Don't Know What To Do!!!!

ek724q
ek724q Posts: 95 Member
edited October 3 in Health and Weight Loss
my daughter is 9 years old and weighs 134 pounds, she is 4'9 and her waist is 37 1/2 in, I have done everything and have no clue what else to do to stop her weight gain. She has started the year out in Feb at 113, now she has gained over 20 pounds. What do I do?
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Replies

  • tiedye
    tiedye Posts: 331 Member
    Take her to a doctor. Ask for a referral for a nutritionist.
  • Natalie49
    Natalie49 Posts: 210 Member
    Take her to a doctor! He would know better :)
  • jedi9393
    jedi9393 Posts: 121
    food choices? what is she eating??
  • monica208
    monica208 Posts: 229
    my suggestion would be to swap healthier food options for dinners/lunch/breakfast/snacks... join a gym or excercise with her... have her join a sport etc... good luck to you
  • Coltsman4ever
    Coltsman4ever Posts: 602 Member
    I would think if you take her for a checkup to make sure she doesn't have a thyroid or any other problem, you can feed her healthy food and make sure she has plenty of activity in her life. Sign her up for soccer, dance, karate or something else where she gets lots of exercise. The lbs will start coming off. It seems like kids these days are so much less active than they used to be.
    Hope everything works out for you.
  • ek724q
    ek724q Posts: 95 Member
    LOL, She has been going to the nutritionist since Feb. Seems to just be getting worse. They just tell us that she needs to eat better. Well I would not take her over an hour and 1/2 away to the doctor if I thought they would not help. But she has gain this 20 pounds actually going to the doctor too. So that is what I mean. I have tried everything. Doctor and all
  • abbie017
    abbie017 Posts: 410
    Does she exercise? Exercise together, or do something fun that will burn calories (walks, playing sports, etc) with her. Also, she's nine, so I assume she's not preparing her own meals. Cook smaller portions with lots of lean proteins and veggies, and restrict treats to special occasions. No more desserts, sugary snacks, etc.
  • Givemewings
    Givemewings Posts: 864 Member
    Don't worry for a start. But remember, as her mother, you can really help her. My son started to gain weight. I have just been making sure he is not eating too much and that I put the right choices in front of him I limit chocolate/sweets to a once a week treat and dessert is usually fruit or a yoghurt, and occasionally something more naughty for a treat. He is looking really healthy now. And make sure she gets exercise of some sort. If she doesn't do anything active for fun, perhaps you could make going for a walk a regular thing, or get her to do exercise dvds ( simple ones) with you for fun? I'm no expert, but this would be my advice.
  • Givemewings
    Givemewings Posts: 864 Member
    The others are right though. If you think there might be a problem, go to a doctor. It can't hurt.
  • ek724q
    ek724q Posts: 95 Member
    She loves riding bikes and playing out side, She does as much activity as she can. I never have to tell her quit watching tv. She is in activities as long as I can afford them. I am just stuck. I try to make her eat healthy. But she always seems to get what she wants at my mom's house. I am working on it. Just hard when my mom does not help out with the healthy eatting.
  • Really her body is dealing with alot at that age. That is the same age I was when I started gaining weight. I would talk to her doctor and remember alot of it is hormonal but it is nice to see you are concerned about it now and not later. I wish my parents would of don't the same. I have a daughter and she is 11yrs, as soon as she is 12 she will be joining the rest of the family in the gym but otherwise I only keep healthy food in the house and we do things together. We do have to remember they are still kids and still need to treat them as kids while teaching healthy habits. Best of luck.
  • LizC26
    LizC26 Posts: 319 Member
    If it were my child, I'd probably her to another Dr. if that's all the first one has done for you. Not all Dr's are brilliant or even decent. Other than that, you have to control/restrict what she eats and what activity she has, even if it makes you seem like a bad mom to her.
  • mandycasey
    mandycasey Posts: 274 Member
    Hi does she have a scooter ? My daughter is 9 and we try taking her scooter out everywhere. Our best investment was a big trampoline 4 the garden - they spend hours jumping about. Ok their diets could be better but i believe that kids should have the sweets snacks as well as healthy everyday - i was restricted and repelled and eat far too many - which i am still battling now. I think if they get alot of exercise it should keep the weight down, hope you get some good advice xx
  • margo36
    margo36 Posts: 222 Member
    If you are feeding her a healthy diet with correct size portions she must be getting food from somewhere else if she is putting weight. How about taking up some family activities such as cycling, swimming etc. She needs to join Mum in her weight loss plan. Maybe a weekly girlie weigh in together followed by a non food treat for hitting weight loss targets. You could cheer each other on.
  • JS70
    JS70 Posts: 95 Member
    My daughters are 10 and 12 and I have been struggling with this for several years as well. My 12 year old was just told by her doctor that she needed to lose 25 pounds. She is about 5 foot and weighs 130 punds. I do my best to encourage exercise every chance I get and offer healthy foods. I also made it a point to not let them eat at school anymore which has really helped. I let them pick out healthy choices at the store for the week and they take healthy lunches to school. I think over time, these choices will help. Good luck with your daughter!
  • candicole007
    candicole007 Posts: 120 Member
    She loves riding bikes and playing out side, She does as much activity as she can. I never have to tell her quit watching tv. She is in activities as long as I can afford them. I am just stuck. I try to make her eat healthy. But she always seems to get what she wants at my mom's house. I am working on it. Just hard when my mom does not help out with the healthy eatting.

    Time to tell mom to either get with the program or she's going to have to only visit with her at your house. Tough love :)
  • I agree with the tough love approach with your mom. Make sure she understands it's for your daughter's health and not just because you feel like making rules. If she isn't on board with getting your daughter healthy, her time with her should be limited. It's one thing to spoil a child, but quite another to endanger their health and wellbeing.

    I would recommend not forbidding certain things in your house, but scaling back and work with her on healthy portion sizes and moderation. It may be that she's binging on things outside the house if she feels deprived. Hell, I eat chocolate every day, but in small amounts and I eat healthy otherwise (and exercise).

    I also agree with getting a second opinion from a doctor, there may be an underlying medical issue. I'd hate to think he's neglecting to look into things further if he just thinks she's lazy and overeating.
  • She loves riding bikes and playing out side, She does as much activity as she can. I never have to tell her quit watching tv. She is in activities as long as I can afford them. I am just stuck. I try to make her eat healthy. But she always seems to get what she wants at my mom's house. I am working on it. Just hard when my mom does not help out with the healthy eatting.

    Time to tell mom to either get with the program or she's going to have to only visit with her at your house. Tough love :)

    What she says! Tough love momma!!!
  • margo36
    margo36 Posts: 222 Member
    She loves riding bikes and playing out side, She does as much activity as she can. I never have to tell her quit watching tv. She is in activities as long as I can afford them. I am just stuck. I try to make her eat healthy. But she always seems to get what she wants at my mom's house. I am working on it. Just hard when my mom does not help out with the healthy eatting.
    Time for a serious talk with your Mother. I would go down the route of telling your Mother about your fears for your daughters future health and ask for her help by only giving your daughter healthy snacks. You and your Mum need to work together on this one.
  • sweetCJ
    sweetCJ Posts: 144
    The situation with your Mom sounds alot like what I have with my Mom... The only difference for me is that my daughter hates chocolate and sweets and would much prefer going for the apple. My Mom lets her do whatever she wants and when she gets back to my house she thinks she can run the boat. I sat down with my Mom and told her that I was raising my daughter the same way she raised us and if she can't respect what I do with my daughter, then she would not be able to she her again. It's hard, I know, cause my daughter loves my Mom...but priorities is your daughters health. also, she is only 9, she might grow out of it as she gets older. Offer her healthy snacks and a well balanced diet from the food guide. Make sure she is not exchanging any food with kids from school (my school does not tolerate and junk food and food exchange), go out for a 30 minutes walk every night with her. I got a pilates for dummies DVD (very basic exercise) and I do that with my daughter every second night...I too have not a bank attached to my hips to register her to every sports activities there are in my town...you just have to find simple free stuff to do and make it fun.

    Good luck
  • Hellbent_Heidi
    Hellbent_Heidi Posts: 3,669 Member
    Yeah, I'm with the others about talking to your mother and telling her to get with the program. Its difficult enough to be a girl going through the emotional and physical changes of puberty without that added weight problem. Your mother isn't doing her any favors by giving her junk food.

    If I were in your shoes, I'd try to find another doctor to get a second opinion as well....there is a good chance of some underlying issue there if she's continuing to gain and is pretty active. Best of luck to you and your daughter...my heart goes out to her!
  • Seminolegirl97
    Seminolegirl97 Posts: 306 Member
    My best friend has a 13 year old. My friend runs a lot of 5K's. So she asked her daughter if she wanted to run a race with her. Well that child got hooked on the competition of running and the training. It's an activity they do together and an acitivity us adults in her life can support and join in as well. It takes a village to raise a kid. Good luck. I'm sure it will be ok.
  • I had similar problems when I was a kid, but going to the nutritionist helped. More because they taught me about HOW to eat...slowly...chew each bite 40 times, not to feel guilty about leaving food on my plate, not to go back for extra helpings, etc. Also, my Grandmother started asking me to walk with her. We walked about 2 miles every day (not all that long) during a summer and it helped SO much! I lost about 40 pounds in three months, just because I was aware of how I was eating and doing more activity. Maybe start walking with her in the evenings? Tell her you need help staying motivated, so she'll think she's doing it for you!
  • voluptuous_veggie
    voluptuous_veggie Posts: 476 Member
    Does she go to school or is she homeschooled? I only ask, because a lot of kids at that age start sneaking/hoarding food at school, when mom and dad aren't around to see. If she is in school, there are probably people there you can talk to. A school nurse or counselor, who can make sure she isn't sneaking junk. They might also be able to tell you if there is anything else possibly concerning that you aren't seeing at home - fatigue, loss of interest, etc. The problem might be more than skin deep. I suggest talking to her teachers, nurses, counselors, etc.
  • kapeluza
    kapeluza Posts: 3,434 Member
    Does she exercise? Are you feeding her healthy foods or junk? Start there? Maybe take her to the doctor and see a nutritionist?
    Does she drink soda? Does she eat sweets? Does she eat that crap they serve at school? Does she have eating hours or do you guys eat whenever?

    Never mind, I saw what you posted about the doctor. Does she eat clean? Veggies and fruits?
  • Lizzy_Sunflower
    Lizzy_Sunflower Posts: 1,510 Member
    My best friend has a 13 year old. My friend runs a lot of 5K's. So she asked her daughter if she wanted to run a race with her. Well that child got hooked on the competition of running and the training. It's an activity they do together and an acitivity us adults in her life can support and join in as well. It takes a village to raise a kid. Good luck. I'm sure it will be ok.

    This is GREAT advice! you could start a C25k program with her. Time well spent towards a healthier life together.

    www.c25k.com and there are great podcasts and apps available

    Good Luck!

    P.S. the post about deeper problems kind of struck a note with me. maybe a counselor or therapist could help. I wish someone had taken a closer look at my problems when I was that age, it would have solved a lot of heartache later in life. You need to sit your mom down and have a heart to heart as well. She needs to be on the same page with you. Best of luck
  • joybell32
    joybell32 Posts: 252 Member
    All of the above ideas are great. If you are currently taking her to a doctor and getting nowhere, get a second opinion. Find a different nutritionist. Definiently, cut out soda and limit snacks. Also, too, one thing that i don't recall seeing is: Make sure she knows that no matter what she is loved and appreciated for the beautiful young lady that she is. Don't focus on her weight. If that is your focus, that will become her focus too, which could lead to an eating disorder. I walk that fine line wiht my kids. They are young, but I was young once too and got fat pretty quick and have been dealing with it my whole life. I don't want that for my kids.
  • k2quiere
    k2quiere Posts: 4,151 Member
    LOL, She has been going to the nutritionist since Feb. Seems to just be getting worse. They just tell us that she needs to eat better. Well I would not take her over an hour and 1/2 away to the doctor if I thought they would not help. But she has gain this 20 pounds actually going to the doctor too. So that is what I mean. I have tried everything. Doctor and all

    I would have the doc check her hormone levels. Yes, she's young, but I started my period at 9. When my daughter started hers at 11, she gained nearly 40lbs during that first year.
  • stubbysticks
    stubbysticks Posts: 1,275 Member
    Oh, this post hits home for me since I grew up a chubby kid. I have a 13 yr old daughter who has become overweight as well. Now that I've successfully been able to lose some weight, I've thought about what might have made a difference back then. I think the biggest thing is teaching her the connection between what she CHOOSES to put in her mouth & her weight. The fact that she's active is wonderful, & you'll never be able to control everthing she has access to. But expressing to her how those choices are directly impacting her weight is something you can do.

    Beware of shame. That's a feeling I remember vividly from my childhood. The last thing she needs is to be ashamed of her size. Be as positive & constructive as you can. You can tell her she doesn't need to "diet" because thinking she has to stay away from treats forever will make her want them more. Maybe tell her how to have them in moderation, like limiting the richest foods to once a week or something like that.

    Is she motivated to do anything about her weight at all?
  • nfprox
    nfprox Posts: 9 Member
    Have you checked to see if she is starting puberty a little early? Estrogen is stored in body fat.
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