Emotions around going over calories

KA162 · September 3

I’ve been wondering what it’s like for you all to go over your allotted calories for they day. I’ve had a bad cold this week and weirdly i’ve been super hungry (maybe it’s my body needing more energy to fight sickness after eating below maintenance for over a month). I ate about 400-500 calories over my deficit yesterday, and though I made the conscious choice to, I still feel a little guilty. Rationally I didn’t even hit my maintenance and so it didn’t set me back, but maybe it’s just the feeling of seeing the minus on my food log. I mean, I know it actually all evens out because I’ve eaten below my calories most days, so why am I feeling this way? I knew that I was choosing to listen to my body, and I know it didn’t impact my week in any large way. How do you guys respond when you eat more than your calories, either by choosing to or by it just happening?

Lietchi · September 3

I don't usually trend to get guilty over food, but I'm not sure I can give tips to help others feel that way. First of all, I look at the reality: is it just over goal, or is it over maintenance? And is it a regular picture occurrence or not? Was it planned or unplanned?

When sick or on my period, I always give myself more leeway To follow my hunger. For other occasions where I go over unexpectedly, I will think about what I could possibly have done differently to avoid it. Small example, but I've learned I need to preplan/ have access to a lower calorie snack in the afternoon when I'm at work. If I don't, I'll end up going to the snack machine, which only has higher calorie options.

It's just food. Eating more will slow down progress/ delay teaching my goal, but time will pass anyway 🙂

tomcustombuilder · September 3

You want to base your calorie amount on your weekly number. When you look under the nutrition part of the app, you will see your weekly average that takes seven days worth of calories and divides that by 7 so that is what to look at because every day your calories are going to be different And your body does not operate on a 24 hour clock

springlering62 · September 3

I’m often peckish when I’m sick. I’ve been under the weather the past week, and I’m either over or under 500 or so each day.

It averages out.

Strangely enough, today I’m feeling better and back to working out, but have zero appetite.

Bodies do weird things during illness and recovery.

Just roll with it. It. Just. Doesn’t. Matter. Unless you repeat repeat repeat and hey howdy fall back into the old habits.

And as far as stressing over “negatives”, I learned a long time ago, if I was going to stress and gnaw on it every time it happened, or try to beat myself into having a ton left over the next day, or try to “exercise it off”, then weight loss was going to be futile for me.

I have learned to look at it, shrug, tell myself “it’s gonna happen sometimes”, and permit myself (aka give myself the grace) to start over with a clean slate the next day.

Sometimes I even double down and add something extra to the already negative number, knowing it’ll give me a boost the next day and that the world won’t end overnight.

lol. If The End comes in our sleep, Saint Peter ain’t gonna be looking at last night’s MFP figures.

rudyzenreviews · September 3

I can totally relate to this! It’s easy to feel guilty when the numbers go red, but honestly one day (or even a few) doesn’t undo progress. Listening to your body and especially when you’re sick , is actually a smart move. I try to look at the bigger picture instead of stressing about a single day. Progress is made over weeks and months, not from being perfect every day.

age_is_just_a_number · September 3

I just log it and move on.
One or two days or even a two week vacation of caloric surplus is not you going to destroy your progress and does not define you.
What matters is the average over time; a long time.
I don’t look at this as a diet or a temporary measure. To me, this is a lifestyle and a life long journey.

AnnPT77 · September 4

In my view, the big goal here is to find new, positive long-term habits that gradually take us to a healthy weight, then keep us there long term, ideally permanently. That's a different mindset from "lose weight fast".

Working on my eating/activity habits and working on my mindset are both important.

Mental health is part of that. There is no way that I can live in a happy, balanced way forever while feeling anxiety and guilt about eating. That's not healthy. There's no way I can be perfect every single moment for the rest of my life: Not realistic.

Instead, I think it works fine to do pretty well on average the majority of the time. Some days I eat over goal, even over maintenance, sometimes waaaaay over maintenance. Other days I eat under goal, under maintenance. What matters is the average, and the metric that best measures that average is my weight trend over multiple weeks, not the exact calories I log one day. The calorie logging just helps me stick around the desired average more predictably.

Food isn't a sin, unless we steal it from someone. It's just food, and we need some. Food is for fuel, nutrition, celebration, and enjoyment, among other things . . . in balance. I used to have trouble moderating short-term pleasure in eating so that I could also have long-term health and happiness. That has improved: Better balance.

I've worked on my mindset to not assign food or eating a moral value, not treat it as a character test. Either my overall eating patterns lead toward my goals, or they don't. They don't need to proceed goal-ward at the same pace all of the time, especially not at a pace that's fastFastFAST. Fast is a trap.

Guilt, shame, anxiety, any of those emotions about food/eating: They burn no extra calories, and they feel icky, ruining the present moments, so why indulge in them? They don't help me in any way.

If I did something counter to my goals, it's done, water under the bridge, unchangeable. IMO, the only rational act is to improve my plan to minimize chances that the same unwanted actions will happen in the same circumstances next time those circumstances come around.

If I regret something in retrospect, my idea is to spend no more than about ten minutes thinking about how to avoid doing it again - some realistic behavior I can try when the trigger recurs. I rehearse that in my head a few times, vividly, like a mini-movie, so it sticks. Then it's time to let it go until that trigger rolls around again, and I can test the new tactic. If it works, keep that tactic; if it doesn't, try something else. Keep going until the overall new habit-set is adequate. Yes, adequate.

It's more like a fun, productive science fair experiment for grown-ups, less like an epic battle between good and evil.

As context: I lost from obese to healthy weight nearly 10 years ago, and have stayed in a healthy range and the same jeans size since. I'm slightly more relaxed about the process is some ways now, but the above has been my basic orientation throughout.

cmriverside · September 4

Perfectionism mixed with anxiety and fear. Weight loss is particularly triggery because it involves numbers and numbers are measures of exactitude, right?

I get that little twinge too, and I know it's not a huge thing.

I worry that one day will lead to six days and then to six months, six years, because I've done those things too. That's how I got to be overweight. It's a natural fear once I've made some big mistake and learned from it to not want to make that one again.

AdahPotatah2024 · September 4

Not everyone should count calories. If it's giving you disordered eating patterns/ causing guilt you might just want to focus on eating healthy food/portions instead of calories.

I use the food diary as a mealplan.to stick to about 1500 calories so if I eat more than that I know I'm going over and might want to cut back during the week somewhere. No guilt! This method works best for me.

Emotions around going over calories

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