Help please.....

You can't change the past - the binges are history. By eating well, and getting exercise, you will start to feel better.

You know you can lose weight, so just take one step at a time. Work out what needs to be done, and do the most urgent/important things first.

Good luck

The odd binge is something which most of us live with. I used to get like you - depressed and fed-up with myself. Now, a long time ahead of those days, I do still have a binge occasionally, but I tell myself off (not too harshly!!) to put it behind me and carry on again. Like the rest of us, you are human after all! After my husband was ill, I regained the 7 lbs I had lost while he was ill, but am now back on track. You will be too, be sure of that, and love yourself - it will help to give you confidence.:flowerforyou: :flowerforyou:

Well, the practical stuff first: I agree with Jennie. Don't let the binges become another big emotional thing you have to deal with.

Chances are you haven't done *that* much damage. And if the scales show a big increase, don't panic - most of that will be water from the now unaccustomed fats and salts in the food.

On the emotional side - I'm really so sorry that you're having such a hard time, lovely. This is definitely the toughest part of trying to get healthier. Eating to self-soothe is such a natural thing to do - it's what babies do, it's how babies form their first attachment, it's what we learn as our first form of emotional comfort. Physical and emotional nurture *are* intertwined.

It's not an easy thing to unlearn when that pattern's gone a bit wonky, and when the nurturance we give ourselves with food has become a bit toxic because we're feeding ourselves 'comfort' food that isn't really terribly good for us. A few things that I find help me. First is asking myself whether this big wedge of cheese, chocolate, crisps, whatever, is really going to have any actual impact on the circumstances making me feel cruddy. Second, I have choices available to me that i know make me feel good, but that aren't unhealthy. Cherries and mangoes work for me, as does, bizarrely, rice and beans (carribean style - very earth-mothery and works better for me than mash potato!). Finally, if I'm feeling particularly like I don't want to get out of bed, and really want to sink under the duvet with a box of chocolates and stay there till spring.... I force myself out of bed, and I go to the gym. Because I'm trying to teach myself that looking after myself means looking after myself, not filling myself up with junk.

There's no miracle solution to it, and it took me a while to really change my mind about my need for comfort food. I certainly still have major lapses - I think we all do. The trick, I think, to sustainable weightloss, is not to let those lapses knock you off course. Dusting yourself off and getting back on the horse is the only way forward.

I do hope this doesn't sound all worthy and smug - I hope you know I'm neither of those things! But this is what works for me, with all my depressive, anxious, dysfunctional eating stuff. If I can help at all, just shout. xxxx