You should have seen the "dagger eyes" I got from my little

Tracyrocksss
Tracyrocksss Posts: 45
this morning when I told him that we were finished
"eating whatever we want" and that "Mommy and Benton are going to start eating healthier because it's the right thing to do".......I explained that instead of sugar cereal in the morning that he may sometimes have a no sugar cereal and a half a banana......He looked at me as if I had grown antennas, and then as if I had said the most hateful thing to him EVER!! He replied that he "doesn't like all bananas" and that he "likes froot Loops"
sigh.........I told him that we need to change the way both of us eat and that is going to mean that sometimes we might have to eat things we are not in the mood for, or things we aren't crazy about.............He, again, looked at me as if he had lost his best friend.....And I have to say it made me so sad.....Because I know *****I******* helped to create "the monster" that is poor eating habits...:( And I just realized that, when I was younger, starting a new regimen and sticking with it was just about ME......NOW I have an 8 year old boy who needs to get on the right foot as well and it is just going to be a real challenge trying to get him to eat the right things/portions/etc. and not appear like a hateful, withholding, mean mama!! and- I KNOWWW that is not the case at ALLLLLL!! But it is just going to be a real ride trying to make him understand that....Wish me luck in being Mama of the year AND trying to get my OWN "annoying, complaining, whiny inner voice" to understand that just because it is hard/inconvenient, does not mean I can't be successful!!!

Replies

  • auticus
    auticus Posts: 1,051 Member
    But that's what parenting is all about. Doing right by your kids, not letting them do whatever they want even if they think you are being mean by depriving them of their sugar-toxin. I wish that as a kid I had had better education about food.

    At 19 in the army I was drinking a case of coke on the weekend because I didn't know you could get fat off of it because it was just a drink. Fast forward a few years and getting close to 300 lbs and having diabetes....

    I'd of rather had a mean mom instructing me lol.
  • treehugginpam
    treehugginpam Posts: 1,129 Member
    Don't worry, little kids can be easy to trick into eating good things. :wink: You can even make the switch to similar but healthy cereals....I eat a cereal called "Fruitful O's" by Cascadian Farms that is basically Fruit Loops except it's made with real fruit juice concentrate instead of high fructose corn syrup, and they use organic ingredients. It tastes better than Fruit Loops! I just buy it in my regular grocery store in the "natural and organic" section.

    Stick to your guns; you're doing the right thing! You might be surprised that he'll like the organic stuff just as much.
  • drvvork
    drvvork Posts: 1,162
    Oh - my heart goes out to you in your attempt to change his eating habits. It's going to be a struggle at first but it sounds like you have communication with your child. Maybe offer him a bowl of grapes with wheat toast in the morning instead of his fruit loops or some cantelope since he is looking for his bowl of sweet. Just a suggestion.:flowerforyou:
  • Kelly_Wilson1990
    Kelly_Wilson1990 Posts: 3,245 Member
    You are doing the right thing. You are a good mama for wanting your child to be healthy. He will get over it and thank you some day.
  • AdAstra47
    AdAstra47 Posts: 823 Member
    Honestly, I've found that eating healthier is *more* enjoyable. Instead of getting flavor from processed sugar or from high-carb sauces, I use different combinations of fruits and spices, and I've found that food is more flavorful and I enjoy eating more! So maybe if you approach it that way: instead of "we're going to give up something we like," it's "we're going to find things that are good for our bodies, things that we might like even more than what we're eating now!" Make it a journey of discovery, not of sacrifice & pain. With little ones, sometimes it's just about the attitude, and they'll follow your lead.

    Easier said than done, I know... but kudos for making the effort to eat healthier, for you and for him, it will be worth it. Good luck to you!
  • bcattoes
    bcattoes Posts: 17,299 Member
    I think this is great !! I see posts all the time on here that say "I have to cook healthy food for me, but still cook unhealthy food because I have kids" and I can't understand it. Once you realize what junk food does to your body it's natural to not want to do that to your child.

    Just take it slow and don't rock his world so that he gets turned off. Adding healthy foods doesn't mean you have mention it every time. Maybe whole grain cereal that still has a bit too much sugar at first, then work towards less sugar. Gradual changes might make it easier for him.

    Good luck with your diet changes!! You sound like a great mom.
  • LilChickPea
    LilChickPea Posts: 122 Member
    As long as you make eating healthier fun, your child will be on board. There are all kinds of recipes or ideas to jazz up those healthier things and make them more appealing. You're doing the best thing for your child and starting him young, because he will take these good eating habits with him into adulthood. Thumbs up for you!!!! :happy:
  • AdAstra47
    AdAstra47 Posts: 823 Member
    Oh, and as a former teacher, can I PLEASE beg you (and everyone here!) to feed your child some protein rather than sugars for breakfast? Nothing worse than kids coming in all hyped up on sugary cereal, then crashing & wanting to nap at their desks halfway through the morning. You can't get anything accomplished with the kids if they're too hungry or tired to concentrate. Your improvement of his eating habits will help not only his health, but his education as well!
  • Good luck - but I know you won't need it! You're doing the right thing by yourself and by your son!

    Remember that the first week or so may be hard, with complaining, tears and tantrums (probably more from you than him lol) but after that you will both get in a rhythm.

    My biggest tip is don't make a big deal out of it. Just serve up the healthier food options without any fuss or coaching and they quickly learn that if they don't eat it they'll be hungry. If he refuses to eat it, don't offer him alternatives. Just offer him the same thing when he complains he's hungry, or at least something else healthy and nutritious. It really won't take long for him to realise that feeling hungry is a whole lot worse than eating the healthy nutritious food in front of him. He'll also learn to love the taste - as you will too.

    (I must say having my daughter was great because it made me learn to cook healthy, nutritious meals. My downfall was the emotional binge-eating once she had gone to bed)

    Just remember that no matter how hard it is in the short term - in the long term he will thank you for it by being a healthy man who will live a long and happy life.

    Add me as a friend if you need some support!

    Also, just adding to what someone else has said - remember on the days it is getting hard and there are tantrums and you feel like giving in what it feels like to be an overweight adult. The health complications, the inner sadness, the social stigma, and remember that you don't want that for your son. You may feel guilty at times for making him upset, but remember that you should feel guiltier for making him unhealthy. (Guilt is a great motivator for us mums!)
  • Tough love, Baby! Stick to your guns. It will be hard at first but in the long run he will thank you!! Stay strong!! :heart:
  • dlaplume2
    dlaplume2 Posts: 1,658 Member
    Don't worry about it. He will come around. One thing I would say though is not to point it out. Just make the transition and wean him off the sugar cereals. Don't make him go cold turkey, and don't make a big production of it. Just buy the healthier stuff so he has healthier stuff to pick from.

    Funny thing about kids. They will eventually eat when they get hungry enough.
  • Easiest thing is to rid your home of all the foods that are unhealthy. Out of sight, out of mind. Then when he comes to breakfast and sees half a banana and some yogurt, an egg and a slice of toast, he will eat because there is nothing else there. It is easy to change habits and a child who can roll with it, grows into an adult who can too.

    Dagger eyes and I hate you's are all kids know to upset the ship. He does not mean it as you take it. He is just confused and does not see why things have to change. Change is a great thing, and he along with you will feel loads better by eating a good healthy breakfast, good lunches and awesome dinners. So as parents we always must do what is best for our children no matter how hard it is.
  • I will have to say from my own experience that, while in the beginning, it will be tough (I have a 5 year old little man myself), this is what I have kept in mind:

    First and foremost, I am the mom, he is my child. If he doesn't like what I fix, he can go hungry. Trust me, the kid is not starving. He's 5 years old, 47" tall, and 62 lbs. He is not fat, he is simply built like a mini-line backer. If he skips a meal (and, trust me, he likes to eat), it will make an impression on him.

    There will be tears. There will be anger. There will be frustration. For both of you. Expect it, brace yourself for it, because it's coming.

    Explain to him how and why being overweight and eating poorly affects him. Research it. I have a picture on my personal computer that gives all the negatives of being obese. Things like: Low self-esteem, diabetes, increased risk of heart attack and stroke, lower employment opportunity, etc...

    Then try to correlate it to something that is personal to him. With my son, I have correlated it to him learning how to read. It is HARD, BUT I also don't want him waking up when he's 25 and realizing that he can't read and he can't get a job and then having to fight it. Similar to me: I woke up at 31 and weighed myself. I looked at the BMI chart and not only was I obese, I was extremely obese. I don't want him to have to face this kind of fight 20-30 years from now when it's 10 times harder.

    These are my experiences. I'm sure you have been given a lot of advise to suffice, but this is where I am. Good luck.
  • About to do the same to my almost 2-yr old daughter, who's addicted to M&Ms and Doritos. She's going to have withdrawal symptoms I bet.... and it's my fault for not argueing with the wifey about introducing those foods to her too early! I'm guilty as hell due to the "silence is consent" rule!!

    Anyway, your son will be better off for it. I know it breaks your heart right now, but some time from now you'll look back at sticking to your guns and even HE will pat you on the back (while hugging you) for it! The Present is more powerful than either the Past or the Future. It's the decisions made right here, right now that make all the difference. The fear and frustration you feel now will transform into confidence (you'll conquor the world!) and energy if you stay the course you've chosen.

    I'll be rooting for you (and so will everyone else, by the looks of the posts here). You are not alone in this fight for Correct Nutrition. When my daughter sees commercials for junk foods, I'll be educating and guiding her through all the mass media causing people to be "nutritionally confused." Like subliminal messages: "Eat this because this 'important' person is eating it!" More junk food ads than healthy food ads are in our faces every waking minute all because of company monetary gain. Both friends and family will also put it in your face (free advertising for junk food companies).

    Unlike most people, you are very much aware that you're strong enough to make the choice.
  • WOW- I am stunned and so happy at the loving support and SO THOUGHFUL posts that everyone has posted here. What an amazing discovery I have made in finding you......Thanks SO MUCH!! I will read and REREAD ALL of these posts all weekend. Thank you so much for your vote of confidence and for your caring words! Did I say I love it here???xoxoxoxoxxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo
  • juleseybaby
    juleseybaby Posts: 712 Member
    I get those same dagger eyes.... and then the little spitfire goes and makes his own sandwich because I tell him we will not make him a special meal. He is existing on turkey, ham, bread, milk, and whatever juice I can get him to try (Mott's Medleys, V8 Fusions and Splash -- yeah - I know - the actual fruit would be better). We have had to introduce fiber supplements because (much like his dad) he will not eat any vegetables.

    And I helped create that little sugar monster too. :grumble:

    Sounds like with both have a rough road ahead - but sticking to it will be better for all. You are on the right path.
  • I am just glad to see I am not alone!!!! BEST of luck to ALL of us and if you know of any "tricks" or cool ways to make it all more appealing to little ones, feel FREEEEE to post or send links!xoxox
  • shawnscott5
    shawnscott5 Posts: 295 Member
    I have 5 children and they all went through the "lifestyle" change with me, and so did my husband. It was a bit of an adjustment, we no longer have sugar cereals either. I switched them to Honey Nut Cheerios, Honey Nut Chex a real treat is Maple and brown sugar mini wheats, the Multi Grain Cheerios are really good. I couldn't understand why my 5 year old twins were acting like kids on crack. Well that is exactly what is being fed to them 1st thing in the morning. I also did some research and found out that the dyes they put in the colored foods and drinks causes ADHD symptoms. Non of my children are ADHD, but they would react to it. I talked it over with their Doctor, and my twins seem to have an allergic reaction to the dyes.

    It was a bit of a struggle for about 2 weeks, and they got over it. I change up the snacks all the time, so some days they will have a piece of fruit, yogurt almost everyday or cheese and crackers. I only buy 100% juice, but you have to be careful with that also because alot of them have a ton of sugar. We have a rule in my home as far as water drinking. I bought each of us our own refillable water bottle that is 22 oz. They have to finish one of those or more a day, then they can have chocolate milk after dinner. They all are on the water kick.

    I am very happy that you are not only setting yourself up for success, but you are also doing that for your child. Keep it up, and he will be a very healthy adult. Congrats on your lifestyle change.
  • Toots! I LOVELOVELOVE the drink your water or no chockie milk ruleeeeeee!!!! That is VERY helpful and practical! Thanks for your post--we are good Mamas!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
  • Kcinnamon
    Kcinnamon Posts: 26 Member
    My daughter is ten, and when i started she had a problem, but I've found some really great homemade recipes that she loves. Crockpot cheeseburgers (search in the recipe section) is one of our favorites, and turkey or chicken nuggets, anything made at home is so much better than packaged stuff you buy in the store. I've even got her eating salad now cause i got the dole southwest salad kit, and she said it doesn't taste like salad at all. you just need to find some great alternatives. She wanted pop tarts, so i got her those 100 cal packs of pop tart crisps. I got her the yogurt that had the cookie crumbs to mix into it. We're so lucky there are so many low cal alternatives right now. Special K chips are great, and aunt millies Healthy white bread is only 100 cal for 2 slices. fat free hot dogs are 40 cal instead of 180. Just keep your eyes open in the store.

    Lot's of luck :-)
  • I want to encourage you to take the emotion out of this situation.

    I'm not saying to be a cold-blooded witch about the thing, but try not to feed into the drama or the potential for drama. Kids will generally not let themselves starve to death (unless there are some underlying issues. In which case, you'd need some other intervention), so they'll eventually eat what's being provided for them. He may balk at and initially refuse to eat salad and brown rice or whatever you put in front of him. But after a while, when no other choice is given, the dynamic will change.

    Hurt feelings, temper tantrums, resistance, refusal, all of those things may or MAY NOT happen. Either way, we as parents can't afford to get wrapped up in the up and down that comes with parenting through something uncomfortable. As long as you continue to be matter-of-fact about things, he'll learn some valuable lessons in self-discipline and maturity....not to mention healthy eating habits.
  • Kcinnnnn!! I LOVE your suggestionsss!!! THANK you!:)
  • oopsss- forgot to post to Leola!! ((Thanks, love)))---and while I appreciate your post, I have to say that I am already aware of every word and practice it daily at home AND in my career!!!!!lol- I teach 750 kids art every week and I totally LIVE by the rule that you have to compartmentalize emotions vs. "what you need to do to be successful"
    I guess my post was because I simply needed a pat on the back, or an encouraging word, or some "misery loves company" kind of thing--haaaaaaaaaaaa---- I KNOW what to do with my little man and I know how to get there...It's just not going to be "fun" you know what I mean!!????:(
  • I wasn't suggesting that you didn't know how to handle your son, and I hope you really didn't take my comment that way. I hope you weren't offended at all. What I was getting at was the pace of his adjustment to the transition will be set primarily by you and your commitment to do things differently, which I think is pretty much what everyone else on this thread was saying. In no way was I attempting to insult you or imply that you didn't have what it takes to ride out the opposition. I was also saying that there might not be as much opposition as perhaps expected. Sometimes, we as parents anticipate more of a storm than what actually takes place. So again, my post wasn't designed to discourage you. And forgive me if I came across that way.
  • Nnnnnnnoo!!Noy at all Miss Le!! I appreciated it and everything you wrote made sense and is very helpful
    I think you are going to be (or already have been!!??) a great source of support for me and a lot of people on here! And you know what--I especially like your thought that maybe the fight might not be as hard as I think it will be.....Just becuseI assuuuuuuuume he will be "sad" and have a difficult time adjusting sure doesn't make it so, huh!??xo
  • dad106
    dad106 Posts: 4,868 Member
    Another thing I would suggest so the transition isn't so crazy, so to do half and half.. like half healthy cereal and maybe a quarter of a sugar one. Gradually reduce the amount of sugary cereal and increase the amount of healthy cereal. That way he's still getting healthy and it's not such a shock to his system.

    Also, make it fun.. you can make ants on a log out of celery, peanut butter and raisins. If he's eating broccoli tell him he's eating little trees. Theres all sorts of ways to make healthy food fun and appetizing.

    As far as chocolate milk goes, my favorite thing to do(if you can afford this, not sure where the budget lies!) is to buy the little cartons of organic valley chocolate milk or horizon chocolate milk. You can buy a case of 12 which is like 15 dollars at whole foods, or buy just a few individual ones. The best part about that is once that 8 oz serving is gone, it's gone. He can't go pour more because its not in the house and it's not a glass.
  • Dad 106!! I LOVE that idea about the choco milk!!!! I need to do that for ME too! GREAT idea-- I could drink my weight in chockie milk...lol...
  • sarahliftsUP
    sarahliftsUP Posts: 752 Member
    Start him off early! I babysit a younger girl, and the things she eats is ridiculous.. she doesn't eat vegetables, even apples are gross. I think she likes bananas.. but I'm not too sure. She eats pizza pockets, ice cream, cookies, chips, etc. every time I am over there. She's addicted to junk food and she's only a child. Her taste buds are used to sweet, salty, over processed foods. I know kids are supposed to grow.. but in the past year she's gained 20 pounds.. she has a learning disability and I don't think her eating habits are helping her at all.
  • Hoppymom
    Hoppymom Posts: 1,158 Member
    I raised my own four and had a childcare for 11 years. During that time I was pretty healthy. Once every week or two I put a handful of sugared cereal in the bowl of healthy cereal. They had to eat all of the cereal not just the sweet ones. Also instead of syrup, which is essentialy liquid sugar we always used peanut butter on pancakes and waffles. One of the favorite treats was fresh spinach leaves with peanut butter spead on them, fold in half . They would eat tons of these, go figure. Once a month or so let him have a sweet treat. It won't take long for him to realize that it is REALLY sugary. Help him learn to read food labels and learn portion control. My husband of 35 years just ate a whole can of chicken soup and thought that it was one serving. I had to show him how to read it. People get heavy in part because they don't understand portion control because when we eat out the servings are 2-4 times a healthy single portion. It's awesome that you are taking this journey now rather than when he is older and can leave the house and eat what he wants. He'll learn as he sees how healthy you are becoming. YAY you!
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