Broken body?

The following has happened to me frequently over the last couple of years - yes I recognise I am in an unhealthy cycle...

When I eat 'normal' which by that I mean not trying to lose, my day typically looks like this:
Breakfast: coffee
Dinner: nothing OR pasty/1.5 sandwich with cake/pastry & crisps
Tea: massive meal of pasta or rice with meat and veg (usually around 8pm)
Evening: alcohol and high calorie snacks
When I have logged the calorie intake on these days, we are roughly looking at 3500-4000.

Then I have a period of wanting to diet. I will have small healthy meals, few snacks, no alcohol and track on here with the calories on 1200 as recommended. I frequently do this for four days then break and have the weekend eating like a pig again. Occasionally I have managed to keep to it for a week or two weeks and see a loss of 2-3lb though sometimes only 1lb. This demotivates me so I switch back to 'normal' again for a couple of weeks.

I tried slimming world and WW a couple of times each but ended up gaining weight on both. The most I lost was 5lb one week on WW but then 'celebrated' for the weekend and gained 6lb the next. On both SW & WW I would generally keep to the diet most days but allow myself weigh day off or even the weekend off where I would eat/drink to excess again. I know this means I didnt actually follow these diets and any loss was actually just a fluke.

Before christmas I was very strict and kept to no alcohol/1200 calories for 14 days. The first week I lost 6lb, the second 3lb. Then I allowed myself a week off for christmas, which turned into two I regained the 9lb I lost and an additional 3lb. I tried again, admittedly only 80% as strict for the next two weeks and lost nothing. Obviously in my head I then lost it completely and ate/drank everything again.

I know I fail at dieting and eating healthy. I know I never do it right. I dont need telling any of that. What I dont understand is how I regularly over the last few years can drop from 4000 calories a day to 1200 and not lose anything Is my body broken? If I try again will I even succeed?
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Replies

  • goal06082021
    goal06082021 Posts: 2,130 Member
    Why are you aiming for 1200? How tall are you, what is your starting weight and goal weight? 1200 might be too low for you, especially if you're taller than about 5'2" (160cm). 1200 is the minimum MFP will allow for women - are you trying to lose 2lb per week? That might be too aggressive a rate of loss for you, try 1lb or 1/2lb per week.
  • MaltedTea
    MaltedTea Posts: 6,286 Member
    Hi there! Your body isn't broken.

    It's a lot to ask any system to run at 100% (3500 calories of low quality fuel) then immediately switch to running at 30% even with a premium fuel (1200 calories with better food choices)

    Pardon the analogy but consider titrating down your calories every other week. Or even every three weeks. There's no rush to weight loss or gaining healthy habits.

    Furthermore, not everyone needs to go to rock bottom 1200 calories. And even if you do, it
    - more often than not - shouldn't be for an extended period of time. Recalculate your TDEE regularly (I do so the first of each month, for example)

    I suggest you meander in the forums to read some threads with other MFPers who may have started with a similar mindset to yours but have accomplished a lot as they work on their health goals.🤗
  • When I set up MFP and said to lose 2lb it recommended 1200 so I just trusted it. However, I did look at another app which said 1324 was my target allowance so I really dont know.
    5 foot 8", currently 17 stone 1lb (239lb). I would like to be somewhere between 10.5 to 11 stone.
    Pretty much sedentary most of the time but started to go for daily walks at the beginning of the year mostly for mental health reasons to be honest rather than exercise as I get out of breath very fast.
    I have a lower back and pelvis issue which limits movement. I have severe depression and anxiety too.
  • elmusho1989
    elmusho1989 Posts: 321 Member
    This was/is me. I'm a bartender too so late nights, fast food, drinking is a big part of it. I'm 5 foot 3 and I was probably on those calories for a few years. I hate thinking about it but I get you!

    Thing is, it's hard. Sugar crashes were my nemesis so eating 3 meals a day helped I think. Energy crashes made me binge sugar and that was a vicious cycle.

    I'd recommend trying to commit to mfp for a month and see how you get on. I'm about 3 months in now and I've lost 13 pounds. It works!

    Slow and steady, eat regular meals, try to stick within your recommended calories and BE NICE TO YOURSELF! If you eat too much one day, try again. You can't fail if it's a lifestyle change😊
  • snowflake954
    snowflake954 Posts: 8,399 Member
    At your height and weight 1200 cal a day is too little, that's why it doesn't last long. Just my take--you keep swinging between 2 extremes and you're not getting anywhere. Why not take the middle road? How many cals does MFP give you for a 1 lb a week loss? That way you won't starve yourself and should be able to control binges.

    Get a digital food scale and start weighing and measuring all your food and drink. Stay within your goal every day. It will be easier. I don't know how old you are, but movement is very good. Just walking is great, if you like that. Make it a habit and it will help with a myriad of problems. Once you find the groove things get easier. Keep trying and you'll need patience and persistence. 2 weeks is nothing. Just keep going no matter what. Luck.
  • MaltedTea wrote: »
    Hi there! Your body isn't broken.

    It's a lot to ask any system to run at 100% (3500 calories of low quality fuel) then immediately switch to running at 30% even with a premium fuel (1200 calories with better food choices)

    This makes a lot of sense.
    What do you mean by "titrating down your calories every other week"?
    And what is TDEE?
  • Just set it to 1lb loss per week and it says 1750 calories. This seems very high :s
  • When I set up MFP and said to lose 2lb it recommended 1200 so I just trusted it. However, I did look at another app which said 1324 was my target allowance so I really dont know.
    5 foot 8", currently 17 stone 1lb (239lb). I would like to be somewhere between 10.5 to 11 stone.
    Pretty much sedentary most of the time but started to go for daily walks at the beginning of the year mostly for mental health reasons to be honest rather than exercise as I get out of breath very fast.
    I have a lower back and pelvis issue which limits movement. I have severe depression and anxiety too.

    OK, so 1200 and 2lb per week is way, way, way too aggressive for your height and the amount you have to lose. Set your loss rate at 1/2 lb per week, activity level Lightly Active. Walking is perfectly good exercise - you can build up to longer walks as your health allows. Commit to that for 6-8 weeks and see where you are.

    I'm 5'3" (shorter than you), 244 (heavier than you), and I'm losing about a pound per week on double that calorie budget - I average about 2650 cal/day. I do exercise daily for about half an hour in the mornings, but I'm sure that doesn't get me more than about 250-300 additional calories burned over TDEE, and I have a desk job, so I'm basically on my *kitten* the rest of the time.

    Ok. I will do this.
    February is a perfect four week month so I will commit to the four weeks and see what happens.
    Thank you x
  • When I set up MFP and said to lose 2lb it recommended 1200 so I just trusted it. However, I did look at another app which said 1324 was my target allowance so I really dont know.
    5 foot 8", currently 17 stone 1lb (239lb). I would like to be somewhere between 10.5 to 11 stone.
    Pretty much sedentary most of the time but started to go for daily walks at the beginning of the year mostly for mental health reasons to be honest rather than exercise as I get out of breath very fast.
    I have a lower back and pelvis issue which limits movement. I have severe depression and anxiety too.

    OK, so 1200 and 2lb per week is way, way, way too aggressive for your height and the amount you have to lose. Set your loss rate at 1/2 lb per week, activity level Lightly Active. Walking is perfectly good exercise - you can build up to longer walks as your health allows. Commit to that for 6-8 weeks and see where you are.

    I'm 5'3" (shorter than you), 244 (heavier than you), and I'm losing about a pound per week on double that calorie budget - I average about 2650 cal/day. I do exercise daily for about half an hour in the mornings, but I'm sure that doesn't get me more than about 250-300 additional calories burned over TDEE, and I have a desk job, so I'm basically on my *kitten* the rest of the time.

    Ok. I will do this.
    February is a perfect four week month so I will commit to the four weeks and see what happens.
    Thank you x

    I mean commit to it for the four weeks initially so I dont feel overwhelmed. I intend to do it for longer. I have to.
  • snowflake954
    snowflake954 Posts: 8,399 Member
    Just set it to 1lb loss per week and it says 1750 calories. This seems very high :s

    You need to try it for several weeks and see how it goes. You can always add or subtract calories then. However, for someone that eats 3500-4000 calories when "letting go", 1750 seems a lot less. As we're all saying--middle of the road, not extremes. You need to change your mindset.
  • Just set it to 1lb loss per week and it says 1750 calories. This seems very high :s

    You need to try it for several weeks and see how it goes. You can always add or subtract calories then. However, for someone that eats 3500-4000 calories when "letting go", 1750 seems a lot less. As we're all saying--middle of the road, not extremes. You need to change your mindset.

    Yes I understand.
    I honestly never thought of it as going from one extreme to the other, I just thought going from a lot of calories to a little would equal a big weekly loss for the first few months.
    Thank you.
  • Just set it to 1lb loss per week and it says 1750 calories. This seems very high :s

    You need to try it for several weeks and see how it goes. You can always add or subtract calories then. However, for someone that eats 3500-4000 calories when "letting go", 1750 seems a lot less. As we're all saying--middle of the road, not extremes. You need to change your mindset.

    Yes I understand.
    I honestly never thought of it as going from one extreme to the other, I just thought going from a lot of calories to a little would equal a big weekly loss for the first few months.
    Thank you.

    I mean, you're right, it would. The problem is that that's not safe or sustainable - you've seen yourself it's not sustainable for more than a couple of weeks for you, and I think that's true of most people, anyone would be hard-pressed to sustain that for very long. Extreme calorie restriction puts a lot of stress on the body, which makes life in general much harder than it needs to be. Weight loss is a marathon, not a sprint. Speed isn't the name of the game here, it's sustainability.

    When you reach GW, you will still need to eat and food will still have calories. So, in the process of becoming a person who weighs 10st, you need to learn how to eat like a person who weighs 10st. But jumping straight there will just result in you starving and suffering the whole time, and then when you get to 10st you'll feel like you're "done" doing whatever it is and go back to your normal life...which is how you got to 17st. So, start eating like someone who weighs 16st until you weigh 16st. Then start eating like someone who weighs 15st until you get there. It's a gradual process, I'm sure you've seen people use the term "lifestyle change" and that's what it really has to be.

    That's really well explained, thank you. I can see I was thinking of things all the wrong way around and when people spoke about a lifestyle change that it had to be 100% full on straight away and no slip ups. It sounds a lot simpler and easier to follow when you put it the way you have there and I will be able to follow that much better without feeling like a failure.
    Thank you for taking the time to explain things to me.
  • callsitlikeiseeit
    callsitlikeiseeit Posts: 8,626 Member
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  • heybales
    heybales Posts: 18,842 Member
    When I set up MFP and said to lose 2lb it recommended 1200 so I just trusted it. However, I did look at another app which said 1324 was my target allowance so I really dont know.
    5 foot 8", currently 17 stone 1lb (239lb). I would like to be somewhere between 10.5 to 11 stone.
    Pretty much sedentary most of the time but started to go for daily walks at the beginning of the year mostly for mental health reasons to be honest rather than exercise as I get out of breath very fast.
    I have a lower back and pelvis issue which limits movement. I have severe depression and anxiety too.

    It is beneficial to have alcohol in the house, or go to places with it?
    From your story it sounded like that probably made it easier to overdue the snacks which must have been the majority of those calories.
  • Speakeasy76
    Speakeasy76 Posts: 961 Member
    You've been given a lot of great advice already, but I'll just add my 2 cents: I don't think your body is broken, but perhaps you are going about losing weight in an "all-or nothing" approach. So, it may not be your body that's "broken," but maybe your mindset about weight loss.

    I used to have that kind of mindset about weight loss, that it was about going on a "diet" or "counting points" etc., without truly viewing it as a lifestyle change. Yes, I'd heard about weight loss being a "lifestyle change" and "not a diet," but I don't know if I fully accepted that mentality in the past. When that was the case, I'd do like you did--lose some (or a lot), then gain it back.

    What changed for me, I think, was viewing this as a lifestyle change for my overall health and wellbeing, not just as a way to lose weight. Having that bigger (and to me, more important) goal kind of actually took the pressure off of doing it to look a certain way by a certain time. I also set a more modest weight-loss goal, which I'd advise for you, too. Perhaps look at a goal initially of 1-pound loss per week, then decrease to .5-lb per week once you get closer to your goal. Yes, it will take longer, but if you truly want to keep it off, it shouldn't matter in the long run.

    Since you're attempting a lifestyle change and not just a quick fix, you'll want to think about tackling it in small steps. Right a few down that you think you'd be able to accomplish, then as you meet those goals, add a few more. It won't feel so overwhelming that way, and more sustainable. Maybe it's just committing to tracking what you eat, then after you've done that for a few weeks, see where you can make some changes. Maybe it's cutting down on the alcohol and/or drinking more water. ...whatever resonates with you. I know some people have given advice of what has worked for them, but also keep in mind that weight loss is individual. What works for some may not work for you!

    Good luck, you can do this!
  • kshama2001
    kshama2001 Posts: 28,052 Member
    When I set up MFP and said to lose 2lb it recommended 1200 so I just trusted it. However, I did look at another app which said 1324 was my target allowance so I really dont know.
    5 foot 8", currently 17 stone 1lb (239lb). I would like to be somewhere between 10.5 to 11 stone.
    Pretty much sedentary most of the time but started to go for daily walks at the beginning of the year mostly for mental health reasons to be honest rather than exercise as I get out of breath very fast.
    I have a lower back and pelvis issue which limits movement. I have severe depression and anxiety too.
    MFP said 1200 because you chose the rate of loss of 2 # per week. This is common. That's what I chose too, for about half a day :lol:

    Like others have said, do choose a less aggressive rate of loss.

    Just set it to 1lb loss per week and it says 1750 calories. This seems very high :s

    You need to try it for several weeks and see how it goes. You can always add or subtract calories then. However, for someone that eats 3500-4000 calories when "letting go", 1750 seems a lot less. As we're all saying--middle of the road, not extremes. You need to change your mindset.

    Yes I understand.
    I honestly never thought of it as going from one extreme to the other, I just thought going from a lot of calories to a little would equal a big weekly loss for the first few months.
    Thank you.
    The body can react to stress by holding on to water. Going from 3500-4000 calories to 1200 calories is stressful. You may have lost fat, but retained water, which would mask your actual fat loss.
  • MaltedTea
    MaltedTea Posts: 6,286 Member
    MaltedTea wrote: »
    Hi there! Your body isn't broken.

    It's a lot to ask any system to run at 100% (3500 calories of low quality fuel) then immediately switch to running at 30% even with a premium fuel (1200 calories with better food choices)

    This makes a lot of sense.
    What do you mean by "titrating down your calories every other week"?
    And what is TDEE?

    The titration aspect seems to have been covered already: essentially, work your way down slowly to 1750. February would be a fun month to do so. Like, if we're me...

    Week 1: 3,000 cal/per day (but try one 2,500 cal day)
    Week 2: 2,500 cal/ per day (but try one 2,000 cal day)
    Week 3: 2,000 cal/per day (but try one 1,750 cal day)
    Week 4: 1,750 cal/per day (but consider one 2,000 - 2,500 cal day) and see if you can sustain this for next month. Then in April, recalculate your TDEE and try fewer 2,000-2,500 cal days

    TDEE and BMR calculations are basically handled by MFP. That's how you got your new number for 1,750 calories/day.

    I like using...

    http://tdeecalculator.net

    And ALL of the above is to be taken with a grain of salt because checking in with your healthcare team is always the better approach.
  • psychod787
    psychod787 Posts: 4,099 Member
    No judgement..... but, sounds like you do the classic restrict and binge cycles. Until you find an eating pattern you like and can maintain in the long run, weight loss and maintenance is going to be hard.
  • sijomial
    sijomial Posts: 19,809 Member
    edited February 2021
    When I set up MFP and said to lose 2lb it recommended 1200 so I just trusted it. However, I did look at another app which said 1324 was my target allowance so I really dont know.
    5 foot 8", currently 17 stone 1lb (239lb). I would like to be somewhere between 10.5 to 11 stone.
    Pretty much sedentary most of the time but started to go for daily walks at the beginning of the year mostly for mental health reasons to be honest rather than exercise as I get out of breath very fast.
    I have a lower back and pelvis issue which limits movement. I have severe depression and anxiety too.

    Just a suggestion to think about.
    If/when you have bad days or bad weeks when it all feels too hard have a plan ready for those times - a plan that has you maintaining weight to consolidate progress rather than throwing in the towel and regaining everything you have lost.
    If you don't slip back you will get to your end goal, maybe later rather than sooner but that's far preferable to yo-yo'ing between boom and bust. You need to break that destructive cycle.

    Best wishes.
  • lynn_glenmont
    lynn_glenmont Posts: 10,106 Member
    When I set up MFP and said to lose 2lb it recommended 1200 so I just trusted it. However, I did look at another app which said 1324 was my target allowance so I really dont know.
    5 foot 8", currently 17 stone 1lb (239lb). I would like to be somewhere between 10.5 to 11 stone.
    Pretty much sedentary most of the time but started to go for daily walks at the beginning of the year mostly for mental health reasons to be honest rather than exercise as I get out of breath very fast.
    I have a lower back and pelvis issue which limits movement. I have severe depression and anxiety too.

    OK, so 1200 and 2lb per week is way, way, way too aggressive for your height and the amount you have to lose. Set your loss rate at 1/2 lb per week, activity level Lightly Active. Walking is perfectly good exercise - you can build up to longer walks as your health allows. Commit to that for 6-8 weeks and see where you are.

    I'm 5'3" (shorter than you), 244 (heavier than you), and I'm losing about a pound per week on double that calorie budget - I average about 2650 cal/day. I do exercise daily for about half an hour in the mornings, but I'm sure that doesn't get me more than about 250-300 additional calories burned over TDEE, and I have a desk job, so I'm basically on my *kitten* the rest of the time.

    Someone like OP with a BMI in the severely obese range can afford to lose more than a half pound per week.
  • goal06082021
    goal06082021 Posts: 2,130 Member
    When I set up MFP and said to lose 2lb it recommended 1200 so I just trusted it. However, I did look at another app which said 1324 was my target allowance so I really dont know.
    5 foot 8", currently 17 stone 1lb (239lb). I would like to be somewhere between 10.5 to 11 stone.
    Pretty much sedentary most of the time but started to go for daily walks at the beginning of the year mostly for mental health reasons to be honest rather than exercise as I get out of breath very fast.
    I have a lower back and pelvis issue which limits movement. I have severe depression and anxiety too.

    OK, so 1200 and 2lb per week is way, way, way too aggressive for your height and the amount you have to lose. Set your loss rate at 1/2 lb per week, activity level Lightly Active. Walking is perfectly good exercise - you can build up to longer walks as your health allows. Commit to that for 6-8 weeks and see where you are.

    I'm 5'3" (shorter than you), 244 (heavier than you), and I'm losing about a pound per week on double that calorie budget - I average about 2650 cal/day. I do exercise daily for about half an hour in the mornings, but I'm sure that doesn't get me more than about 250-300 additional calories burned over TDEE, and I have a desk job, so I'm basically on my *kitten* the rest of the time.

    Someone like OP with a BMI in the severely obese range can afford to lose more than a half pound per week.

    Sure, but clearly they tend to go too hard and burn out, so I'm suggesting they start smaller and ease into it. Just because they can doesn't mean they have to.
  • MaltedTea
    MaltedTea Posts: 6,286 Member
    *snip*
    Someone like OP with a BMI in the severely obese range can afford to lose more than a half pound per week.

    Mathematically, sure. Clinically, perhaps. Mentally, probable.

    However since CICO isn't just about the math and a person's medical history needs to be considered as well as their mindset to start (and then sustain) a long-term health improvement process, it's not for any of us to say.