How do you make long term changes?

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Pippin20206
Pippin20206 Posts: 194 Member
in Motivation and Support
Looking for general support and advice on making long term changes. I'm mid 40s, 90kg, 160cm, chronic depression (medicated) and once again trying to lose weight and eat healthy. A couple of weeks back I ended up in hospital passing a gallstone and lord I've never felt pain like that before!

I don't like exercise, the adrenalin makes me feel sick, I don't like most vegetables, I'm used to my nice fatty, sugary, comfort foods and I like to drink and smoke
I've begun a complete change in diet and have lost 3kg down from 93 to 90, but I know this will be hard for me to sustain. Just looking for some support from others thanks.

Replies

  • swimmchick87
    swimmchick87 Posts: 458 Member
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    Make the changes small. I don't really enjoy exercise either, but I got a fitbit and I can manage to make sure I'm taking some extra steps throughout the day. I definitely prefer the "comfort foods" as well. A compromise that was easier for me to make is to have my lunch be "really healthy" and my dinner be more foods that I actually want to eat (ha) as long as it fits into my calorie day. I find that at work, I'm too busy to really enjoy what I'm eating anyway, so it's easier to pack things like fruits, veggies, protein only. I set my weight loss goal to only 1 pound per week so that I get a lot more calories daily; I have plenty of room for treats and don't feel like I'm "white knuckling it." 1 pound per week in the short term feels super slow, but over time it really adds up. It took me forever to figure this out. I'd come to MFP a few times per year, stick to my 1200 calorie goal for a month-6 weeks, lose 8-10 pounds, and then promptly fall off the wagon and gain it all back, often plus more. The one pound per week is actually sustainable for me.
  • Pippin20206
    Pippin20206 Posts: 194 Member
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    Yeah you're totally right. My partner is telling me off for trying to cut out too much all at once. I'm getting withdrawal headaches. I'm letting myself relax a bit on the weekends but I really have to watch the fat content re the gallbladder.
  • Lietchi
    Lietchi Posts: 6,114 Member
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    Generally speaking, habits are something you need to change gradually.
    For example: don't eliminate all of your favorite foods, just eat smaller portions of them and add a portion of your favorite vegetables on the side. Then start some experimenting to find other vegetables and preparation methods (you may think you don't like some vegetables, but prepared a different way you might like them).
    Tackle one habit at a time, don't overwhelm yourself!

    As for exercise, you say you don't like the adrenaline. But exercise doesn't have to be high intensity. Walking is great exercise. Yoga is another option. Don't get stuck on a narrow view of exercise, it can be so many things: waking, yoga, martial arts, strength training, windsurfing, cycling, rowing, ping-pong, rebounding,... There must be something out there you would enjoy or at the very least not dislike, it's just a matter of finding it.
  • 88olds
    88olds Posts: 4,465 Member
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    Do you keep a food diary? Calorie counting supported by a food diary works. But not like most folks would like. It involves a lot of trial error over a significant period of time. Weight loss is mostly about problem solving and persistence.

    What I found out about myself losing weight is I don’t like deprivation and saying no much. But what I can do is accept some reasonable limits and wait awhile for things I really want. Good planning, portion control and delay are effective weight loss tools.

    A food diary is really a set of things to do. Get a food scale to crunch the numbers. Measuring cups are for liquids only. Start logging your intake. I used pen and paper as the computer reminded me of being at work. When you’re ready use the MFP calculator to calculate a calorie deficit aimed at losing 1/2 lb per week. You’ll soon see you have a better chance of hitting your number if you have a plan. Plan your menus around food you like. Try to modify your favorites to make them more plan friendly. If you can’t do that try to limit the portion. If you can’t do that, some things have to be saved for special occasions.

    Keep your food diary no matter what. Log everything. Over your number? Log it. Crazy over? Log it. Don’t know how many calories in a meal or dish? Make a good faith estimate. Everything gets logged with a number. Calorie counting is not very exact. But it doesn’t have to be perfect to work, just consistent.

    Don’t go to pieces when things go awry. If you plan isn’t working at some point, make it better.

    I didn’t start out trying to eat healthy. But what I found was I was just sort of funneled into it as my calorie target went down. It’s easier to live with weight loss if we don’t feel too hungry a lot. And if we are eating lean protein, whole grains and fresh fruit and vegetables we get more to eat. Just how it is. Hope something here helps you. Good luck.
  • springlering62
    springlering62 Posts: 7,447 Member
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    Many of us didn’t enjoy exercise at first. Or thought we didn’t.

    I would much rather be sitting on a sofa reading a book and scarfing M&Ms.

    But once I started exercising, not only did I develop a love for it, I found myself needing and craving movement. Nowadays, I have to bargain with myself to rest and sit down.

    You don’t have to be a bungee jumper or distance bicycler. I don’t do anything wildly athletic I just walk a ton, yoga, mat Pilates, some ridiculously light weightlifting. But it’s a divergent set of activities and I’m consistent with them.

    With consistency comes enjoyment, great physical rewards, and also the ability to eat more, which is pleasant. It’s a great feeling when dinner is done and you’re like,”oh! I’ve got an extra 240 calories left over. Candy bar, cookies, or protein bar?”
  • jugar
    jugar Posts: 10,080 Member
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    This is a wonderful discussion. One thing that can really help is a team where you stick together doing a lot of these things. For a long time. Until it works.

    I found one like that and ended up as one of its leaders. It is a blast! I have been maintaining now for 9 years (since September). Check it out! We have a few teams, each with a different flavour, so it helps to read through a bit of each one to see what clicks. Then join for November and see if it works. If so - stick around until you hit your goal and beyond.

    Have a good look: (team chats under "discussions", general stuff under "announcements")
    https://community.myfitnesspal.com/en/group/114605-fat-2-fit-weight-loss-challenge-and-support-group


    Once you know if it might be for you, sign up:
    https://community.myfitnesspal.com/en/discussion/10847168/registration-for-new-members-november-2021#latest
  • wunderkindking
    wunderkindking Posts: 1,615 Member
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    https://community.myfitnesspal.com/en/discussion/10836356/foundation-foundation-foundation-alternative-title-in-weight-loss-i-am-the-dog#latest

    You might find this useful. Because this is how.
  • Pippin20206
    Pippin20206 Posts: 194 Member
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    Thanks guys, all really good ideas. I'm definitely logging all my food on MFP to track my food diary. I've tweaked my calorie limit a bit to make it a bit more manageable and not be so hard on myself. I'll look into the groups but a little scared if I can't keep up with a group that it will be demotivating or ill get kicked out. I've ordered a step tracker to get an idea of what incidental exercise I'm currently doing and hope as I feel better with diet I'll be more motivated to try some scheduled gentle exercise. Really appreciate the feedback.
  • Xellercin
    Xellercin Posts: 924 Member
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    I personally first start with identifying the barriers to the healthier behaviours in the first place.

    If you want to be living a certain way, and find yourself not living that way, then something is acting as a barrier.

    Typically unhealthy habits are a form of self-medication, so the first question is, what's going on with your life that needs medicating?

    As for the things you "like", well you hit the nail on the head, you are used to them and you utize them as conforts. But self-medication and self-soothing are just habits that can be modified like any other habits.

    As for exercise, I'm not sure why you would have to have a surge of adrenaline. Exercise doesn't even need to be intense. If you are looking to integrate healthier coping mechanisma into your life, then you are best served by finding exercise that you find calming and meditative.

    So first things first, figure out what lifestyle you want. Next, figure out what barriers are holding you back from that lifestyle. And then, start making incremental, step-wise plans to permanently modify your life bit by bit to both remove barriers and introduce more of the desired habits and coping skills.

    It's simple. It's not easy, but it's simple.

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