Starting again

Motivation is the reward, not the impetus.

What you need is discipline. Discipline to do the thing even when you don't want to is the key to success, because as you well know at this point, this isn't a process that's going to take only a week, no matter what Woman's Day tells you.

So you put in the work, day in and day out. You weigh your food, you log it, you stick to your budget. You move your body, as you're able, and choose food to eat to fuel those movements. You do that for several weeks, and as long as you have your budget figured appropriately*, you will see results, whether on the scale or in the mirror. Let that be your motivation to continue.

(*A note on this: figuring out your personal calorie needs is a process that necessarily requires some trial and error, and that will necessarily take more than a week to dial in, on both sides of the CICO equation. On the CI side, the database is full of bogus entries; there is a learning curve to finding accurate entries or using the Recipe Builder/Meals feature to log home-cooked foods, as well as weighing/measuring everything if you aren't used to doing so yet. On the CO side, any calorie calculator, including this one, is going to be making estimates based on broad population averages - your specific human body is going to deviate from that to some degree, and some people deviate quite far from the average for someone of their age, height, weight, and sex. There is no direct way to measure an individual human person's daily calorie burn; even if you have a wearable device of some kind that purports to track calories burned, it's making an estimate based on your heart rate and your age/height/weight/sex as reported to the app. It is necessary to start with what MFP gives you, and gather data for several weeks - at least two menstrual cycles if your body does that - and see if your weight is changing in the expected direction and at the expected rate before you should start tweaking anything. For women especially, our cycling hormones play hell with water retention, which can make for some wild-looking scale data.)

I'm a skeptic about motivation, but also someone who' not all that good at discipline. I lost weight anyway, and have kept it off for 6+ years.

For starters, don't try to make it fast. Try to make it easy.

Do things that are practical for you to do.

Eat foods that you like eating.

Increase movement in your life by moving more in reasonably enjoyable ways. That can be formal exercise (but even that needn't be miserable in order to be effective). It can be other things, though: Playing with kids, dancing to the radio, walking in the park, etc.

If you do choose to exercise, don't devote so much time that you mess up your good life balance. You still need time and energy for job, family, friends, etc. Start slow and easy, maybe just 2-3 times a week, with rest days between. As you get fitter, you can increase duration, intensity or frequency to keep a little bit of a challenge, but good life balance. Chose exercise types that are reasonably enjoyable, in locations that are convenient and affordable.

Maybe think of it not so much as "trying to lose weight" but instead as "experimenting to find new, happy habits that will gradually bring you to a healthy weight, and keep you there permanently". Just make changes in a practical way over time, heading in a positive direction.

Don't define foods as "good" or "bad". You need balance in your overall eating, not just nutritional balance and reasonable calories, but also enjoyment and practicality, among other things.

Even more so, don't define yourself as "good" or "bad" depending on whether your plan is working well or not. If it's not working, adjust the plan and go on. Just. Keep. Going.

This is not some kind of epic battle between good and evil. Being overweight is not a sin, so we don't need to suffer to expiate it. Drama is optional. Being miserable burns no extra calories, is stressful, feels bad. Don't go there.

You can do this. Just start, make adjustments to plans when needed, don't stop.