eHarmony had made things worse!

BondBomb
BondBomb Posts: 1,781 Member
edited October 2 in Chit-Chat
OK - this may be hard to tell because in my pictures I'm a fatty....but I actually clean up pretty well. And soon (very soon) I WILL be back to being hot again. But I am also a single mother that works from home. So meeting eligible men is difficult. Actually its been pretty much non-existent. So I decided to sign up for an on-line dating site. I chose eHarmony. I have tried match.com before but its like the dating site for the KKK. Every guy on there has that he will date any ethnicity other than African-American. Well hey I can't really knock you for personal preference but its a little weird when you email me and then I see that on your profile. Plentyoffish.com is ok but I wonder about guys that aren't willing to pay for a dating site. Are they really serious?. And Craigslist is like the trailer park of dating sites. It's perfect if you are looking for a 3-some with some guy that wants you to stomp on his man-bits in your stilettos. Which again lead me to eharmony. But they keep setting me up with guys I am not the least bit attracted to. Actually its more like I am physically repulsed by my matches. And because I am 5'3 everyone they set me up with is 5'4. Maybe I am just not ready for all of this. Has anyone actually had any success with on-line dating?
And if you plan to respond with 'im glad I don't have to date anymore' please PM me your address so I can send you some cat poop in the mail.
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Replies

  • Dolphingirlie81
    Dolphingirlie81 Posts: 322
    Actually those websites don't hook you up with physical attraction. They match you by personality traits. Did you have to take some kind of personality test? That's what they base it on. And yea CL is a creepy creepy place. Good luck. Dating nowadays is hard. Same boat as you.
  • BondBomb
    BondBomb Posts: 1,781 Member
    Apparently my excessive video game reference and love of cheese products does not lead to matching with attractive men!
  • appleshells
    appleshells Posts: 165
    OMG I am laughing so hard at your description of the CL dating.
  • Mom2rh
    Mom2rh Posts: 612 Member
    I am so tempted to send you my STBXs address so he will get a nice envelope of cat poop! LOL

    I have heard the same thing from single friends. I shudder at the thought...

    Good luck!
  • scapez
    scapez Posts: 2,018 Member
    Had to reply because I lol'd reading your post. You have a great sense of humor! I've done POF before and can't say I met any true gems there...if and when I go back to that I was thinking of trying Match. I would NEVER consider Craigslist. ICK!

    Sorry Match didn't work out for you...I'm assuming you're looking for open minded men and not necessarily African-American men (only), but are there any sites that cater to the more ethnic peeps?

    I personally don't like sites that feed you potentials - I would rather pick 'em out myself!!!

    Good luck! Online dating can be a tiring process. :yawn:
  • Dolphingirlie81
    Dolphingirlie81 Posts: 322
    What?? There's no attractive guys that loves cheese and play videos games? It's becoming a sad sad world. LOL
  • shiggyshane
    shiggyshane Posts: 215
    Apparently my excessive video game reference and love of cheese products does not lead to matching with attractive men!


    lmao! and yes the dating seen can really suck i feel you pain trust me!!
  • Qarol
    Qarol Posts: 6,171 Member
    Years ago, I spent an obscene amount of time filling out the eHarmany profile questionnaire. Only to have them tell me I was unmatchable. Rude much?

    A year or so later, I tried again with Yahoo Personals. Met my husband. And we lived happily ever after...
  • AlsDonkBoxSquat
    AlsDonkBoxSquat Posts: 6,128 Member
    both my parent in laws had great success with eharmony (one is remarried and the other has been with her bf for 5 or 6 years maybe more). Have you tried "it's just lunch"?
  • pa_jorg
    pa_jorg Posts: 4,404 Member
    A friend and I tried Eharmony at the same time. We kept joking that everyone they sent us looked like Lumberjacks.
  • kapeluza
    kapeluza Posts: 3,434 Member
    nvm
  • jacksonpt
    jacksonpt Posts: 10,413 Member
    FWIW...

    The thing I didn't like about eHarmony was that I couldn't browse people. I had to wait to see who they matched me with, and those were my only options.

    I was on Match for a long time. Had some good first (and only) dates, but there's A LOT of crap on there, and it's kind of like HBO - sign up for a month or 2, see everything your interested in, then come back in 6 months or a year when they have some different movies to offer.

    I had the best luck with FitnessSingles.com. MUCH lower membership, so selection is MUCH lower, but I saw virtually ZERO game playing.

    Good luck.
  • kapeluza
    kapeluza Posts: 3,434 Member
    Wait... if you are a gamer, you haven't met any awesome gamers? My husband and I met on WoW :D
  • dayzeerock
    dayzeerock Posts: 918 Member
    OK - this may be hard to tell because in my pictures I'm a fatty....but I actually clean up pretty well. And soon (very soon) I WILL be back to being hot again. But I am also a single mother that works from home. So meeting eligible men is difficult. Actually its been pretty much non-existent. So I decided to sign up for an on-line dating site. I chose eHarmony. I have tried match.com before but its like the dating site for the KKK. Every guy on there has that he will date any ethnicity other than African-American. Well hey I can't really knock you for personal preference but its a little weird when you email me and then I see that on your profile. Plentyoffish.com is ok but I wonder about guys that aren't willing to pay for a dating site. Are they really serious?. And Craigslist is like the trailer park of dating sites. It's perfect if you are looking for a 3-some with some guy that wants you to stomp on his man-bits in your stilettos. Which again lead me to eharmony. But they keep setting me up with guys I am not the least bit attracted to. Actually its more like I am physically repulsed by my matches. And because I am 5'3 everyone they set me up with is 5'4. Maybe I am just not ready for all of this. Has anyone actually had any success with on-line dating?
    And if you plan to respond with 'im glad I don't have to date anymore' please PM me your address so I can send you some cat poop in the mail.

    Sorry you had those issues with match.com! I met the guy I'm currently seeing on match...he's amazing! He's also African-American, so definitely not KKK. Maybe it's just that way in your area?
  • vim_n_vigor
    vim_n_vigor Posts: 4,089 Member
    Ok, not gonna mail you my address for cat poop. My friend did find some success through eHarmony, but it took a long time. At least it was a good source of constant entertainment when she would talk about the messages she got and how some of her dates went. If you don't mind taking the time, you can find someone that interests you, but you may get a lot of duds first.
  • i_love_vinegar
    i_love_vinegar Posts: 2,092 Member
    I would recommend finding a dating site aimed at a specific demographic.

    I'm not into online dating, although I tried it for a while to help end a relationship (long story). I joined sites for whites/asians lol.

    Those sites will allow you to then narrow down based on personality/hobbies ^^ I'm not sure what kind of guys you like (if you have a preference), but there are a lot of sites out there so...maybe try the above :)
  • maab_connor
    maab_connor Posts: 3,927 Member
    not being entirely straight, i have plenty of issues with eHarmony, so we're just going to glance over that.

    my cousin met his current GF on plentyoffish; it seems like there are a lot of weirdoes, but you can ferret out a few gems.

    a friend had some success with match - at least he met guys who weren't total creeps, so that's something.

    one of my besties tried farmersonly.com - and i don't mention that b/c i think you long for Green Acres, i don't know you enough to judge that, but there are sites for everything. maybe if you googled something that you're looking for and then did a ", dating" the first three are gonna be eHarm, match and fish, but after that you might get some cool sites.
  • Huskeryogi
    Huskeryogi Posts: 578 Member
    I was on Match for a long time. Had some good first (and only) dates, but there's A LOT of crap on there, and it's kind of like HBO - sign up for a month or 2, see everything your interested in, then come back in 6 months or a year when they have some different movies to offer.

    PERFECT description of Match. You are totally better off paying the higher monthly rate for the 1 month membership and then giving it a rest for 6 months.

    eHarmony bugged me too - I'm sorry but I live in Nebraska and they kept sending me matches from Illinois and Minnesota. No thank you.
  • BondBomb
    BondBomb Posts: 1,781 Member
    Years ago, I spent an obscene amount of time filling out the eHarmany profile questionnaire. Only to have them tell me I was unmatchable. Rude much?

    A year or so later, I tried again with Yahoo Personals. Met my husband. And we lived happily ever after...

    Stupid eHarmony! Awesome online dating worked for you though. I am involved in a few activities with friends but having such a young kid its really hard to get out and be as social as I would like.
  • sillygoose1977
    sillygoose1977 Posts: 2,151 Member
    I'm just laughing because I met my bf on Craigslist. He only likes his bits stomped every once in a while. :wink: And I was really only looking for a friend to hang out with and got really lucky with him. Before that I had pretty decent luck on Yahoo personals. I had some great dates with normal guys.
  • jend114
    jend114 Posts: 1,058 Member
    try okcupid.com?
  • SKP1986
    SKP1986 Posts: 392 Member
    try okcupid.com?

    This. I know you said you are iffy about guys that aren't willing to pay for dating site, but I've had luck here before.
  • spicy618
    spicy618 Posts: 2,114 Member
    Blackpeoplemeet.com


    Sorry you aren't having much luck online. However, don't knock POF. I've heard of a number of people who have found their Love on POF. My friend is now married to a man she met on POF.

    Just take your time and ask alot of questions :laugh: . Before you exchange numbers, make sure your correspond thru email a few times. That way if you don't like his convo, you can let him know online and not worry about someone continuing to call.

    I'm no longer on those sites, but I did meet good men on POF but not everyone is a match. :flowerforyou:
  • Dolphingirlie81
    Dolphingirlie81 Posts: 322
    POF is a POS in my opinion. Now I know some people have had luck on some these "Dating Websites" and are now married to their SO. But I have met a few from POF and of course with my luck they turned out to freaks.
  • Sarw27
    Sarw27 Posts: 68 Member
    Try going back into your questionaire and increase the importance you place on physical attraction/attractiveness.
  • Apryl546
    Apryl546 Posts: 909 Member
    try okcupid.com?
    I was just going to say that.

    I had some good experiences with okcupid back when i was in the dating scene.
    They have questionnaires and give you people who are more compatible with the questionnaires . But you are also allowed to browse yourself.
  • Starkle09
    Starkle09 Posts: 238 Member
    I had a friend on mine that tried match before and it matched her with her ex. needless to say she deactivated her account...lol
  • blazergrad
    blazergrad Posts: 603 Member
    I actually met my wife on a site called ChristianCafe.com. Of course, just because it's a "Christian" singles site doesn't mean that there's not going to be some "colorful" characters on there as well ... :ohwell:
  • crazylil1
    crazylil1 Posts: 20
    Plentyoffish.com is excellent free, and its how me and my boyfriend met, we have been together for almost 2 years!
  • billsica
    billsica Posts: 4,741 Member
    Ok, what kind of cat are we talking about? Size wise. Am I going to get a #10 envelope, or like a box?
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