I'm 18, moving out, and need advice before I tell my parents

cmonskinnylovee
cmonskinnylovee Posts: 339
edited October 2 in Chit-Chat
I need help! In June I plan on moving out of my parents house into an apartment with two other people. My rent would be roughly $350 a month, that includes gas, water, and heat. I want to move out because I really want to be on my own, and I know for a fact that I will get financial aid for school if I live on my own. I also pay my phone bill ($50), and my car insurance ($75). Do you think this is reasonable? I have a part time job, and money saved. Also, how do I tell my parents Im moving out? I don't want them to think it's because of them.
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Replies

  • hush7hush
    hush7hush Posts: 2,273 Member
    I moved out when I was 17.

    The only thing you should think about with the financial aid is that you are still considered dependant in most states until you're 24. Which means it doesn't matter if you live with them or not.
  • Also, do you think my parents will be upset? I can never tell with them. Would YOU be upset if your child moved out at 18? (I'll be almost 19 when I actually move out.)
  • juliecat1
    juliecat1 Posts: 3,450 Member
    Heres my advice....

    Stay at home with mom and dad while you go to college. I know they have rules and you want to be independent and that can be a drag. But living on your own gets expensive. Even if you have it all figured out on paper - theres always stuff that pops up that isnt accounted for. In my experience, it seems that most people who got apartments during college ended up dropping out and not going back until later. (ME!) Is living on campus on option? Dont be in such a rush to grow up. You have the rest of your life to pay bills and clean house.
  • twiztedgrl69
    twiztedgrl69 Posts: 191 Member
    Hush is right...you're still going to have to include your parents info for the financial aid
  • Heres my advice....

    Stay at home with mom and dad while you go to college. I know they have rules and you want to be independent and that can be a drag. But living on your own gets expensive. Even if you have it all figured out on paper - theres always stuff that pops up that isnt accounted for. In my experience, it seems that most people who got apartments during college ended up dropping out and not going back until later. (ME!) Is living on campus on option? Dont be in such a rush to grow up. You have the rest of your life to pay bills and clean house.

    I already pay for all my own bills, actually. The only thing I would be paying extra for if I moved out would be the rent and food. My parents don't pay for anything for me.

    I go to community college
  • Hush is right...you're still going to have to include your parents info for the financial aid

    I just found that out.

    That is BEYOND ridiculous. If it's MY income that is paying for my school, why are THEY taken into consideration?

    It's just another way for the government to screw me over.
  • Your parents have known for the last 18 years that would be moving out. They will be sad to see you go, will tell you can always go back home, and will be proud of you for trying this new adventure. As long as you tell them, stay good, and believe in yourself.....they will too.

    Good Luck!!!! It was the most amazing time in my life.
  • hush7hush
    hush7hush Posts: 2,273 Member
    I've lived on my own for three years.

    I still have to get loans because my mom makes too much.

    It sucks, but it's life.
  • squishysangel
    squishysangel Posts: 149 Member
    my suggestion would be to talk to a financial planner or credit counselor before you get to excited...they will help you think of any of the expenses you may not be allowing for like car repairs and such...and depending on your parents as long as you can show you've done your homework before you approach them they should be supportive. although as a mom myself with girls that will be moving out within the next couple of years its still not gonna be easy on them....again show that you have thought and considered everything and they should see you are mature enough to do this....and good luck the first time is exciting
  • Ravyn1982
    Ravyn1982 Posts: 225 Member
    The only thing you should think about with the financial aid is that you are still considered dependant in most states until you're 24. Which means it doesn't matter if you live with them or not.

    Actually that's a federal guideline with financial aid.

    I don't see it being a problem if you are done with high school (which it sounds like you will be). your parents probably won't like it but they can't stop you. My parents were actually happy to see me move out when I did. They told me it was about time, I was barely 20 at the time. THey'll get over it as long as your are responsible and don't get yourself in too much trouble.

    As far as money for school even if you move out on your own, unless you have children, you are going to have to use your parents for any kind of aid. I know I put off going to school because I didn't have a job and was under 25 and my parents made too much for me to get it otherwise at all.
  • tigersword
    tigersword Posts: 8,059 Member
    Car insurance sounds incredibly cheap for an 18 year old. Is that your own policy? Is the cell phone your own, or part of a family plan? Car insurance would probably go up if you move out of your parents' house, just something to think about.
  • i think it is ultimately your choice. you have to factor in other outputs for money as well such as food, something goes wrong with your car...what if a room mate falls through with rent or wants out of the lease? hope everything falls in to place
  • Just tell your parents, they will try to convince you not to, but in the end they will let you because it is a life learning experience. Being a parent myself, I know first hand about wanting to protect our children. Always wanting to know that they are safe and that they have everything they need. Tell your parents to let you experience living on your own, and if things are not as you expected, you'll move back in and appreciate what they have to offer you.
  • The only thing you should think about with the financial aid is that you are still considered dependant in most states until you're 24. Which means it doesn't matter if you live with them or not.

    Actually that's a federal guideline with financial aid.

    I don't see it being a problem if you are done with high school (which it sounds like you will be). your parents probably won't like it but they can't stop you. My parents were actually happy to see me move out when I did. They told me it was about time, I was barely 20 at the time. THey'll get over it as long as your are responsible and don't get yourself in too much trouble.

    As far as money for school even if you move out on your own, unless you have children, you are going to have to use your parents for any kind of aid. I know I put off going to school because I didn't have a job and was under 25 and my parents made too much for me to get it otherwise at all.

    I've been done with highschool for a few months, actually. I also paid off my first semester of school two days ago.

    You know what else is ridiculous for the whole financial aid thing? They aren't even using my biological father's income, who has partial custody of me, they're using my STEP DAD'S.

    As far as i know they are supposed to use you LEGAL guardian's income, correct?

    UGH.
  • i think it is ultimately your choice. you have to factor in other outputs for money as well such as food, something goes wrong with your car...what if a room mate falls through with rent or wants out of the lease? hope everything falls in to place

    I added food into the rent, actually. rent alone is 300, and i figured my room mates will help pay for food and i figure it will even out to be around 150 a month.

    My dad is a mechanic, and he fixes my car. I know my roommates, i've been friends with them for a while
  • Car insurance sounds incredibly cheap for an 18 year old. Is that your own policy? Is the cell phone your own, or part of a family plan? Car insurance would probably go up if you move out of your parents' house, just something to think about.

    The car insurance is under me and my dad's name, and it's just liability insurance. I don't think my dad will kick me off the plan as long as i pay for it haha.

    Cell phone is part of a family, but I'm changing to cricket wireless as soon as my contract expires, and that's $35 a month
  • juliecat1
    juliecat1 Posts: 3,450 Member
    yeah... never assume your roommates will be responsible. Too many bad experiences with bad checks and people eating my food I guess.
  • sarah44254
    sarah44254 Posts: 3,078 Member
    About the Financial Aid, still try and apply. Especially if your parents are good people and will fill out the paperwork. My parents were broke, completely. If they would have filled out the papers I could have still gotten 100% aid. But they claimed that the government was evil and going to bill them (which they don't send any bills to the parents, at all) so they didn't sign anything. This prevented me from applying for aid, which prevented me from attending college until I turned 24. Really sucked!

    So try and apply with your parents info on there. You might still qualify for a bit of assistance!

    As for the moving out? There are SOOOOOO many expenses that you cannot foresee. As well as time to study after classes (even community college) I am taking 12 credits at a community college and cannot find time to study working full time and living on my own. This semester I am only working at MOST 32 hrs a week and it has given me JUST enough time to study/prep for classes, since I also need to take care of house cleanup, bill payment and groceries, dinner planning/purchasing... it does suck that I get a bit of a pay decrease since I work 8 less hrs each week, and I had to take that and weigh it against failing classes. I chose less pay so I can keep a great GPA.

    If you can skip on rent/groceries by living with your parents, I highly suggest it. Then you can work as little or as much as you want to afford your bills as well as study in a safe environment.

    Also, sometimes people change when you move in with them. I moved in with a bestest best friend who was very quiet and had a good honest reputation. She was really quite the partier, I found her dabbling in drugs and other sorts of sad things. She always paid her rent on time but was always asking for rides here and there or just disappearing for days on end. That was not what I expected when I signed the lease with her.

    Ultimately it is totally up to you. I would definitely talk to your parents about it if you are leaving, though! Don't burn any bridges, you know? :)
  • foremant86
    foremant86 Posts: 1,115 Member
    moving out is hard but obviously you need to at some point lol

    Living with other people is also hard, it may all sound great on paper but once you're living with other people problems come up. I'd really make sure you think it through before moving out. I move out when i was 18 as well and let me tell ya it didn't go well, ended up very poor and having to go to a food bank so we could eat...

    Also you may have a part time job but there is no guarantee you'll have it down the road, things change and in this economy people end up unemployed before they even know whats hit them.

    and yea financial aid doesn't care if you're living on your own or not, they still go by your parents income, which is exactly why i am not in college. parents make too much but don't want to pay for me to go to college and I can't afford it so i'm waiting til i'm 25 and considered independent from them.
  • my suggestion would be to talk to a financial planner or credit counselor before you get to excited...they will help you think of any of the expenses you may not be allowing for like car repairs and such...and depending on your parents as long as you can show you've done your homework before you approach them they should be supportive. although as a mom myself with girls that will be moving out within the next couple of years its still not gonna be easy on them....again show that you have thought and considered everything and they should see you are mature enough to do this....and good luck the first time is exciting

    My dad fixes my car since I pay for my own school, and he's a decent guy so I don't think he'll stop because I move out haha.
  • yeah... never assume your roommates will be responsible. Too many bad experiences with bad checks and people eating my food I guess.

    my roommates have had to support themselves their entire lives, I think I can trust them actually.

    They're family life really is horrible, that's why I'm helping them out by moving in with them :/
  • I moved out at 17. Maybe it's a bigger deal in the States than in the UK but most people I know move out of the family home at 17/18. Are you really considered a dependent until 24 in some states? That's unbelievable. the US is such a funny little place.
  • I moved out at 17. Maybe it's a bigger deal in the States than in the UK but most people I know move out of the family home at 17/18. Are you really considered a dependent until 24 in some states? That's unbelievable. the US is such a funny little place.

    Right? It's ridiculous that I'll be considered dependent if I'm living on my own, paying for my own school and bills, and feeding myself.

    I hate the government so much sometimes.
  • ninerbuff
    ninerbuff Posts: 48,984 Member
    It's good you want to move out, but I will give you good advice on "room mates". There will be times where you will disagree and in some cases this can cause friction enough for one or more to move out. If all 3 of you are on the lease, then all 3 are responsible, but if for some reason you can't make the rent, your credit will suffer. And believe me today, you DON'T want to have any credit issues. It will make things so much harder in the long run. I would urge you to really look at your income. If you don't have 3x the amount of income as your rent, you may run into trouble when "things" just come up out of nowhere.
  • Also, I am going to save EVERY PENNY I can until I move out. I am a BIG saver haha
  • Iamfit4life
    Iamfit4life Posts: 3,095 Member
    Heres my advice....

    Stay at home with mom and dad while you go to college. I know they have rules and you want to be independent and that can be a drag. But living on your own gets expensive. Even if you have it all figured out on paper - theres always stuff that pops up that isnt accounted for. In my experience, it seems that most people who got apartments during college ended up dropping out and not going back until later. (ME!) Is living on campus on option? Dont be in such a rush to grow up. You have the rest of your life to pay bills and clean house.


    THIS!! I think it's much more accepted nowdays. I think a lot of people are now actually living with them until they get in serious relationships or even married.
    I've seen entire communities work that way.
  • It's good you want to move out, but I will give you good advice on "room mates". There will be times where you will disagree and in some cases this can cause friction enough for one or more to move out. If all 3 of you are on the lease, then all 3 are responsible, but if for some reason you can't make the rent, your credit will suffer. And believe me today, you DON'T want to have any credit issues. It will make things so much harder in the long run. I would urge you to really look at your income. If you don't have 3x the amount of income as your rent, you may run into trouble when "things" just come up out of nowhere.

    I'm going to get a second job, and I plan on selling a lot of my old things in order to save up more money.

    I finished paying my first semester of school two or three days ago actually, and I've only been in school for three weeks, haha. I am very responsible, and I believe my room mates are as well. They've supported themselves for most of their life, because their family is, well, less than desirable.
  • It's good you want to move out, but I will give you good advice on "room mates". There will be times where you will disagree and in some cases this can cause friction enough for one or more to move out. If all 3 of you are on the lease, then all 3 are responsible, but if for some reason you can't make the rent, your credit will suffer. And believe me today, you DON'T want to have any credit issues. It will make things so much harder in the long run. I would urge you to really look at your income. If you don't have 3x the amount of income as your rent, you may run into trouble when "things" just come up out of nowhere.

    I'm going to get a second job, and I plan on selling a lot of my old things in order to save up more money.

    I finished paying my first semester of school two or three days ago actually, and I've only been in school for three weeks, haha. I am very responsible, and I believe my room mates are as well. They've supported themselves for most of their life, because their family is, well, less than desirable.
  • ninerbuff
    ninerbuff Posts: 48,984 Member



    THIS!! I think it's much more accepted nowdays. I think a lot of people are now actually living with them until they get in serious relationships or even married.
    I've seen entire communities work that way.
    Yeah I stayed at home till I was 23. Not uncommon for an Asian family.
  • TheMaidOfAstolat
    TheMaidOfAstolat Posts: 3,222 Member
    It will get crazy expensive! Trust me! Stay till you are 20 or can truly afford it. Save all the money you can right now. Pile it away...with this economy stay where you are even if it's not the best situation. I'm 26, divorced, and have a 7 year old...I'm living with the ex in-laws and I can tell you...I wish I had saved more money. My house is about to be in forclosure and while I am lucky enough to not have any debt other than the house my credit is still ruined. You are young and faily naive (which is where I was 7 years ago)...give it time. Why are you wanting to be out of your parents house? I was pregnant and getting married...which was not the plan I had intended. I wanted to be in college and eventually get my masters before even meeting a decent man...and then adopt. Be carefull...the real world has some major complications which you may not be ready for.
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