Women in Menopause tips and support for these changing times

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I am just entering menopause and feel that my body has changed so radically despite a decent diet and lots of exercise. Nothing seems to help me lose the weight that I gained in this last year. I'd like to start a support group for women like me who just want to feel happy and positive despite the radical changes in hormonal level. I'm open to suggestions and help. Let's share our tips and knowledge about how to lose weight after you enter menopause.
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  • not_my_first_rodeo
    not_my_first_rodeo Posts: 311 Member
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    My experience with peri menopause was that it was a wild ride. I am finally done and I feel like I found myself again. It’s taking me longer to lose the weight this time, but it is slowly coming off. You may want to look into supplements to help with some of the symptoms (consulting with your gyn of course).
  • Sinisterbarbie1
    Sinisterbarbie1 Posts: 712 Member
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    I entered menopause as a result of chemo 5+ years ago, so it happened all at once after my first chemo treatment. I experienced a lot of other wild symptoms that may or may not have been menopause related, the worst of which were ungodly night sweats and hot flashes. Part of that was likely chemo related because it has gotten a lot better. That coupled with the general malaise and fatigue of chemo and cancer slowed me down a lot and eventually after I finished my treatments I found myself on a wide variety of medicines and not feeling like myself. I gained a TON of weight. I was able to lose it all and more so there is nothing stopping one from being successful at weight loss in menopause, but I do think there are various non-metabolic things like hot flashes, insomnia, and fatigue, and at least in my case a fairly decent dose of depression, that can conspire to make you do things that are counterproductive to weight maintenance or weight loss until you sort out how to manage those issues.
    I did not take estrogen supplements, though my oncologist says I could have because my cancer was not hormone driven. Depending on your breast and ovarian cancer risk profile it is something worth discussing with a knowledgable doctor if symptoms are terrible. I did take Venflexamine (an antidepressant) for a while which helped both with mood and night sweats/insomnia. It was weight neutral in the beginning, but after about a year when I was struggling with weight my weight loss doctor advised weaning off of it if I didn’t need it for mood.
    Its all so delicate to manage … but you should definitely speak up to your doctor about whatever you are feeling. It is crazy that women suffer with period related issues for the first half of their adult lives and then menopausal issues at the peak/second half of their career and family lives. Setting aside any aesthetic and weight issues, we deserve to enjoy our lives and health to the fullest.
  • knotmel
    knotmel Posts: 80 Member
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    I finished my comment and realized I didn’t focus on your goal for this thread at all: being happy and sharing tips! I like your aim, because I think some of the suffering is absolutely my attitude toward being in peri more than peri itself. I guess my tips are: avoid alcohol, use a weight trending app, have some patience and a sense of humor, and (we’ll see if I follow my own advice here) maybe open up and discuss it with others. It’s been helpful just writing my earlier comment in response to your post, and seeing that makes me think maybe I should bring this up with (trusted) friends as well.
  • not_my_first_rodeo
    not_my_first_rodeo Posts: 311 Member
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    There are various online groups out there that I found helpful. A few on FB for instance. The hardest things for me were the hot flashes, the brain fog, and the insomnia. Being so tired meant exercise went out the window for me. I couldn't get estrogen because there's a family history of breast cancer, but I did take Black Cohosh and a few other things that helped alleviate some of the symptoms. Again, talk with your gynecologist about options. You'll want to develop good sleep hygiene habits to help mitigate the insomnia. Although to be honest, when the night sweats would occur nothing kept me asleep. During the peak of the pandemic, I think I took my temperature more times then I had my entire life (despite feeling like you're on fire in the middle of a hot flash you won't have a temperature).

    I'd also suggest cutting back/cutting out caffeine because that will help with the hot flashes. Most of the foods they recommend you eat/don't eat are probably going to help with weight loss so that can mitigate things. For me, the insomnia was so bad it was extra hard to even do meal prep and that made it all so much worse.

    The first few years, my cycle was all over the place so as <a href="https://community.myfitnesspal.com/en/profile/1002663880/knotmel">knotmel</a&gt; said that may mess with the bloating, etc. I was frank about what was going on with people, but I had to be. I was ripping off layers in winter and opening windows and people thought I was crazy. You'll find when/if you do discuss it, everyone has a different experience. I met women who skipped a period and then 365 days were done. It took me like 5-7 years to be done.
  • RubyRed427
    RubyRed427 Posts: 4,192 Member
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    Thanks everyone for your comments. I really appreciate it! I am learning more and more. For awhile, I was on a low dose of hormone replacement but decided to go off of them after one year. I think they helped a lot! I felt calm and was at a good weight overall. My hot flashes went away. Then, my insurance company said they would not pay for this hormone replacement anymore. So, my doctor and I decided I'd try without it. I have increased my alcohol intake which for sure has not helped my weight gain. Empty calories = belly fat. I know I must reduce those empty calories.

    I have increased my exercise which I enjoy and find to be a great stress release.
    At work, I find that my friends and I tend to snack in the afternoon- we're always saying "does anyone have chocolate?" I know that doesn't help. We are trying to cope with a very stressful job and chocolate helps us emotionally.

    I think I'll just try low carb if possible during my meals. Carbs tend to linger on my curvy figure and make it curvier!

    I've tried the Whole 30 in the past which was effective but narrows down your food choices for a month. It's doable just takes diligence.
    I do know some ladies have mentioned taking the supplement black cohosh for meno symptoms.
  • glassyo
    glassyo Posts: 7,644 Member
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    I don't think anyone's asked this yet but in the time you couldn't lose weight and you were eating healthy and exercising, were you also counting calories?

    (I'm one of those whose peri menopause days were fairly easy going.)
  • RubyRed427
    RubyRed427 Posts: 4,192 Member
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    glassyo wrote: »
    I don't think anyone's asked this yet but in the time you couldn't lose weight and you were eating healthy and exercising, were you also counting calories?

    (I'm one of those whose peri menopause days were fairly easy going.)

    I was not counting calories. But I have just started counting a week ago.
  • lulalacroix
    lulalacroix Posts: 1,082 Member
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    I lost weight during perimenopause and am losing weight again during menopause. I gained much of my weight back during covid. Ugh. I don't think I had a more difficult time losing weight. We just have to make sure we continue to be active because it's very easy to get someone else to lug our groceries and carry boxes, etc - all which adds to the amount of calories we burn each day.

    The worst for me were the hot flashes. They were so horrible. Black Cohosh worked for me, until it didn't anymore. I found 1 alcoholic drink to be a trigger along with even the smallest amount of stress. Now that I'm in menopause, I have much fewer flashes.
  • RubyRed427
    RubyRed427 Posts: 4,192 Member
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    I do agree with you. Alcohol can trigger menopause symptoms- especially hot flashes.
    I have logged all my food this week and that is a good start. I also exercised a lot- elliptical, strength training classes, and a 13 mile bike ride. Hope the increased movement will also help.
  • Sinisterbarbie1
    Sinisterbarbie1 Posts: 712 Member
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    I am jumping on to agree with the alcohol makes night sweats worse comments, I don’t drink at all anymore and I don’t really have night sweats either anymore.
    On the point about being in peri menopause early and not wanting to share with friends as a result, you will be surprised how many women go through menopause early for a variety of natural reasons like yours and ones like mine. You are not alone. Also the more we allow people to make us feel like freaks for having bodies that function like god intended them to the more we encourage the disrespect and ageism you (and I too) fear. In what world does it make sense that one’s brain cells dry up along with her ovaries?
  • lulalacroix
    lulalacroix Posts: 1,082 Member
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    On the point about being in peri menopause early and not wanting to share with friends as a result, you will be surprised how many women go through menopause early for a variety of natural reasons like yours and ones like mine. You are not alone. Also the more we allow people to make us feel like freaks for having bodies that function like god intended them to the more we encourage the disrespect and ageism you (and I too) fear. In what world does it make sense that one’s brain cells dry up along with her ovaries?

    I just wanna add to this. I decided when I started perimenopause that I would talk about it, and I have. This is a major change in our lives and why should we have to hide it? I don't even understand why it would make anyone uncomfortable.
  • Mouse_Potato
    Mouse_Potato Posts: 1,499 Member
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    I'm 48 and I've been in peri for about 3-4 years now. As long as I keep tracking and logging, I haven't noticed much difference in my weight loss. I've been (mostly) in maintenance for several years now, just fighting a few vanity pounds after each vacation/holiday. My biggest issues are the hot flashes and the brain fog. I started a new job last month and the brain fog is making it hard to navigate the new environment. Like, I've got 25 years experience in my field, but I feel completely clueless when my manager asks me to do something! :lol:

    As for the hot flashes, I can't figure out my triggers. I've had them horribly the last few days, but I've also been taking medicine for a sinus infection and its very high in sodium, so that could be one. It seems like we all have different triggers. I tend to get them after I wash my hair (???) and when I'm on the phone (stress?), but I haven't found anything else consistent.

    Oh, I went through a two-month period where I just stopped needing as much sleep. Like, I was getting 5-6 hours a night and felt fine. I've gone back to my usual 8-9 since then, but I really have no explanation for why that happened. I was going to bed at my usual time, but I kept waking up early, ready to go. <shrug>
  • ythannah
    ythannah Posts: 4,368 Member
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    I'm 58 (almost 59) and have been in a combination of peri and menopause since age 48. Can't use periods as a benchmark as I had a hysterectomy at age 33. All I know is I've spent the last 10 years with night sweats, insomnia, hot flashes and an overall intolerance to heat. I used to be one of those people who was always cold when no one else was, now I have two fans going almost nonstop in my office. I've had a few hot flashes that were so intense I've fainted.

    My struggle (all my life, not just now) has been more with keeping weight on rather than losing it so I can't speak to that aspect. Stress has a tendency to melt weight off me and I have more of that going on now than in my younger years.

    So age 48 was my wake-up call and I started resistance training to preserve bone density. Even so, I watched my body composition change drastically over the next year or so, it was like what little muscle I had just evaporated. I increased my protein intake and took up weight lifting. I've managed to build muscle, more than I had as a younger woman in fact, but just learned that I do have quite severe osteoporosis already.

    Sleep deprivation tends to make me crankier than usual :D and I have physical anxiety without mental anxiety symptoms. What I mean by that is a constant feeling of heightened adrenaline, like a 33 rpm record being played at 45 rpm (we should all be old enough to understand that reference, lol). It's disconcerting and annoying. I am never calm or relaxed, always jittery. I drink no alcohol and gave up caffeine roughly 12 years ago so I can't blame that. I have a friend who will sometimes give me a few of her Ativan and I'll occasionally take one just to feel normal again.

    My doctor doesn't believe in "treating" menopause so I'm stuck like this. Back in the early years I tried the herbal remedies but was either allergic to them (I have a lot of plant allergies) or they were ineffective and useless.
  • lulalacroix
    lulalacroix Posts: 1,082 Member
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    VegjoyP wrote: »
    I want to comment but am afraid to share the things I have both seen, studied about and experienced due to the rigid mindsets of a lot of MFP users as well as society as a whole. I really just want to share without being argued with or harassed.

    However, I feel it is good to share anyway and want to only give information that is worth the effort.

    There are several things that I do not eat anymore that made a world of difference. The biggest is dairy. Cheese, milk, yogurt. I also gave up poultry and meat and am plant based. I also added some things that also made a world of difference. Dark leafy greens, non-GMO tofu, tempeh, nuts, seeds and lots of vegetables.
    Exercise. Weight training or any resistance exercise is crucial now more than ever. Cardiovascular as well. We are in the stage that bone, muscle and strength loss as well as heart health should be top priority.
    Happiness- positive mindset is also vitally helpful.

    I went through it already. I am 50.


    I agree that this can be a divisive topic. I became plant based 3.5 years ago. When I dropped the dairy it was amazing for me. I stopped getting migraines that had plagued me since a teen and my skin became so much nicer. This is obviously an anecdote and I'm not saying this would happen for everyone.

    Also being plant based in general gave me so much energy, it was just amazing. I obviously eat a lot of carbs and lost 10s of pounds eating this way. I also gained weight eating this way. Calories always matter.

    The one thing I cannot say is that being plant based affected my menopause symptoms. My hot flashes were hell before and hell after. I've recently stopped consuming caffeine as an experiment and my hot flashes seem to be less severe. Maybe, for me, alcohol and caffeine were the two things that have made a big difference.

    Seems that we all do have things that help or things that make symptoms worse.
  • ythannah
    ythannah Posts: 4,368 Member
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    Here's another little tidbit. My friend tells me her (stoic German still very physically active) mother, who is in her late 80s now, has never been able to stop taking whatever herbal supplement she takes (might be black cohosh) because if she does her hot flashes will resume.

    I can't imagine another 30 years of this.
  • AnnPT77
    AnnPT77 Posts: 32,738 Member
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    ythannah wrote: »
    Here's another little tidbit. My friend tells me her (stoic German still very physically active) mother, who is in her late 80s now, has never been able to stop taking whatever herbal supplement she takes (might be black cohosh) because if she does her hot flashes will resume.

    I can't imagine another 30 years of this.

    FWIW, my hot flashes subsided gradually over time, while doing nothing explicit to cause that. (I've been in menopause for over 20 years now.)

    Like many people with my health history, I took anti-estrogen drugs (a couple types, total of 7.5 years). Those tend to cause worse flashes and other menopausal symptoms, for most people. Even then - based on many conversations in my support group - most (not all) women on those drugs experience reductions in hot flashes with time, even while still taking the drugs. I've been off the drugs for a long time, still have the occasional hot flash (not anything I had before menopause), but it's really quite rare.

    Based on that, it seems like 30 years of consistent hot flashes wouldn't be the statistically most probable experience, but I'm guessing. I wonder if going off the herbal supplement destabilizes a steady state, but symptoms would decline if she didn't go back on it?

    Personally, I never took black cohosh (or other phytoestrogens) during the more acute hot flashes (or other symptoms) phase, because back then it was unclear whether phytoestrogens would feed growth of estrogen-receptor-positive breast cancer cells, or not. At this point, after more research, the answer seem to be "not". HRT of any type is completely out of the question for me, though.