic that's more ambiguous.
Using the Ignore feature will make that particular person's posts in the forum invisible to you. Handy if someone's posts consistently gets your back up.
The fly in this ointment, however, is that if another member quotes that person (probably to tell them how 'misinformed' they are), you *will* see your ignored person's post captured in the quote. So this feature is good from far, but far from good.
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psychod787 wrote: »manderson27 wrote: »Yep agree with everything that AnnPT77 said. Vet them, research them, before accepting requests. I am sure you can block them. Or just tell them you are not interested then ignore them they will soon move on.
You can lurk in my bushes anytime. I will bring you out a sammich and a beer.
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snickerscharlie wrote: »bold_rabbit wrote: »When I click on a name, I get a button that says "ignore" next to the button that says "send message". What does that do? I've never used it.
If your issue is random folks, you may want to consider a name and profile pic that's more ambiguous.
Using the Ignore feature will make that particular person's posts in the forum invisible to you. Handy if someone's posts consistently gets your back up.
The fly in this ointment, however, is that if another member quotes that person (probably to tell them how 'misinformed' they are), you *will* see your ignored person's post captured in the quote. So this feature is good from far, but far from good.
Hey, thanks. As I said, I didn't know what it did. I appreciate the clarification.1 -
psychod787 wrote: »manderson27 wrote: »Yep agree with everything that AnnPT77 said. Vet them, research them, before accepting requests. I am sure you can block them. Or just tell them you are not interested then ignore them they will soon move on.
Rolling ROFL's I howled.1 -
manderson27 wrote: »psychod787 wrote: »manderson27 wrote: »Yep agree with everything that AnnPT77 said. Vet them, research them, before accepting requests. I am sure you can block them. Or just tell them you are not interested then ignore them they will soon move on.
You can lurk in my bushes anytime. I will bring you out a sammich and a beer.
Turkey and cheese with a brown English ale please! Ill stay all week!2 -
bold_rabbit wrote: »When I click on a name, I get a button that says "ignore" next to the button that says "send message". What does that do? I've never used it.
If your issue is random folks, you may want to consider a name and profile pic that's more ambiguous.
this is victim blaming and shaming and i must point that out to you or the world will never change. this problem is not her using her picture or name. the problem is random creeps sending relentless and unwelcomed messages. that is not her fault.11 -
I have had success lately telling people I am here to log my food and take control of my health- not flirt or anything else. Once I say that I never hear from them again. It is a shame and leads me to not want to accept anyone because frankly I don’t feel like spending the time to vet folks.4
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I never accept male friend requests..(sorry guys..the creepers are there). and I never accept a friend request from anyone who you can tell just made their profile and you can tell they're selling something.6
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I very rarely accept friend requests anymore. And I never accept ones that don't include a little note, because they clearly haven't even bothered to read my profile which requests them to do so.
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snickerscharlie wrote: »I very rarely accept friend requests anymore. And I never accept ones that don't include a little note, because they clearly haven't even bothered to read my profile which requests them to do so.
I started to do this too because one of the first requests I got was from a really handsome, fit dude, who when I googled the image, is some poor fella whose picture has been stolen many times and used for scamming women on sites like this and dating sites. I am very wary of handsome fit dudes since being on another site when I kept getting requests from men who I was then informed by the site had been removed due to unsavory activity on their part. I guess overweight middle aged women are a prime target.
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peggy_polenta wrote: »bold_rabbit wrote: »When I click on a name, I get a button that says "ignore" next to the button that says "send message". What does that do? I've never used it.
If your issue is random folks, you may want to consider a name and profile pic that's more ambiguous.
this is victim blaming and shaming and i must point that out to you or the world will never change. this problem is not her using her picture or name. the problem is random creeps sending relentless and unwelcomed messages. that is not her fault.
Not saying that anything this person did was wrong. I personally believe harassing ladies or gents on the forums is just wrong.... BUT..... if I walk into a forest wearing a porkchop around my neck, knowing there could be wolves there , then..... anyways.... 1 -
psychod787 wrote: »peggy_polenta wrote: »bold_rabbit wrote: »When I click on a name, I get a button that says "ignore" next to the button that says "send message". What does that do? I've never used it.
If your issue is random folks, you may want to consider a name and profile pic that's more ambiguous.
this is victim blaming and shaming and i must point that out to you or the world will never change. this problem is not her using her picture or name. the problem is random creeps sending relentless and unwelcomed messages. that is not her fault.
Not saying that anything this person did was wrong. I personally believe harassing ladies or gents on the forums is just wrong.... BUT..... if I walk into a forest wearing a porkchop around my neck, knowing there could be wolves there , then..... anyways....
Honestly, a lot of women are just tired of the BS. Losing our tempers is an effect of that. "What were you wearing" is still too often asked of women who are harassed or assaulted. Hardly anyone asks people who are mugged/robbed "how much money did you have in your wallet" or "did you flash a wad of cash right before that at a store".
Showing up here on MFP, being female, or even being fit and female and having a photo that reveals that femaleness and fitness . . . that is reasonable, normal behavior that no one should have to defend, ever. (I'm not talking about glamor photos with come-hither smiles and close-ish photo views deep down into the cleavage . . . though I think actual harassment is still about *the harasser* in those cases, too.)
We should not have to stop posting female profile photos (or female-looking user names) out of fear that some guy is going be a jerk, possibly a dangerous or threatening one (that's more an IRL thing than an issue on an international site like this, though at extremes doxing happens). That potential implied threat element is (I strongly suspect) much less an issue in men who get truly unwelcome come-ons from women.
I think you have a limited understanding - probably because you're a decent sort of a guy - how truly little (no) provocation a woman needs to exhibit, in order for annoying creepy BS to happen. Happen all the time? To everyone? No. Way too often, though. The problem is the harassers. Some men are complete, entitled, arrogant, frigging jerks. All? No, far from it. Minority. But too many. Zero would be ideal.
Look at the OP's profile photo. (It was the one I saw here on the first day I visited this thread, so I suspect it was the one that caused someone to say "you may want to consider a name and profile pic that's more ambiguous".) She looks like a nice, attractive woman. But a come-on? Lacivious in some way?
True across most of the profile photos in this thread, too, on posts by women who're reporting encounters here with creeps, and strategies for avoiding them. Just nice people's faces, generally.
Pork chop? Please!
(My profile photo is the most revealing or lacivious of the lot, on this thread, on this day: Li'l ol' lady's shoulder, with clothing/straps not in frame, revealing nothing even remotely unsuitable to display on the street. So provocative! 🙄)12 -
psychod787 wrote: »peggy_polenta wrote: »bold_rabbit wrote: »When I click on a name, I get a button that says "ignore" next to the button that says "send message". What does that do? I've never used it.
If your issue is random folks, you may want to consider a name and profile pic that's more ambiguous.
this is victim blaming and shaming and i must point that out to you or the world will never change. this problem is not her using her picture or name. the problem is random creeps sending relentless and unwelcomed messages. that is not her fault.
Not saying that anything this person did was wrong. I personally believe harassing ladies or gents on the forums is just wrong.... BUT..... if I walk into a forest wearing a porkchop around my neck, knowing there could be wolves there , then..... anyways....
Honestly, a lot of women are just tired of the BS. Losing our tempers is an effect of that. "What were you wearing" is still too often asked of women who are harassed or assaulted. Hardly anyone asks people who are mugged/robbed "how much money did you have in your wallet" or "did you flash a wad of cash right before that at a store".
Showing up here on MFP, being female, or even being fit and female and having a photo that reveals that femaleness and fitness . . . that is reasonable, normal behavior that no one should have to defend, ever. (I'm not talking about glamor photos with come-hither smiles and close-ish photo views deep down into the cleavage . . . though I think actual harassment is still about *the harasser* in those cases, too.)
We should not have to stop posting female profile photos (or female-looking user names) out of fear that some guy is going be a jerk, possibly a dangerous or threatening one (that's more an IRL thing than an issue on an international site like this, though at extremes doxing happens). That potential implied threat element is (I strongly suspect) much less an issue in men who get truly unwelcome come-ons from women.
I think you have a limited understanding - probably because you're a decent sort of a guy - how truly little (no) provocation a woman needs to exhibit, in order for annoying creepy BS to happen. Happen all the time? To everyone? No. Way too often, though. The problem is the harassers. Some men are complete, entitled, arrogant, frigging jerks. All? No, far from it. Minority. But too many. Zero would be ideal.
Look at the OP's profile photo. (It was the one I saw here on the first day I visited this thread, so I suspect it was the one that caused someone to say "you may want to consider a name and profile pic that's more ambiguous".) She looks like a nice, attractive woman. But a come-on? Lacivious in some way?
True across most of the profile photos in this thread, too, on posts by women who're reporting encounters here with creeps, and strategies for avoiding them. Just nice people's faces, generally.
Pork chop? Please!
(My profile photo is the most revealing or lacivious of the lot, on this thread, on this day: Li'l ol' lady's shoulder, with clothing/straps not in frame, revealing nothing even remotely unsuitable to display on the street. So provocative! 🙄)
All this is very true. I also believe that people of all sexes should be free to do as they wish without being bothered by others. I wished we lived in a perfect world where people didn't have to put up BS, unfortunately it never will be perfect. I have traveled in the third world, hell even in the US, to places I know I don't flaunt any kind of wealth because I know there will be people there who will harass me or worse. This coming from a 6'3" 200+lb man who works in a dangerous environment. I will truly never know exactly what it feels like being a woman in our current society. I was born and identify as a cis gender, straight, white male. I have experienced some of it. Moonlighting in an all women's correctional facility, I have been cat called and harassed non stop. Then there is working in a male one.... not even going to repeat what's been said to me. On a closing note, those males that do harass women online are not really men. Most are little boys that don't have the fortitude to even speak to a women in real life. So, they compensate by bothering people here. I have been learning about the incel and red pill movements, along with radical feminism. Much love aunt granny as always!2 -
psychod787 wrote: »psychod787 wrote: »peggy_polenta wrote: »bold_rabbit wrote: »When I click on a name, I get a button that says "ignore" next to the button that says "send message". What does that do? I've never used it.
If your issue is random folks, you may want to consider a name and profile pic that's more ambiguous.
this is victim blaming and shaming and i must point that out to you or the world will never change. this problem is not her using her picture or name. the problem is random creeps sending relentless and unwelcomed messages. that is not her fault.
Not saying that anything this person did was wrong. I personally believe harassing ladies or gents on the forums is just wrong.... BUT..... if I walk into a forest wearing a porkchop around my neck, knowing there could be wolves there , then..... anyways....
Honestly, a lot of women are just tired of the BS. Losing our tempers is an effect of that. "What were you wearing" is still too often asked of women who are harassed or assaulted. Hardly anyone asks people who are mugged/robbed "how much money did you have in your wallet" or "did you flash a wad of cash right before that at a store".
Showing up here on MFP, being female, or even being fit and female and having a photo that reveals that femaleness and fitness . . . that is reasonable, normal behavior that no one should have to defend, ever. (I'm not talking about glamor photos with come-hither smiles and close-ish photo views deep down into the cleavage . . . though I think actual harassment is still about *the harasser* in those cases, too.)
We should not have to stop posting female profile photos (or female-looking user names) out of fear that some guy is going be a jerk, possibly a dangerous or threatening one (that's more an IRL thing than an issue on an international site like this, though at extremes doxing happens). That potential implied threat element is (I strongly suspect) much less an issue in men who get truly unwelcome come-ons from women.
I think you have a limited understanding - probably because you're a decent sort of a guy - how truly little (no) provocation a woman needs to exhibit, in order for annoying creepy BS to happen. Happen all the time? To everyone? No. Way too often, though. The problem is the harassers. Some men are complete, entitled, arrogant, frigging jerks. All? No, far from it. Minority. But too many. Zero would be ideal.
Look at the OP's profile photo. (It was the one I saw here on the first day I visited this thread, so I suspect it was the one that caused someone to say "you may want to consider a name and profile pic that's more ambiguous".) She looks like a nice, attractive woman. But a come-on? Lacivious in some way?
True across most of the profile photos in this thread, too, on posts by women who're reporting encounters here with creeps, and strategies for avoiding them. Just nice people's faces, generally.
Pork chop? Please!
(My profile photo is the most revealing or lacivious of the lot, on this thread, on this day: Li'l ol' lady's shoulder, with clothing/straps not in frame, revealing nothing even remotely unsuitable to display on the street. So provocative! 🙄)
All this is very true. I also believe that people of all sexes should be free to do as they wish without being bothered by others. I wished we lived in a perfect world where people didn't have to put up BS, unfortunately it never will be perfect. I have traveled in the third world, hell even in the US, to places I know I don't flaunt any kind of wealth because I know there will be people there who will harass me or worse. This coming from a 6'3" 200+lb man who works in a dangerous environment. I will truly never know exactly what it feels like being a woman in our current society. I was born and identify as a cis gender, straight, white male. I have experienced some of it. Moonlighting in an all women's correctional facility, I have been cat called and harassed non stop. Then there is working in a male one.... not even going to repeat what's been said to me. On a closing note, those males that do harass women online are not really men. Most are little boys that don't have the fortitude to even speak to a women in real life. So, they compensate by bothering people here. I have been learning about the incel and red pill movements, along with radical feminism. Much love aunt granny as always!
Right back atcha (and I should've said as much in my PP). You can visit me, after your stint with manderson27, and name your menu if you're tired of ham sammie and brown ale. 😉 Might wanna wait for Spring, though.0 -
So what we should do is report creepy behaviour and such posters get banned.
Not blame women for normal photos and normal user names.5
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