Struggling with fast food and overeating my whole life

sirlanceoflompoc
sirlanceoflompoc Posts: 18 Member
in Motivation and Support
Hey guys, I feel desperate to break a cycle.
I am 30M and I find that no matter what I try, I always end up in a vicious cycle of unhealthy eating habits.
Growing up, my whole family was obese and uneducated about their own health. We did not have an effective culture around good health. One of my distant cousins died in his 30s from being fat.

I really want to break this cycle. I have had periods of my life where I can exercise and diet well for about 6 months, then I fall back into my old ways and gain back everything I lose. A classic yo yo effect.

I live in a nice area where most people live a very healthy life, and I feel insecure about my health compared to them. Its this feeling of immaturity like I haven't grown the *kitten* up about my health yet.

Some nights during the week I find myself in fast food drive thrus ordering 3000 calories of future heart disease then eating in my car to hide it from people. Feeling ashamed of myself when throwing away the trash after, feeling like I even need to be sneaky about that.

I know what I need to do to get good health. I am educated on how to exercise and eat right. I just don't do it.

Part of it I think is my lack of social life. I eat emotionally. I work infront of the computer all day writing software. Then I get away from the computer while being pretty in my head after thinking about complex issues all day. Then I have nobody to really enjoy company with in a way that fills me up emotionally, and despite the millions of things I know I can do about the situation, rather than putting in the work, I eat.

All of this makes me think my unhealthy eating is in part a combination of habit and also a symptom of deeper psychological problems.

Maybe I need a good therapist, don't know where to find some good ones for this issue.
Anybody out there who relates? Who has overcome this themselves? What did you do?

Replies

  • DancingMoosie
    DancingMoosie Posts: 8,619 Member
    It most definitely could be a combination of habit and something else. Lack of social life is also a contributing factor. Do you have any friends or family that you can get together with on evenings or weekends? Take a class and meet people? Try to incorporate some healthier eating options, like salad/vegetables/fruit and just reduce the portions of fast food. Try taking a walk outside or do an easy YouTube workout to start moving. Replace your late night eating with some other activity you enjoy. Baby steps.
  • rosebarnalice
    rosebarnalice Posts: 3,488 Member
    sirlanceoflompoc wrote: »
    Hey guys, I feel desperate to break a cycle.
    Maybe I need a good therapist, don't know where to find some good ones for this issue.
    Anybody out there who relates? Who has overcome this themselves? What did you do?

    Although I grew up in a "healthy household" I was a SERIOUS emotional eater who yo-yo dieted so many times before the age of 18 that I've lost count, and continued to struggle well into my 50s.

    It's interesting that you mention therapy, because it was going to a therapist about work-related stress that finally led to a breakthrough in understanding my emotional eating behaviors. Thanks to a good therapist, I learned to identify my stress triggers, and also learned much healthier (both mentally and physically)
    ways to address my feelings in ways other than trying to "stuff down" bad feelings or "puff up" good feelings with food.

    Key to my success was identifying the THOUGHTS that led to the FEELINGS that led to the ACTIONS of overeating. In addition, to the thoughts-feelings-actions cycle, "feeling my feelings" without reaching for a snack was one of the hardest lessons I ever had to learn to put into practice. For me, one of the values of logging accurately in MFP is that it gives me a "stop and think" moment: for a long time, when I found myself turning into a drive-thru (or staring into the fridge), I would check my log, and then say to myself "okay, you've had xxx calories today, so you KNOW what you're feeling is NOT hunger. So what is it? Let's just pull out of the parking lot (or walk into the other room) and just FEEL this feeling. You can do this! You can FEEL this without eating that feeling!

    I wish you the best
  • 88olds
    88olds Posts: 4,545 Member
    Start by finding a therapist. Try one, if you don’t like the first one move to another.

    You tried a food diary and calorie counting? I’ve lost 100 lbs and kept it off for years eating a lot of my meals in restaurants including fast food. It can be done.

    I basically lost in 2 stages 285 lbs to about 220. Then about 216 to 184. Something I had to deal with was the fact that what I had learned losing the first 65 lbs was no help getting lower. In fact what I thought I knew was holding me back. I finally started over with a blank slate.

    Calorie counting supported by a food diary works. Once you have it up and running there’s something about knowing that you will have to log that double cheeseburger that helps keep you in check.

    Last thing. Maybe try this. Next time you find yourself in the drive through, leave. If you can’t escape the line, just don’t order. If you’ve already ordered you should pay. But just because you pay doesn’t mean you have to eat. You can break the cycle with the trash bin. You can even quit in the middle of eating and dump the rest. Try it. I found throwing away food after I paid for it empowering.
  • SarahBSetFree
    SarahBSetFree Posts: 1 Member
    88olds wrote: »
    You can even quit in the middle of eating and dump the rest. Try it. I found throwing away food after I paid for it empowering.

    I have done this a couple of times recently! Threw away half a pop, another time 3 oreos left in the pack, etc. It was very empowering!

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