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LESS Alcohol ~ SEPTEMBER 2024 ~ One Day at A Time
Replies
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Thanks for sharing your thoughts and experience with your road to less @shorepine. You are doing so great and inspire me!
@globalhiker agree that positivity is so mandatory for us! We must stay lifted and be compassionate toward ourselves. And surely, a negative parents’ hold on us is hard to break. Oh my, that’s could be a whole other conversation.
Maybe we can all practice some personal positivity this weekend - when a negative thought comes up for us we can reframe it and tell ourselves we are worthy, and not perfect - but certainly not an idiot or stupid.
In my life, I learned along time ago (through the grace of God) that I’m right where I’m supposed to be with both mistakes and triumphs. I also try to only associate with those who lift me up, and minimize time with those who don’t.
Happy weekend all!
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I tried/succumbed to the negative self talk for many years, and all it did was erode my self worth. I'm not great at the positive self talk now, but I'm working on it!
2 glasses of sparkling wine over about 2 hours last night, then came home and switched back to water. Generally stopping once I've started has been my biggest hurdle, but I seem to be conquering that of late, so that's a bit victory. I did think VERY hard about grabbing something on the way home though, but didn't.
So September:
A - 2
AF - 11
And both A days were only 2 drinks.9 -
AF = 4
A = 98 -
8 AF
6 A8 -
8 A
5 AF
Better than most months.
My goal is to be 50/50 by Sept. 30th.8 -
September:
AF=6
A=7
My A days have taken lead over AF for the first time this month. I was going to be upset that AF isn't ahead anymore, but it's the first time A days are higher and it's the middle of the month, so that's a small win for me! Usually I'm trying to play catch-up with AF all month long.
I have a very busy day today but will try to check in later to chat.
I love the conversations that are happening, and the positivity is very inspiring!8 -
Had the rest of the low calorie KJ Chardonnay last night - (bottle lasted 3 nights) and a half glass of regular.
This time, I didn’t say to myself well I drank today so I might as well have ALL the wine and open another bottle (taken and relating from @Alatariel75).
I have had a two more A days than I planned this week but I have stopped at my personal limit. Have some catching up to do this weekend.
Current:
AF days - 4
A days - 5
LA - 4 (under 8 oz. wine or 8% alcohol)
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I realize that most of your goals are to drink "Less Alcohol". Which is probably fine for most people.
But I have to be honest with myself. I am not most people! Moderation just doesn't work for me. Many of you have read some of my posts. But some of you are new or returning to this thread.
For those that didn't read my post. I've had some really wacky plans for moderating my drinking. Actually they were pretty good plans. But I just couldn't stick to them. Several years ago I really liked drinking in the afternoon while I was working in the yard. At the time it actually gave me more energy. So my plan was to only drink on Tuesdays, Thursdays and Saturdays (Tuesday was lawn mowing day). And I had many other plans too. They all looked good on paper. But I couldn't stick to any of them.
Yesterday my husband and I were out. And we stopped at the liquor store. It was a little earlier than I normally would have gone to the store. After I got home, I realized that what I had bought (a pint) might not be enough. So I went back and bought another 1/2 pint. I ended up drinking more than I should. And I didn't throw out the rest before bed. So here I am at 10 o'clock in the morning drinking. I'm going right back to my old habits. And that is not acceptable!
So tomorrow I am quitting for good! I will be posting tomorrow after 5 pm when the liquor store will be closed. The positive part of this is that the scale will start moving in the right direction again 🙂
Have a nice rest of your weekend everyone!
12 -
@SurferGirl1982
Your post is very insightful. Hoping that you don't have much left in that bottle for today and don't go back out to the store. You can do this!
6 -
@looneycatblue I actually asked my husband to go to the store this morning and get more because I just cannot stop midstream.
But tomorrow I will have nothing. I'm not yet at the point where I will have physical issues stopping cold turkey. It is going to happen tomorrow. I want to get back to feeling good in the morning and getting out and doing a bunch of projects that I have planned out in the yard. I want everything nice before winter comes around. And I still have a bit of weight that I would like to lose!
Thanks for your support! I hope you are doing well!4 -
@SurferGirl1982 I appreciate your honest posts and self reflections. It really is so meaningful to me and many others.
I KNOW I need to quit for good. But I make rules and bargains with myself. I can't tell you how many bottles I have poured out.
I admire those who can moderate. My brain loves to trick me and say "how about we have a glass of wine and then that's it." Sometimes I can stop at a few and sometimes I binge. Once I get some traction with AF days, I am so happy with myself. And then I have one sip and I'm back to drinking. It is such hard work to be sober and I pray that one day I will put in the hard work needed.
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14th AF day is here. I've only been craving chocolate and ice cream. Since it's Saturday, I'll go take a nap to let that feeling pass. I really needed to go food shopping but if I go now, I will fill the cart with goodies.
To keep my motivation up, most nights I'll read other people's AF stories on Reddit or Clubsoda or similar sites. In the morning, I make a health intention where I tell myself my Plan for the day.
For anyone struggling, I find hot soup comforting and really good gourmet hot chocolate helps me.10 -
@RubyRed427 We seem to have similar drinking patterns. I also admire those that can have just a few and then it's all good!
I've been drinking for years and have been making all sorts of rules (as you do) for so many years. But I can't stick to those rules. Wouldn't it be nice if we could? I've also poured out a lot of booze over the years. Be careful of saying that though...you may be accused of alcohol abuse 🙂
My brain also tricks me into thinking that I can have a drinking day here and there. But it always leads back to daily drinking.
My personal best for AF is four months. And I definitely prefer AF over daily drinking. Once I get a few days AF it really isn't that hard. Until my mind says to me, "You've been doing so well! You deserve a drink!".
I guess there's some people that just can't drink. And I'm one of those 😕7 -
@globalhiker You're doing really well 🙂 Unfortunately I've been a bit of a mess 😕
I hope to have the strength and/or motivation that you obviously have.
I do believe I will!
4 -
Popping by tonight to log my AF day. This morning I decided I wanted to be wine free tonight and was successful without any cravings.
I am planning on no sugar or wine for tomorrow as well.
I’m also counting down days to our vacation next week. Another reason for me to cut back this week on all the things!
Current:
AF days - 5
A days - 5
LA - 4 (under 8 oz. wine or 8% alcohol)6 -
RubyRed and Surfergirl, I'm like you both as well. Moderation doesn't work for me. My moderation is 1 bottle of wine instead of 2...I don't think that counts
If there's wine in the house, I'll drink it. If I don't have enough to get through the night, I'll DoorDash some (Why don't I just go to bed?)
Last night was a casino night. What did I do? Bought a bottle of wine in case I wanted more when we got home. There's half a bottle left that I am going to poor down the drain. Otherwise I'll buy another bottle to go with it and continue the cycle for the week.
I am beginning to love the way it feels to sleep without wine, so I'm hoping that motivates me to do that more often. Hang in there! We can beat this beast! I am definitely planning AF tonight and hopefully the whole week!
AF = 4
A = 10
10 -
@SurferGirl1982 when you said: "My personal best for AF is four months. And I definitely prefer AF over daily drinking. Once I get a few days AF it really isn't that hard. Until my mind says to me, "You've been doing so well! You deserve a drink!". I've experienced exactly what you said and then some. At the 30 day mark, the wine devil in my head wakes up after being quiet so long and starts to tell me I deserve a day off (not a drink, a whole day). If I make it past the 30 day "milestone" and 60 day "milestone", he pops back in to say the same. This scenario is very normal and typical. We need to arm ourselves with support to keep our resolve and commitment to our goals and don't listen to that bad wine devil. Thanks for reminding me of this.
No drinks last night and I am past the 2 week milestone, no wine devils emerged but I did have a dream I drank a large glass of white wine and I woke up queasy, so odd!9 -
I love the stories going on here this morning - they are real, honest and so meaningful to this group! It is comforting to know we have this safe space to share. I can very much relate to buying ‘more’ to be sure I have ‘enough’ or ‘just in case’ for the day or week. This seems to be sporadic but yeah I get it! But in the past (pre-LA in Feb. 2023), I bought six-packs of wine each week which is something I no longer do.
Last night I tried the mango Greek yogurt Yasso bar, super tropical and good. I slept all night after no wine and woke early.
I feel so good that today, I’m going into the day with a decision to skip the wine again this evening.
May you all find your best resolve if just for today!
Current:
AF days - 6
A days - 5
LA - 4 (under 8 oz. wine or 8% alcohol)7 -
Last week was busier than usual, was good about keeping to my 10 oz limit until Thursday, and then the flood gates opened - so woke up at 4 am Friday am, in my typical post bing hangxiety attach. I am so disappointed in myself. then i spend the next day giving myself all the negative self- talk. After reading the other posts, I was suprised that other folks also are dealing with the negative self talk. It’s crazy how it’s just there, and seems so automatic and it takes effort to flip the script.
I really want to, but dont want to, do a string of AF days. Someone mentioned about a 24hour AF trial- I really like that idea - it’s just a different way to think about it. I am going to try AF from 4 pm Mon- 4 PM Tue this week.
Positive vibes to all for a great week this week.10 -
Yesterday was the first day in a long time that I had alcohol in the house in the morning. I usually pour any leftovers down the drain the night before. After yesterday I remember why I started doing that. My day was not very pleasant or productive. I'm sure there's people out there that can have alcohol in the house and not touch it until later in the afternoon (or even another day). But not me...if it's there I will drink it ☹️ I'm one of the oddballs in this group...I drink Black Velvet Canadian whiskey (not wine).
@chicbuc You're lucky you have DoorDash. I live in such a small town that those services aren't available. My profile says I live in Roseburg which is larger and does have most of those services. We used to live there (and I still consider that I do). But we made a bad decision years ago and moved to this tiny town. At the time, we thought, well Roseburg is only 15 miles from here. But it became old very quickly...grocery stores, big box stores (15 miles), doctor's and vets offices (15 miles). You get the picture. Most people that live here seem to like the small town thing. But not me!
I do the same thing that you do. If I'm going somewhere that I'll be having a drink or two, I make sure I have a bottle of whiskey at home. I can't drink just a couple and stop there.
@globalhiker I guess that it is a common scenario that when we reach a certain milestone (30, 60, 90 days), we feel like we should be able to reward ourselves with a drink day. But for people like us, it seems that it never stops at one drink day.
@Michieb125 You seem to be sticking to your goals pretty good this month! But a string of AF days does feel good 🙃 Maybe just aim for a 2 day streak once or twice a week 🤔
I definitely plan on being AF tonight. Mainly because I need to get my streak going again. Plus, my husband would not be happy with me! And the weight is starting to creep back on...ugh!
I hope everyone has a great and productive day!
7 -
AF = 11
A = 4
Didn’t drink Friday. Drank almost a full bottle of wine while celebrating my bestie’s birthday yesterday, but it was over the course of the day. So I got a little tipsy, but not drunk and no hangover. Slept good too.
I will not drink tonight, so I’m logging it. Too tired to drink. It’s been so damn busy around here. I’m ready for a break.8 -
RubyRed and Surfergirl, I'm like you both as well. Moderation doesn't work for me. My moderation is 1 bottle of wine instead of 2...I don't think that counts If there's wine in the house, I'll drink it. If I don't have enough to get through the night, I'll DoorDash some (Why don't I just go to bed?)
Last night was a casino night. What did I do? Bought a bottle of wine in case I wanted more when we got home. There's half a bottle left that I am going to poor down the drain. Otherwise I'll buy another bottle to go with it and continue the cycle for the week.
I am beginning to love the way it feels to sleep without wine, so I'm hoping that motivates me to do that more often. Hang in there! We can beat this beast! I am definitely planning AF tonight and hopefully the whole week!
AF = 4
A = 10
I do that too. When I go out for a happy hour after work, I will plan ahead and make sure a bottle of wine is in the fridge waiting for me.
I am so much more productive on evenings that I don't drink. When I start with a glass after work, then I'm a slug.
I even cook dinner so that I can drink a glass or two while I'm cooking. My longest streak is 9 months, but I do recall I had to isolate myself from my drinking buddies and stay home. But during those 9 months, I taught myself how to build a web page and learned new things and had hobbies. I regret I didn't continue after those 9 months. I use an app called NOMO. I can even reread my old journal entries from 6 years ago when I was sober for a few months. I've been trying to quit for about 10 years now. Maybe this is our year!!!10 -
Hi Everyone,
Well, I wasn't successful again today. I do have an excuse though. But it's not a very good one 😁
So for September:
AF - 1
A - 14
Believe it or not, a few years ago, that would have been a major accomplishment for me. There were years in the past that I didn't have an AF day for the entire year.
I think I need to be a more liberal with my goals. This month I intended to have a total AF month. Maybe that's being a bit too ambitious?
I think I can manage being AF for the next five days (Monday - Friday). I'm going to try for that. I think if I can go 5 days AF, I can continue and have another decent streak.
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One Day At A Time....
There's Monday. One small step. All by itself. No pressure.
There's Tuesday. No need to worry about tomorrow's goal. Just do today. Only 24 hours & 1/3 of them are asleep.
There's Wednesday. You can do anything for just one day. Got this.
There's Thursday. You are strong. You are in charge.
Friday...Saturday....Sunday.....
Sigh.
There's Monday....
My life story 🍷11 -
I caved and started drinking my wine that I didn't pour out at around noon when I sat down to watch football...and DoorDashed another bottle. Then I woke up in the middle of the night because I don't sleep as well when I drink and like @Michelle9912 started with the negative self talk. Lather, rinse, repeat.
@SurferGirl1982 I'm with you for the next 5 days...M-F...let's do this!
@RubyRed427 Keep on keeping on. If you did it once, you can do it again!
@NonnieDoiron You're doing so well! Hope things settle down and you get a break!
@Michieb125 I'm enjoying the honest conversations as well. It helps us all know we're not alone and we're not crazy. You can this today. We can all do this...just for today.
AF = 4
A = 117 -
Happy Monday my LA friends.
AF - 4
A - 11
Back from Alaska and ready to put the work in to get my alcohol consumption down and shed 10lbs.
Day one is today! 10 -
September:
AF=6
A=96 -
Like many others here, I'm also not a moderation kind of gal
Once I've opened the bottle, or even brought it into the house, I'm going to go through as much as I can. It's one of two things for me: either I don't want any left for the next day because then I'll go out and buy more to go with it that next day (I know some others here have said the same thing), or I actually challenge myself to finish it - "Bet you can't finish the whole thing." "Yeah, you just watch me".7 -
I really need to find a new way to celebrate things!
We've been converting our garage into a bedroom suite for my BIL (he's getting dementia and can no longer live alone). We're doing the painting ourselves to save some $$ and I've been celebrating every milestone: Friday was walls done wine, Saturday was doors done prosecco and Sunday was trim done wine.
Fortunately all I have left now is some touch-up work, not enough work to warrant a celebration, LOL.
Rainy here today, tonight is tea night.10 -
Happy Monday LA friends:
AF both Saturday and Sunday by using the 24 hour method suggested here.
Slept well and better yet, no anxiety whether to drink or whether to have a dry day.
I made the decisions separately each morning upon wake that I’m skipping the wine “just for the day” and was able to stick to it. There was no negotiating with myself later and honestly didn’t think about it again.
Made my 6 days so far and want 3 more before vacation starts next weekend. Tonight will be another AF day. I honestly haven’t done 3 in a row for months, but know I can today. I’m trying a mindful and balanced approach to LA this week which worked very well for me last year.
Current:
AF days - 6
A days - 5
LA - 4 (under 8 oz. wine or 8% alcohol)
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