Did you get enough to eat at your goal weight, or did your food allowance make you grumpy?

Did you have to readjust your goal weight to be happy?

I hear about former models and slim people never feeling happy because they were hungry all the time, but I wonder if it's because they didn't burn off enough calories to eat more or if their muscle tone was too low (sorry, I hope that makes sense!). I see people on here with really nice figures and they seem to eat plenty and have happy lives.

Were you at a point where you were like, screw it, I need to gain weight and eat more so I'm not grumpy or tired all the time? can you look good and still eat enough?
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Replies

  • pony4us
    pony4us Posts: 161 Member
    I'm in my 70s and have always maintained around 5 lbs "overweight" I recently asked my doctor if I should try to lose those few pounds and was met with a strong NO!!! At my age and height I maintain at 1400 cal with maybe 100 more for walking. When I was losing I ate at this goal calories instead of dropping lower and then having to transition into maintenance. I am healthy, active, on no meds, have super bone scans. It's all good. Like others I do have a red line of weight, but then would just go back to weighing and measuring my food.
  • spiriteagle99
    spiriteagle99 Posts: 3,743 Member
    I have been maintaining between 120-125 for about 9-10 years. Ten years ago, I increased my daily exercise, which allows me to eat pretty much whatever I want, though not necessarily as much as I would like. (e.g. I eat two cookies for dessert, not 5.) I enjoy exercise, and need it for my mental health, so have no problem doing an hour or more of exercise every day. I'm retired, so time isn't an issue. At one point when I was marathon training my weight got a bit too low (118) so I decided to increase my calories so I wouldn't be quite as boney. In the past few years, I've cut back on my running a bit and have put on a couple of pounds. I am still within my goal range, so I'm fine with that. If I gained 10 lbs. I would still be within a healthy weight, I am just happier at my current size.
  • SafariGalNYC
    SafariGalNYC Posts: 1,461 Member
    In maintenance I’ve always felt like I have had enough food.

    I tend to fill up on low cal volume foods though. I can eat a whole head of cauliflower for 150 calories which is hard to do because it’s so filling.. where as a whole bag of potato chips I can keep going…

    1800 calories for example - can be a lot of food!

    Typical maintenance day:

    Breakfast:
    Veggie and fruit smoothie with added protein
    Omelettewith greens

    Lunch:
    Fish
    Greens

    Snack

    Dinner:
    Vegetable
    Poultry
    Fruit


  • herringboxes
    herringboxes Posts: 259 Member
    In a few weeks, I will have more control over what I eat (currently prepare food with the needs of my teen in mind) and will play around with macros. I wonder if more fat and/or protein will help.
  • sollyn23l2
    sollyn23l2 Posts: 1,755 Member
    In a few weeks, I will have more control over what I eat (currently prepare food with the needs of my teen in mind) and will play around with macros. I wonder if more fat and/or protein will help.

    That's awesome. I think more protein might help, for sure.
  • cmriverside
    cmriverside Posts: 34,416 Member
    edited August 2023
    When I first arrived at Maintenance it was difficult. I was always hungry and I gained weight easily. So I'd say, yeah, it was hard. At first. I was trying to stay at XXXX calories and it just was never enough.

    It took me a good year at maintenance for that to settle down. Not sure how or why, it was 16 years ago and I don't really remember other than 1. More vegetables 2. Less wheat and sugar. Both those things are important even today.

    I do eat 300-600 calories MORE per day than myfitnesspal recommends, so I am not usually struggling, but I have to watch it, and at least one day per week I have a major over-age of 1000-1500ish extra calories...and that's above the 2000-2300 I eat every day.
  • westrich20940
    westrich20940 Posts: 920 Member
    My 'goal weight' was simply to not be 'obese' according to my BMI (even though I know that BMI isn't a great metric for overall health). But - my weight gain was basically directly related to my activity level...which was highly affected by a time period of my life where I was dealing with some moderate/severe depression. So basically I had been a runner/active my whole life and generally fit/petite. Even through college. I did gain some weight in college but I was still 'thin'. But if I became sad/unmotivated I'd basically be completed sedentary. I have a desk job and then would go home and eat (whatever sounded tasty, and a lot of it) and then lay down in bed until I fell asleep...wake up the next day and do it all over again.

    So, once I basically recognized the state I was in...my first focus was to get back to 'myself'...which includes the activities that I was neglecting. I got back into running -- which covid kind of sparked that as well. I knew things were going to be shutting down and I didn't want to be stuck inside all the time so basically as long as the weather allowed I went on a hike or walk. Slowly after building up some fitness I started interval running and the back to running. Through that process I built a closer/better relationship with my body...so now really if my body tells me it's hungry, I eat. But after logging food and activity for the amount of time I did - I basically know what most of the meals I'm eating contain and also what I burn with activity and what my general caloric needs are. I've maintained +/- 5lbs now for over 2 years without logging consistently. Maybe over the holidays the swing is more than 5lbs but I'm not fussed about that bc I know when there are no longer holiday parties and goodies, it'll go back to normal.

    I think it's important to be honest - and know that when getting to the point of maintenance after being in a deficit can be a change and can come with some weight gain. However, as you approach your goal weight, you should be lowering your calorie deficit and getting closer to eating at maintenance anyway to avoid that abrupt change. But ultimately - if maintenance still feels like or requires calorie restriction...it may be a possibility that the goal weigh achieved is too low.

    My original goal weight was 135 (I'm female and 5'3")... I got to that and was still progressing in my running and then continued to lose more weight. I figured, oh ok another few pounds would be nice...but also I didn't recalculate my overall maintenance calories so what was my maintenance level prior to become more active and physically fit was a bit lower than what it became...so I continued to lose weight unintentionally. I got down to ~115lbs (under 120 at least) and was there for about 6 weeks...but that's how long it seemed to take me to process that and ultimately purposefully eat more and gain back up to ~125 which is where I tend to stay consistent.

    Currently with my activity level...I do not believe that I could comfortably sustain 115lbs even if I'd liked what I looked like then (which I ultimately didn't, I felt it was too thin for me, even though it's within the 'healthy weight range') without having to go back into a deficit or feeling hungry.

    So if you get to a 'goal weight' and even eating maintenance still leaves you 'hungry' or you slowly slowly creep up in weight....it's likely that the goal weight is too low. Each of our bodies has a sort of set point/equilibrium...and while YOU may want it to be _______ (fill in the blank with a number on the scale), that might not be appropriate.
  • ddsb1111
    ddsb1111 Posts: 871 Member
    I was the one above who said maintenance was feeling exactly like calorie deficit. I wanted to update in case my post discouraged anyone.

    At the time I wrote that, I was about 7 weeks into maintenance, and right now is 4 weeks later. I had kept the same weight over the 7 week period. During deficit, I never would swing around in weight, half a pound up at most and usually just holding steady, and then the drop would show up every week or so. After 7 weeks, in maintenance, I was just holding steady week after week.

    But after that I dropped a little more all at once - a pound I think. Ok, I just let it be and figured I could consider it in my range. Then another pound came off maybe two weeks later. Well now another pound two weeks after that, so clearly I need to eat a bit more.

    If it’s a pound every two weeks, I can assume I have a 250 cal daily deficit on average (and I do eat consistently, don’t go out to eat). I also lately have not felt deprived (though I do feel like I eat quite lightly).

    Maintainance is tough. And I realize I have nothing to complain about, scale keeps going down not up, but it’s not easy for me to make this transition. It’s still going. My new plan is to incorporate a snack to fuel my lifting days, which I do need, and see how that goes.

    This post has been incredibly helpful for me as I’m about to go through the same thing. I appreciate your insight and hope you continue to post and update. We put in so much hard work to reach a goal weight and it’s an uneasy feeling not knowing where your new maintenance might be, especially with the usual monthly hormonal changes.
  • AnnPT77
    AnnPT77 Posts: 34,203 Member
    ddsb1111 wrote: »
    I was the one above who said maintenance was feeling exactly like calorie deficit. I wanted to update in case my post discouraged anyone.

    At the time I wrote that, I was about 7 weeks into maintenance, and right now is 4 weeks later. I had kept the same weight over the 7 week period. During deficit, I never would swing around in weight, half a pound up at most and usually just holding steady, and then the drop would show up every week or so. After 7 weeks, in maintenance, I was just holding steady week after week.

    But after that I dropped a little more all at once - a pound I think. Ok, I just let it be and figured I could consider it in my range. Then another pound came off maybe two weeks later. Well now another pound two weeks after that, so clearly I need to eat a bit more.

    If it’s a pound every two weeks, I can assume I have a 250 cal daily deficit on average (and I do eat consistently, don’t go out to eat). I also lately have not felt deprived (though I do feel like I eat quite lightly).

    Maintainance is tough. And I realize I have nothing to complain about, scale keeps going down not up, but it’s not easy for me to make this transition. It’s still going. My new plan is to incorporate a snack to fuel my lifting days, which I do need, and see how that goes.

    This post has been incredibly helpful for me as I’m about to go through the same thing. I appreciate your insight and hope you continue to post and update. We put in so much hard work to reach a goal weight and it’s an uneasy feeling not knowing where your new maintenance might be, especially with the usual monthly hormonal changes.

    I totally understand nervousness about that - I had some myself. It will dissipate.

    I think we feel like maintenance weight is a really, really fragile thing: That our weight will blow up with the slightest mistakes. (I'm not saying our rational brain thinks that. ;) )

    In reality, if your eating and activity behavior is even remotely consistent, nothing dramatic is going to happen. If you keep monitoring body weight (or clothes fit, or similar), you will notice changes. By now, you know not to over-react to tiny or temporary changes that aren't explained by changes in eating/activity. Things don't feel OK at first, but high odds they'll actually be OK.

    As time went on in maintenance, those ideas became viscerally more real and true to me. I hope and believe that you'll find the same thing: That your confidence will grow with the first weeks/months of success.

    If you don't completely stop monitoring and behaving sensibly, the only negative thing that realistically could happen is a slow up-creep of weight, like a pound a month-ish. If you're monitoring, you'll notice; and you know how to re-lose a pound if necessary.
  • ddsb1111
    ddsb1111 Posts: 871 Member
    It’s about 4 weeks later, and I think this will be my last update on this.

    I weigh myself daily. Fluctuations upwards do not upset me (and I don’t fluctuate much anyway), but I realized I was subconsciously reducing my intake when the scale went up. (I do not calorie count).

    So it seems this is how I was actually in a deficit while thinking I was maintaining.

    As an experiment, the next time the scale went up a bit, I made a point of eating what I wanted that day anyway. I reminded myself that the worst case scenario was that I’d have to spend a month peeling off a few pounds, big deal. I know how to do it.

    So I found, over a week or two, that I could just keep on keepin on when the scale went up, and sometimes it would just fall back after a few days without me doing a thing to make it happen.

    I also just took a trip with limited control over when and what I ate. No weigh ins. When I returned, I was only one pound up, and that has mostly gone away on its own within a few days without any effort. And we all know that one pound is not something to even notice much less worry about.

    I do not feel deprived. Two nights ago I was still hungry after dinner and had seconds. It was fine.

    My weight graph finally shows a flatline.

    It took a while to get here but I’m finally in maintenance 👍

    Shoot I missed this until now. What a great update! That’s like a master class on how to find maintenance, well done. I bet seeing that flatline felt about as good as reaching your goal weight. Is that about a 2 lb variation do you know?
  • cwolfman13
    cwolfman13 Posts: 41,865 Member
    My maintenance calories have been variable depending on how active I am mostly. For much of my maintenance I was heavily involved in endurance cycling so I spent a ton of time on my bike and I could pretty much eat whatever and sometimes that still wasn't enough, particularly if I was making efforts to stay on the more healthful side of things most of the time.

    My endurance cycling "career" pretty much came to an end with COVID and I don't have any great interest in spending that much time on the bike these days. I put on about 20 Lbs over the course of about 2 years and I've maintained that weight for going on 2 years and haven't made any significant attempts to bring it back down. My exercise consists primarily of going for a walk most days, and physical recreational activity on the weekends. My maintenance calories now are lower than they were when I was cycling 10+ hours per week, but still in the neighborhood of 2500+ calories so certainly not deprived.
  • herringboxes
    herringboxes Posts: 259 Member
    ddsb1111 wrote: »
    It’s about 4 weeks later, and I think this will be my last update on this.

    I weigh myself daily. Fluctuations upwards do not upset me (and I don’t fluctuate much anyway), but I realized I was subconsciously reducing my intake when the scale went up. (I do not calorie count).

    So it seems this is how I was actually in a deficit while thinking I was maintaining.

    As an experiment, the next time the scale went up a bit, I made a point of eating what I wanted that day anyway. I reminded myself that the worst case scenario was that I’d have to spend a month peeling off a few pounds, big deal. I know how to do it.

    So I found, over a week or two, that I could just keep on keepin on when the scale went up, and sometimes it would just fall back after a few days without me doing a thing to make it happen.

    I also just took a trip with limited control over when and what I ate. No weigh ins. When I returned, I was only one pound up, and that has mostly gone away on its own within a few days without any effort. And we all know that one pound is not something to even notice much less worry about.

    I do not feel deprived. Two nights ago I was still hungry after dinner and had seconds. It was fine.

    My weight graph finally shows a flatline.

    It took a while to get here but I’m finally in maintenance 👍

    Shoot I missed this until now. What a great update! That’s like a master class on how to find maintenance, well done. I bet seeing that flatline felt about as good as reaching your goal weight. Is that about a 2 lb variation do you know?

    For me, yeah, 2lbs covers it. I think 5lbs might be suitable for other people, or even 10lbs. But for whatever reason, I just don’t seem to vary all that much. I don’t go out to eat, I eat similar things day to day, I’m not a drinker, so I don’t have much reason to suddenly take on a lot of water weight from a big meal out or a night of drinking or whatever. And I guess my hormones are pretty steady too.

    How’s it going for you?

  • ddsb1111
    ddsb1111 Posts: 871 Member
    ddsb1111 wrote: »
    It’s about 4 weeks later, and I think this will be my last update on this.

    I weigh myself daily. Fluctuations upwards do not upset me (and I don’t fluctuate much anyway), but I realized I was subconsciously reducing my intake when the scale went up. (I do not calorie count).

    So it seems this is how I was actually in a deficit while thinking I was maintaining.

    As an experiment, the next time the scale went up a bit, I made a point of eating what I wanted that day anyway. I reminded myself that the worst case scenario was that I’d have to spend a month peeling off a few pounds, big deal. I know how to do it.

    So I found, over a week or two, that I could just keep on keepin on when the scale went up, and sometimes it would just fall back after a few days without me doing a thing to make it happen.

    I also just took a trip with limited control over when and what I ate. No weigh ins. When I returned, I was only one pound up, and that has mostly gone away on its own within a few days without any effort. And we all know that one pound is not something to even notice much less worry about.

    I do not feel deprived. Two nights ago I was still hungry after dinner and had seconds. It was fine.

    My weight graph finally shows a flatline.

    It took a while to get here but I’m finally in maintenance 👍

    Shoot I missed this until now. What a great update! That’s like a master class on how to find maintenance, well done. I bet seeing that flatline felt about as good as reaching your goal weight. Is that about a 2 lb variation do you know?

    For me, yeah, 2lbs covers it. I think 5lbs might be suitable for other people, or even 10lbs. But for whatever reason, I just don’t seem to vary all that much. I don’t go out to eat, I eat similar things day to day, I’m not a drinker, so I don’t have much reason to suddenly take on a lot of water weight from a big meal out or a night of drinking or whatever. And I guess my hormones are pretty steady too.

    How’s it going for you?

    That’s fantastic, it really is. Now at goal I notice more energy and stability in my everyday life. Possibly from one less thing on my plate. I’m doing great so far, not actually counting calories anymore tbh, much like yourself. My accountability is seeing the scale and knowing what hormone levels I’m working with. Not quite as dialed in as you though, more like 3-4lbs variation but I’m still very new to maintenance (1.5 months only) and have already encountered a vacation, my birthday, and a holiday so I’m pretty content with that. If it were anytime between Jan- Sept I think it would be even more consistent so I’m optimistic. I’m realizing from your post that now would be an excellent time for me to utilize Happy Scale, so thanks for keeping us posted and sharing your experience.
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  • mtaratoot
    mtaratoot Posts: 14,244 Member
    @tiaamyom

    May I suggest you try to dial the stress back a little bit? Two grams of lettuce? One possible tool is to take a small step back and start thinking about weekly averages. You can go over today and under tomorrow and still be OK. It is totally NOT like the old joke about putting one hand in a pot of boiling water and the other in a pot of ice water and on average you're comfortable. Your body assimilates things over time.

    For sure maintenance is tough. If you haven't already, think about setting a maintenance RANGE. You're sure to have your weight go up and down over and over again. That's maintenance! If it's still within your range, maybe plus or minus three or five pounds depending on your comfort level, just pay attention. Take action if you bounce out of it. Mostly, just keep sticking to it.

    If it's stressing you out, you might give up. That's the only way to fail!
  • Corina1143
    Corina1143 Posts: 3,624 Member
    Years ago I wanted to lose 10-20 pounds. I joined weight Watchers, ate what they told me, easily and quickly lost the weight, spent 3 weeks in bed with flu-like symptoms. Ate regular to cure the flu, gained the weight back and felt great. Repeat, cause apparently I was either thick-headed or young and silly.

    Now I eat a more reasonable diet. I'm back to wanting to lose 10-20 pounds. But this time I'm smart enough to realize I can't do it in 2-3 weeks. Right now I have my MFP goal set to maintenance calories for about 10 pounds less than i weigh now. I try to keep my calories a little under that. Some days are harder. Some days are easier.

    My fluctuations are bigger than I think most people's are--easily 5 pounds in a week, 10 pounds or so more in winter than summer. That's something I'll have to figure out how to handle in maintenance, but it was easy before I gained 100 pounds, so I imagine I can do it again.

    I'm guessing maintenance will be easier for me than for lots of people. I love fruits and veggies. I live alone. I tend to keep enough meat or main dish for 1 or 2 meals handy, fresh veggies to last a week, canned and frozen veggies to last a month. I didn't plan it that way. It's just what I like. But I sure think it will be easier to maintain.