Terrified of quitting/not losing the weight

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Mahdi22
Mahdi22 Posts: 229 Member
in Motivation and Support
Hey I just wanted to make a post about how I am feeling. I’m currently trying to lose weight by focusing on what I eat. I eat 1800 calories everyday and half my plate is always vegetables for the last 2 weeks. But my weight keeps fluctuating and it makes me doubt myself.

I get negative thoughts like “I can’t lose the weight” or “I’m not good enough” or other small thoughts like that which impact my mental health and make me want to give up.

What can I do to stay positive and not give up? Does anyone have any thing they want to share that can help me.

Also, how can I not think about weight loss during my journey. Like I’m constantly thinking am I losing weight, how much have I lost but I don’t want to have these thoughts. I just want to take it one day at a time and lose weight. If that makes sense

Replies

  • Lietchi
    Lietchi Posts: 6,172 Member
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    The only way to fail is to stop trying 😉

    I find it helpful to focus on other goals and the process of getting healthier and losing weight: increasing my step count, improving my exercise performance, sticking within my calorie goal,...
  • ninerbuff
    ninerbuff Posts: 48,579 Member
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    How much do you have to lose? Are you eating enough to actually support weight loss moderately? Are your expectations too high?

    A.C.E. Certified Personal and Group Fitness Trainer
    IDEA Fitness member
    Kickboxing Certified Instructor
    Been in fitness for 30 years and have studied kinesiology and nutrition
    9285851.png
  • AnnPT77
    AnnPT77 Posts: 32,429 Member
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    I think it may help to get a realistic understanding of how the process works, which is not exactly as many people expect. It's normal for weight to go up and down day to day; fat loss shows up in multi-week trends (changes in average weight, basically). It takes 4-6 weeks to see a valid weight trend from a new routine, and perhaps longer at a slow loss rate (like half a pound a week, which is suitable for people without lots to lose). This is a good read:

    https://physiqonomics.com/the-weird-and-highly-annoying-world-of-scale-weight-and-fluctuations

    Hang in there. Once you have the 4-6 weeks of experiential data, you can adjust your intake if necessary to change your loss rate. (Don't try to lose more than 0.5-1% of current weight per week, though, would be my advice.)

    The only way to fail is to give up. While you're accumulating data, work on things like figuring out which foods help keep you full, how to increase movement in daily life, finding fun ways to exercise, and other things that will make weight management easier and more practical.

    Best wishes!
  • Mahdi22
    Mahdi22 Posts: 229 Member
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    Lietchi wrote: »
    The only way to fail is to stop trying 😉

    I find it helpful to focus on other goals and the process of getting healthier and losing weight: increasing my step count, improving my exercise performance, sticking within my calorie goal,...


    I like that quote you only fail when you stop trying. It’s very powerful and true. I have to remind myself of that.
  • Mahdi22
    Mahdi22 Posts: 229 Member
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    AnnPT77 wrote: »
    I think it may help to get a realistic understanding of how the process works, which is not exactly as many people expect. It's normal for weight to go up and down day to day; fat loss shows up in multi-week trends (changes in average weight, basically). It takes 4-6 weeks to see a valid weight trend from a new routine, and perhaps longer at a slow loss rate (like half a pound a week, which is suitable for people without lots to lose). This is a good read:

    https://physiqonomics.com/the-weird-and-highly-annoying-world-of-scale-weight-and-fluctuations

    Hang in there. Once you have the 4-6 weeks of experiential data, you can adjust your intake if necessary to change your loss rate. (Don't try to lose more than 0.5-1% of current weight per week, though, would be my advice.)

    The only way to fail is to give up. While you're accumulating data, work on things like figuring out which foods help keep you full, how to increase movement in daily life, finding fun ways to exercise, and other things that will make weight management easier and more practical.

    Best wishes!

    Thank you! I am not giving up and therefore I will not fail! I just need more positivity and good energy some days to get rid of the self doubt. I know I can achieve anything I want if I believe in myself. It’s just that I have low confidence and that reflects in my body and mind. Expressing my feelings to this forum is like therapy and I feel better and lighter sharing my thoughts and feelings. I just went on a rant lol but I am definitely trying my best everyday by making better choices.
  • JilBells82
    JilBells82 Posts: 8 Member
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    Keep your head up and just keep pushing forward. Please feel free to add me!!
  • MargaretYakoda
    MargaretYakoda Posts: 2,568 Member
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    Mahdi22 wrote: »
    ninerbuff wrote: »
    How much do you have to lose? Are you eating enough to actually support weight loss moderately? Are your expectations too high?

    A.C.E. Certified Personal and Group Fitness Trainer
    IDEA Fitness member
    Kickboxing Certified Instructor
    Been in fitness for 30 years and have studied kinesiology and nutrition
    9285851.png

    I currently weight 268 pounds (down from my heaviest 275). I think I should weight 160 pounds, so I should lose 100 pounds. I am a male and 25 years old, 5 10 height if that matters. I am eating 1800 calories everyday about 400-500 caloric deficit and I don’t think my expectations are high. But I definitely want to lose the weight as fast as possible if that makes sense. I would like to lose about 50 pounds within 6 months.

    First off, congratulations on the 7 pound loss. That a good start.

    My advice is that if you don’t have a medical reason for needing to lose the weight right away, you’re probably better off taking it a little slower. Your body will be able to adjust to the change in habits easier, and of course you’ll have more time to really ingrain the habits, and they’re more likely to stick long term.

    You can lose weight and you are good enough

    How often are you weighing yourself? Some people find that weighing themselves once a week - as long as they’re being careful about logging what they eat - is easier, because it takes some of the focus off “Am I losing weight now?”
  • autumnblade75
    autumnblade75 Posts: 1,660 Member
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    Not to discourage, but if you're eating at roughly a 500 calorie per day deficit, you *should* lose roughly one pound per week. That won't work out to 50 lbs. in 6 months.

    1000 calories a day sounds awfully steep to me, and a year sounds like a really long time. At first glance, I think I'd split the difference and try for a 750 calorie per day deficit, and hope for a 9 month duration.
  • losing200lbs
    losing200lbs Posts: 18 Member
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    I had been hitting a wall. 4 straight weeks I was doing things well and not losing and some weeks gaining weight. Then suddenly a 10 pound drop this week. If you are eating healthy, exercising it will happen. Bodies are jerks and don't always want to cooperate but eventually it will pay off. Add me on here of you'd like. Stay engaged. Stay the course. Believe in your self. I have constant negative thoughts. Read my page lol. It's mostly me whining. You care enough to be trying, and you care enough to be spending your time writing and reading responses. So deep down inside you know you can do it, you know you are good enough. You can do this.
  • EyeOTS
    EyeOTS Posts: 362 Member
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    Is it all bad, or are there positive parts of the journey you can think of? For me, it's a bunch of highs and lows and I just try to focus on the positive parts like more energy, balance etc.

    7 pounds is a great start. Good luck
  • Mahdi22
    Mahdi22 Posts: 229 Member
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    MargaretYakoda wrote: »
    Mahdi22 wrote: »
    ninerbuff wrote: »
    How much do you have to lose? Are you eating enough to actually support weight loss moderately? Are your expectations too high?

    A.C.E. Certified Personal and Group Fitness Trainer
    IDEA Fitness member
    Kickboxing Certified Instructor
    Been in fitness for 30 years and have studied kinesiology and nutrition
    9285851.png

    I currently weight 268 pounds (down from my heaviest 275). I think I should weight 160 pounds, so I should lose 100 pounds. I am a male and 25 years old, 5 10 height if that matters. I am eating 1800 calories everyday about 400-500 caloric deficit and I don’t think my expectations are high. But I definitely want to lose the weight as fast as possible if that makes sense. I would like to lose about 50 pounds within 6 months.

    First off, congratulations on the 7 pound loss. That a good start.

    My advice is that if you don’t have a medical reason for needing to lose the weight right away, you’re probably better off taking it a little slower. Your body will be able to adjust to the change in habits easier, and of course you’ll have more time to really ingrain the habits, and they’re more likely to stick long term.

    You can lose weight and you are good enough

    How often are you weighing yourself? Some people find that weighing themselves once a week - as long as they’re being careful about logging what they eat - is easier, because it takes some of the focus off “Am I losing weight now?”


    I do it once every 3-4 days. I do it without thinking and because I want to hit 250s (A weight I haven’t been in a long time). It’s like a confirmation that I am doing everything right and losing the weight. After I hit that number I would be less interested in what the scale says because I know I’m heading down the right path if I keep up the healthy eating.
  • AldiAttorney
    AldiAttorney Posts: 14 Member
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    I've been in your position 6 years ago, I know how you feel. I was obese and trying to lose a lot of fat. My progress was slow and it took me 2 years to lose 30 Kg (66 lbs) of fat, but in the end of my 2 years journey I looked good (at that time), felt extremely confident, met the love of my life, and became a father not long after.

    Now I'm back to 'overweight' due to unhealthy and sedentary lifestyle in the past year. I will surely be as patient as I was, as discipline as I was, and as positive as I was. I will commit and reach my goals once again. Lost 14 lbs so far since July 2021, and I intend to slow it down a little bit more so I can have a little bit more rooms for extra calories. I love food.

    Here's a few tips I can share based on my personal experience:
    - First, change your personal goal in your mind from 'losing weight' to 'lifestyle and body transformation'.
    - Know that it WILL take time to lose fat and transform in a healthy way, don't overthink it, take control.
    - Reducing your calorie intakes too much may not help you. Tracking accurately will.
    - The scales may deceive you. Use measuring tapes and take pictures instead. I do it once a week.
    - If you're not in a serious medical condition, exercise hard. Like real hard. Lift weights. Get some dumbbells, or resistance bands. Add cardio if you want. Burn dem fats, give 'em hell!

    Congratulations on the 7 lbs loss, keep it up! We're in this together.
  • Onedaywriter
    Onedaywriter Posts: 324 Member
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    Congrats on the first 7 lbs weight loss! That’s great!! The 1800 cals/day sounds like a good daily target at your height/weight/age.

    Above post has great tips. Especially the “lifestyle change.” Remember- it didn’t take 6 months to get to 275 and it likely won’t take 6 months to reach goal.
    50 lbs in six months is aggressive but not overly so. But remember- that means 1800 calories a day- every day! If you weighed 275 for a long time, likely you’re used to around 2700 cals per day. If you were actually gaining when you started (that was me) you might be used to even more. So it might be hard to hit that every day. Also, as your weight drops, the 1800 calories needs to drop too. But hey- if you lose 35 or 40 lbs in six months wouldn’t that be awesome! Picture yourself 40 lbs lighter!
    It might help to just stop weighing yourself for a few weeks. See what happens. In the beginning I’d get so excited to see a huge weight loss one day and so disappointed to see a huge gain back the next. I stopped weighing for months and was so pleasantly surprised when I went back to the scale. Maybe wait a couple of weeks before weighing again and have faith in your program.
    Try to move more. Any movement helps. Even just walking the dog an extra time or walking around your living room during tv commercials etc
  • Mahdi22
    Mahdi22 Posts: 229 Member
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    Thank you everyone for all the comments. I know I definitely didn’t gain the weight “fast” and therefore I can’t lose it fast either. I have a measuring tape at home and will definitely find it and use it.

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