Dating a guy who doesn’t workout…

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Replies

  • Peachesnstuff
    Peachesnstuff Posts: 1,261 Member
    I am hoping she swept him off his feet

    😂
  • glassyo
    glassyo Posts: 7,757 Member
    I am hoping she swept him off his feet

    With the whole breakdancing move?

    (Look, I just finished Thor: Love and Thunder. Marvel fight scenes DO something to and for me. :))
  • Tigg_er
    Tigg_er Posts: 22,001 Member
    nossmf wrote: »
    When I was single, I swore I would never DATE a smoker, let alone marry one. She couldn't sleep if somebody nearby was snoring.

    Twenty years of marriage later, my wife still smokes, and I still snore.

    True Love !!
  • Jthanmyfitnesspal
    Jthanmyfitnesspal Posts: 3,522 Member
    OK, this is the most intriguing thread in a long time. I can't wait to hear what happened!

    Advice: Don't put the cart before the horse. Texting is a good first step; video chatting is a good next step; but you'll learn things in-person that you never would otherwise. Workout habits are pretty far down the compatibility list, I bet. Keep the first meeting short and have it early in the day (coffee, not dinner).

    My qualifications: I've been trying hard to support my now-single family member with her (mostly online) dating over the past year or more. It is clearly very easy to get a bit over-excited from an initial online contact and I don't blame any single person for doing so. While many of her female friends advise her to "just go for it," I advise that she find a way to keep her cool and move slowly. Get multiple irons in the fire. Do some "in-person mixed-sex social activities," if you can. (Man, the fact that you have to call them "in-person mixed-sex social activities" demonstrates how separated we've become. The internet is both enabling us and killing us!) Don't jump to post anything about your dates to social media. (Posting here is fine, we don't know who the heck you are!)
  • xxzenabxx
    xxzenabxx Posts: 948 Member
    edited November 2022
    I haven't been in the forums for about a year, maybe more. This is the first thread I see. If you have certain boundaries around what you want in a partner, then that's fine, but it isn't ok to expect someone to suddenly change their whole life to fit with what you want. It's important to share core values, and working out is obviously one of yours, so find a guy who aligns with that. Looks, youth, strength - take it from someone who's lived 3 lives in the last decade - these things are transient. You can't rely on them. One day you might get crippling depression and gain a ton of weight. You might lose your muscle and have to wear your stretchy jeans as your everyday jeans. What you want in those moments is not a man who can bench press you into the sun but a man who will love you even when you may be difficult to love. You want a man who makes you laugh when you're at your lowest, who can empathise, reflect, take accountability, send you videos of ducklings riding on dogs backs because he knows it'll make you smile. Sure, attraction is a carnal and unexplainable thing. It's important you want to jump his bones too. But try and look a little deeper than warm hands. Thank you for coming to my Ted talk.

    I guess I just wanted someone on the same wavelength as me. I’m 29 and a typical millennial in the sense that we need to share common interests in order for the relationship to work. We’re not like the older generations unfortunately. I don’t know how my generation ended up like this but it seems pretty ingrained in us now. But I so appreciate the TED talk! Also I’ve suffered from depression and weight gain too so it’s not like I don’t have empathy. Just wanted to share the same passion for health and fitness I guess.

  • ElMeroKeeQue
    ElMeroKeeQue Posts: 546 Member
    xxzenabxx wrote: »
    Hey everyone! Sorry for the late update….so it didn’t go well in the end unfortunately. Turns out he just wanted to marry me for his visa and I ended up getting my brother involved too. My brother was pissed off with this guy. Now it explains why he was being so sweet and charming. This also explains why he kept mentioning marriage and I do want marriage but not so suddenly. He wanted to marry me in December 2022! I would want to get to know the guy properly before committing to marriage. So yeah, he didn’t do any exercise and he was also after my passport 😐 not good. I’m definitely going to be more careful when it comes to online dating.
    I do apologise if anyone was expecting an amazing love story but unfortunately that didn’t happen.

    Wow. Dodged a bullet there!
  • glassyo
    glassyo Posts: 7,757 Member
    edited November 2022
    xxzenabxx wrote: »
    Hey everyone! Sorry for the late update….so it didn’t go well in the end unfortunately. Turns out he just wanted to marry me for his visa and I ended up getting my brother involved too. My brother was pissed off with this guy. Now it explains why he was being so sweet and charming. This also explains why he kept mentioning marriage and I do want marriage but not so suddenly. He wanted to marry me in December 2022! I would want to get to know the guy properly before committing to marriage. So yeah, he didn’t do any exercise and he was also after my passport 😐 not good. I’m definitely going to be more careful when it comes to online dating.
    I do apologise if anyone was expecting an amazing love story but unfortunately that didn’t happen.

    I was expecting you not to end up dead in a ditch so thank you for not disappointing! :)

    Sorry about the illegal alien. You have to kiss a lot of frogs and all that...

    Did your brother, at least, do the break dancing move to bring him to his knees? :)
  • xxzenabxx
    xxzenabxx Posts: 948 Member
    glassyo wrote: »
    xxzenabxx wrote: »
    Hey everyone! Sorry for the late update….so it didn’t go well in the end unfortunately. Turns out he just wanted to marry me for his visa and I ended up getting my brother involved too. My brother was pissed off with this guy. Now it explains why he was being so sweet and charming. This also explains why he kept mentioning marriage and I do want marriage but not so suddenly. He wanted to marry me in December 2022! I would want to get to know the guy properly before committing to marriage. So yeah, he didn’t do any exercise and he was also after my passport 😐 not good. I’m definitely going to be more careful when it comes to online dating.
    I do apologise if anyone was expecting an amazing love story but unfortunately that didn’t happen.

    I was expecting you not to end up dead in a ditch so thank you for not disappointing! :)

    Sorry about the illegal alien. You have to kiss a lot of frogs and all that...

    Did your brother, at least, do the break dancing move to bring him to his knees? :)

    Lol haha I’m glad I didn’t disappoint then!

    Nope those frogs can stay away from me…I just want my Prince Charming ☺️

    Well if I gave my brother any more opportunities then I’m sure he would’ve but he kept himself pretty tame and it was all verbal from him!