its dumb but im scared to tell my boyfriend im dieting????

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I have no idea why!?
he is out of town for probobly the next month and only comes home on the weekends..Ive dieted in the past (before i was with him) and was well good at it i guess and i lost alot of weight and i am going to do it again but im not sure how to tell him..i need to though because he likes to go out to eat and i always have a hard time with ordering a salad at a restaurant..i would rather make somthing at home and not spend however much for a salad!! but anyhoot how can i be ok with telling him and have him be there to support and motivate me?? i think im almost embarrassed about it..im not sure why i am having a hard time with this..

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  • reese1206
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    Instead of looking at it as a "Diet".....Make a lifestyle change. Diets end but when you change to eating healthy and exercising....it's something you do throughout your life. I would just tell him your making these permanent changes in your life and need help. Tell him that you would prefer to cook meals at home. There are TONS of delicious and healthy recipes out there.
  • deanadimples
    deanadimples Posts: 419 Member
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    I didn't tell mine right away...probably a month or so. I'm not sure why. I guess maybe because if I failed I didn't have to admit it!

    He's also a total foodie that eats garbage for every meal...as in literally eats out/fast food EVERY meal and never gains. He just "doesn't get" what it's like for some of us.

    I had him pick up Supreme 90 for me from the store a month later so he knew after that. Now he's telling everyone how I'm getting fit and losing weight. But in the beginning....I didn't tell anyone. It was my private journey at first.
  • ruthie3110
    ruthie3110 Posts: 160 Member
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    Mine knows, but only because I've dragged him along to exercise with me.
  • DannyMussels
    DannyMussels Posts: 1,842 Member
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    Instead of looking at it as a "Diet".....Make a lifestyle change. Diets end but when you change to eating healthy and exercising....it's something you do throughout your life. I would just tell him your making these permanent changes in your life and need help. Tell him that you would prefer to cook meals at home. There are TONS of delicious and healthy recipes out there.

    These girls are too quick.

    I was gonna say this. 'Diet' always sounds bad, negative and brings about crummy feelings.

    Stress you wanna live healthier and make better choices.

    On the plus side, mention you could save money (on eating out) , learn some new things, and spend some more time togther. Setting aside a night to cook a new kinda meal is a pretty fun way to spend an evening. Maybe it'll bring you two closer and strengthen the relationship.

    :drinker:
  • DannyMussels
    DannyMussels Posts: 1,842 Member
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    Also, you shouldn't play on the tracks.
  • midnightbirch
    midnightbirch Posts: 19 Member
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    The moment I realized diet as a four-letter word things improved. I was brought up in a household that third and fourths were expected at a meal. My mother did not eat well (otherwise a wonderful woman) but she lost her life to sarcoidosis(kidney failure) She drank to much diet cola and ate what she wanted. She ended up with diabetes.I was around Pennsylvania Dutch,Italians, Cajuns,Mexicans, and many other people that cooked fat laden foods. I lived next door to eight different fast food restaurants and tried them all daily. The gatherings I went to were smorgasboards from all over the world. I desired to be a marine biologist but was told I was not college material so instead I worked various jobs around food and chemicalsand three years ago became a sales rep where food is everywhere.I was very active in sports and loved to hike and travel. But several tradgedies occured in a short period of time that I did not handle well. My health changed and I was not as active because of nagging allergies and diagnosed asthma.One day after marrying my wonderful wife she found a book called the Riverkeepers that made me think about why I felt so sick. I started looking into things out of curiosity,I stopped drinking soda (nine years now) Still not enough to change things. Then I stopped eating refined sugar,then saturated fat,then meat(I went back to lean meats) All the while dieting thinking this is the way but I kept not losing weight for any amountof time. Finally I realized I needed to change me and to set goals, to let go of stress and the old reels of film that kept me from being me. Now I am in College and have a 3.80 GPA and I don't live to eat. I eat healthy and avoid the splurges that lead back to addiction. I live life for life and not what others may see on the outside. Bottom line is I changed my lifestyle overeating and undereating are both signs of other problems that need resolving. Do this for yourself for your health for you and do it properly don't starve yourself of nutrients. Fast food is not food it is filler in the form of food. Good luck and enjoy life in health!
  • bcattoes
    bcattoes Posts: 17,299 Member
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    You don't have to make a big production about it. You could wait till he notices and just say you felt like you needed to start eating healthier and/or lose a few pounds. You don't have to order salad when you are out though. A small sirloin or filet mignon steak or chicken breast is usually pretty lean. Or grilled fish if they offer it. If it comes with sauce or cheese just order it without, and then a non-fried veggie for a side. These are my go to meals for eating out and they are usually not too high calorie.
  • NicCa90
    NicCa90 Posts: 37 Member
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    Just thought I'd let you all know I told him yesterday. He said he noticed my homepage was mfp and he was going to ask me what it was. I told him I had a goal to lose 20 by thanksgiving. He said that it's awesome for me but he doesn't think I need too. :) what a sweetie. I left it at that and now he knows so he Wont wonder why I'm eating alot different than him!!
  • mrivera713
    mrivera713 Posts: 232 Member
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    I didn't realize it until I read this post, but I'm kind of doing this solo as well. There are people around me who know what I'm doing, but It's mostly people who know about the pilot program at our bariatric center. Personally, I think it's because I thought I would fail. But I'm going to come out the closet too now... :) Thanks for this post! And congratulations on telling your boyfriend.
  • Wynterbourne
    Wynterbourne Posts: 2,222 Member
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    i need to though because he likes to go out to eat and i always have a hard time with ordering a salad at a restaurant.

    You might want to check out the webpages of some of those restaurants if you haven't already (And if they have one). Many times I've found that the salad is not the lowest calorie/healthiest item on the menu.