Struggling

Lauraschlafalbert
Lauraschlafalbert Posts: 7 Member
in Health and Weight Loss
Been really struggling with losing. I’ve lowered my amount of calories but really in a slump right now. I guess looking for encouragement.

Replies

  • sk8hrccgf4
    sk8hrccgf4 Posts: 1 Member
    I’m struggling too. I understand how you feel and so disappointed that I am not losing. I will continue to track everything and continue with some form of exercising even if just walking round the block.
  • Strudders67
    Strudders67 Posts: 989 Member
    You may be tracking everything, but are you weighing it first, in grams? Are you measuring all liquids in ml? It's quite shocking how inaccurate your intake could be if you're going by what it says on a packet / are weighing in ounces or cups / are eye-balling and estimating how much something weighs.

    If you're sure your logging is accurate, same questions as above to the OP - starting weight / current weight / height etc? how long have you been tracking your food and drink intake for? what did you set your goal to be? Are you sure you're eating at a deficit?
  • springlering62
    springlering62 Posts: 8,458 Member
    @Strudders67 makes a really valid point.

    In my pre-MFP naïveté, I thought sodas and sweetened coffee drinks “don’t count”, because they went …”.right through me so fast”. I don’t drink, but I would have been dumb enough to think the same of wine, cocktails and beer.

    If only it worked that way IRL.
  • springlering62
    springlering62 Posts: 8,458 Member
    cmriverside wrote: »

    There was a grieving period.

    I hadn’t thought of it that way, but yes indeedily do, there sure was. Well said!
  • AnnPT77
    AnnPT77 Posts: 34,226 Member
    I'm wondering if one of my tiresome platitudes might suit here, too:

    When it comes to picking tactics for weight loss, think about how to make the process (relatively) easy, rather than trying to make it super fast.

    Too many people start in with extreme calorie cuts, restrict themselves from all supposedly "bad foods" including some they could manage to eat in moderation, and maybe stack intense, punitive exercise on top of that.

    Even doing only some of those things can make the process discouraging. Losing a meaningful total amount of weight is going to take at least weeks to months, maybe even a small number of years. That puts a premium on finding an approach that's sustainable that long without requiring white-knuckled "motivation", "willpower", or "discipline".

    After loss, there's maintenance, ideally forever. Finding those sustainable new habits helps get a start on that, too.

    I also wonder what you mean when you say "struggling with losing". Maybe this isn't the case with you, but sometimes people arrive here with expectations of weight loss pace that are unrealistic. There's a lot of nonsense in popular culture about how everyone should be losing two or more pounds (kg or more) per week. Depending on starting point, that can be too fast to be sustainable. A rule of thumb I like is to lose no more than 0.5-1% of current weight per week, with a bias toward the lower end of that unless severely obese and under close medical supervision for deficiencies or complications.

    Lots of good advice above!

    For me, as others have commented, the quality of life improvement from reaching a healthy weight (around 8 years ago) has been huge. I want other people to have that, too. I'm cheering for you to succeed!
  • springlering62
    springlering62 Posts: 8,458 Member
    Lauraschlafalbert wrote: »
    I do think you all are right. I do need to become more involved in the chats/community. That is a goal for me starting tonight, to check the community at least once a day.
    Thank you all

    Laura, while I treasure many of my friends on my private feed, it was participating and reading here on the boards that propelled me. I earned so much. I had some really oddball questions, and despite a few snarky answers ( which I get, because those of us who frequent here see the same questions over and over ad naseum, so I’ve been guilty and flippant myself), anyway, 99.99% of the replies have been genuinely caring and helpful.

    I can sincerely say, nowhere else in internet land will you find people actually pulling (and pushing) for you to succeed.

    Schedule board time into your evening. Maybe with a flavorful cup of zero cal tea.
  • Lauraschlafalbert
    Lauraschlafalbert Posts: 7 Member
    I do feel even with only really reading the comments the last 2 days that it is feeling easier and less stressful. Definitely want to keep up with this goal of coming to the community board
  • cmriverside
    cmriverside Posts: 34,419 Member
    Laura, I'm glad you've decided to connect with us.

    I learned so much about life in general from forums like this one. There is a deep well of wisdom here, (and a little bit of crazy diet myths but we usually jump on that.)

    There is a lot about life that has to come together in order to do a good thing like weight loss.

    Sometimes it's not just about the pounds, but some other "weight" that has to be dropped, too.

    I hope you'll find strength and healing.
  • Lauraschlafalbert
    Lauraschlafalbert Posts: 7 Member
    Thank you
  • springlering62
    springlering62 Posts: 8,458 Member
    Lauraschlafalbert wrote: »
    Thank you

    So glad you’ve checked back in!!!!!!!! How’s it going?
  • ddsb1111
    ddsb1111 Posts: 872 Member
    edited May 9
    springlering62 wrote: »
    @Strudders67 makes a really valid point.

    In my pre-MFP naïveté, I thought sodas and sweetened coffee drinks “don’t count”, because they went …”.right through me so fast”. I don’t drink, but I would have been dumb enough to think the same of wine, cocktails and beer.

    If only it worked that way IRL.

    I used to think bagels were a diet food so I would find the biggest one and lather it in fat free cream cheese and was shocked that all my hard work made me gain weight! I thought I was broken because I was doing all the right things and couldn’t lose weight. Turns out salads, bagels, beverages, etc, can have the same if not more calories than the foods I used to label as “bad”. 🤦🏼‍♀️ Imagery can be highly influential to young minds.
  • ddsb1111
    ddsb1111 Posts: 872 Member
    edited May 9
    cmriverside wrote: »

    There was a grieving period

    🤯 Wow. This is it. I wrote about a mental block a year ago, and in hindsight this is exactly what it was, I just didn’t realize it.

    OP- small changes lead to big changes. It starts with checking in here, participating if that’s your cup of tea, to weighing your food when you log. It’s piece by piece of habits you develop over time. We all have to start somewhere and this is a great start.
  • cmriverside
    cmriverside Posts: 34,419 Member
    🤯 Wow. This is it. I wrote about a mental block a year ago, and in hindsight this is exactly what it was, I just didn’t realize it.

    It's interesting to me that people are so disassociated from their emotions. :smile:

    Definitely fits the Five Stages of Grief:

    denial, anger, bargaining, depression and acceptance

    "Oh, I can't possibly be 220 pounds."
    "Well, crap, I can't eat anything I want. Everyone else is enjoying their meals and I have to flipping watch every bite."
    "Maybe I can still eat ice cream, only less of it. I can't stand Diet Coke so I'll just keep regular Coke."
    "I'll NEVER be thin. My life is horrible if I have to eat like this forever."
    "Okay. I'll try it. I like cucumbers. This isn't that hard once I get into a groove."
  • Lauraschlafalbert
    Lauraschlafalbert Posts: 7 Member
    It is so much a mind set. I can do this. I’ve done it before. This week I’ve done very well and feel more in control. Riding my bike, eating only when hungry and stopping when full. It has definitely helped on the scale this week!
  • AnnPT77
    AnnPT77 Posts: 34,226 Member
    Lauraschlafalbert wrote: »
    It is so much a mind set. I can do this. I’ve done it before. This week I’ve done very well and feel more in control. Riding my bike, eating only when hungry and stopping when full. It has definitely helped on the scale this week!

    Good show! Keep up the goodness, keep up the patient persistence, and you'll do fine. :)
  • Christi6604
    Christi6604 Posts: 247 Member
    edited May 9
    Weight loss can be so weird. When I lost 70 pounds about 13 years ago, there was a period of time that I actually had to add about 100 calories a day to lose.

    If you have been super consistent, are tracking accurately, and are still at the same activity level, I'd encourage you to try some stuff out. Try upping or lowering calories a bit. Try a new workout or activity. Try some new foods.

    Personally, I like new media for ideas. Some things I like are a podcast called Half Size Me...I also like the Happy Scale App because it averages your weight over time for trends.

    We've all been there. I'm currenty at a point when the scale is acting weird - bigger swings than I'm used to. But, I know my food is on point so I'm not too worried about it. My activity is down due to an injury, but I know that won't be forever. It's ok to just hang out at a maintenance level of eating for a while too if you need a break.
  • kshama2001
    kshama2001 Posts: 28,052 Member
    AnnPT77 wrote: »
    I'm wondering if one of my tiresome platitudes might suit here, too:

    When it comes to picking tactics for weight loss, think about how to make the process (relatively) easy, rather than trying to make it super fast.

    Too many people start in with extreme calorie cuts, restrict themselves from all supposedly "bad foods" including some they could manage to eat in moderation, and maybe stack intense, punitive exercise on top of that.

    Even doing only some of those things can make the process discouraging. Losing a meaningful total amount of weight is going to take at least weeks to months, maybe even a small number of years. That puts a premium on finding an approach that's sustainable that long without requiring white-knuckled "motivation", "willpower", or "discipline".

    After loss, there's maintenance, ideally forever. Finding those sustainable new habits helps get a start on that, too.

    I also wonder what you mean when you say "struggling with losing". Maybe this isn't the case with you, but sometimes people arrive here with expectations of weight loss pace that are unrealistic. There's a lot of nonsense in popular culture about how everyone should be losing two or more pounds (kg or more) per week. Depending on starting point, that can be too fast to be sustainable. A rule of thumb I like is to lose no more than 0.5-1% of current weight per week, with a bias toward the lower end of that unless severely obese and under close medical supervision for deficiencies or complications.

    Lots of good advice above!

    For me, as others have commented, the quality of life improvement from reaching a healthy weight (around 8 years ago) has been huge. I want other people to have that, too. I'm cheering for you to succeed!

    Laura, something that might help with sustainable vs fast or just help with building good sustainable habits is the Half Size Me podcast:

    https://www.halfsizeme.com/category/podcast/

    Heather doesn't runs ads but does promote her premium subscription a lot. I just fast forward or tune it out.

  • Lauraschlafalbert
    Lauraschlafalbert Posts: 7 Member
    Thank you

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