Relationships

Maybe go to a bar? I always get hit on @ the bars even with my engagement ring on.

Are you making yourself noticable?

There could be alot of diffferent things, did you ever hear of love comes to to those who wait...? Well it's true!

Hang in there!

There is a general perception that guys want thin girls, this is not entirely true but we do appreciate the eye candy. For me passion and romance with a sense of adventure scores top marks.

The biggest question is, what do you seek in a boyfriend?

Also what are you willing to offer?

the problem is your attitude. You shouldn't want to be slim to get a guy, you should want to do it for you and you alone. A guy will like you for your confidence and your power. A guy likes a woman with that kick and drive. That you don't need to be needed. That will get them interested. Sure the looks help, but for real men, that is only skin deep and it is the heart that will keep us interested long after the looks fail. good luck in your search, but you have to love yourself and be happy with who you are before anyone else will fall for you.

Oh, Honey. Been there. I spent 2 & 1/2 years at 150lbs (which is 5lbs more than I weigh NOW, after I've just lost 30lbs) without a bf.

It happens. Sometimes its where you are going & what you are doing. Are you meeting enough new people? Are you putting yourself out there to MEET someone?

I met my current bf of 5 & 1/2 months on eHarmony. I joined January 31, 2011, & was matched with him February 1, 2011. I messaged him... figuring I would never hear back because his photo was just TOO gorgeous... but he DID message me back, & we chatted over 2 mos before we met. Emailing back & forth.

I know it costs a bit... I know. But you meet QUALITY people that are GENUINELY interested (for the most part) in finding an actual, honest, long-term relationship. Mike & I would NEVER have met without eHarmony, we don't run in the same circles AT ALL. But it's good... he's a gym rat, & a health nut, & we're always out, being active, doing things. Biking, hiking, camping, rock climbing, canoeing.

I NEVER would have joined if it wasn't for my Dad pushing me. And I feel he was right to push me; he met my stepmom on the site, proposed 1 year after their first date, & married 6 months after that. They're REALLY very happy now.

You should just try it. Get excited about someone new. :bigsmile:

I don't think it's any one thing that get's a guy's interest. There are several factors you may have not just run into the right guy yet. Plus, there may be guys interested but are afraid to approach you.

On another note, Working out, getting fit, staying healthy, eating right, these are all things you should be doing for yourself, not for a guy. Asking what's the point of all that is like asking "what's the point of staying healthy if a guy's not interested." Staying healthy allows you to enjoy your life more and live longer to spend more time with the friend and family you do have and who care about you. Keep doing this for yourself and sooner or later you'll run into the right guy to spend the rest of your long healthy life with

I agree with this.

Guys do typically want a thinner girl, whos confident and proud of her apearence. But there is much more than that. Some of my girls best qualities are her humor, her sense of adventure, the fact shes so goofy and fun. Just cause your in better shape, which congratulations on, doesnt mean guys instantly line up. You just need to try to put yourself out there now

Honestly, If you don't love you then it is really hard for anyone else too. Work on your confidence and I'm sure you will start turning heads. You are a really pretty girl, but low self esteem can't trump looks.

Chelsea

One suggestion, is to start paying more attention to your body language...for instance, Are you approachable? How often are you smiling? If the vibe you are giving off (of which you may be unaware) is a negative one, it may be keeping the right guy for you from approaching you.

I certainly believe in the law of attraction, I'd suggest getting clear in your mind the type of man you want (qualities and all) write it down, reflect on them, and work on making yourself a better person from within as well, and you'll find the right man will appear.

Best wishes!

Speaking as a man with lots of guy friends, I can say from experience that men are visual creatures. You might have a great personality and a lively sense of humour but that isn't visible from the other side of the room so, honestly, it doesn't count at that stage. Most of the time men filter out women who don't clear certain appearance "hurdles". One of these is weight; whatever the fat acceptance movement would like us to think, most men do not find overweight women attractive. If you're too heavy, you'll likely be excluded from consideration before you even open your mouth.

Is this superficial? It may be, but that's beside the point: this is how men subconsciously reduce the field of potential partners to a manageable size. Anyway, having lost as much weight as you have - and I think you look good - you've put yourself firmly back in the competition. When you've got a man's attention THEN the chemistry and your personality comes into play and that makes all the difference.

I agree with the other comment about losing weight for yourself. You should do it for yourself, it benefits you both directly and (as explained above) indirectly, it gives you more confidence and is easier on the body. You ARE doing the right thing so just keep doing it. After all slim people have difficulty getting BFs too! Good relationships don't happen that easily. Nothing worthwhile does. But it will happen.

SS