PLEASE HELP
AnonymouslyFree
Posts: 26 Member
First off, hi everyone. 
I'm new to this and need some help and / or pointers for my new journey. A little background info on me. I am a 35 yr old female, no kids and just started getting serious about my weight loss this year. I am not on any social media platforms but am thinking I could use some encouragement here..This introvert needs some healthy-minded friends!... I want to be completely honest. I was pretty muscular and fit in high school (cheerleading-flyer) and hated how strong I looked even though I was healthy. I'm only 5'0 so any weight or muscle on me makes me look huge in my eyes. 50lbs on a short person looks like 100lbs. Anyway, after highschool I started not eating and loved the way I looked. Before you criticize, I KNOW THIS IS NOT A HEALTHY WAY OF THINKING. So for starving and loving my body for most of my 20's, I made a change when I turned 30. I got a serious boyfriend who loved me regardless and I started eating. Whatever I wanted. Whenever I wanted. I over did it, big time. Here I am 5 years later, 50 lbs heavier missing my 110lb frame even if I got there completely the wrong way. I made up my mind to lose the weight naturally, with diet and exercise and this will be the first time I am approaching losing weight in a healthy way. I realized today, I need support, I need someone to encourage me and let me bounce ideas and questions off of. I started calorie counting and light exercise on Jan 4th and as of today, I've lost 10lbs!! I know I'm doing something right but still have cravings and feel guilt when I have a cheat meal. I'm still learning this app, but please reach out if your looking for a friend to help encourage you as well. I'm serious about my health this time and something feels different. Here's to everyone on here trying to better themselves the right way!! You have inspired me.
I'm new to this and need some help and / or pointers for my new journey. A little background info on me. I am a 35 yr old female, no kids and just started getting serious about my weight loss this year. I am not on any social media platforms but am thinking I could use some encouragement here..This introvert needs some healthy-minded friends!... I want to be completely honest. I was pretty muscular and fit in high school (cheerleading-flyer) and hated how strong I looked even though I was healthy. I'm only 5'0 so any weight or muscle on me makes me look huge in my eyes. 50lbs on a short person looks like 100lbs. Anyway, after highschool I started not eating and loved the way I looked. Before you criticize, I KNOW THIS IS NOT A HEALTHY WAY OF THINKING. So for starving and loving my body for most of my 20's, I made a change when I turned 30. I got a serious boyfriend who loved me regardless and I started eating. Whatever I wanted. Whenever I wanted. I over did it, big time. Here I am 5 years later, 50 lbs heavier missing my 110lb frame even if I got there completely the wrong way. I made up my mind to lose the weight naturally, with diet and exercise and this will be the first time I am approaching losing weight in a healthy way. I realized today, I need support, I need someone to encourage me and let me bounce ideas and questions off of. I started calorie counting and light exercise on Jan 4th and as of today, I've lost 10lbs!! I know I'm doing something right but still have cravings and feel guilt when I have a cheat meal. I'm still learning this app, but please reach out if your looking for a friend to help encourage you as well. I'm serious about my health this time and something feels different. Here's to everyone on here trying to better themselves the right way!! You have inspired me. 18
Replies
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Glad you are here! You can do it!3
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Good luck!
You can find lots of different types of support here. I suggest reading the boards and finding some people with similar background, preferences, and goals. But don't get stuck thinking there's only one way that works. Try different ways to lose weight and be healthier.
So for instance, like you I was fit when I was younger, but unlike you I didn't think I needed to be thinner. And many people on this site have been overweight since they were pre-teen, so they see their bodies differently. I think the slower you lose the weight, the more your body becomes adjusted to the new weight and the more likely that you'll keep it off. But for some people, going too slowly causes them to lose motivation.
So when I say find people who are similar, I mean those with similar issues, but maybe not the same solutions. Try a variety of things to see what works for you. For instance, a higher fiber diet seems to help for me. Lots of water helps some people. There's quite a bit of research indicating that tracking what you eat is important for losing weight - some people make themselves write the food down before they eat it.
Find out what type of exercise you can enjoy and stick with for a long time. I can eat 100 calories much faster than I can work it off, but the exercise still helps to keep me healthy and gets me close to my real goal of feeling more healthy and fit.5 -
OP I am not sure 10lbs loss in just under 3 weeks would be considered healthy...or sustainable. How many calories are you eating every day and how much exercise are you doing?
Also if you ever have had eating disordered thinking, then you need to address this before any dieting as this type of problem does not just go because you wish it to...it is psychological and triggers and stresses can set you off down that path in no time again. It sounds like you are struggling already, as you feel guilt, etc and cravings....are you heavily restricting the types of food you eat? I eat chocolate, icecream, cake, sweets....you can eat things that fit your calorie and macro goals. Are you eating enough protein and fat?
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Agree with nexangelus, 3+ pounds per week, for a 160 lb. person is nearly 2% of your bodyweight per week. A realistic, healthy & sustainable goal, for most people, is 0.5% - 1.0% per week. For you that would be approximately 0.8 to 1.6 lbs. per week. Much, MUCH more healthy and sustainable. I got to my goal FAST many times and gained it all back each time because I didn't learn how to eat sensibly. This time I got to my goal slowly and I've kept the weight off for a year and a half now and can comfortably maintain my current/goal weight. Stay strong!6
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Welcome! I'm not going to worry about ten pounds of loss in three weeks if it's at the start of a diet. Many times that's partly fat but partly water or (ahem) excess food as the body adjusts to being treated right. I agree with what everyone else says about sustainable continuing losses. I lost a fair amount at first too and then the losses steadied down.
Regarding not wanting to look overly muscular, it seems to me that cheerleading involves a lot of explosive movement (jumping, leaping, lifting, etc) so what you'd probably want to focus on is something that gets you movement, maybe even weight lifting, but not with explosive movements. (many people use those to build muscle bulk.) Power lifting for example builds lean, hard, slim looking muscles, especially in women. There's a thread about that here actually. (Not the same as body building where people go for size.) Yoga, Pilates, running, swimming, those also might build the body you want. Definitely try out different things and good luck on your journey!7 -
OP here. Not sure how to reply to those above directly so hopefully you all are still reading this thread. I agree that 10lbs in 3 weeks is a lot and could be concern for some but must admit it's extremely motivating. I will detail what I've been doing to get your thoughts on if it's a healthy pursuit or not. I am currently only doing 1000 calories a day, sometimes a little over. I asked for a treadmill for my birthday over 2 years ago and my loving boyfriend got me one. It sat unused and dusty until January 4th of this year. I went from eating a few thousand calories a day with 0 exercise to waking on the treadmill for 30 minutes everyday, plus 30 minutes of floor stretching, and light weight exercises. For food, I am still having my mocha k cup with creamer every morning, never really been a breakfast person, lunch usually cucumbers with basalmic dressing, bananas, strawberries, weight watcher food, turkey sticks, string cheese ext.. dinners have been mostly chicken breast or boneless pork cutlets, marinated, with a side of steamer veggies, asparagus. Etc...i have had a cheat meal at least once a week including spaghetti, Mexican food at a restaurant, margaritas, and chips and salsa. One person replied that my guilt is my old eating disorder raring it's ugly head again and I couldn't agree more. I realize that mindset will always be laying low inside me. I do feel I'm being responsible with eating now though so please share your thoughts if you agree or disagree. One thing that makes losing weight feel obtainable this time is I am not restricting myself from everything I enjoy. (I tried keto for 14 days and HATED not being able to enjoy fruit, bread, etc) I am not a weight watchers member but anyone can buy their packaged products through their shop so I snack on 60 cal chocolate bars, chips, etc...I hope this alleviated some worry for some posters above and keep the thoughts coming, I so appreciate the support! ❤3
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Hi OP!
You may want to consider bumping up your calories a bit - 1000 is pretty low. Here's the reasons why though! Not only do you want to fuel your body properly and give it the energy it needs to maintain health, but it's also pretty hard to get the right nutrition on a thousand calories. Since you are 5', 1200 or a little more could work very well for you. I'm 5'3" and usually eat 1200-1500 calories a day. You'll also have less problems with loose skin or saggy parts that way.
If you eat too little, after a while your body may become used to existing on less calories so when you hit a plateau then you have no room to reduce. There are some great calculators online, a good target is usually TDEE - 20% or thereabouts. TDEE is how many calories you burn in a day, Total Daily Energy Expenditure. That way you can eat reasonable portions of things you love including treats, you'll still lose weight, and you'll have fuel for running around and doing the things you love.
I wish you the best!9 -
I understand people's concern about weight loss, but has no one ever lost/gained a lot of weight overnight from water weight? Periods? Take out food hello :P And we understand that isn't 'true' fat being gained/lost.
All the concerned people and I haven't seen one suggest seeing a doctor, just to get a good frame of what is really healthy. Weight isn't everything. I was once unhealthy at 130 pounds size 9, then strong and super fit at 145 size 6. Our bodies are so different and complex that ultimately, checking with a doctor, and/or finding your BMI and TDEE from a professional can go a long way.
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I understand people's concern about weight loss, but has no one ever lost/gained a lot of weight overnight from water weight? Periods? Take out food hello :P And we understand that isn't 'true' fat being gained/lost.
All the concerned people and I haven't seen one suggest seeing a doctor, just to get a good frame of what is really healthy. Weight isn't everything. I was once unhealthy at 130 pounds size 9, then strong and super fit at 145 size 6. Our bodies are so different and complex that ultimately, checking with a doctor, and/or finding your BMI and TDEE from a professional can go a long way.
Actually I did recommend seeking help addressing the eating disordered thinking which is what the OP s expressing by eating so low and feeling guilty, etc....1000 cals per day IS TOO LOW, no doubt about it....2 -
Fun fact: I went to a local weight loss place to get some help about a year ago. They are a well known company called Metabolic Research and they assist with healthy eating and supplements. (Or so I thought)
They recommended I go on a 700/day calorie diet along with taking high levels of HCG. I of course knew how crazy that sounded and left immediately...but please consider that I was referred to this place by my own doctor!! They do tell you low calorie diets are ok for someone my size, so to me 1,000 /day does not seem unreasonable. For a 5ft person like me, according to docs, a normal weight is between 97lbs--123lbs. Anything over 123lb is considered overweight and that has been notated in my medical charts before.1 -
OP women of any size, you said you weighed in at 160 bs, your size is irrelevant to your weight you are now, apart from setting a goal weight and HEALTHY weight/fat loss goal....
1200 cals per day is the recommended MINIMUM for women full stop....net calories....
According to the TDEE website (and the info you gave us in your post) you need 1783 cals per day to MAINTAIN your current weight of 150 lbs. So to lose 1 lbs per week a cut/deficit of 500 cals per day is reasonable, that puts you at 1283 cals per day.
If you think 1000 per day is okay and healthy, sustainable, etc then why are you asking for our help and advice, you seem to want us to say eating 1000 cals per day and losing 3 + lbs per week is okay. It is not in the long run....a few of us have already pointed this out.
Carry on....3 -
I certainly did not mean to stir up so much controversy and I do appreciate the feedback and information. Looking back to my "skinny days", I do recall friends saying I looked "too skinny" but then my doctor would say I was in "great shape" and "healthy", so it's odd that those types of comments come from people who are licensed and qualified to give such advice.
I will continue looking into what is the healthiest recommendation for my personal weight loss plan. You would think if what I was logging on this app was so wrong, it would let you know, but low and behold, I'm getting badges instead. 🤷♀️3 -
I read that going, wait, is that me?? I was the same way. I am also 5'0" and struggled with disordered eating since I was a child. I hit my lowest weight at 18 and was threatened with hospitalization. Then I had a major traumatic experience and something switched.
I met my now husband after it, we had kids, and after the kids I looked down and realized I had put on so much weight. My highest being 160. I've been working on my eating for about a year before I could really start calorie tracking. My old disordered habits kept coming back while I restricted, then I would go to my "new" disordered habits of binging.
I would say that I am just now finally at a place where I am able to track without over restricting. I am definitely keeping my calories pretty tight. But I found that if I eat over 1500, it triggers binges. Just like eating under 1100 triggers restricting. I still have my days where I eat over or eat under, but they are so few compared to my past. It is a constant struggle daily.
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Thank you so much for this reply. I needed to hear that I am not alone. I've been SO proud of the 10lbs I've lost so far, but this post has me feeling slightly bad about it now. I never got skinny enough that people threatened me with interventions or anything, but ate just enough to keep some weight on and made sure to eat in front of people if they ever started questioning my eating habits. I don't plan on staying on a low cal diet forever. This is the hard part that I'm going through right now. Once I've lost all the extra lbs, I will be able to up my calories to maintain my weight which is the most exciting part of this journey. I miss pizza. And margaritas. And mexican food, my ulimate weakness. Lol..
Hearing your story has definitely inspired me. I'm so glad you overcame that and live a healthy, happy life. Thank you so much for sharing . ❤2 -
I am also 5’0, high weight was 161, started MFP again Jan 1 at 155 and have lost 6lbs.
I might get heat for this but I don’t understand how people can say 1200 is the minimum for all women....some women are 5’10 or more and how can their absolute minimum be the same as our absolute minimum at 5’0? I truly don’t understand that.
I eat between 1000-1200 each day and when I’m eating whole healthy (for the most part) foods I am completely satisfied and don’t feel hungry or like I’m lacking anything. I feel most satiated on high volume low calorie foods.6 -
Congrats Tiffani! You are killing it! I agree with everything you said. I hit my calories today with HEALTHY food, didn't have any hunger pangs and feel amazing and energized enough to walk on the treadmill! I SO appreciate the responses I've gotten from woman just like me. Being heavy feels miserable at any size, but hearing from other 5'0 woman out there is so encouraging. Thank you for sharing! ❤2
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Hi. I’m also 5’. Started at 159.8 on January 1. I weigh myself once a week on Saturday so as of last week I had lost 3.2 lbs, which I think is great for two weeks! I eat between 1300-1400 calories, more if I exercise. I’m pretty sedentary during the week working from home. Going slower on the weight loss helps me stick with it. I get hangry headaches too so if I get too hungry I’ll binge.4
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I know you can do it and YOU know you can do it. Recall the hard work and conditioning you must have done for cheerleading. Make this a high priority. Commit to it for a month. Allow no excuses. Then evaluate the results.
I started Jan. 7 and have lost 5 pounds. Due to high blood pressure I started on the DASH diet (recommended by American Heart Association) and also doing cardio.
MFP has helped in planning meals to ensure the correct balance between carb, fat and protein. For the DASH diet it is 55% carb, 27% fat, 18% protein. My goal is 50%, 25%, 20%. The most IMPORTANT lesson I've learned is making sure every meal has a BALANCE between those 3 macro-nutrients. (FYI DASH also stresses lower sodium.) MFP does require Premium subscription to see carbs, fat and protein in percentages. That's been very helpful. I do have disappointments in other areas of MFP (but that's off-topic).
This diet may change your life. I wish you great success.2 -
Jpedno, thanks for sharing. I'm also working from home which has been a daily steps killer so I've been walking around my house and up and down the stairs. Gotta do what we gotta do! Lol Congrats on your weight loss, you're doing great!! I get the whole hangry binge thing. I keep low cal snacks around to fight off those urges. The weight watchers shop sells some YUMMY chocolate bars that are only 60 cals and seriously tastes like chocolate. Their little shop was an awesome find as I'm not a member but was able to get loaded up on guilt free snacks! Good luck to you on your journey!!2
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AnonymouslyFree wrote: »Jpedno, thanks for sharing. I'm also working from home which has been a daily steps killer so I've been walking around my house and up and down the stairs. Gotta do what we gotta do! Lol Congrats on your weight loss, you're doing great!! I get the whole hangry binge thing. I keep low cal snacks around to fight off those urges. The weight watchers shop sells some YUMMY chocolate bars that are only 60 cals and seriously tastes like chocolate. Their little shop was an awesome find as I'm not a member but was able to get loaded up on guilt free snacks! Good luck to you on your journey!!
OP- I can promise you, if you want results that are more likely to last, and in a healthy way, you need to listen to the veterans here, who can explain the science. I was a dancer my whole life, I know what you think and how you think because I was there. Until I came in and finally listened (it took awhile) nothing ever worked. I tried everything but their advice, believe me. Best place to start is the General Health, Fitness and Diet page (this page is for success stories) and read the stickies at the top. You will be obsessed! It will change your life. You got this girl! You’ll kill this if you ignore the trendy woo and focus on sustainable CICO ❤️7 -
Hey there!
First of all I totally get ya. I was the skinny girl my whole life but the weight packed on these past few years. I'm also losing weight the healthy way now, I starved many times but realize this is what is good for my body and what I need. Feel free to add me!0 -
Hi, I am also 5' 0" and I recall losing 4 pound in my first week of MFP (when I weighed 8stone 7 pounds). The following week I lost 3 pounds. I love MFP for all its uses and help, but if I'm honest, when I asked for advice (only two or three times) I did not feel the love (if you know what I mean!) by some of the replies......like you, I felt a bit low about what some members had typed. I wish you well, you have started your journey and good luck-you can do it HEALTHILY, I have maintained my goal for several years now. I monitor my calorie input and have 1400 cals per day and exercise to do this and reduce to 1200 cals daily if I have overindulged (Christmas for example) to return to goal weight. Stay safe and do not be put off by some of the comments, I guess they are only trying to help.2
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It's a marathon, not a sprint. The goal is to create sustaining habits that will serve you well for the rest of your life. Each day is a new day. Don't worry about yesterday or tomorrow. Focus on today and do the best you can. I have found that focusing on macros as well as calories made a HUGE difference for me. I didn't cut out any one thing. I reduced the amount of sugar I ate (to 25 grams) and my carbs (to around 100 grams) and I increased my fat (butter, olive oil, natural peanut butter with no sugar) and I try to eat protein at every meal. Also, by eating sugar, carb with protein it didn't run through me and make me crave more. BTW you need sugar and carbs to help make serotonin and dopamine and to help you have a healthy gut. I also create a 2 week meal plan, shopping list and I try to be very strict with staying in my macro lane Monday to Friday. I allowed myself to have "normal food" (take-out, pizza, Five Guys, etc.) one meal on the weekend. I do have cravings. One time, I had a craving for Krispy Kreme jelly filled donuts, so I drove there and got a fresh box (dozen -- because it was 1/2 price of buying 6 individually). I ate almost all of them over the weekend. But, you know what? It helped me get back on the straight and narrow on Monday morning and every time I thought about "just one" of something I thought back to those donuts and was okay with passing on the future treats for a while. This worked well until COVID hit and I have been teleworking. No exercise except to walk to the kitchen or bathroom or when shopping for groceries. So, I am back and exercising for the first time in a VERY long time just to even things out. Good luck!3
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Hi OP,
Unfortunately, weight gain in this country comes with an enormous amount of guilt and victim blaming. It is difficult to 'diet' without feeling as if you have let yourself down by gaining weight. Removing the emotional component to dieting, takes away so much of the self recriminations, but it is very difficult.
In terms of calorie consumption, there are a large number of apps available that will determine the calories necessary for a 5 foot female engaging in different levels of activity. Some actually do suggest a daily intake under 1200, particularly with a sedentary lifestyle. [* reference.... I'm 5 foot and have tried every app available...].
Op I agree with the idea of getting a complete medical evaluation, including blood tests for lipid values. Although you are young, it is not too early to look at other reasons to maintain a better weight and fitness level. Seeing your LDL-cholesterol drop while your HDL increases is also helpful when you reach a weight plateau.
Remember, no matter what works for anyone else, only you know what motivates you and keeps you emotionally strong. Hang in there and understand there are many people with the same issues and challenges ...you are not alone!
Best of luck!!!
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Anonymouslyfree, it sounds like you have a good plan that is working for you. Be prepared that you will need to be flexible over time. Try new foods that you prepare rather than relying on packaged foods. By eating more foods in their natural state your palate will change over time and you will crave less junk. And most likely feel more satisfied.
I agree that the beginning losses are motivating. If you have never addressed your eating disorder, you should consider seeing a therapist. Or at least reading some books on EDs, doing the exercises in them and then see what direction you want to go in. There is an mental and emotional component to weight loss for many people. If you are not prepared for it, your successes can become setbacks.1 -
Congratulations on getting started, and on already losing weight. My advice is to treat yourself as kindly as you would a friend in your spot. Don't expect to be perfect and forgive yourself when you miss the mark. Keep your goals realistic and give your body the fuel it needs to be healty. Consider seeing a specialist as others have suggested, and maybe a health coach (coaching has helped me, so that's why I suggest it.) And, have a beautiful day!1
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I am 5'3 and I agree, 50 lbs looks like 100 on us. I lost 40 lbs three years ago and people acted like I had lost 100. It really shows on us. You are doing great losing 10 lbs, the rest of it will come off slow I am sure, 2 lbs a week but that is 16 in 2 months so go ahead, you can do it!1
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