The Link Between Being Stuck and Losing Weight

The Link Between Being Stuck and Losing Weight

Ninety-five percent of dieters gain their weight back. This discouraging statistic prompted the beginning of a group called the National Weight Control Registry (NWCR) comprised of researchers at Brown University and the University of Colorado. They became interested in determining what brought success to that five percent of people who were able to lose weight and keep it off. What they found was that the people who kept the weight off didn't just change their eating patterns alone, they also changed their life in some way.

Perhaps you know someone who has lost weight and kept it off. When you inquired into how they succeeded, you might have heard them say something like:

"I was going through menopause and didn't want to go into the next part of my life as a heavy person."

"I was ready to start having fun in life."

"It was time to get my career into high gear."

"I was going through a divorce."

"It was time to stop being so afraid of rejection."

"I lost someone dear to me and realized it was time take care of myself."

"I was ready to own my sexuality."

The place where they were stuck wasn't just related to their weight, it was related to some other aspect of their life. When you're stuck, you're emotionally hungry. The people who have dieted successfully got fed up with being emotionally hungry. By dealing with the underlying issues that fueled their emotional hunger they were able to turn off their Hunger Switch (to read more about the Hunger Switch). Their physical hunger became manageable. They were able to adhere to a sensible eating plan and lose weight and keep it off with no dieting.

This didn't happen all at once. They had to learn how to turn off their emotional hunger switch. They had to contend with the realization it wasn't just that they felt emotionally hungry. It was that they felt powerless to do anything about their emotional hunger. (You can read more about how feeling powerless encourages overeating in the article "Overeating: A Habit to Be Broken") They didn't believe they could effect any change in the parts of their lives that were unsatisfying. They had to prove to themselves that it wasn't true, that they weren't powerless.

In an internet study we conducted last year with 7500 people, we determined there is a strong relationship between being overweight and feeling stuck. For roughly two thirds of serious dieters, going on a diet was part of their attempt to do something positive about their life. A way to get unstuck, so to speak.

If you feel stuck in life, you're not alone. Twenty-eight million people in this country are on anti-depressants. Most of them are on medication for sub-clinical depression which means they're not mentally ill, they're unsatisfied with their lives. What are the areas where you feel stuck in your life?

Being stuck can be like having one foot on the gas pedal and another foot on the brake. Your foot is on the gas pedal because you desperately want to go somewhere--that somewhere in the future where it feels like your life is going to be on track. But your foot is on the brake because you're afraid.

Emotional hunger is there to indicate where you need to make a change. When a person eats because emotional hunger is too uncomfortable, they disable their body's internal guidance system. They no longer have an inner compass leading them toward the things they want or leading them away from the things they don't want. Once this happens, they are more likely to get stuck.

For example, one of our online users has a husband who works nights. He was home for the first night in awhile and was watching baseball. She felt emotionally hungry. Her hunger switch got turned on and she felt like she wanted to go to the fridge and binge. But she stopped herself. She thought, I could say something stupid like, "You never spend any time with me." But she didn't. She thought things through. She realized what feeling was fueling her emotional hunger and she said, "I miss you." Her husband turned off the TV. She was able to get unstuck in her relationship with her husband by being honest with her feelings. When she did that she could see that even if she ate everything in her fridge, it couldn't have filled the space of wanting to connect with her husband.

By taking the first steps to get unstuck (cleaning out your closets, resolving things with a sibling you haven't spoken to in years, managing your finances, organizing your cds or photos), you start moving out of your rut. The efficacy of this was proven in the study that the National Weight Control Registry conducted.

Be honest with yourself. Are you ready to get unstuck? Take your foot off the brake and you'll begin to move forward. Once you're moving you can steer yourself where you want to go.