My answer to "How do you stay focused?"

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dannylives
dannylives Posts: 611
in Health and Weight Loss
I planned and failed. I bought books/magazines and failed. I put pictures on my wall and failed. I attempted to lose weight by exercising and failed. I started jogging ad failed. I got mad and forced myself to workout and failed. I built elaborate workout plans and failed. I joined MFP and failed. It's all these failures that have got me to the point where I know what I need to do to stay focused. All these failures have gotten me to the point where I know that it's my mind that keeps me from doing what I need to do. I had all the time in the world to lose weight but didn't, because of my mind. I'm still not 100% focused. I still waste time when I could be doing something to lose weight (like cook and plan meals for the entire week.) But as far as daily focus and motivation goes, I have learned to snap out of doing nothing, to snap out of saying "No" to working out, to snap out of not wanting to drink all that freakin' water! These are things that I have just learned maybe 2 weeks ago. ONLY BECAUSE I FAILED, COULD I ZERO IN ON WHAT THE PROBLEM WAS. My way of thinking about what it took to lose weight was messed up. I did not know how much focus, drive, and daily motivation that losing weight takes. NEVER give up. :)

Replies

  • anubis609
    anubis609 Posts: 3,966 Member
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    Failure guides you to the path to success. They are life's challenges given in order to prove your mental strength. Welcome failure. Accept it. And make appropriate changes.
  • fiberartist219
    fiberartist219 Posts: 1,865 Member
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    This reminds me of the Chumbawumba song, Tubthumping. It goes, "I get knocked down, but I get up again. You're never gonna keep me down." And then there's a little bit about "pissing the night away."

    You just can't let the failures hold you back. They say that Thomas Edison figured out 100 different ways NOT to make a light bulb before he actually succeeded.

    Maybe the answer to staying focused is that you don't. You just keep trying until you do.
  • ronamy44
    ronamy44 Posts: 1
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    Great inspiration..thank you~
  • dajn44
    dajn44 Posts: 13
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    I agree with all you just said it is all about focus. It is a mind set staying on track..... You know what to do it is just making yourself do it and stay on track. Have started back today. Lost 60 pounds gained ten beack because I stopped doing all the right things and got lazy. am now refocused. Keep posting it helps
  • azzledazzle
    azzledazzle Posts: 79
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    Dont be so tough on yourself, It IS hard to lose weight and its about changing your lifestyle forever, Not just until you have lost the weight.

    Allow yourself a day off, a cheat day or whatever you want to call it.

    if you have more than 1 cheat day a week, deal with it, dont think about it, just start again the next day and forget it.

    I used to beat myself up all the time for 'cheating' and it got to the point where i thought, 'oh well i have had 3 biscuits, i might as well just finish off the packet' Thats where i went wrong.

    also, the thing that keeps me on track is knowing that 1 day i WILL have the body ive always wanted, It may take a little longer because i allow myself cheat days, But 1 day i will get there.

    Pick out some old photos that you want to try to look like again, (ive got some from about 4 years ago when i was so happy and slim, and i look at them to motivate me. I also listen music when im working out as this helps motivate me too.

    it takes 28 days for something to become a routine, so force yourself to eat right / exercise more and 28 days later it will be part of your life and not so hard.... (im only on day 19 lol)

    sorry for the long post, but think happy and ignore the bad feelings.
  • SWEETS1234
    SWEETS1234 Posts: 243 Member
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    It's not a DIET... sometimes I find that we just put the wrong label on it and then we can't keep up or live with it. It becomes to much work, to much effort and seems unattainable.

    It's a lifestyle change. Making little alternations here and there, so that you're comfortable with it and don't feel chained by it.

    I have believe if you truly want to find the heathlier you...you WILL. Sucess is just around the corner, one step at a time. GOOD LUCK :flowerforyou:
  • purplehorizon
    purplehorizon Posts: 16 Member
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    Thank you for this post - this seems to be my problem too. Just staying focused on your goal maybe? I might give it a try :)
  • 00001111
    00001111 Posts: 1
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    Its not easy but it can be done. For me I stay focused by seeing the numbers on the scale going down and my friends and family telling that my face really shows that I am loosing weight. It is an incentive, it keeps me wanting to watch my calories.
  • lisaisso
    lisaisso Posts: 337 Member
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    :heart:
  • alyssamiller77
    alyssamiller77 Posts: 891 Member
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    I did not know how much focus, drive, and daily motivation that losing weight takes.

    I think this is a common problem for many that attempt to lose weight. I think, for whatever reason, people underestimate the degree of focus and commitment that it really takes. I don't think people always realize how significant of a change needs to be made to their lifestyles, how strongly they must battle against temptations, how unforgiving their bodies can be if they don't follow the plan. No doubt the first step before ever attempting to become healthier needs to be a solid period of mental preparation and planning.
  • Rachaelluvszipped
    Rachaelluvszipped Posts: 768 Member
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    Trial and error is what helps us get to where we need to be..as we all learn from past mistakes..or most of us do anyways..sometimes, it takes more mistakes than anything to get us, to push us in the right path...Your not alone in this..I've done many fad diets, and have learned the only way is just eating what I enjoy in moderation but also including veggies, and more protein in my diet..as I have had a little too many carbs and fats in my previous meal planning..and obviously I wasn't eating enough at one point....

    Making a mini goal can also help us to stay focused in the right direction...I myself, put 5 pounds for each month...so far losing inches as well..is a bonus in itself.. when you don't lose the weight...its probably the inches your losing and gaining the muscles to burn the fat that we want to lose..so, never give up...it a slow process..and we just gotta keep going..it will happen..and when it does..BAM! Your going to say..WOW..look at what I accomplished!
  • AshleyNicole8686
    AshleyNicole8686 Posts: 103 Member
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    Yep! That is it slow and steady wins the race, just keep at it!
  • meowow
    meowow Posts: 42 Member
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    love this. :D
  • Giantess
    Giantess Posts: 213 Member
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    I will never forget my (always skinny and very active) father saying to me, "It's not hard to lose weight. Just go for a run and don't eat so much. Why is this so hard for you? Where's your willpower?"

    The man is almost 70. He never met a dessert he couldn't turn his nose up at. Never ate something because he felt sad. Never felt the stab of pain in his side or the constriction of his throat as he exercised because it was too much, too soon. Never met a vegetable he didn't like. Still fit into his jeans from when he was a freshman at the Naval Academy. (I know, because I made him throw them out. Bell bottoms for dudes, dad? Really?)

    I grew up thinking I was just the loser anomaly, sick in the head in a skinny, active, family. It was, for whatever reason, just effortless for them. All of them. All but me, and one cousin, who got badgered and whispered about and "encouraged" and shamed. "You're so pretty, if only you'd lose weight."

    For us NORMAL PEOPLE, who like sitting on our duffs on a lazy afternoon with a book, who like chocolate because it tastes good, and who eat it when we get sad to make us feel better...for us, your words ring true as bells.

    Nobody tells you how hard it is going to be to sink hooks into the fabric of your everyday life an HAUL on it till it starts to move in the direction you want. Nobody tells you that if you stop hauling with ALL YOUR WEIGHT and focus and energy, if you rest for just a second, you stall. Nobody tells you that you're fighting an uphill battle, and there is NO REST.

    Weight Loss is war. Nobody tells you that. Mental preparation and fortitude are way more than half the battle.
  • dannylives
    dannylives Posts: 611
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    I will never forget my (always skinny and very active) father saying to me, "It's not hard to lose weight. Just go for a run and don't eat so much. Why is this so hard for you? Where's your willpower?"

    The man is almost 70. He never met a dessert he couldn't turn his nose up at. Never ate something because he felt sad. Never felt the stab of pain in his side or the constriction of his throat as he exercised because it was too much, too soon. Never met a vegetable he didn't like. Still fit into his jeans from when he was a freshman at the Naval Academy. (I know, because I made him throw them out. Bell bottoms for dudes, dad? Really?)

    I grew up thinking I was just the loser anomaly, sick in the head in a skinny, active, family. It was, for whatever reason, just effortless for them. All of them. All but me, and one cousin, who got badgered and whispered about and "encouraged" and shamed. "You're so pretty, if only you'd lose weight."

    For us NORMAL PEOPLE, who like sitting on our duffs on a lazy afternoon with a book, who like chocolate because it tastes good, and who eat it when we get sad to make us feel better...for us, your words ring true as bells.

    Nobody tells you how hard it is going to be to sink hooks into the fabric of your everyday life an HAUL on it till it starts to move in the direction you want. Nobody tells you that if you stop hauling with ALL YOUR WEIGHT and focus and energy, if you rest for just a second, you stall. Nobody tells you that you're fighting an uphill battle, and there is NO REST.

    Weight Loss is war. Nobody tells you that. Mental preparation and fortitude are way more than half the battle.

    That was beautiful Giantess, thank you. Weight loss is war! Onward! :)
  • wallyg7
    wallyg7 Posts: 15 Member
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    Dude, now that you know what the enemy is you are in the best position to fight it. Fight your negative thinking. Focus on that! You cheer everyone on MFP and we are happier and more successful for it. Thank you sincerely. Cheer yourself on too, though. Love and take care of your house, not the house that keeps you out of rain and wind but the house that contains your heart and soul. I hope I am not getting too deep but when you really believe that your heart and soul are worthy of being housed in a better container, you will naturally make the decisions that make the pounds drop. Set goals one day at a time and bask in the good feelings that comes with reaching them one day at a time.
  • Espressocycle
    Espressocycle Posts: 2,245 Member
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    This reminds me of the Chumbawumba song, Tubthumping. It goes, "I get knocked down, but I get up again. You're never gonna keep me down." And then there's a little bit about "pissing the night away."

    He takes a whiskey drink, he takes a vodka drink, he takes a cider drink, he takes a lager drink. Then he is 800 calories over for the night!

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