I'm depressed. I'm having doubts again.
SpiritSoldier92
Posts: 12
A few different things are weighing me down. I haven't got a job, am hoping to have one soon, but the facts that I still can't say that I do hurts. Another thing that hurts, is that there's a girl I wanna ask out, but I just don't feel like I deserve to ask her out. Plus, she hasn't been talking to me lately.
The two of us never really hung out, mostly only saw each other on special occasions. But I started upping the amount I was talking to her, now I don't get to talk to her at all. She's one of my reasons for wanting to do this. It's getting hard. My reasons for doing this are fading away and I can't stretch out my hands to grab them. I can only struggle after them and hope that I can reach them.
The two of us never really hung out, mostly only saw each other on special occasions. But I started upping the amount I was talking to her, now I don't get to talk to her at all. She's one of my reasons for wanting to do this. It's getting hard. My reasons for doing this are fading away and I can't stretch out my hands to grab them. I can only struggle after them and hope that I can reach them.
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Replies
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Everything in life will fall into place. Things take time but no worries. However when it comes to weight loss...if you do not do it for yourself it will never last. Good luck!0
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don't let any woman get you in a funk. Get a job and get into a healthy routine (eating right and going to the gym), everything else will fall into place.0
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Your main reason to losing weight should be for yourself & your health.
Keep trekking, and you'll reach your goal. )0 -
If your eating foods that are not of nutritious value then the chemicals sugars ect can cause hormone flucuations and depession.0
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Everything in life will fall into place. Things take time but no worries. However when it comes to weight loss...if you do not do it for yourself it will never last. Good luck!
SO TRUE! God Bless you in ALL aspects!0 -
Hang on... Things will get better!:bigsmile:0
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I am doing it for myself as well. But she also had some part. It's like a house built on several foundations. I can hold myself up if I lose a few, but if I've only got one or two left, I dunno whether I can do it.0
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i would suggest losing the weight for yourself not anybody else. its hard enough to get yourself motivated without trying to please someone else! good luck x0
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You have to do this for yourself not anyone else. I started back into exercise as a release from my depression. I'm currently going through a divorce after 22 years of marriage. I'm doing this so I can feel better about myself and the hell with the rest of the world. I would tell you do this for yourself, when you start feeling better about yourself, other people will see it and the relationships will come. Good luck0
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Look at your situation from the outside. Who's going to get what they want: A. the guy who sits around feeling sorry for himself B. the guy who gets up and gets stuff done? Don't be guy A.0
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I am doing it for myself as well. But she also had some part. It's like a house built on several foundations. I can hold myself up if I lose a few, but if I've only got one or two left, I dunno whether I can do it.
You can do it just continue to do focus just on each meal and each workout, take it day by day. Soon you will feel so good you will be able to get any girl you want. There are a lot of fish in the sea haha0 -
The good part, is those two things- no job and no girl - are temporary. Keep focusing on the changes you CAN make for yourself on a daily basis. Keep focusing on working towards a job, because that will instantly boost your mood. The girl (her or another) will fall in to place. I know that when you feel stable and confident, the caliber of girls you attract completely increases0
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yea like everyone else said. you can do it somewhat for her but, she might not be like me but i know as you get more mature you start to not care as much about appearince and more personality so if you are sweet and someone who would be a good partner, i know i dont care to much what the person looks like, i would go out with them so maybe you should just kinda see if she has any potential to be with you or if its just an appearince thing. hope that helps0
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Think of yourself, set your own objectives, for you. Good luck on the job front! Are you worth doing this for? I hope you say yes!!!! Go for it get you to be the best you that you can0
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don't let any woman get you in a funk. Get a job and get into a healthy routine (eating right and going to the gym), everything else will fall into place.
sounds like someone has his own problems with women..see you're not alone!0 -
Lol.0
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A few different things are weighing me down. I haven't got a job, am hoping to have one soon, but the facts that I still can't say that I do hurts. Another thing that hurts, is that there's a girl I wanna ask out, but I just don't feel like I deserve to ask her out. Plus, she hasn't been talking to me lately.
The two of us never really hung out, mostly only saw each other on special occasions. But I started upping the amount I was talking to her, now I don't get to talk to her at all. She's one of my reasons for wanting to do this. It's getting hard. My reasons for doing this are fading away and I can't stretch out my hands to grab them. I can only struggle after them and hope that I can reach them.
I am sure you have heard this before, but I am speaking from my own personal experience. You have to do this, and everything else for yourself. Bcuz it is important to you. Because you want to be healthier, stronger, and feel better about yourself. Each small goal that you attain for yourself will make you feel better about yourself and that will make you stronger and the cycle will repeat. And as you gain more self esteem the other things like finding a job and the girl of your dreams are more likely to fall into place. I know that I need to go job hunting atm since I would like to change careers but I dont feel confident enough to ace those job interviews. But I know it will come in time. So that just proves my point. You must do this for yourself. And give yourself credit for every goal accomplished and build up your self esteem. Do this for you, do everything that you do in your life for you. Bcuz people can come and go in your life. But if you decide what is important to YOU and you decide that nothing and no one is going to get in the way of YOUR dreams then you will get what you want. Wether it is weight loss, getting the job that you want, the house that you want the car that you want, the education that you want. And as you go on that journey hopefully you come across someone that wants to go on that journey with you. My suggestion is right now to be her friend. It is not that you dont deserve her, I dont want to ever hear you talking about yourself like that. But it is possible that right now you are not in a place with yourself to start a new relationship. You need to focus on you. Again these are just my opinions, speaking from my own personal experience.0 -
I'm sorry about your employment situation - that is very stressful and difficult. It can also be a blessing in disguise however. You have time now to excercise and make healthy food! You have time to focus on you. Money is probably tight right now but you don't need fancy food or a gym membership. Go for long walks and find a bodyweight excercise program on the net that you can do at home. Get books on nutrition from the library and learn how to feed your body. You have a little more time right now - why not use it to better your health? The way I see it - you can let yourself get sucked into depression by your circumstances or you can use them to show the world the strong man that you are. A year from now you can continue to be depressed and unhappy with your body or you can be fitter and more confident.
I know it's not this simple - believe me I have struggled with depression my whole life. The only thing that keeps my head above water is taking good care of myself - nourishing my body and exercising, getting enough sleep and taking my fish oil religiously. Best of luck to you. You deserve a great life!0 -
don't let any woman get you in a funk. Get a job and get into a healthy routine (eating right and going to the gym), everything else will fall into place.
sounds like someone has his own problems with women..see you're not alone!
lol -0 -
don't let any woman get you in a funk. Get a job and get into a healthy routine (eating right and going to the gym), everything else will fall into place.
sounds like someone has his own problems with women..see you're not alone!
lol -0 -
I was unemployed for 7 months... so yeah, I know the crappy feeling of it. Life is one big rejection... and only sometimes do jobs even write back to tell you "no." Stings the self-worth, don't it?
However, one thing that kept me sane while unemployed was running. I started out pushing myself to do 3 miles. By the time I had a job, I was putting down an easy 10. It helps to push yourself to go that extra mile when all you have to come back to in an empty inbox.
Good luck on all counts.0 -
We're all here to be each others cheerleaders, so Rah Rah Rah! Kick Some Butt! Rah Rah Rah! Get out of that rut!
If I'm willing to give up my sugary chocolatey mindlessly snacking ways, then you can get up and go for a jog or whatever revs you up, and you can eat a healthy salad with grilled chicken and just enough vinaigrette to taste like a cheat meal. Or even a reasonably portioned steak.
and if you need me to chant my horrible cheer at you tomorrow or the next day, add me. In fact, I could threaten to cheer at you so you keep going just to shut me up. Whichever works. :-) you don't have to believe in yourself, you have a bunch of people doing that for you. What we can't do is force you to make healthy choices. That's all you. And you can do it!0 -
YOU CAN DO IT!!! You have to remember that in life, there are some things you have NO control over. If you've searched for jobs and reached out to this girl and you aren't getting the desired response, there's really nothing you can do to change it, just press forward in your search and keep doing the right thing. But what you do have control over is how you let those things affect you. Letting go of your weight loss goals will only hinder you. You can use this time to get your mind off of things. Who knows, you might meet a better lady out at the gym one day :-) NEVER let how others act make you do things that are detrimental to yourself. Not continuing on this journey is not going to make anything better...you have to ask yourself...am I really going to let the actions of others affect how I treat myself????
At the end of the day, no one owes you anything...you owe it to yourself to do better! Let those negative reactions from others motivate you!!!0 -
I'm sorry about your employment situation - that is very stressful and difficult. It can also be a blessing in disguise however. You have time now to excercise and make healthy food! You have time to focus on you. Money is probably tight right now but you don't need fancy food or a gym membership. Go for long walks and find a bodyweight excercise program on the net that you can do at home. Get books on nutrition from the library and learn how to feed your body. You have a little more time right now - why not use it to better your health? The way I see it - you can let yourself get sucked into depression by your circumstances or you can use them to show the world the strong man that you are. A year from now you can continue to be depressed and unhappy with your body or you can be fitter and more confident.
I know it's not this simple - believe me I have struggled with depression my whole life. The only thing that keeps my head above water is taking good care of myself - nourishing my body and exercising, getting enough sleep and taking my fish oil religiously. Best of luck to you. You deserve a great life!0 -
It's ok to get down once in a while just get right back up and do it for yourself. Your health is the most important thing and finding love will come. Don't listen to the guy who said "girls are ho's and tricks". There was great women and men out there and if you feel good about yourself you will get a job and find love.0
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I was just there three weeks ago...depressed and doubtful.
I changed my way of thinking about my situation. Instead of seeing myself as jobless, I decided to think of my gym time as my most important job. I spend about 3 hours a day there and another hour for a reparative nap. I focus a lot of my day on planning my food choices and spending time on MFP. There are not a lot of people lucky enough to have the time to focus like I do. If I had a job, I would be tired all the time, so I feel priviledged to have this time to take care of me.
I understand about her being your inspiration. Continue to focus on your workouts (even home workouts) and eating better and the weight will start coming off. I just lost ten pounds in ten days! She will notice, and either she will give you more attention...or she won't. Even if she doesn't, I am telling you right now that you will start feeling so much better about yourself that others will notice, and your self esteem will start going up. That is a promise.
Start today. If you do, tomorrow you will feel better. Do it again tomorrow...the next day you will feel even better. Soon, one day becomes two, two becomes a week, a week becomes a month, a month becomes a year....and you will be a different person, one who doesn't have time to be depressed or doubtful.
I have faith in you. Start right now.0 -
Do this for yourself not for anyone else,YOU CAN DO ALL THINGS not some things ALL THINGS ,through Jesus Christ,who is our strength ,our strong tower our hope.0
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Lose the weight for yourself. Start eating healthy and working out and you'll be amazed at how good you'll feel about yourself and just in general. When you feel good about yourself you'll be more confident in asking someone out. Another girl will come along...maybe even a better girl...and you'll never even second guess yourself in asking her out...it'll just happen because you'll have the confidence you need. If this girl doesn't like you the way you are then she doesn't deserve you now or after you lose the weight. I am amazed at how much better I feel in general after becoming healthier and how much more confidence I have in myself that I haven't felt in a very long time. Bottom line, DO THIS...you won't regret it!!!0
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I understand what you mean...I've been there. There are a lot of good people on this site, most of us willing to help and motivate! Feel free to add me that goes for anyone else too!0
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Look, you shouldn't let anything come in your way!
I've liked this guy.. I always tried to seize the chance of talking to him and try to find things in common between us so he could like me back. He liked me but i know he didn't like me that way.. It always felt like my weight was getting in the way. I wasn't ''pretty'' enough for him. After i lost 10 kilograms one year later, he's the one who started approaching me.. but honestly i wasn't interested in him anymore. So yes looks matter but they're not everything... So if you want to ask her out, ask her out now. The worst thing that could happen is that she might say no but that's not the end of the world. There are tons of girls who would kill to go out with you and you're going to find one soon,, might be this girl, might be some other girl.
Not losing weight, will leave you stuck there in a dark place of feeling you're not worthy enough for anything. So lose the weight, let the thinner guy behind all that fat and weight breathe again. Trust me, you'll be happier.
Oh and about the job, fight for something and you'll get it! Don't give up.
Smiiiiiiileeeeee! Life's good!
Oh, and again please don't ever have doubts. Losing weight is AWESOME! OH YEAH B-)
xxx0
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