Coming back after gaining weight

angelb1983 · May 6

About 3 years ago I lost and got near goal but life happened. I’m 40, went through a divorce and started school to be a nurse. I devoted the first part of my adult life raising my kids. Now I am at my highest weight ever. I’m through my first year of nursing school and currently working full time. Convenient foods are just easier and going through a drive through has just become a way of life. I’ve sat behind a desk trying to study as much as I could, so activity has greatly decreased.
I guess I don’t even remember where to start. It’s discouraging to go from complete confidence to how I feel now. Anyone else been in a similar situation with gaining weight back and was able to lose it again? How did you get over the mental battle?

cpdcardoso · May 6

Start small. Don't set your goals too high. If you set your goals too high you're setting yourself up to failure.

- Increase your water consumption (if it's low)
- Make sure you get between 7 to 8 hours of sleep (assuming this is what your body needs, each one is different)
- Increase your daily steps by an extra 1000 steps, and increase it each week
- Park your car a bit farther than what you usually do
- Start meal prepping. You don't need to do it for a full week right from the start. But try to make it for 2/3 days to get used to the planning. And then later increase.
- Even if you don't meal prep, try to think ahead of what meals you want to do during the week, and then go grocery shopping with that in mind.

You got this!!

BenevolentlyCool · May 6

Keep using MFP even if you don't have success at first. Learn about your habits. It is so helpful to see what works with diet and exercise, but it is also helpful to see what doesn't work. Before MPF I had no idea how many calories I was consuming in a day. Now I know what is a lot and what isn't. As a nurse, you'll probably thrive at this!

Ultimately I have found that success is tied directly to getting an hour of exercise a day. That is what works for me. Stay on your grind and you'll build strong habits. Good Luck!

themommie · May 6

You got this right before I turned 30 I lost 105 lbs I kept it off for about 2 yrs then I gained it all back plus. It was so hard to start again as I was embarrassed and didn’t want to fail again finally when I was 45 I found MFP and instead of looking at the big picture I just concentrated on 10 lbs at a time, not even having a goal until after I lost over 100 lbs. I started with just walking not even a block and kept increasing eventually joining a gym. I lost 135 lbs but it took me 3 yrs I have kept it off until this last yr, ( I gained back 14 lbs) I started stress eating and not exercising due to my husband going through cancer treatment, but I recently have gotten back down to my goal weight…..I am now 61. Sorry this is so long, all this to say you got this. Break it down into small goals……

MichelleB69 · May 6

YES! I'm right there with you...just about 6 weeks ahead actually. I'm 55, divorced 7 years ago, work in healthcare, and devoted the last 5 years to getting my last child through high school. Covid was awful working in healthcare and then perimenopause hit. I gained 50 lbs in the last 6 years: went from being in the best shape of my life at 135 and running half marathons to being totally exhausted and my all time high of 188. At the beginning of this year, I made a promise to myself that I was devoting this entire year to self care. I quit my stressful hospital graveyard shift and accepted a lower paying day shift clinic position so I could resume normal sleeping hours. Then I started working on my diet and exercise. Moderate walking 3 days/week and tracking my food on MFP. I'm down 18 lbs as of this morning and I feel so much better already. You CAN do this. Consistency is more important than motivation...and start with small sustainable baby steps. I had felt so bad for so long, I forgot how good it felt to feel good, KWIM? Nursing school is soooo stressful, but you got this!!

poisonesse · May 6

The first times I lost weight, I just did it on my own, no recording things, just eating less. But then I sky rocketed, and gained about 70 pounds. And I thought I would again just take care of it on my own. This time, I recorded what I ate in a notebook, kept track of calories... and gained another 15 pounds. That's when I found the online community that was going through the same life style changes as I was. And that's what made all the difference for me. I started with WW online, worked for 20 pounds and then stalled. Found Calorie Count and dropped another 10, but then they killed that program. Then I found MFP... and I'm now at goal and down a total of 71 pounds. It's still hard work, and at my age (I'm 72) its even harder. But it is SO doable, and so worth doing! Yes, you're starting over, but you now know the basics. You're probably going to have to give up those drive throughs, and start doing meal prep OR find the healthy options at the drive throughs! But you can do this, just take that first step. The follow it with the next step and before you know it, you'll be well into a healthy life. It takes time, but remember... you are SO worth it!

Skorec11 · May 6

Keep tracking. Get a fitness watch and sync it up. I recommend Garmin or higher end Fitbit. Do diary every day. Mate a promise you will log for 30 days. MFP stress such a great job of giving you reports.
I found a few minor wins keep me going, weigh yourself everyday and get a scale that measures more than weight and send it to your MFP account and put it on your dashboard. Pick up a new sport or class. I'm finally learning how to racewalk and it's a challenge but it's moving the needle down weight, stress level and the sleep wise. My emotional and overall health meter is rising. It does pay off in so many ways. Set a 30 day, 6 mos and 1 year goal and put on repeat/update as you hit. Include new things, self challenges and small to large rewards depending on the milestones in your goals. Try new reading material and feed your soul happy, positive thoughts. Loudly and actively shut down and refuse the self-condemning, non positive, critical and judgemental thoughts from yourself and anyone else that stands in your (own) way to success. Good luck, give us a 15 day and 30 day update post. 😁👏

MargaretYakoda · May 6

Yep.
What they all said.

My first time getting almost to goal weight I was on Weight Watchers. I was using their online program (such as it was so very long ago) it was very expensive and the only real benefit was the online forum. Which they allowed trolls on…. So I stopped.
And then (a very bad thing) happened, which led to a lawsuit (I won) and a mountain of stress.

And then some other stress.
And then living in my car for a couple years.
And then my husband’s obvious strokes…

Anyway. Yeah. Gained a lot back.

Came here after Spark People imploded. (That was a great site!)
Did pretty well for a long while and then….
I don’t even know what happened. I know I hit a massive plateau.
I got out of the habit of tracking my diet and exercising.

I didn’t gain it all back. Fortunately.
But I did gain

And so here I am. Back at it.

It happens.
I think the biggest lesson I am taking from this is don’t quit.
Like, really, really don’t quit.
If there’s a bump in the road?
Just try to keep going.

Solidarity

campbellt189 · May 6

I agree with "starting small". I had significant regain when I stopped paying attention.
four weeks of logging accomplished. A couple of very small changes to consider:
1. Chew every bite at least ten times
2. Put the fork down between bites
3. Set a time and get up and move around every 20 or 30 minutes. Even if it is just pacing 100 steps each time, it makes a difference.

LizbethHeller · May 7

I'm right there with ya. During the pandemic, I took the quarantine 15 and raised them 25. I was disgusted with how I looked and latched on to an "eating plan" that I found in a magazine. Big Mistake! I did lose 25 lb, but I went on a 3 week cruise for my anniversary and gained ALL of it back. In 3 weeks!! So this time I'm doing it right, making smaller but sustainable changes in my eating habits and hoping to lose a pound or 2 per week, without losing muscle in the process.

celizabeta · May 7

I feel your pain!! I've completely let go of some things and the way my clothes fit is telling on me.

I figure I just need to get back to basics and start where I started before: using MFP to get a handle on what and how much I'm eating. Once I got a handle on that (or GET a handle on it), add exercise & water. After that, I fell into some intermittent fasting, which really seemed to help, so I'm just going to re-trace my steps, so to speak. You're going to knock it out the park! I just had to remind myself that I wanted to be healthier, I wanted my clothes to fit better (I hate shopping), and I wanted to feel stronger. That's how I started!

mszindzi · May 7

I can related 100%. 3 years ago I shed over 20lbs for my wedding - I was walking every day, multiple times a day sometimes. But I just never found the desire to continue with it in 2022 and 2023. I am almost at my heaviest as well. It's tough. I realize I like to snack on all the wrong things. Now that the weather is better I have been going out for walks almost daily. But the food part is still a challenge. Here if you need a buddy to help you with accountability or to commiserate if you're having a not so good day! YOU GOT HIS!!!!

slimmerjesse1 · May 8

you did it before, you can do it again. yes, many of us have been there, done that. glad you're on mfp for support.

OnMyOwnWay · May 8

Like everyone has stated... I tend to think many of us are not 'foreign' to the concept of losing and gaining pendulum (I know I'm not).

Small steps. I tend to think the key is to log as accurately and honestly as possible. Not to obsession - keep it healthy mentally and emotionally.

We change with time and things that 'felt right' 5 years ago may not so today. Find a new way to walk a similar line of success as you had in the past.

You can do it again!

MichelleMantle · May 9

I am totally with you!!! Just started my journey back to being healthy today.
After a couple of years of focusing on others rather than myself I find myself 4 stone heavier than I should healthily be.
You can do this, you’ve made the first and most important step of recognising that you need to do something about this. You can’t do anything about the past, but we can focus on the goal and the here and now.
Best of luck !!

FibroHiker · May 9

I was at my skinniest when I was in grad school because I could work out before heading to school and then study after my kids went to bed in the evening. Fast forward 10 years and I find it hard to maintain a lower weight with full time work and managing a household. There's hardly any energy to do much outside of work let alone exercise.

I can help myself maintain because ultimately my goals are about the choices I make. Do you remember the movie Super Size me about how Morgan Spuelock gained a much weight eating McDonald's food every day for a month? Shortly after that movie came out another man did a McDonald's diet where he challenged himself to lose weight by only eating McDonald's food and it worked because of the choices he made for the healthier options available.

It's possible to go both ways. There are so many options at fast food restaurants that don't go against your goals if you know those options, have a plan, and stick to it. I know those days when you are so tired and don't want to have to worry about food prep, or the other days when stress from life makes you want to eat to feel better. You have to decide what goals are more important and then stick to them.

When I don't want to cook I have my burrito bowl I order on the Chipotle app without the heavy cheese and guacamole. There are also options like the Charbroil BBQ chicken sandwich at Carl's jr which is a great healthy alternative when eaten alone without fries. The Eat This Not That website is an excellent resource for learning to eat out and stick to your goals when you are exhausted. Then on those days when you do have the energy you can prepare food at home.

It has taken some time for me to adjust my habits
and priorities to make sure that I take time for myself to food prep to stay within my goals. Over the last year I have also adjusted myself to decline the big food parties at work where I know people are eating a lot of bad foods. Ultimately I have chosen myself. You can too. Take it one step at a time and only work on one goal at a time-- the first goal being that you will figure out what things you can eat on the go, that you like, and help yiu stay within your goals.

mkksemail · May 9

This thread fed my soul - grateful to all the inspiring comments! 🤍🤍🤍 And yep, starting over. I've logged for the last 5 days, going to start a Prolon 5-day Fast Mimicking Diet on Monday (package should arrive today, ordered it last Friday).

I let a knee injury from last August and my disheartenment (is that a word?) with breaking a 19-month 10k/day steps streak sideline me. I lost the fall and winter, and erased 19 months of health gains, PLUS hit a new high "score" (yay me 🙄).

One suggestion for you, @angelb1983 - you said you're working full-time, (PLUS nursing school!) and also that the drive-thru has become a way of life. It sounds like you can afford a meals delivery service, so my suggestion is to treat yourself for a month, or 3 months. There are so many meal delivery services available. Wouldn't it be a treat to have pre-made (healthier than drive-through for sure!) meals ready for you to eat? I took a tip from one of the reviewers of meal kits who said to order more meals (cnet, I think it was), and sign up for biweekly boxes, instead of weekly. You can freeze some to grab and eat in the 2nd week. Depending on your finances and times budget, you could opt for completely pre-made meals, or meal kits that you cook yourself.

Using that money-saving tip (to buy more meals per box), for just the two of us (spouse and me), we signed up for 5 meals of 6 servings each meal (for 30 meals total) from Everyplate. They had a 1st week promo through Forbes that was $1 steak for life (an add-on of 2 servings of ranch steak 10z total) plus $1.49/meal for the first week. After a few weeks, we're going to try out HungryRoot and BlueApron and Dinnerly and one more that I can't recall just now. I'm looking forward to having some easy meals that I don't have to think about or plan for or shop for, for a couple/few months as I get started again ....

My cholesterol was up when I had a labs drawn for a physical a few weeks ago, so I feel motivated to fix this, and avoid statins. The last couple years, before I let my knee injury sabotage myself, I wasn't following a 'food plan' other than logging, and focusing on increased veggies, fruit, fiber, and protein. But, I don't want to wait 19 months : so this time I'm trying the FMD (fasting mimicking diet) along with time-restricted IF 12:12 (maybe moving to 14:10 after a bit, we'll see). Both are supposed to have positive impacts on cholesterol, so .... fingers crossed ! I'm going to pair the FMD / TR IF with 'reasonable meals' via meal delivery services for the initial weeks to couple/few months. Might as well make it easy, as my knee is still troublesome.

For the FMD / TR IF plan: I bought 4 five-day FMD cycles from Prolon. They're meant to be no more than 1 cycle per month, so that'll will take 4 months (hope I can do a 5 day 'fast' b/c they're not returnable!), plus I bought 4 one-day 'reset' daily kits. I'm thinking of doing a weekly 'fast' using the 1 day kits, at least for the first month. We'll see how it goes before I commit to the weekly FMD reset 'fasts'. If it works for me, then I guess I'll be doing a 6:1 version of IF, with time-restricted (TR) 12:12 or 14:10 eating patterns for 6 days, plus 1 day of FMD reset 'fast'.

Good luck. You got this, girl.
Cheers! ~ mk

rtlenton · May 9

Well done, and welcome back. I'm sure it is daunting, but the first thing you should do is ditch the drive thru. Although convenient, there is little of nutritional value at drive thrus and buffets.

As a start, take time on Sunday to prepare as many healthy snacks and meals as possible. It will take the guesswork out of cooking for the rest of the week and make a trip to the drive thru less likely.

missbunnypenny · May 10

I agree with what everyone else has said. I also find that planning ahead, and logging your food in MFP in advance really helps. Sometimes just seeing it in black and white makes me rethink my choices. If you've logged ahead, you can change your mind but you can't undo what you've already consumed.

Those tiny changes can really help. Good luck! x

MargaretYakoda · May 10

mkksemail wrote: »

I let a knee injury from last August and my disheartenment (is that a word?) with breaking a 19-month 10k/day steps streak sideline me.

I feel this!

One of the things that demotivated me in the past was not closing all my rings in Apple Fitness.

That, and Apple Fitness arbitrarily sets a goal every month for users, and (last I checked) they’d just make each goal to be more difficult than previous months.
AND you can’t dip out of goals that are physically impossible for you to achieve.

Takes a while for a fit 30 year old amateur athlete to get to the point where they can’t do a goal like “run 564 miles this month” (yes. That is a real goal Apple Fitness automatically set for someone!)

But me? I can barely walk.
Some of the goals are not achievable, and Apple, in their infinite wisdom, have not yet been convinced to allow people to choose alternatives.

I’ve had to learn to become less competitive against myself. Learn to live with not making one of these goals, or live with breaking a streak, and just keep on keeping on.

Solidarity.

The struggle is real.

mkksemail · May 10

MargaretYakoda wrote: »

mkksemail wrote: »

I let a knee injury from last August and my disheartenment (is that a word?) with breaking a 19-month 10k/day steps streak sideline me.

I feel this!

One of the things that demotivated me in the past was not closing all my rings in Apple Fitness.

... I’ve had to learn to become less competitive against myself. Learn to live with not making one of these goals, or live with breaking a streak, and just keep on keeping on.

Solidarity.

The struggle is real.

Ahhhhh, your words hit like raindrops on a thirsty lawn

. Thank you! *fist bump* It's so hard to 'let a streak go', but you're right. You're so right.

Cheers
~ mk

Coming back after gaining weight

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