Struggling

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Here I am, starting this app once again. Been a user for the last 10 years or more, on and off. I cannot seem to stick with it. The "want to" is there....but the motivation isn't. I make excuses, and I allow other people and life changes to get me off track. I don't have much support from anyone and it's hard when you're the only one in your household that wants to eat right and exercise. Not sure I even want to try this again. Ugh. I absolutely HATE exercising. I recently spent $600 on a treadmill that I've only used maybe 4 times. I used to have a gym membership but then it got too expensive and too time consuming to go when things in my life would interfere. I need to get 30lbs off but I am not sure I can. I don't eat right, nor consistently. I'm either a very restrictive eater or a binge eater. On top of that, financially we've taken a hit due to the state of the economy so buying the necessary foods to lose weight is next to impossible. We're literally barely getting by each week with our household of 7. How do you all do it???? I admire those of you who struggled but then one day it clicked and you got it together and met those goals! I want to be that person too! Any advice?? I'm almost to the point of just giving up and being stuck with the weight I am. 🥺

Replies

  • daweezer
    daweezer Posts: 15 Member
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    Sganm1986- I am therewith you! I've spent a plethora of money over the years on m&m (machines & memberships)... I am dedicated for a few months.
    I also have very achy feet (use, I am old- but
    Participate in life 🙂) a whole ago I bought a pilates reformer (a home version) and will say- I like it a
    Lot.. But tend to ignore it eight here in my home!
    I went to violates studio a few months to remind myself how I liked it--- so now... Have found a bunch of free reformer videos on you tube!!
    I made appointment on my calendar for 2 times a
    Week.... Its called now for a couple
    Months.... I think having someone to be dedicated to would also be good... Perhaps we can prompt each other! I also am not good at “being a good eater” sometimes..:: I'm human too 🤗
  • daweezer
    daweezer Posts: 15 Member
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    Well.... I hope you can interpret my typos!
    Not too good at texting well
    😳😖
  • herblovinmom
    herblovinmom Posts: 354 Member
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    @sgann1986 Welcome back! I think for a lot of us the difference is we keep trying, we don’t give up, if something knocks me off plan, I’m getting right back to it the next meal or the next day, I’m only human,… I make unhealthy choices sometimes but that’s not the end all be all. too much restriction makes you feel like your not enjoying life, and then you end up binging. Try different exercises . You might find one or two that you like and do those for stress relief and long term health not for weight loss. When your mindset is set to weight loss then as soon as you no longer want/need to lose weight or no longer care because you got knocked off plan then it’s really easy to revert back to old habits that weren’t beneficial for us in the longterm. Find a lifestyle that you can live with that allows healthy choices, healthy food choices, activity choices that you actually like. You don’t need to create the deficit by exercising that just usually helps, you can lose weight with diet changes alone. Add in exercise later if that’s what you want. Try temptation bundling. It’s where you do something you enjoy while doing something less enjoyable. It gets you thru the task. And if you do it enough times you might create a new habit. You just gotta keep going. Motivation ebbs and flows. I never forget why I started this journey. Find your why and remind yourself often. Everyone has different reasons for starting this journey. If consistency is an issue maybe make small achievable goals, that you can feel good about completing, they may seem tiny in the grand scheme of things but rewarding yourself for a job well done will create new pleasure pathways in your brain not centered around your old habits. I’m not sure what your goals are but an example would be, log all my meals for the week, if a week is too long then aim for a few days, then give a small reward for your efforts, like something you’d already do, maybe movie night in… etc… you get the idea..
    consistency can appear consistent over a larger time period. I always like to say I’m consistently inconsistent 😉
  • csplatt
    csplatt Posts: 1,021 Member
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    The good news is we don’t need motivation. We need discipline. What if you let go of wanting to be motivated and instead decided “I want to be the kind of person who is disciplined?”
  • ninerbuff
    ninerbuff Posts: 48,529 Member
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    sgann1986 wrote: »
    Here I am, starting this app once again. Been a user for the last 10 years or more, on and off. I cannot seem to stick with it. The "want to" is there....but the motivation isn't. I make excuses, and I allow other people and life changes to get me off track. I don't have much support from anyone and it's hard when you're the only one in your household that wants to eat right and exercise. Not sure I even want to try this again. Ugh. I absolutely HATE exercising. I recently spent $600 on a treadmill that I've only used maybe 4 times. I used to have a gym membership but then it got too expensive and too time consuming to go when things in my life would interfere. I need to get 30lbs off but I am not sure I can. I don't eat right, nor consistently. I'm either a very restrictive eater or a binge eater. On top of that, financially we've taken a hit due to the state of the economy so buying the necessary foods to lose weight is next to impossible. We're literally barely getting by each week with our household of 7. How do you all do it???? I admire those of you who struggled but then one day it clicked and you got it together and met those goals! I want to be that person too! Any advice?? I'm almost to the point of just giving up and being stuck with the weight I am. 🥺
    Honestly, you just have to be consistent eating calories as the most important factor. But again, YOU have to really want to do it. I ask people all the "what is it gonna take?" Will it have to be a health issue to finally get you to do it? That's a question you'll have to decide for yourself. What I DO KNOW is the longer you take to do it, the harder it is to get it done because habitual behavior will keep you in a pattern. If the habitual behavior is that of inconsistency, then it keeps continuing longer. It's not motivation you need (think of brushing your teeth here, where you need no motivation, but do it out of behavior), but consistent habitual change.

    A.C.E. Certified Personal and Group Fitness Trainer
    IDEA Fitness member
    Kickboxing Certified Instructor
    Been in fitness for 35 years and have studied kinesiology and nutrition

    9285851.png


  • pony4us
    pony4us Posts: 125 Member
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    Well..I agree only you can make the changes and if you are just getting by maybe sell the $600 treadmill if you are not using it. What will it take? Maybe a health crisis with the added expense of medical bills for you or your family of seven who don't watch their health.
    I'm sorry if this sounds harsh and I do hope that you find a way for success but the truth is at some point something will flip a swith for you to take control.
  • Guthealthfirst
    Guthealthfirst Posts: 8 Member
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    It’s good that you are self-aware and know what it is you desire and your barriers to achieving that desire. The problem is (this is with me as well), you need to act on your desire. if not, whatever you desire will be wishful thinking unless action is applied. How to apply action?

    Create and build a mindset for success first. Adopt a all or nothing attitude when it comes to losing weight and becoming healthier. Don’t stay in the middle which will allow you to sabotage, slack, and not put the work in.

    What are some of the things you can act on a daily basis that will provide you results, albeit incrementally?
    Portion control, fasting, taking the stairs instead of elevator, becoming more active, start small and do this everyday.
  • MaggieGirl135
    MaggieGirl135 Posts: 977 Member
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    I suggest just two small steps: One, just log your food, whatever it is, healthy or not. Two, just walk 5 min every day on your treadmill. Try that for a week and re-evaluate what changes in your routine you are willing to make.
  • refactored
    refactored Posts: 399 Member
    edited June 2023
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    I agree with @MaggieGirl135. Start by building small habits. As small as you can make them. If counting for a whole day is too much then just try one meal but try to do it consistently each day. If getting on the treadmill for 5 minutes is too much, try just putting your shoes on and walking over to the treadmill. The idea is to start with something easy then build from there. This video explains the idea in a bit more detail.

    https://youtu.be/1gdkBt9it84
  • 69rjtpstcd
    69rjtpstcd Posts: 5 Member
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    @csplatt While I agree with you somewhat, I feel like it’s tough to draw a line between motivation and discipline. You need some amount of motivation to want to be disciplined. You’re not going to put everything into a goal that doesn’t mean all that much to you.
  • donidaily
    donidaily Posts: 825 Member
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    @sgann1986 Well done for coming back and asking for help! I am also a repeat MFP-er and hoping to lost around 30lb. I love @MaggieGirl135's advice about...just starting. Log everything without setting a bunch of ruled and expectations for yourself. Then build slowly.

    I started (AGAIN) in June and I keep this regular thread going where I check in with my efforts and struggles. I'd love your company there if it could be useful!
  • amberchecker
    amberchecker Posts: 22 Member
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    refactored wrote: »
    I agree with @MaggieGirl135. Start by building small habits. As small as you can make them. If counting for a whole day is too much then just try one meal but try to do it consistently each day. If getting on the treadmill for 5 minutes is too much, try just putting your shoes on and walking over to the treadmill. The idea is to start with something easy then build from there. This video explains the idea in a bit more detail.

    https://youtu.be/1gdkBt9it84

    I’ll eco this. Start small and keep on building. Trying to do too much at once will become very overwhelming and burn you out.