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tomcustombuilder
Posts: 1,623 Member
So you have threads deleted on a weight loss forum because the poster didn’t want to hear that their lack of loss was due to not being in a caloric deficit.
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Um.. hugs?
Yeah, I know what you mean. I only ever had something deleted when mentioning that big p is not necessary.0 -
Don't know how it went down, but the OP can ask to have their thread taken down.2
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I’m sure that’s what happened then.snowflake954 wrote: »Don't know how it went down, but the OP can ask to have their thread taken down.
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tomcustombuilder wrote: »
I’m sure that’s what happened then.snowflake954 wrote: »Don't know how it went down, but the OP can ask to have their thread taken down.
It's hard because I know you try to give thoughtful answers, and it seems they're not appreciated. However, there are many "lurkers" that watch and never post. You may have helped someone else.6 -
I didn't see the final 9 posts or so, but I hadn't seen a mention of the number of calories she was eating, just that she didn't want to decrease her intake further.
I'd like to say though that I don't agree with this general idea you seem to have that we're all counting calories badly (some more than others), necessarily overestimating intake and overestimating exercise calories. That's not how you worded it precisely (obviously I can't check now) but that's the message I remember, with cutting calories further being the only solution when weight loss isn't happening. Errors in calorie counting can happen both ways, and in her situation (prolonged calorie deficit) a diet break or reverse dieting certainly were valid alternatives.4 -
My instincts tell me she was in a very low calorie deficit to lose weight that reducing them further was probably dangerously low, and didn't make any sense to her to lower them further. She seemed like she wanted help but left out the very information that was pertinent to the answer. I suspect it's a metabolic problem. When people lose big weight more than once like she did in the hundreds of lbs and possibly without proper nutrition, metabolism can be effected and studies of the "Big Losers" a decade on shows their metabolisms still haven't recovered. Cheers2
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On the flip side, metabolic ward studies have been done with people that say they can't lose weight in spite of their low calorie diets and pretty much all, or at least the studies I've seen show that when their actually fed the amount of calories they say they consumed and can't lose weight, they did lose weight. Cheers.5
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That OP said s/he was flagging the thread for deletion, which is a thing any of us can do to our own threads.
It happens.
I don't see the point of rehashing it here from limited memory of what was said, and . . . well, if I deleted a thread, I'd want it to stay deleted.
If someone's advice is so valuable that they don't want it to be deleted along with someone else's thread, maybe write an insightful OP, get it nominated for "Most Helpful Posts" status?7 -
Yeah... no.... maybe..... sure.... it is their right to delete their thread....
it is also my right to be frustrated that I wrote advice that may be relevant to other people and it also gets deleted when people delete "their thread"....
it is also my right not to bother to write advice if I am bothered enough by the fact that people can delete my advice by deleting their thread and yet I wrote it... so there's that too.
But it is also my right to gripe about it... or did I mention that already!?!?!
That said, less calories is a good answer but it is not always the best or only answer.10 -
Yeah... no.... maybe..... sure.... it is their right to delete their thread....
it is also my right to be frustrated that I wrote advice that may be relevant to other people and it also gets deleted when people delete "their thread"....
it is also my right not to bother to write advice if I am bothered enough by the fact that people can delete my advice by deleting their thread and yet I wrote it... so there's that too.
But it is also my right to gripe about it... or did I mention that already!?!?!
That said, less calories is a good answer but it is not always the best or only answer.
Yeah, we wasted our time. I also put some time into that thread. OP is not getting a bouquet of flowers from me over that, anytime soon, sure. I have a memory, kinda.
But complaining about deletion afterward? Mourning that it's lost to the world just puts more time into it. Bigger waste of time, IMO.
My advice is worth every penny a person pays for it, pretty much by definition. That they valued it accordingly shouldn't be any kind of a surprise. Them's the breaks.
YMMV.
P.S. All of this is subjective, but I'm feeling a bit of a gap between what I remember people saying on the thread (me included) and what they're presenting here as having been said by themselves or others. If that doesn't make it even more pointless . . . well, I don't know what would.4 -
no reason to be bothered. esp enough to create post over it. big fish small pond syndrome. lots of big fish in this little pond.3
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lol a microcosm of MFP… Go to Reddit if you want to argue.1
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What an odd thing to start a thread about.
No one is forced to be invested in these chats among strangers.2 -
What an odd thing to start a thread about.
No one is forced to be invested in these chats among strangers.
This is true. That's why I've mostly walked away from answering people's questions they post. Most of them don't want answers and we're just wasting our time. Honestly, most of the time I think we should just let this message board slowly fade away. It's just people asking the same questions over and over that don't really want answers, they just want someone to tell then that they're right.6 -
sollyn23l2 wrote: »What an odd thing to start a thread about.
No one is forced to be invested in these chats among strangers.
This is true. That's why I've mostly walked away from answering people's questions they post. Most of them don't want answers and we're just wasting our time. Honestly, most of the time I think we should just let this message board slowly fade away. It's just people asking the same questions over and over that don't really want answers, they just want someone to tell then that they're right.
Y’all are hilarious.
But agree with @sollyn23l2
I am so disheartened pouring time into responses for One-Day-Wonders who leave the same day they’ve registered, or who return every few months with the same issues, get the exact same advice, disregard (because, clearly their plan is working, right?), leave, rinse, repeat ad nauseam.
I get that it unfortunately comes with the territory.
All I can hope is that I can reach one person out there and encourage them to change their life by sharing how large weight loss affected me.
If it’s any comfort, many of y’all were directly responsible for giving me that gift.5 -
springlering62 wrote: »sollyn23l2 wrote: »What an odd thing to start a thread about.
No one is forced to be invested in these chats among strangers.
This is true. That's why I've mostly walked away from answering people's questions they post. Most of them don't want answers and we're just wasting our time. Honestly, most of the time I think we should just let this message board slowly fade away. It's just people asking the same questions over and over that don't really want answers, they just want someone to tell then that they're right.
Y’all are hilarious.
But agree with @sollyn23l2
I am so disheartened pouring time into responses for One-Day-Wonders who leave the same day they’ve registered, or who return every few months with the same issues, get the exact same advice, disregard (because, clearly their plan is working, right?), leave, rinse, repeat ad nauseam.
I get that it unfortunately comes with the territory.
All I can hope is that I can reach one person out there and encourage them to change their life by sharing how large weight loss affected me.
If it’s any comfort, many of y’all were directly responsible for giving me that gift.
Tru dat. Cheers.1 -
No idea which thread you're talking about - I only come on here every so often now as, similar to above, I'd had enough of reading the same questions over and over - but it's possible that I also commented (I know I've recently said that it's feasible that your calorie counting is out, if you're using data entries that have been in the database for some time but the product has changed in the meantime). Regardless, most of you commenting above were a huge help to me when I was losing weight / coping with having been diagnosed as diabetic / learning how to manage maintenance, so please do know that some of us learned from you.9
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Without these boards and the people who keep up answering, I would probably be morbidly obese by now. Although the first years I never dared to even ask a question, I was lurking and taking in every morsel of information I could. I got confused at some point (is low carb really the answer?), but by staying focused on all the solid facts that were presented by the “veterans”, I probably am as educated as can be in nutrition and I KNOW what to do to lose and maintain.
So yes, a massive THANK YOU to all of you who still take the time to respond. Even if the OP doesn’t post a second time, a lot of lurkers are being shown the right path! 💐12 -
Antiopelle wrote: »Without these boards and the people who keep up answering, I would probably be morbidly obese by now. Although the first years I never dared to even ask a question, I was lurking and taking in every morsel of information I could. I got confused at some point (is low carb really the answer?), but by staying focused on all the solid facts that were presented by the “veterans”, I probably am as educated as can be in nutrition and I KNOW what to do to lose and maintain.
So yes, a massive THANK YOU to all of you who still take the time to respond. Even if the OP doesn’t post a second time, a lot of lurkers are being shown the right path! 💐
Thanks for posting. THIS is what I always say----lurkers. It gets discouraging to keep answering the same questions over and over and try to educate an OP. It takes time to evolve weight loss and get the correct habits in place, but it's the only way to keep the weight off after reaching goal. Going against all the misinformation out there is not easy.
Thanks again. You'll make the day of several "vets" for sure.8
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