Commenting on other people food diaries?
gentle_sir_hulk
Posts: 52 Member
I am proud I have been logging all my food and drink since I started here, in June.
I love looking at other people's diaries because I learn so much. But sometimes I want to comment on people's diary - how much sugar they eat, their choices or even little things, like I see they record food that has wrong nutritients listed (e.g. bread that has calories listed but no carbs).
What do people think about commenting on other people's food diaries? Is this creepy or should it be encouraged? I would like to do it, but I am note sure people like it.
I love looking at other people's diaries because I learn so much. But sometimes I want to comment on people's diary - how much sugar they eat, their choices or even little things, like I see they record food that has wrong nutritients listed (e.g. bread that has calories listed but no carbs).
What do people think about commenting on other people's food diaries? Is this creepy or should it be encouraged? I would like to do it, but I am note sure people like it.
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Replies
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I think if someone wants your opinion on their diary they'll ask for it, either by making a thread here or posting a status in their feed, soliciting that information.23
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That's really going to depend on the person. And your tone/approach.
If someone pointed out a very wrong food entry in my diary, sure. Asking questions about the foods I consume, sure.
But commenting (=judging) my sugar intake or some other aspect, yeah no. It's not creepy, but it's not welcome either. My diary is open to show that you can lose weight/be at a healthy weight and not only eat 'health' foods, it's not an invitation to be critiqued 😉
It might be different for people who you know are struggling or still trying to figure things out. For example, if someone complains about being hungry all the time, pointing out low protein intake or lots of sugary/fast carb foods and suggesting things that person can try to not be so hungry, that might be more acceptable. But no guarantee the person on the receiving end will appreciate the remark.
Whereas "OMG, I can't believe how much sugar you're eating, that's awful", that's just a bad idea all around 😉
Obviously, it's going to matter a lot as well whether or not you know these people whose diaries you're commenting on. I wouldn't recommend randomly commenting on diaries of people you don't know, it's a bit different if you're friends with people.11 -
goal06082021 wrote: »I think if someone wants your opinion on their diary they'll ask for it, either by making a thread here or posting a status in their feed, soliciting that information.
THIS!!!!
You've only been here a little over 6 months. PLEASE don't be *that* person.14 -
LOL I already think this thread should be moved to the debate section.2
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I think if you know the person or someone asks then maybe but the whole point of counting calories is being able to spend them how you'd like. I eat ramen and oreos and all kinds of stuff to go with my vegetables and fish and would unfriend someone quickly for unsolicited criticism6
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Maybe you shouldn't be reading other people's diaries, if it's for anything other than supporting your own journey.
Even a trained nutritionist needs to be invited, and paid for their advice, rather than providing it unsolicited to Becky at the BBQ with the sausage in her hand.
There is more than one way to skin a cat, you'll see this as you move through your journey. The biggest thing you need to ask yourself is, are you supporting someone by commenting, or are you potentially setting their journey backwards.
Maybe that diary your reading was not even being tracked 3 months earlier, and these are the first steps the person is taking to change their lifestyle, or maybe this is just the way they choose to eat.
My diary vs my knowledge base are worlds apart right now, which is probably important to consider before offering unsolicited advice, maybe that person you're about to provide advice to, has a wealth of knowledge, far exceeding your own knowledge base, maybe they're still putting the pieces together to get back on track, and you pulling apart their choices is not what they need, I kinda think it actually goes against the Myfitnesspal community also.
Big solid, No, for unsolicited advice.13 -
Yep, I'd mind my own business unless asked.7
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Agree with all the above. Also, you don't know what plan someone else is following. I've seen days that make me amazed how someone could eat that much, but realized they are calorie cycling and have other days where they eat MUCH less.3
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I wouldn't appreciate comments like that about my diary (probably why I decided not to keep it open )4
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paperpudding wrote: »I wouldn't appreciate comments like that about my diary (probably why I decided not to keep it open )
Exactly. If you don't know anything about my lifestyle, my goals, or my personal preferences, you'd better have a pretty big pair to try to come over here and tell me to change what/how I eat. That's a quick ticket to GFY-land.4 -
My initial response was thinking the op was randomly looking at people's diaries and wanting to mansplain how they're doing it wrong but good point on if he actually knows the people.
Personally, I keep my diary private but I'm VERY open about how I'm not the healthiest of eaters and pretty much live off cookies. I still lost a hell of a lot of weight and haven't keeled over from the sugar so...yeah, only speak when spoken to.4 -
Some enjoy looking for food ideas but I've never looked at diaries. Others keep entries private because they don't want the food police knocking on their door. They just enjoy having a place of their own.1
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I think these are all valid points. Yes, I can see how comments can be an intrusion into privacy.
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Personally, I'm fine with people reading and asking questions about my diary. I'm a distinctly sub-par MFP friend, but on some threads where people were asking about vegetarian eating, when it was appropriate, I'd tell them to friend me if they wanted to see what I eat to get protein or the like. (I've been veg for 47+ years.)
If someone criticizes what I eat, it will probably make me think not well of them, mostly (unless I think they're right!) . . . but it won't hurt my ego. Sadly, my ego is much stronger than being wounded by comments from random online strangers.
If/when you comment, it matters what you say and how you say it, IMO.
I'm completely open to "how did you prepare XYZ veggie" or "did you like those tofu noodles" or "what does that brand of ABC taste like" or whatever.
Want to tell me I shouldn't have the occasional over-goal-calorie day, drink some wine sometimes, eat something deep fried, be willing to eat 200G+ carbs daily? I'm going to be amused, maybe respond sarcastically. I try not to be truly mean to ignorant people, though, honestly. Sometimes I succeed.9 -
Hi, haven't logged in for years and they still had my account info. My weight is well controlled, but I have stage 4 kidney disease and need to limit my protein to about 35 grams a day. That's not easy to do. Hoping to find someone to buddy with to share recipes because the diet is very restricted on salt, phosphates, and other Trace minerals, as well as dairy and red meat. Keeping a food diary has been vital for staying on tract. Would appreciate any comments. Thanks.4
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goal06082021 wrote: »I think if someone wants your opinion on their diary they'll ask for it, either by making a thread here or posting a status in their feed, soliciting that information.
THIS!!!!
You've only been here a little over 6 months. PLEASE don't be *that* person.
This. 100%3 -
Chef_Barbell wrote: »goal06082021 wrote: »I think if someone wants your opinion on their diary they'll ask for it, either by making a thread here or posting a status in their feed, soliciting that information.
THIS!!!!
You've only been here a little over 6 months. PLEASE don't be *that* person.
This. 100%
Welcome back!2 -
I dunno. Try it and let us know how it goes.
I closed my diary partly for this reason. I find it very intrusive if people start telling me what to do UNLESS I ask them first.7 -
snowflake954 wrote: »Chef_Barbell wrote: »goal06082021 wrote: »I think if someone wants your opinion on their diary they'll ask for it, either by making a thread here or posting a status in their feed, soliciting that information.
THIS!!!!
You've only been here a little over 6 months. PLEASE don't be *that* person.
This. 100%
Welcome back!
Never left 😂🤷♀️0 -
Chef_Barbell wrote: »goal06082021 wrote: »I think if someone wants your opinion on their diary they'll ask for it, either by making a thread here or posting a status in their feed, soliciting that information.
THIS!!!!
You've only been here a little over 6 months. PLEASE don't be *that* person.
This. 100%
Dunning-Kruger effect!2 -
Chef_Barbell wrote: »snowflake954 wrote: »Chef_Barbell wrote: »goal06082021 wrote: »I think if someone wants your opinion on their diary they'll ask for it, either by making a thread here or posting a status in their feed, soliciting that information.
THIS!!!!
You've only been here a little over 6 months. PLEASE don't be *that* person.
This. 100%
Welcome back!
Never left 😂🤷♀️
Haven't seen you posting.1 -
snowflake954 wrote: »Chef_Barbell wrote: »snowflake954 wrote: »Chef_Barbell wrote: »goal06082021 wrote: »I think if someone wants your opinion on their diary they'll ask for it, either by making a thread here or posting a status in their feed, soliciting that information.
THIS!!!!
You've only been here a little over 6 months. PLEASE don't be *that* person.
This. 100%
Welcome back!
Never left 😂🤷♀️
Haven't seen you posting.
Not much to say that hasn't been said many times plus this new layout sucks.5 -
How would I get to see someone's diary. Sometimes I would like to see how others are eating so I can make adjustments to my choices because somehow I think they can be better. But if someone wants to visit mine diary and make some suggestions I would appreciate that very much.0
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Are they ASKING for your opinion or advice? No? Then STFU.
I do not ever look at my friends diaries UNLESS they are ASKING for advice or have a question. Even then, I answer the question asked and have no opinion on WHAT they are eating, unless of course the question pertains to that.
As for me, opinions on what I eat are unwelcome. I do have my diary open, for the simple fact to show people you CAN eat normal regular foods and eat out and eat cookies and crap food and STILL lose weight. Like @AnnPT77, though, my ego is far stronger than comments from random online food police. My weight loss speaks for itself.7 -
Well, just think about this from the big picture perspective:
Your comments about food choices are mostly opinions and even when generally correct are debatable. You could easily be 100% correct (like my brother in law) and walk up to someone and say: "man you would do well to lose a few pounds, eh."
Now would you do that? If so, you will probably be telling them that they eat too much sugar or processed food or whatnot. And, I think we would all do well not to respond even to an inquiry like: "do you think I eat too much processed food?" Its like: "do I have a big belly?" Or, "do my legs look fat to you?"3 -
Chef_Barbell wrote: »snowflake954 wrote: »Chef_Barbell wrote: »snowflake954 wrote: »Chef_Barbell wrote: »goal06082021 wrote: »I think if someone wants your opinion on their diary they'll ask for it, either by making a thread here or posting a status in their feed, soliciting that information.
THIS!!!!
You've only been here a little over 6 months. PLEASE don't be *that* person.
This. 100%
Welcome back!
Never left 😂🤷♀️
Haven't seen you posting.
Not much to say that hasn't been said many times plus this new layout sucks.
This new layout really does suck. Does the site have a feature to make the screen darker?0 -
I used to have my diary open but closed it long ago from the unsolicited comments
Things like "omg I would never eat that" answering with "well then it's a good job it's me eating then" was met with "if you care about your health you wouldn't eat anything processed"
Sod right off with that.
If you've not been asked to comment on someone's food then hold the comments deep down inside yourself6 -
How much sugar or anything else I eat is not anyone's business. I would not care for unsolicited opinions.
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I have to laugh. If anyone’s looked, they haven’t dared ask.
If someone looked at my diary, their head would spin and they’d probably think I was a fraud or a troll. Or that I was OCD and ate pretty much the same thing every day until those days I bust wildly loose and eat everything that isn’t nailed down.
They’d be right on all counts, lololol.
And, still, I hang in there. 🤗
….mmmmmm……marzipan…….4 -
Common misconception is that everyone is here for exactly the same reasons...this is false. People are here for a myriad of reasons. Some to lose weight, some to gain weight, some to thrive with their fitness, bodybuilding, etc. Some people log with great precision...others are more lose. Some people are really into nutrition and others just want to make sure their calories are in line with what they need for their weight management goals. It's really nobody's business unless they ask for your input.9
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