I'm not getting anywhere, think I have a problem with binging

You have astutely noted that there are two aspects -- physical and mental. The physical aspect is the easier to master. How do you know how many calories? MFP set-up is a good place to start. Depending on your non-exercise activity and other personal details, you could probably lose 0.5lb/week at 1750 calories/day. The whole process is so, so much easier if you take the time to dial in an appropriate rate of loss and calorie goal at the start. The fastest way to fail is setting a goal that is too aggressive and undereating. It's not just you. We are all liable to binge if we under-eat for any period of time.

What do you think about setting your goal to "maintain" while you work through the mental aspects? This will take the physical element off the table while you observe what is really going on mentally. If you can nourish yourself somewhat consistently without binges at this intake level for a week or two, then you will have confidence going forward that you can do so in an appropriate deficit. If you struggle to manage eating behaviors at maintenance, then you will have more information to equip you in addressing that challenge.

ETA: You indicate you have been struggling with a "fast loss" goal for a year. If instead you had adopted a 0.5lb/week plan, you would have lost 26 lb by now. Sometimes slow and steady wins the race. Best to you, OP!

I support what those above have said. I'd like to add the flip side of cupcakesandproteinshakes' post. Mine may or may not apply.

If by "binge" you mean it in the sense of eating completely uncontrollably, consuming any foods that come to hand whether you like or want them or feel hungry or overfull, totally unable to stop, with waves of guilt or shame in the picture, then she's 100% correct. She's correct even if it's remotely close to that.

If, instead, you mean being in the habit of eating too many tempting, tasty things off and on over the weekend, so that you end up way over goal, and having trouble changing those habits . . . that's different.

If that latter, there are a few things I might suggest:

* Go for an overall slow loss, as recommended above, half a pound a week . . . on average.

* Consider "calorie banking". During the week, eat a bit under your calorie goal (not lots, maybe 100-200 calories, tops). On the weekend, spend those calories on weekend treats. Look at your weekly average calorie intake, and *average* your goal calories over the total week.

* Consider whether there is some unacknowledged issue that's blocking you from truly wanting to reach the weight goal. This is not an issue for everyone, but it's a possibility. As just one example, some people have been thinking that reaching goal weight will be life changing in itself, but as the weight gets close, the realization begins to dawn that being at goal weight doesn't fix everything, so sabotaging goal weight becomes a way to avoid facing that. That's just one possibility, of many.

* Make a serious examination of your weekend habits.

To do that last, consider things like this:

* Are you bored? Take up a new hobby, or resume an old one. (Bonus points if it requires clean hands, like sketching, playing a musical instrument, needlework . . .; or creates dirty ones, like painting, carpentry, gardening . . . .).

* Schedule the exercise you say you want to do into your weekend routine. Make it non-negotiable, in your own brain, just something you *will* do, regular as tooth-brushing. Work on a couch to 5k (C25K) program for your running, find some aerobics videos you like. That will take up some of the weekend time, help you improve health/fitness, *and* give you a few extra calories to eat on the weekend, on top of whatever you "banked" during the week. Some people find that a fitness program helps them focus on good nutrition and sensible calories, because they have goals and want to feel better and achieve more on that front.

* Are there triggers for your weekend consumption, like activities during which you usually snack (like binge-watching TV), social situations (getting together with a partner or friends and bonding over food/drinks), feeling like you deserve a reward after a tough week, etc.? Think of different ways you could behave in those situations, things that would be realistic for you, that you could do instead of eat. Maybe you could work on a jigsaw puzzle while watching Netflix, instead of snacking. Maybe you could enjoy a hot herb tea or a zero/low calorie infused water instead of high-calorie snacks. Maybe you could suggest to your friends that you go for a walk at the park instead of just snacking. If it's feeling that you deserve a reward, think about other possible rewards, like maybe a warm indulgent aromatherapy bubblebath, or a manicure. Come up with one new idea for each weekend, vividly rehearse it in your head in advance, then put it into play that next weekend. If it worked, keep it. If it didn't, try something else. Keep chipping away at it.

* Plan ahead. If there are times when you're going to want to snack, have some things on hand, ready to eat, that are less calorie-dense, perhaps more filling/nutritious, but still things you enjoy eating. (Common suggestions are popcorn, baby carrots, other crunchy veggies, hard boiled eggs, etc.) Avoid stocking things you want to eat less of, and keep any you do buy tucked away in a dark, high cupboard, with preferred choices easier to hand. Prep or pre-portion snacks, give yourself a budget ("I can eat one individual bag of tortilla chips each day", etc.). Maybe prelog. Don't eat out of multi-serving bags or dishes. If you're going to have chips, put one portion in a bowl in the kitchen, take them back to the TV, don't take the whole bag. Make yourself decide whether you need more, and then truly *think* about it each time. It's not "bad" to have more, but it's always a *choice*, a choice about balancing immediate pleasure against longer-term goals.

* Undesired habits are usually easier to drop if we adopt new, more preferable habits instead. Don't simply try to do the Netflix binge-watch and white-knuckle through it. Either don't do the binge watch (maybe alternate episodes with exercise breaks? do something else, like take a walk, instead of screen time?), or do some other thing alongside instead of snacking, like the jigsaw or some knitting. Replacement habits.

In general, un-"can't" yourself. Create a little cognitive space for the possibility of change. It's not that you *can't* stop over-eating on weekends, can't get back into a workout routine, etc. (You've done some of it before; other people do those things, so you can too.) It's just that so far, you haven't figured out exactly *how* to do it. Keep working on it, keep chipping away: You'll figure out the whys, and the hows, if you mentally commit to "I haven't found the right approach yet" rather than "I can't".

Ahoy_m8 is right: Slow loss works. I've been losing a few vanity pounds ridiculously slowly, by intention (calorie banking along the way, also BTW). It's been almost completely painless. My effective deficit has been somewhere around 100-150 calories daily. Over about 16 months, I'm down around 15 pounds. It's almost absurdly slow, but it's one perfectly reasonable strategy for someone who has relatively little weight to lose. A 100 calorie daily deficit, steadily, is around 10 pounds of weight loss in a year. Better than zero loss, let alone gain . . . and pretty darned easy to live with.

Best wishes!

I think everyone replied really astutely and I don't have much to add.

I will say that I have been trying unsuccessfully to loose weight for about 4 years. I am now finally loosing weight.

What's different is that I have had to address my stress and stress response levels. I have had to learn how to take care of myself and be true to myself in a very deep and real way. It's been a long road of broken commitments to myself and intense frustration/shame. Even so, I persevered and have learned to be content with tiny victories.