Decide what you want to be and then Be It

13

Replies

  • tashjs21
    tashjs21 Posts: 4,584 Member
    MFP is turning into Big Brother. :mad: :explode: :mad:

    Watch what you say, even in private. :grumble:
  • TamTastic
    TamTastic Posts: 19,224 Member
    MFP is turning into Big Brother. :mad: :explode: :mad:

    Watch what you say, even in private. :grumble:
    So I hear!! :angry:
  • Mireille
    Mireille Posts: 5,134 Member
    MFP is turning into Big Brother. :mad: :explode: :mad:

    Watch what you say, even in private. :grumble:

    What about what I do in private?:blushing:
  • cheermom11
    cheermom11 Posts: 393 Member
    I believe that there are people on here with real psychological disorders, I just don't know that we are qualified to counsel them - and we certainly shouldn't enable them. Those MFP'ers are unique. The rest of us need to get real and get over it. As soon as I did, Like Tami, my weight finally started dropping.
  • SoupNazi
    SoupNazi Posts: 4,229 Member
    MFP is turning into Big Brother. :mad: :explode: :mad:

    Watch what you say, even in private. :grumble:

    No doubt.
    :grumble:
  • yellow_pepper
    yellow_pepper Posts: 708 Member
    Let's face it. MFP is a soap opera and some self-selected users are the actors. Those who make themselves most conspicuous - "MFP celebrities," so to speak - should expect a certain amount of scrutiny and criticism. In general, anyone who posts content in the public domain should accept that it comes with attention and criticism - just like a blogger/journalist/fitness guru (as some members seem to want to be) would receive. Some of it is going to be unfavorable or unwanted!

    On the tattling issue, as far as I know, Mike is the only one making money off of this site. Why anyone else is working themselves into a rage over different members' comments is beyond me. Heck, if I got paid to report people for being mean, I would. But otherwise, I won't. What's there to gain but a heightened sense of self-righteousness? And does it make certain members feel good to "tattle-tale" on others? I really hope it's not anyone calling for us to "act like adults" who's running to Principal Mike.
  • Mireille
    Mireille Posts: 5,134 Member
    Let's face it. MFP is a soap opera and some self-selected users are the actors. Those who make themselves most conspicuous - "MFP celebrities," so to speak - should expect a certain amount of scrutiny and criticism. In general, anyone who posts content in the public domain should accept that it comes with attention and criticism - just like a blogger/journalist/fitness guru (as some members seem to want to be) would receive. Some of it is going to be unfavorable or unwanted!

    On the tattling issue, as far as I know, Mike is the only one making money off of this site. Why anyone else is working themselves into a rage over different members' comments is beyond me. Heck, if I got paid to report people for being mean, I would. But otherwise, I won't. What's there to gain but a heightened sense of self-righteousness? And does it make certain members feel good to "tattle-tale" on others? I really hope it's not anyone calling for us to "act like adults" who's running to Principal Mike.

    Hey, didn't I just read this? :wink:

    Great post! :flowerforyou:
  • flcaoh
    flcaoh Posts: 444
    Let's face it. MFP is a soap opera and some self-selected users are the actors. Those who make themselves most conspicuous - "MFP celebrities," so to speak - should expect a certain amount of scrutiny and criticism. In general, anyone who posts content in the public domain should accept that it comes with attention and criticism - just like a blogger/journalist/fitness guru (as some members seem to want to be) would receive. Some of it is going to be unfavorable or unwanted!

    On the tattling issue, as far as I know, Mike is the only one making money off of this site. Why anyone else is working themselves into a rage over different members' comments is beyond me. Heck, if I got paid to report people for being mean, I would. But otherwise, I won't. What's there to gain but a heightened sense of self-righteousness? And does it make certain members feel good to "tattle-tale" on others? I really hope it's not anyone calling for us to "act like adults" who's running to Principal Mike.

    I agree 100%.
  • staceyw37
    staceyw37 Posts: 2,094 Member
    i'll be brief--i just wrote a post but it lost its link??

    anyway, i did not complain or tattle to mike re: dave's original post or his style of delivery. i simply put up my post, lurky loo'd and moved on.

    i am very sorry to hear that dave was suspended. i don't see the reason for it.
    in any case, i was not intending or wanting to cause drama, conflict, or side taking. i was not hoping to get anyone in "trouble."

    i stand by my original post, but i apologize for causing any problems. mea culpa
  • jackeh
    jackeh Posts: 1,515 Member

    On the tattling issue, as far as I know, Mike is the only one making money off of this site. Why anyone else is working themselves into a rage over different members' comments is beyond me. Heck, if I got paid to report people for being mean, I would. But otherwise, I won't. What's there to gain but a heightened sense of self-righteousness? And does it make certain members feel good to "tattle-tale" on others? I really hope it's not anyone calling for us to "act like adults" who's running to Principal Mike.

    :huh: are you referring to me?
  • johnblake
    johnblake Posts: 661
    I guess others didn't because Dave was suspended for 7 days.

    It's a shame someone can't express their opinions without getting into trouble even if those opinions aren't exactly "PC".

    Oh well! :ohwell:

    that sucks I liked Dave
  • personally, i don't think i've read any posts with lamenations or excuses since i joined (maybe i'm not on the board enough yet??). but i will say that until someone's mind can get itself around tricks to avoid repeating bad behaviors, no amount of attaboys OR reality checks from someone else will wake someone up to help them get out of their sad repetitive situation of failure. it has to come from within.

    nothing anyone could say to me could push me to stay on track. i always joked that all you have to do is ask a fat person how to lose weight - they certainly know how, its putting into practice that is hard.

    i started being serious last summer, soooo long ago, and since then i have only lost 13 pounds. but you know what? i lost ten pounds slowly over 3 months, then HELD that loss in place through the winter, and i'm here, just lost three pounds in the past ten days, raring to go. this seriousness had to come from ME, so that I didn't lose my motivation over the past six months. this could have been like so many other times i didn't follow through, but six months of staying serious about this has proven to me that this time its a real lifestyle change, not verbiage.
  • kerrilucko
    kerrilucko Posts: 3,852 Member
    I do think it's sad that he was suspended, but it's only a week, he'll be back.

    Bottom line is that this post (and a whole range of others by other posters at other times) can be taken as VERY offensive. I personally am not offended, but I still see it as inappropriate... I'd love to see MFP go back to being the supportive, friendly place I was greeted with when I first joined last year. :flowerforyou:
  • MyaPapaya75
    MyaPapaya75 Posts: 3,143 Member
    reads and refrains from commenting but silently agrees with Dave:glasses:
  • mrsyac2
    mrsyac2 Posts: 2,784 Member
    I guess others didn't because Dave was suspended for 7 days.

    It's a shame someone can't express their opinions without getting into trouble even if those opinions aren't exactly "PC".

    Oh well! :ohwell:

    that sucks I liked Dave

    So much for freedom of speech- or typing in that matter
  • Marla64
    Marla64 Posts: 23,120 Member
    reads and refrains from commenting but silently agrees with Dave:glasses:

    :laugh:
  • johnblake
    johnblake Posts: 661
    I guess others didn't because Dave was suspended for 7 days.

    It's a shame someone can't express their opinions without getting into trouble even if those opinions aren't exactly "PC".

    Oh well! :ohwell:

    that sucks I liked Dave

    So much for freedom of speech- or typing in that matter

    I may not agree with what you say but I will defend to the death your right to say it

    but this is Mike's web page so he rules
  • Marla64
    Marla64 Posts: 23,120 Member
    I guess others didn't because Dave was suspended for 7 days.

    It's a shame someone can't express their opinions without getting into trouble even if those opinions aren't exactly "PC".

    Oh well! :ohwell:

    that sucks I liked Dave

    So much for freedom of speech- or typing in that matter

    I may not agree with what you say but I will defend to the death your right to say it

    but this is Mike's web page so he rules

    Yep-- another very important bottom line-- he who owns the website makes the rules--

    We're guests here.
  • johnblake
    johnblake Posts: 661
    I guess others didn't because Dave was suspended for 7 days.

    It's a shame someone can't express their opinions without getting into trouble even if those opinions aren't exactly "PC".

    Oh well! :ohwell:

    that sucks I liked Dave
    So much for freedom of speech- or typing in that matter

    I may not agree with what you say but I will defend to the death your right to say it

    but this is Mike's web page so he rules

    Yep-- another very important bottom line-- he who owns the website makes the rules--

    We're guests here.

    Is'nt the golded rule..................................the one with the gold makes the rules:laugh:
  • nickybr38
    nickybr38 Posts: 674 Member
    Y'know, I've stayed out of these rants in the past. But enuf is enuf!!

    Everyone is at different stages of this getting healthy process. Some have an easier time at it than others. Just like some find flying a spaceship easier than others. And while I agree that this site and support require commitment, no one deserves to be talked down to. NONE, NOT ONE of us knows exactly what it's like for someone else on this journey, what particular challenges they face. And while some of us can vault over those obstacles, others stumble--again and again. This is not a character flaw. This is not that a person is bad. This is not that a person is not sufficiently dedicated to the cause. It's just that they/WE are humans and humans take time and practice to learn new things. Everyone learns at a different rate. And everyone learns in different ways. We are not dogs. We are people.

    I'm a mom of three and much as i'd like to parent all 3 the same way, b/c it'd be faster and easier, the reality is that each child is unique and must be approached with that kind of respect. They are not quality controlled gadgets from a factory. Each one has different gifts and handicaps and rather than "boot camp" them into conforming to a single standard, my job as mother is to support with lovingkindness each one as he/she walks their path. I don't yell at my 8 year old for falling off her bike a bunch of times and that's even with the training wheels. I accept that is where she is for now, and gently encourage her to go forward, to challenge herself to reach the goal of independent bike riding. Again, I don't berate her for not having acquired a certain skill set. Instead, I lovingly guide her to the next step.

    And that's what MFP is for, too. Some people just need a little help tweaking the great things they are doing. Like moving onto P90x from the Leslie Sansone series. And others are babies in this journey. They may KNOW they shouldn't eat/drink crap, they/we may know we need to move more, we/they may have dire health issues staring us right in the face--but implementing that knowledge, being able to execute on it takes time and practice. This is no different than when I remind my older girls that their little brother doesn't know or can't do xyz things yet--he's still new to the planet (2 years old). By the same token, some of us are new to the planet of committed, healthy living.

    If you are not interested in being that kind of support or teacher, that's fine. Just don't read those posts-- the had a bad weekend ones, the i fell off the wagon ones. Just stay focused on your goals and the posts that are meaningful to you. And when you have something to share in a lovingly supportive way, put it out there.

    I am very grateful for the MFP diaries, logs and boards. And I would hate for people to turn away from this site just b/c they are not yet at the top tier of commitment. Of course, it's ideal when people really make the changes that count, but even without that (yet), people should still be able to come to this site and find kindness, support, encouragement, challenges and respect.

    So, this is a reminder to the long-timers and the short-timers who sometimes lose sight of that. And to all of MFP--we are strong, capable, treasured people who can reach our goals.
    Thank you.:heart:

    I don't know if I'm the minority or what but I really liked this comment. :smile:
  • yellow_pepper
    yellow_pepper Posts: 708 Member

    On the tattling issue, as far as I know, Mike is the only one making money off of this site. Why anyone else is working themselves into a rage over different members' comments is beyond me. Heck, if I got paid to report people for being mean, I would. But otherwise, I won't. What's there to gain but a heightened sense of self-righteousness? And does it make certain members feel good to "tattle-tale" on others? I really hope it's not anyone calling for us to "act like adults" who's running to Principal Mike.

    :huh: are you referring to me?

    I'm not referring to anyone as I don't know who is running to Mike. But I'm sorry that whoever is has nothing better to do. The end.
  • awestfall
    awestfall Posts: 1,774 Member
    Before you take your next dump, you will read at least three threads about how someone NEEDS HELP...or how someone is SO DEPRESSED....all because what they really want is everyone to come running and say It's ok that you ate like a fat pig and "its ok that you cant stop eating ice cream or cake or cookies or any of that crap that you don't want to "deprive" yourself of.

    What do you really want to do? Get fit? Get in shape? Or find people to enable your crap eating?

    Oh...that is so mean Dave....you dont understand Dave.....why? what happened? did your Mom pull your hair when you were 6 years old? OH...sure that is a great reason to eat like a selfish pig when you are 25. Oh...your dog peed on your doll when you were 8? Eat like a zombie...,.its OK.

    Are there valid reasons for over eating? Of course. But we have become a society of victims. We now have more "disorders" than girl scout cookies. Why didnt our parents and grandparents have all these "disorders"? Because they didnt have all this time to whine. They were working and eating regular food. Fat cow..skinny cow....fake butter...fake cookies ...fake pills,,,,,they never heard of such nonesense............QUIT IT!

    You have a good reason to eat crap? Get over it. Sure, there are some real whackos here and everywhere. You want to lose weight? Quit eating crap. Simple as that. Oh...but we shouldnt deprive ourselves Dave. Who is it exactly that you are depriving? Quit fooling yourself. Wake up.

    All these enablers wanting to be nice and sweet. Is that really the support you need? If our soldiers got tired and wanted to take a "cheat" day...would that be ok too?

    This is a serious deal. Alot of you are facing diabetes or worse, Quit eating crap. This place is called my Fitness Pal...it is not called My Sympathy Pal...but that seems to be what alot of people want.

    Before you attack me for not "understanding" this is exactly what I tell myself when I want to slack off. I repeat, I tell this to myself also. So dont give me your flack about not understanding the hidden excuses that are the real reason you won't stop "depriving" yourself.

    Now,,,go take a healthy dump.:smile:
    I have to agree with you Dave:flowerforyou: we should stop eating junk and just do it
  • ErinD
    ErinD Posts: 14
    Wow great post!! I have been trying to find a decent ftness site and have been on dozens over the years, as a fitness junkie I am always looking for different information and new ideas....Unfortunately they all have these threads...people who would rather be on here posting/complaining then out there doing....
  • Mireille
    Mireille Posts: 5,134 Member
    Don't tell Dave but I think I miss him.
  • Yes, yes and yes.

    There's no quick fix. No easy road.

    Self discipline is the only way.

    But, by the same token, every journey of 1,000 miles begins with the first step.
    So whilst we should be strict we should not berate one another for falling off the road once in a while.
    So long as the falling is accompanied by, "I know why I fell and what I must do to get back up and not repeat that mistake" and not "I fell feel sorry for me I can't help it"

    It's a journey but you only get to the end if you follow the path.
    And you can't follow the path unless you know the route and have the discipline to stick to it.
  • Shannon023
    Shannon023 Posts: 14,529 Member

    Self discipline is the only way.


    BINGO!!! :drinker:
  • TamTastic
    TamTastic Posts: 19,224 Member
    Preggo BUMP!
  • johnblake
    johnblake Posts: 661
    Preggo BUMP!

    see what happens when you get in shape :drinker:
  • Shannon023
    Shannon023 Posts: 14,529 Member
    Preggo BUMP!

    On Dave's thread????? :noway: :noway:

    I wasn't aware you two had even met. :noway:


    {{snicker}} :bigsmile:
  • TamTastic
    TamTastic Posts: 19,224 Member
    Preggo BUMP!

    On Dave's thread????? :noway: :noway:

    I wasn't aware you two had even met. :noway:


    {{snicker}} :bigsmile:
    hush.gif
This discussion has been closed.