40 yo mom, 150+ to lose, at rock bottom. HELP.

eld6md
eld6md Posts: 3 Member
in Motivation and Support
Hello. I am a 40 y.o. mom of 2 and I have battled my weight since childhood. I have gone up and down countless times, using many different programs, through my youth, my formative years, my failed marriage, and now my childrens youth. My son will be 15 in August and my daughter will be 13 in May. I have robbed them of most of their childhood experiences because of my limitations. I am ready to turn things around for all three of us, because I am at my highest weight ever and feel like I can barely function. My kids also need to lose some excess weight. Please help with insight, inspiration, and friend-adds from people with like-goals. Thank you in advance and I look forward to an interchange of encouragement.
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Replies

  • healingmysticmelody
    healingmysticmelody Posts: 58 Member
    Hi :) I was a single mother for my daughter’s entire childhood. I understand the feeling of wanting my child to have the best (like she deserves) and I have felt “too tired” for all of the things I wanted to do. It probably hurts me more than it hurt her growing up. I gave her more than most two parent households in this world. Most importantly, she knows she is loved. Though a few times in her teen years she went through the “nobody loves me” phase. It passed.
    But I do feel my emotional eating habits have done her a disservice. When I had mom control over her eating habits it stayed in check. Now she is “an adult” and keeps gaining. I guess the best we can do is to make these small changes become lifestyle changes that last. We can set a good example!

    I have also felt like I can barely function for the last few years after some health problems. I am doing baby steps and each day things are more positive. I don’t do my very best one week a month but this month, thanks to this app, I stayed within my calorie goals.
  • LynneM1980
    LynneM1980 Posts: 102 Member
    Hello! I can understand where you are coming from totally. My total need to lose is about 165 lbs. I've also got three kids, and missed out on a LOT when they were younger because I was just too heavy to do anything. I'm 41 now, with a 2 year old grandson, and I need to get my butt into gear. We've got this!
  • positiveyou1
    positiveyou1 Posts: 10 Member
    As it’s been a life long habit , your gonna have attachments and associated foods to issues — So first you will need to resolve those with a counsellor.. Not resolving the past will hinder your future progress — So that would be your first step, followed by getting a full physical check up and then start making plans
  • clair1508
    clair1508 Posts: 7 Member
    Hi, im a disabled mum and am struggling to lose weight. Having others to talk to helps me so if you'd like to add me as a friend you can.x
  • bionicrooster
    bionicrooster Posts: 353 Member
    you can add me as a friend, but as you start this remember one thing, you can do this. Its not rocket science, its not magic. If you work hard and stick to it, you can do it! Stay positive, be patient with yourself and the results, and log in every day! Wishing you the best of luck!
  • KobiHensley
    KobiHensley Posts: 78 Member
    I was a single mom of two so I know how you're feeling. You have lots of responsibility and things going on at the same time. You have to still take care of yourself, even though lots of times it doesn't seem a priority with all you have on your plate.

    Try making one change a week, it worked for me. I first started out just logging my food, then finding substitutes for four things that are unhealthy, next drink water, then start walking, etc. If I tried to change everything at once it was overwhelming.

    Please friend me, I would be happy to chat.
  • Sinisterbarbie1
    Sinisterbarbie1 Posts: 711 Member
    These tips are all amazing and i agree! I would also encourage anyone who hasnt done so yet and has a lot of weight to lose or is over 27 BMI and has additional health issues like hypertension, high cholesterol, fatty liver, pre diabetes or diabetes to visit a dr who specializes in weight loss/endocrinology. They can often prescribe supportive medications - you still have to do the same work you are going to do here and it will by no means be a quick fix, but obesity does have hormonal and other metabolic links the impact of which can be lessened, allowing you additional support to get over some of the bigger challenges. There is no such thing as a magic pill, and you need to evaluate pros and cons with your dr but a lot of the therapies currently being prescribed and finding success are higher/different dosing patterns of diabetes drugs, others are drugs that have helped people with other types of addictions manage cravings, and sometimes a dr can review medicines an obese person is on for other things and suggest alternative therapies for you to discuss with your primary care physician that dont come with weight gain or bloating.
  • Sinisterbarbie1
    Sinisterbarbie1 Posts: 711 Member
    To be clear I am not recommending any of the diet pill and hormone injection weight plan pushing doctors you see in ads on the internet but a legitimate endocrinologist specializing in weight loss, preferably associated with a teaching hospital.
  • ThreeReasonsToChange
    ThreeReasonsToChange Posts: 15 Member
    Add me!!! We can motivate each other to reach our goals!
  • djlmb2020
    djlmb2020 Posts: 2 Member
    Add me, op and any one who would like to 😊
    I'm in need of friends too, similar story. 38yo, probably Ed, mum of two teens, feel like it's been years since I could be any kind of normal mum really. My weight has just gone up and up until even walking to dentist appointments is impossible and my husband has to do it I have about 200lb to lose to be anywhere near fit and healthy, which is a massive daunting task, but I need to be positive and literally think one meal at a time.
  • tahm42
    tahm42 Posts: 4,964 Member
    All you ladies would benefit from the support of a group that allows you to have your own thread to document your journey and offers support. https://community.myfitnesspal.com/en/group/3322-losing-100-pounds-without-surgery this is the link to join.
    This is a supportive, non-judgmental community of people who have opted to get rid of 100+ pounds without weight loss surgery.

    We have no stringent posting rules, except to please be respectful of other members. Solicitations of products are not permitted and violate MFP's terms of service. Any posts soliciting a particular product will be removed.

    Any discussion of a medical nature is not to be construed as medical advice. Please consult your physician for medical concerns and/or questions regarding your medical condition.

    Due to the personal nature of some of our topics/posts and, in order to protect the privacy of our members, our group is set to "Private." Please don't let that stop you from sending a join request. We welcome all those that are serious about getting to a healthier weight.
  • angiesfitadventure
    angiesfitadventure Posts: 25 Member
    Hi! Late 30s here. Happy to be an accountability buddy. No kids yet. But definitely know what it’s like to fluctuate in weight and bounce back and forth with diets. I have 120 lbs to lose. I’ve lost 70lbs before doing a low carb living. Gained it back because I didn’t properly handle my emotional eating. You can do this! One day, one step at a time! You’ve got this! 😊
  • momx4hill
    momx4hill Posts: 22 Member
    Hi, I am a 40 year old mom. I have 4 children. After the last two (twins) I suffered severe PPD. I gained 100 lbs. Just within the last year have I been able to stop eating my feelings. I have went back to work and that helped mentally, to be able to talk to grown ups. And before my twins I was following Trim Healthy Momma and lost a lot of weight. But I have struggled to get back on plan. Until this year. I was going to start January 1st but covid had other plans for me. So I started January 24th. I have lost 19.8 pounds since I restarted but 29.8 lbs since I last logged into mfp a year ago. I finally feel like I have settled back in the groove of losing weight and making healthy decisions. My babies (well they are big kids now) my hubby and especially MYSELF deserve a healthy me. Add me and we can keep each other encouraged!
  • Nettabee
    Nettabee Posts: 296 Member
    I'm not a mom but I also have 150lbs+ to lose and would love to build a great support network and encourage one another!
  • momx4hill
    momx4hill Posts: 22 Member
    Hope your Saturday is great one. Stay focused, I am cheering for you!
  • Izatar
    Izatar Posts: 6 Member
    Best Wishes to you. I am struggling too, with another loss of 91 pounds needed. We can overcome so much, but it is a huge challenge.
  • 1KiwiShellM
    1KiwiShellM Posts: 10 Member
    I am a little older than you . But I also have battled with my weight since I was a kid. I brought both my kids up on my own . And I think one good parent is better than two fighting ones or disfunctional ones . I did my best , but it can be hard. Add me if you like .
    Shell

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